August 31, 2020
tried working on some music and it did not go well! I tried everything.
I tried plucking THIS string, I tried plucking THAT string I even gave it a shot
and tried plucking BOTH at the same time, and NOTHIN'! Moral of the
story is I think my guitar is missing several strings. Sounds like
four to me! Anyway finished #BeerForTheWeekendEndOfSummerToRemember.
So now I'm totally sober! IT BURNS!!!! II finished #CobraKaiSummerToSensaiFor
Season I and I have ZERO INTEREST in continuing onto Season II for AT LEAST the
next few hours. I'm busy here, what of it. Get off my bcak is
the point. Why Is Everyone Always On My Back. Feels like a #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor
kind of day. Why there's those 3 dozen I really like Minus the 1 dozen I
really REALLY like. I've seen those ones TOO MANY TIMES.
Sorry episode with Don Rickles and Bobcat Goldthwait, MAYBE IN A WEEK OR SO.
Something along those lines. VISITOR in the house
right now. We're talkin Nurse who gives my Dad monthly Transfusions.
Not from her own blood. I assume she gets it as some hospital. Maybe
she's buying cheap blood off the street, I don't wanna get into her personal
business. What kinda lunch I got set up for today. Either Salmon +
Rice, Corn't Beef Sandwich + Soup or French'd Bread Pizza. I had one of
the SMART TV Dinners for breakfast. It's the most important meal of the
day o so I'm told. Makes sense to me. Food is energy. You
don't need energy at night Before Sleep. You need it at Day Break before
your Long Day of Expending Energy. SO LONG Episode With Two Gamblers
who end up losing MORE THAN THEY GAMBLED FOR!!! YEEHEE.. wait a second no
they don't. They do LOSE something(s) but It Is What They Gambled
For. My mistake.
I can watch Jon Lovitz Episode again, though.
That's a Top Dozen that I may be open to. That's a classic! You
haven't seen Jon Lovitz until you've seen him in an #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor.
Also you have to see him THIS SUMMER. THIS SUMMER IS POSSIBLY THE MAIN
SUMMER TO SHRIEK FOR IN OUR LIFETIMES. There maybe future Summers to
Shriek For but nothing is guaranteed. The good news is my 8 Track
Still Works AND isn't dusty as fuck or anything. I do have A Full
Song in my pocket-- The New Monkees Theme Song-- but I KEEP FAILING AT DOING
IT PROFICIENTLY ITS NOT FAIR. All those hours play guitar day after
day for all those hours for so many days and MONTHS and YEARS even. All
for Putt. Can't even record a decent 1 and half hour Theme Song that can
be easily reduced to 45 seconds or 30 seconds WHATEVER THE NETWORK DECIDES.
I guess on the Vocals its hard because I Am Not Four
Different People. Well, maybe... I'm gonna have to check into that
one... Anyway the point is what else is going on and crap. Probably
gonna go with the Salmon + Rice instead of the Soup + Sandwich. Also
French'd Bread Pizza Was Just A Decoy I never intended on that. But the
point is I'll Probably be having Lunch while Nurse is still here, IN THE
KITCHEN, and I'd rather only stand at the microwave for 2-4 minutes to heat up
the Salmon and Rice as opposed to the 6-8 minutes for the Soup. Also
Mainly I just would appreciate it Going Down My Gullet right about now.
Salmon, huh? NOW WE'RE TALKING! Besides had some delicious Pastrami
with soup Last Night. The point is Hey This Paragraph Is Over! Cool!
Man that SMART Breakfast sure was decent. We're talking a few pieces of
chicken (they called it Sesame Chicken BUT I TASTED ON SESAME) and some
broccoli, red peppers (not spicy kind the Relatively Mushy Kind) some PASTA
SPAGHETTIISH PASTA and I dunno that might have been it. It was pretty
good. I'd Re-Up with that meal at some point in the future Sure Why
Whatever. I'd say a solid 40% chance I'm gettin' my
mom cigarettes tomorrow or Wednesday. In which case I get to re-up with
Beer A Day Or Two In Advance. I LIKE THOSE ODDS. Anyway
tomorrow is a new month. Pshh. September. Yawn. Wake
me up when September ends. Ya know that sort of thing. Closing
in on Six Straight Months With an entry every day. At this point its more
of a source of shame than pride. But what are ya gonna do.
The point is I was able to watch a Clean Block of Simpsons with my 1 hour Circle
Walking because the last episode was a Halloween Episode so I stopped 2/3rds in.
I walk an hour. Each episode is around 21-22 minutes Sans Opening Theme
and Closing Credits. This Halloween Episode was a God Send!
Halfway Through The Entry
Well, if you Round Up. A Lot. Anyway took a generally but
not COMPLETELY unfulfilling break reading twitter. I liked the parts where
I was like hmm read these guys 40 minute ago wonder what's up with them tweet
feeds NOW. My best guess is lunch will correspond with Part III.
And #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor will correspond with Entry Ending.
Days without Beer aren't so bad once I get The Work Of Crazysheet Out Of The
Way. I get a false inflated sense of self satisfaction and Then I Get
To Watch All The Dumb TV I Can Handle. Not to mention LUNCH Near The End
Of Entry And DINNER Near The End Of Day. It's not a, "False," sense of
satisfaction. It is Indeed A SENSE OF SATISFACTION. I still stand
by, "Inflated," though.
What else. Jim Gaffigan going Off on Twitter.
I found it interesting because he provides humor to the world and now he
provides Oh So Much More. I'm not joking I liked it. It sounds
like a joke Because I Didn't Know How To Put What Else He Is Now Providing.
So I Settled On The Sarcastic Sounding, "Oh So Much More," but I meant it!
So that settles THAT. How come Jim Gaffigan never appeared on the Podcasts
I like around 2007-2010. He was part of that Comedy, "Scene." Did
he appear on those podcasts? Yeah Probably. Not very memorable
though! Gotta work on that Podcast Material. C'mon you can
excuse me for not remembering I've listened to POSSIBLY UP TO A THOUSAND
PODCASTS IN THAT PERIOD. I just can't PICTURE it in my mind, Gaffigan with
the likes of a Jimmy Pardo. Sure you can picture Audio Podcasts in your
mind. That's where the fun comes in! Hmm maybe I
should start a podcast. Nah that sounds like I Would Fail At That.
Well That Settles That.
Anyway, I dunno. It is looking possible Lunch will
be after Nurse leaves but I think I'm stickin' with the Salmon and Rice.
Prove me wrong! You can't HASN'T EVEN HAPPENED YET. YOU'RE TOO EARLY
AND YOU JUST GAVE AWAY YOUR POSITION. Oh Jim has committed a
GAFFE Again. I MUST BE SOME SORT OF GENIUS WITH THAT ONE.
NOPE APPEARS NOT TO HAVE APPEARED ON JIMMY PARDO: THE NEVER NOT FUNNY PODCAST.
Probably a disagreement/beef over Who Was The Best Jim(my). He was on
other podcasts though. So we've got THAT going for us. I went
through a period of a few months At Beginning Of Year getting heavily back into
podcasts. What with my 5 walks a day. Quarantine Changed All That.
WHY GOD WHY?!? Oh hey I'm LEGITIMATELY halfway through the entry now.
How about that. Presumably. That sort of thing. Hey I just
walked away for a second to reheat my coffee and I was like WHO IN THE HELL
IS ENTERTAINED BY ME TALKING ABOUT HOW I USED TO LISTEN TO PODCASTS THEN STOPPED
THEN STARTED UP AGAIN THEN STOPPED AGAIN. If you were entertained
by that, e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
If you werenweren't entertained by that, e-mail me at
email@example.com. In fact
in comments just stick with that e-mail.
Anyway. Nurse Just Left! About 45 minutes
before I anticipated. But the point is I gotta help my Dad move some boxes
and IV Poles around in 10 minutes but that should only take 5 minutes.
Entertained by that story? I gotta help my Dad move some boxes around?
YOU KNOW WHERE TO REACH ME. Anyway. Hmm. That French
Bread was only a Decoy but MAYBE I COULD HAVE IT... I'd probably
PREFER it at this point But Gotta Eat The Fresh Food First! That's my
Campaign Promise of How I Eat My Weekly Groceries. Fresh Food First.
It's got alliteration so you KNOW it's the tops. Anyway I think a lot of
Political Campaign Slogans utilize alliteration or sometimes rhyme but I haven't
seen a solid Palindrome Yet? Closest thing I could think of is in the late
1990's WWF's weekly TV show Raw advertised itself as Raw Is War.
Which overall isn't a palindrome on account of the, "Is," but their heart was in
the right place.
Cool! Now that I think about it, it was weird that both
the WWF and WCW's weekly shows were both Monday Night. You'd think they'd
agree to some detente where they could each get the most amount of an audience
who is interested in wrestling. That's also why I thought Jay Leno should
host his show at 7 PM so as not to encroach on David Letterman. I never
thought that. I could give a fig about Jay Leno when I was a kid. Or
an adult. I dunno he seems like a decent guy For The Most Part.
He's never KILLED anyone at least. I don't THINK so. It would
be pretty out of character, and if he did, he must have had a good reason.
I just don't see Jay Leno murdering someone without at least a decent
justification, I'm sorry, that's how I feel. Hey Part II is over!
Be back in a bit!
How's It Going
Hey I'm not eating lunch yet because I'm not hungry yet. That settles
that. I will write 5 more paragraphs, though! Then presumably Some
Sort Of TV Watching To Be Done. It's called Being A Productive Adult!
I muck around the exact same as On The Weekend but During The WEEK I'M NOT
DRINKING ALCOHOL WHILE DOING NOTHING. C'mon it's about time I started
acting my age. Also Thursday counts as weekend. I must have picked
that up from college. I think it's pretty universal that 90% of classes
don't haev a Friday. Usually Mon/Wed or Tues/Thurs or Mon/Wed/Thur o
perhaps Mon/Tues/Wed/Thurs. So basically by Thursday Night it's time to
Attend a SuperSpreader event. That's a good practical joke. I
wonder if that's a Hazing thing this year. Fraternities and Sororities are
like ok you wanna join this group? Well you're gonna have to CONCOCT
CORONAVIRUS TO PROVE YOUR DEDICATION.
Which brings to mind what's the easiest, most
efficient way to concoct Coronavirus. Let's say Assuming You Don't
Know Specifically Anyone Who Has It. Just go around BREATHING IT ALL IN?
Also can you be a jerk while doing it and do actions that could spread it to
other people If You Already Happen To Have It? OR do you have to be a
RESPONSIBLE ADULT and only concoct Coronavirus purposely though SAFE FOR SOCIETY
Methods. The point is I forget. Something about Thursdays.
Oh, right. Something I haven't been thinking about in terms of if Trump
wins, is yeah that's a tiny chance I would actually follow through and move to
another country-- but TrumpMerica ruins THE ENTIRE WORLD. There's no way
to run to escape a 2nd Term TrumpMerica. That's scary right? Hah!
Spooked Ya! Uh Oh Now I'm Scared. HOLD ME.
What else is going on and crap. TOKYO JAPAN WON'T
STAND FOR TRUMPS SHIT. JAPAN IS GONNA BREAK OUT IN A BIG WAY ON THE
INTERNATIONAL STAGE. That's MY impression. The good news is I
THINK the majority of Americans are ready to Do The Right Thing. But what
do I know I have no idea. I READ SEVERAL DOZEN POLITICAL/NEWSPEOPLE TWITTERS
I THINK I KNOW A LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT POLITICAL PREFERENCE TRENDS.
And that's not even counting comedians! ...Wait, yes it is.
Oh well such is life. AlsoAlso I live in a place where my
neighbors, as far back as I can remember, DIDN'T seem like total jerks. So
that means No Jerks Anywhere! Anyway the bad (good?) news is I'm getting
solidly into the Not SO Great Era Of The Simpsons but still have a few seasons
of Memorable Pretty GOod episodes. Then there's some years I abandoned it
almost completely, then I resumed,
then stopped again. That's My Simpsons Story. Anyway is one
interpretation of Why Simpsons Are Yellow that they are plagued with serious
serious disease? That would explain a... Not Much. Most of the
time they seem healthy!
Cool! Am I OCDish addicted to refreshing President
Polls? Yeah! Will I try to cut it out? Well I wasn't THINKING
ABOUT IT but now that I mention it YEAH MAYBE I WILL. ...RIGHT AFTER
THESE 3 REFRESHES! Okay got that out of the way. Now lets
get down to the business of finishing this entry. Only 1.75 paragraphs to
go! Joe Biden was (is?) just speaking re: Violence Riots and I watched 2
minutes of it and Hey Look At Him Go He's Being TOTALLY Reasonable And VERY
Competent AND Everything. I LOVE that in a politician. Be reasonable
And Competent! And Everything! I saw the Military Polls show they
support Biden over Trump. Which is good, ya know, in case Trump wants to
use the military to Take Over. I dunno! Maybe the majority of
them would be like WELL I DON'T LIKE HIM I THINK HE'S ABUSING HIS POWER
IN THIS SITUATION SPECIFICALLY BUT HE'S THE CHIEF. Commander In
Chef. Is that a thing?
Probably not. Hey I get to watch TV and
Scroll Twitter for a solid Several Hours. I wonder what I'll watch.
LMLTURQ See Some Good Options. Oh Right #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor.
Almost forgot about THAT Evergreen! Hey there's an episode about
lumberjacks. It was a good one! Evergreens are Trees. Also
a Terrace where Simpsons live. That's about it though I don't think it
means, nope, it doesn't mean anything else. Oh I saw Congress MAY be
decriminalizing marijuana soon! I hope that happens. It's an
EverGreen Positive Issue To Tackle... until its tackled... in a positive
way... then its no longer evergreen... something along those lines. Hey
the entry is over! I'll see you tomorrow.
August 30, 2020
Em Up Time
Did I just have a nice Brunch of One Chicken Finger? YES! I also
had half a cup of coffee but you don't see me bragging about it.
Been a while since I've had a Non-Lite(/Light) Beer. Does it taste
heavier? One would imagine. What is it that's in it more that makes
it 50% more calories? SUGAR? That'd be my guess. You know what
lets just get All Meals For Today Out Of The Way. For breakfast I had a
NON-indulgent breakfast sandwich. Chicken Finger for brunch.
LUNCH'll be Pastrami Sanwich & Soup. Dinner? I DUNNO MAYBE SALMON
AND SOME SORT OF RICE. MAYBE MIX UP LUNCH AND DINNER. ALSO DRINK
SOME BEER. I liked my new conceptualization of I Live Regular Weeks and
drink over the Long Weekend Into Monday so much I was like well why
bother with Monday, then? Just make the Long Weekend That Much More
Drunken'r. Seems to make sense.
Lots o Protests and Violence going on. Protests by The
Majority of people-- The Majority of Good Guys!-- and violence CLEARLY being
egged on and encouraged by The Police (who COMMIT a lot of the violence
themselves when they're not busy simply tolerating and looking the other way
other Right Wing People Violence). But somehow this is gonna break in
Trump's favor? I think we made progress earlier this year on White People
recognizing the plight of African Americans specifically in regards to Police
Violence. Just cause it took a break from being the A #1 Story, then they
started it up again, and are trying to control the framing of the narrative more
this time around, that doesn't mean it'll work. Also when I say
started it up again, I know it's BEEN going on, but I'm thinking of that
dude who traveled across state lines to MURDER PEOPLE and police were friendly
with him. [And I know this is but one example among half of dozens?
Dozens? totally similar cases) But the point is So they have a 2nd
chance to control the narrative this time around, but
I think it's still
pretty clear What's Going On Here to most decent people. And I Leave my
house EVERY OTHER NIGHT to take out the garbage. I think I Know A THING OR
TWO about Your average Decent Pedestrian. Mostly Youngish Asian
American Families walking down the sidewalk, Youngish Parents, Youngish
Children! THEY'RE SMART ENOUGH TO SEE A RACEBAITSCAM WHEN THEY SEE IT.
Whatever. Hey I get to have a sip of alcohol.
I never would have thunk it. I just see it backfiring on Trump more likely
than helping him. People will be reminded hey it felt good to have a
moment of racial unity and understanding and a brief glimpse of hope that we
could go ahead and start maybe changing things for the better. That's
a lot more positive, and you'd-think-more-universal, feeling than Buying Into
Racism. Maybe it's just me. I never bought into racism, but
maybe it's more fun than I'm giving it credit for. The point is made some
real progress watching Kobra Cai: The TV Show: Yesterday. It's pretty
good, but I see there's 2 seasons of 10 episodes each, and I'm at around episode
6 or so of Season I, and they've reached a point i the narrative where All Of
The Conflish introduced has now been settled. There's a brief respite from
any problem. Characters get along, they're doing relatively well in lives,
mostly doing the right thing (and those that are relatively irredeemable in
terms of character and deeds have had their comeuppance.) So I'm guessing
its jut 14 more episodes of Smooooth Sailing for both a New and Improved
Slightly Less Jerky Kobra Cai and a Denial la Russo Household. That's
Karate for you. Daniel La Russo isn't just a river in Egypt.
Hmm makes ya think.
I like that Joke because it implies that the standard way to
refer to The Nile is as if you've got a stereotypical New Yorker accent.
HEY, ITS DA NILE, WHAT A WONDERFUL RIVER OVER THERE OUT IN EGYPT.
Got Five Beers left over until Thursday. Most likely case is All 5 Today.
2 tied for 2nd most likely-- 3 beers today 2 tomorrow, 4 beers today 1 tomorrow.
Then fourth most likely thing is I don't have any beer at all I've just been
drinking imaginary beer all this time and am Very, Very Confused What's Going On
Is The Point I'm Trying To Make. Also at some point people have to
realize This Violence Isn't What Would Happen In Biden's America But In Trump's
America because It Is In Fact Happening In Trump's America. I know I'm the
10,000th person to make that point, but I feel at some pople it's gotta
breakthrough to your average Joe America. Can't be calling people
Average Joes in the age of Joe Biden. Need a new name. At some
point The Violence Literally Happening Under Trump (and him Encouraging More
Explicitly!) is going to become obvious to your average Joseph Amer... wait
same problem there. Is there any name that starts with, "J," that has
NOTHING to do with the others. Didn't they call John F Kennedy Joe.
And Joe Bob Briggs Jack. And Jack Palance Jimmy. And James Lipton
Gerald (SIMILAR PHONETICALLY)
Well that paragraph accomplished a lot. My brother's
middle name is Jason. Nah none of the other, "J's," want anything to do
with, "Jason." Oh well such is life. [TRUMP-- ENCOURAGING
VIOLENCE] [CURRENT MEDIA-- TRUMP POINTS OUT BIDEN SHOULD CONDEMN
VIOLENCE]. Eh one day the media'll figure it out and see how Great it
is to be United In Truth Justice and Some Positive Version Of The American Way.
Rather than just be tools. Probably! I have more faith in the
American People catching on and decreasing in overall racism than Press catching
on and decreasing in overall suckitude. I can't wait to see how it all
plays out! Hmm a, "J," is eight points in Scrabble, what's A GOOD WORD
with J. Job. Damnit I don't have any, "O's." Jerk.
That's a fun one I guess I can use my Blank Piece as a K but where's the FUN IN
THAT. How come I couldn't use my blank piece as an, "O," I
dunno I've raised more questions in this paragraph than I've answered.
Reflect On Past Chuckle Em Ups
Aww I got nothin' to say on past chuckle em ups. Such is life.
JRB is Joseph Biden's initials. I remember my Brother complaining on
occasion that his initials weren't anything. Mine are MAK, My Mom is LRK,
my Dad is HWK. My brother is RJK. So basically if you switch up 2
of the letters you get JERK. I can see why he felt he got the short
end of the stick. Hey anything is better than nothing. I'd
rather be JERK than REJK whatever that means. Also its a fun conversation
started! Hey nice to meet you. My brother's initials, you're
gonna get a kick out of this... They're ALMOST JERK without the vowel.
Let me explain... And then my Potential New Best Friend slinks
further and further away. Why she Slinking. What kinda verb is
that. Slinking. I don't get it. You don't get anything!
What was I talking about. Oh. It feels good to Do
The Right Thing Collectively. I mean it's okay I guess to do the
right thing indiviudally. But you get Everyone To Do The Right Thing For
The Most Part? Now we're talking GREAT FEELING. So lets unite behind
and with our BLM Brothers, and other non-violent protesters. Also SOME
Violence is okay. How do you define violence. Is it violence to
smash a window with a brick. Sure sounds like it. WELL THAT'S
WHERE I DRAW THE LINE. The problem is BAD White America sees Black
People Protesting 100% peacefully as an act of violence in and of itself.
Because THEY'RE DUMB AS FUCK EVIL RACISTS AND WE DON'T NEED TO BE FRAMING
THINGS AROUND THEIR OWN PERSONAL DUMB ASS MINDSET. Both because They Suck
and because They're A Very Distinctly Small Minority Of People. Right?
Anyway I'm A Hero because On My Computer I'm PROTESTING.
Anyway I have an idea for movie its called Fight Club II. And this time
around the gimmick is they divide into teams of people who may tend to have
beefs. Like in OZ: The Prison Drama. They shake hands at the end of
the math and everything, but for the most part they really get into the spirit
of specifically Fighting People From Other Backgrounds And Lifestyles than
yours. Sounds like a nice dumb spin off but it's Smart in how
Dumb it is. Fight Club II: This Time Its Personal.
Which may be an allusion to the surprise ending where this time it turns out
EVERYONE was the same person. ALL OF EM. EVEN THE SETTINGS AND STAGE
That makes a lot of sense. Too much sense!
Anyway, I dunno what else is going on and crap. Is it just me or is it
natural to ponder I wonder what Tyler Durden REALLY looked like, Edward
Norton or Brad Pitt. I think first instinct is Edward Norton, right?
Then there's always the option He's Just Some Other Guy, doesn't look like
EITHER of them, it makes sense thematically that He'd Have No Idea What He Looks
Like! So THAT'S SOMETHING TO CONSIDER IS THE POINT. Anyway,
don't think I gotta leave the house for anything this upcoming week.
Unless my Mom needs cigarettes. In which case I hope it's Monday-Wednesday so I
could get myself 2 beers myself. Thursday Onward I'd already have beer and
I'd look like a real RJEK to just go ahead and re-up on beer when I already have
Cool. I assume before Kamala Harris speaks at rallies
(I think they're going some events over the next few months? Maybe not
full fledged rallies but SOMETHING) anyway the point is her theme song is
Oxford Comma by The Vampire Weekends. Can w call her, Kama for
short? Can we call her Kam for EVEN SHORTER? And can we just make a
Kuh sound LIGHT ON THE uh. Mrs Harris sounds about right.
Hey I had a Kindergarten Teacher who went by Mrs. Something. What a
coincidence! JOE-KAMALA. JOE-KA. JO-Kuh. Hey
its a Joke that's their campaign promise FINALLY SOMETHING TO GET VERY
EXCITED ABOUT. Anyway I've been getting into the spirit of Karate
Kid The TV Show But, in the abstract, I'd still like NEVERENDING #TALESFROMTHECRYPTSUMMERTOSHRIEKFOR.
You can't argue with a FEELING. I'll be back in a bit!
Em Ups: Fact Or Fiction?
I've been wearing glasses today instead of contacts. Or, should I say
NOT wearing glasses HALF THE DAY. Both are accurate! In general,
colloquially, I've been wearing glasses. But half the time I'M WEARING
NOTHING I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF ME.
Just going by INSTINCT at this point! I think they should develop some
sort of Super Technology that lets us choose Which Universe Path we want to go
down. Let's assume that there's infinite universes where infinite things
are happening. We should get to be like ALRIGHT I WANT THAT
UNIVERSE HOOK ME UP! Not really. Crappy Universe is one of
the joys of life! Will we learn to Make The Most And Do The Most We Can
With Crappy Universe? I for one can't wait to find out!
Yeesh. I always tought of multi-verses/time being
multidirectional/all that jazz connected to Playing Guitar. String Theory,
right? It's all String Theory per my Very Limited Understanding of
Theoretical Physics. Guitars got strings. Six Of Them!
Seems like Guitars are a gateway to another reality is the point I'm trying to
make. I'm not TRYING to make it. I'm making it BY ACCIDENT.
Wasn't the point if this rant at all it just SHOWED UP. Isn't
EVERYTHING Strings Nowadays. Well, ya can't argue with that! I
wouldn't know where to start! Not an expert on theoretical physics or
anything! Anyway The karate Kid TV Show is pretty good. It's
solidly past Mediocre and into the Good Side of Adequate. But its hard for
me to relate to these characters, especially the young ones. Wait waht
there's these teenagers that interact with each other and are friends or foes or
have intimate relationships? DOESN'T REGISTER WITH ME ONE BIT.
And it's too late to go back now! I try to go back to high school ALA
Billy Madison to form meaningful connections with people and SUDDENLY I'M
THE WEIRDO? What kinda dumb world are we living in!
What else is going on and crap. Definitely lookin like
a Skip Lunch kinda day. Dinner could reasonably be in Only Two
Hours! Fascinating. Best thing I can do is start working on
music again. I could still write crazysheet. Doesn't have to be one
or the other. On the other hand Music is hard have you head about thie
Strings on guitar? You hold it down on one end, pluck it on the other end,
and you keep doing that but you move around your hands and fingers And Somehow
Its Supposed To Make Musical Sense? I'M NOT BUYING IT. Meanwhile
Crazysheet is EASY you just type words and get in the zone where its like
this is Dumb. FUNNY Dumb. And that's it, that's all there is
to it. And 1/2 the time it's NOT Funny Dumb but it's Dumb Enough thats
Funny Dumb. That sort of thing, what was I talking about again.
Cool! Anyway 2 drinks in so far today, starting a
3rd one. That should last me at the very least through the rest of th
entry. Unless I do a Part IV. Which would be a HUGE Mix Em Up.
I've settled into this 3 Part Entry Schematic for, what, 2 months? Four
months? A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT NUMBER OF MONTHS? Nobody can say for
certain. Sometimes I listen to Fountains of Wayne and I feel bad about how
That Guy Died From Coronavirus. It was always one of my favorites even if
I never realized it. The Band. Not the virus. But yeah, jeez.
I dunno what else is going ona nd crap. I'm not gonna write a Part IV.
What kinda chump you take me for. I feel bad for these college kids
who were conned into Enlisting for A Semester of College that they'd be able to
dorm As Long As Their Careful. What kid ISN'T gonna sign up for that.
And in what universe would that NOT lead to certain SuperSpreading.
Colleges were DICKS to set that up to take their money and then cancel Live
Right? Yeah. On the other hand I've also had the
thought Hmm wonder if I could get in At A Discount to some really Top Level
Ivy League College. I don't have the GRADES but they may have EXCESS
ROOM so something could be figured out, right? Well, not now. Too
late for now. Also I DON'T WANNA RISK MY HEALTH. OR GO BACK TO
COLLEGE. I ALREADY HAVE AN UNDERGRAD DEGREE. A lot of this is just
theoretical! All of it is! On another level, though, I think its
kinda cool! I can relate to Freshmen College Students on a level I
rarely can because This Year's Generation isn't Partying Hearty At Least Not
Yet And/Or Have Been But Will Be Shut Down Soon. WELCOME TO MY
LIFE. Anyway I dunno I'm not gonna write a part IV but I'll do an
extra paragraph or two.
Cool! It may just not have manifested yet, but I'm
surprised there hasn't been more Suspicious Deaths By Covid. You got
someone you wanna take out? Give him Covid! Solid Single Digit
percent chance he'll die especially if he's older. And he probably IS
older. You need to have a good amount of time on this Earth to make an
enemy so dead set on killing you! Now that I've put that idea out there I
implore you don't kill people by Covid. Well the point is the entry
is just about over. Maybe watch some TV on the Computer. Which is my
Sequel Band to TV on The Radio. Was that ever a thing. I feel
like I saw that once when I was a kid. Where they just broadcast TV shows,
audio only, on Standard Radio. LMLTURQ. Yep seems to check out.
Glad we finally got THAT covered. I'll see you guys later.
August 29, 2020
Know What That's Like
Anyway I didn't know what to say about Chadwick Boseman so here's what I came up
with. I Wonder If The C List, Practically Fringe, WWF Wrestler Big
Boss Man was related to Chadwick Boseman. I dunno. Internet
says that's not how its pronounced. On the Chadwick side. Boze
Man, Internet says. I dunno maybe THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON but
we've just been pronouncing Big Bossman wrong. Also I met Big Bossman!
When I got my Mankind autograph, there were two other wrestlers there, too-- BIG
BOSSMAN and... uhh... I forget. Was there ever any controversy that
Chadwick Boseman played a role in creating a fictional African country when the
firt syllable of his name was an ALREADY EXISTING African country? My
guess? Sure probably That's What Producers are for to CONSIDER that
Anyway Its Super Human stuff to make all those leading
roles while having Colon Cancer? That's MY guess. I couldn't even
play those roles WITHOUT the cancer. Plus, I couldn't even HAVE cancer
EVEN WITHOUT the Successful Big Time Acting. If he died roughly a year ago
he'd be 42 and people would be like HEY WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THAT. That
settles That Conversation About That Super Hero's Life and Death.
He almost died at the same age as the number of a movie he was in.
Reallllly makes ya think. I can't help but think that if he didn't have
Colon Cancer he wouldn't have lost that First Battle against the Antagonist in
Black Panther: The Search For Curly's Gold. He'd have knocked this
guy's block off from the start. Oh, right. Spoiler Alert.
City Slickers I and II are on some streaming service I can watch at some
point. The Secret's Out!
Cool. What's a fiction where there's a black cowboy.
Obviously there's the black Sheriff from Blaze Them Saddles. Also
What is a cowboy. He's a guy who keeps the herd of cows Rounded Up
and Not Escaping, right? But we just say some kind who lived in the
west, preferably using violence here and there, that's a cowboy. I'll
LTURQ. Yep I got the Accurate Definition right. Dunno how
that bleeds over into Violent Fighters Who Do Exciting Stuff. I've seen
OVER A DOZEN westerns with, "Cowboys," and never are they like Hold tha
thought gotta round up these cattles. I'll duel with ya in a minute THIS
HERD NEEDS TENDING. That reminds me of something my Dad has said to be
several times over the past few months, by chance I think, or maybe it's just
really on his mind. I don't get, he says, it always confused me
how come there's never any scenes of people using the bathroom in movies.
Doesn't Everybody Need To Use The Bathroom At Some Point?
Also NO he's not going senile he's said that to be before
I'm pretty sure, and it's not totally out of character for him to say stuff like
that the entire time I've known him. And he's not like SO CONFUSED that he
REALLY doesn't get it. I think part of him grasps the concept of
it is both not important to the narrative of this movie AND not something people
want to see in general. But anyway That's Where I Get It From.
What else is going on and crap. Anyway for lunch, I'm leanin towards
finishing my 1.5 Buffalo Flavored Chicken Fingers with some Spanish Flavored
Spanish Rice. But a Sandwich & Soup is a solid backup still very
plausible. Anyway, I dunno, what else is crap. I can I can
picture that in Westerns. Guys are trying to transport a herd of cattle
from point A to point B. I was just imagining, earlier in this entry,
guys who TEND to a herd of cattle EXISTING IN THE SAME PLACE. Which is a
snooze. Trying to Transport a herd? I dunno that sounds like a
A hassle and a half! Anyway what else is going on and
crap. I saw FORTY TWO in theaters. I found it OKAY. I watched
BLACK PANTHER during my #MarvelSummerToRemember. I ENJOYED IT on some
levels MORE THAN ANY OTHER #MarvelSummerToRemember film! On some levels
not as good but THOSE LEVELS AREN'T IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW. The important
thing is It Was Clearly The Best #MarvelSummerToRemember FILM but in terms of
Spectacle some of the other #MarvelSummerToRemember MOVIES had a bit more.
Anyway. My Mom had Colon Cancer 16 years ago, not sure what stage, but man
oh man the state she was in, she couldn't carry a movie IF HER LIFE DEPENDED ON
IT. Anyway. I'm starting to realize The Weeks I Live Are Pretty
Standard. If I'm basing it around alcohol consumption-- I start on
Thursday, have 3-4 drinks a day through Sunday, then have whatever is left over
on Monday. I drink during the weekend. The Long Weekend. And a
bit of the hair of the dog that sniffed me on Monday. Makes sense.
MAKES TOTAL SENSE. I'LL BE BARK IN A BIT!
Know What's Going On
I couldn't even HAVE colon cancer. Forget about Making Movies.
If you were like well you got colon cancer I'd be like well fuck that
shit and.. die or something... I dunno? I WOULDN'T LIKE IT VERY MUCH
is the point I'm trying to make. Also being a cowboy SHOULD be
emasculating because you'd probably eternally be like Cow MAN.
I'm A COW MAN WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST ON DEMEANING ME.
Something along those lines I guess is the point I'm trying to make.
Looking forward to August Ending and September Starting. It's nice to have
a nice fresh slate in terms of What Month It Is! #MarvelSummerToRememberBigBossBoseman
I guess a special commemorative Hashtag. Either for today, or I stick with
it indefinitely for a brief amount of indefinitely, or I stick with it
indefinitely in the sense that it becomes more or less Permanent Hash Tag.
What would Chadwick Boseman have wanted Other Than A Different Name.
Chadwick. Sounds like a NERD. Or a butler. Butlers can
be nerds. I forgot what I was talking about.
What else. Gotta imagine they'll recast Black
Panther instead of eliminating his character, right? Is Denzel
Washington's Son a possibility? What about Will Smith's son. Hmm
what Son of a Successful African American Actor would fit the role of Black
Panther... One would imagine there's a wealth of GREAT Black Actors
NOT known at least partially for their lineage. I dunno I'm gonna have
to look into that one. I don't think Chadwick Boseman was given enough
to do in the last 2 Avenger Ensemble Movies. THERE I SAID IT.
Maybe they wanted to give him a break because HE HAD CANCER. I dunno I
don't have all the answers! Anyway I ahd some delicious Meatloaf last
night. I find that's my favorite meal of the week for the most part.
Meatloaf Night! It's good because it TASTES GOOD and its good for you
BECAUSE I ONLY EAT TWO SLICES NOT SIX. Right! Also it's a good Home
Cooked Meal Fresh & Whatnot that isn't time consuming to cook at all. Just
slide that sucker in the oven, come back in 45 minutes, Dunzo!
Anyway, great, what else is going on. Trump gettin' a
bit of a bounce post RNC convention based on 2 polls. TWO polls?
I Don't Like The Sound Of That. But anyway what else is going on and
crap. Basically the consensus of Polls from the last few weeks has Biden
at around 50-51.5% of the vote, and Tump at around 41-43% of the vote.
I like those odds because its easy to fantasize about it being like, Hmm 51%
committed To biden... 7% left over... go out of our way to give Trump 5.5%,
Biden 1.5%, like a worst case scenario, and he's pretty much bordering on a lock
at that National Vote Discrepancy. 52.5-47.5? THAT'S A SPICY
LEAD. Of course that's not how polls work but its FUN to IMAGINE!
FUCK I BET CHADWICK BOSEMAN HASN'T HAD A CHANCE TO VOTE BY MAIL YET.
#MailInIalsElectionToRemember&RememberToVoteBeforeYouDie. HEY YEAH
maybe he did vote, its not like he didn't see it coming! I Forget what
I was talking about.
Cool! Its amazing the REAL Jackie Robinson
outlived Chadwick Boseman. No it isn't. That's totally
inaccurate. Where would I even get that idea. I Dunno IT JUST
FELT RIGHT! Anyway. What kind of TV would Chadwick Boseman want
me to watch for the rest of the day. Dealer's Choice! My
first instinct is he'd want me to watch a #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor.
Then next possibility is... I dunno... I'm getting a REAL #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor
Suggestion Vibe from his Fake Astral Spirit that may or may not be visiting me
AT THIS VERY MOMENT. Well, You're The Boss! Of one place.
It was called Wakanda. The old king is dead long live the king.
What's the population of Wakanda. And Can I run for King? Oh
sure I can. I just have to challenge Some Other Prospective King to a Fist
Fight. Better start workin on my training for that. I dunno what
I'm talking about. HMmm Wakanda lost its leader. I'm sorry to
say it doesn't affect me as much as it might You. I don't even LIVE
Jeez. What a wonderful day in the neighborhood.
I watched the Mr Rogers Tom Hanks Vehicle and Meh. Maybe it would
have resonated more if I had ever watched The Mr Rogers Mr Rogers Vehicle.
The original show. That sort of thing. Before my time! Its
a wonderful day in the neighborhood. Won't you be my neighbor.
I DUNNO THAT's A HUGE COMMITMENT. Hundreds of thousands of
dollars to buy the house, an entire upheaval of my life, I HARDLY KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT YOU... you're asking a lot. That's the point I'm trying to make.
I think I have SALMON to finish for a lunch. That's another good
possibility. Assuming I Still have SALMON to finish for a lunch. I
feel like I most likely do. Finished Half Spheres of Potato. Still
some rice left. Soup. THOSE ARE THE SIDES AVAILABLE TO ME.
I'll be bark in a bit.
It's Still Today
remember that guy that everyone liked that was around for a while? He's
not around anymore. Yep that's how it goes. We all die.
And most of us aren't even Beloved while we're around! Was he a good
actor? I DON'T REMEMBER. HIS MOVIES WERE GOOD I WILL SEE THEM
AGAIN. AND AT THAT POINT I WILL BE LIKE AH CHADWICK *NERD COUGH NERD*
BOSEMAN WAS A FINE ACTOR WE LOST HIM TOO YOUNG. But for now I don't
know what to say! I wish I felt worse. I think that's a
description of what I feel. I don't know if it's a race thing.
I think it might be. But either way maybe part of it is Life Is Hell and
maybe he's got something figured out that we haven't, what with shaking loose
off this mortal coil and whatnot. MAYBE IF I HAD JUST ONE MORE
BLACK PANTHER MOVIE. ONE MORE FOR THE CANON AND HE'D BE GOLDEN. I
blame #MarvelSummerToRemember. DANMIT I WOULD HAVE BEEN HAPPY HAPPY WITH
ANOTHER BLACK PANTHER MOVIE IN REAL LIFE AND NOW THAT'S NEVER GONNA
Anyway late lunch today gonna be a Frenched
Bread Pizza. It's what Black Panther would have wanted. Gotta
imagine Black Panther liked Pizza. Everyone likes pizza. Here's a
caricature of Black Panther eating an oversized slice of pizza. I
think I'm more upset over losing Black Panther And/Or Jackie Robinson And/OR
etc, than losing Chadwick Boseman. Because I'm an IDIOT and a JERK
and I don't know WHAT TO MAKE OF FILM AND LOSING FILM ACTORS AND WHATNOT.
How the hell do you survive for four years with cancer and are working long days
shooting movies and doing press and etc AND NO ONE FUCKIN' EVEN REALIZES IT?
HOW THE FU... WHAT THE... THAT'S FUCKING CRAZY!!! Maybe that's the ANGLE
I'm looking for on this man's death. Dude was Strong As Fuck re:
Cancer. Why do I need an angle. FOR MY NEWSLETTER.
CRAZYSHEET.NET: THE ZINE. I NEED TO PROVIDE CONTEXT ON THE LATEST
WHEELINGS AND DEALINGS OF HOLLYWOOD.
I forget if I came up with this joke, or if I heard someone
speaking it into a tape recorder Pre: Open Mic so he'd remember this joke he
thought of, but the joke was something along the lines of Black Panther,
sure, the only black super hero and they need to call him, "Black," in his hame.
Or Both. Maybe I thought of it then I heard it. And at the time I as
like hey that's not so bad. And in retrospect yep pretty shitty
joke Doesn't Even Bring Me CLOSE To The Brink Of Amusement. But the
piont is yeah it was probably this other guy LETS BLAME HIM FOR THE CRAPPY
JOKE. YOU KNOW WHO I'm TALKING ABUOT. HE WAS SITTING IN THE CORNER
OF THE ROOM PRE OPEN MIC WHEN I WAS THE ONLY OTHER ONE THERE ALREADY. You
know the guy! Anyway pizza is coming up soon! I like
the sound of that. Taste, too. Texture is fine. But SOUND
that's the key part, right? Anyway.
What else is going on. I'm an idiot and its totally
inconsequential to the story, but I keep going back to I assume Marvel/Disney
must have known he had Colon Cancer, right? That odds were he wouldn't be
Black Panther for the next one and a half decades? Either way NO
JUDGEMENT. That's HIS information. But if he did share it WHAT AN
HONEST DUDE, TOO! Anyway my Hot Take is we need a NEW Super Black Super
Hero. Not recasting Black Panther. Come up with some new Guy And/Or
Gal! My other hot take is Now that I've started this French Bread Pizza
I'm Not That Hungry. Maybe have the Antagonist in Black Panther: The
Film turn into a good guy. That's an easy narrative to form.
Unless if he died at the end of Last Movie. I don't think he did but
there's a solid 20-25% chance he did. Promote Black Panther's Sister.
Another interesting option.
I saw support for BLM protests is dropping among White People
and I'd like to take this opportunity to Identify As A White Person While
Concurrently Virtue Signaling that BLM PROTESTS ARE THE SHIT THEY HARDLY EVER DO
VIOLENCE AND THEY ARE PROTESTING FOR THE WORTHIEST OF CAUSES. I'd go out
and march but ya know I Don't Like Coronavirus for my parents. Also I'm
jealous as fuck of the haircut my Dad gave himself. At first I was like
yeah looks stupid but it IS a LITTLE NEATER at least. Then I was like
yeah its not your style but it IS NEAT. Then I was like Hmm still
not your style but looks good actually. And now I'm at I WANT THAT
HAIRCUT HOW CAN I DO IT WITHOUT LEARNING HOW TO DO IT TO MYSELF. MAYBE
MAGIC CAN ACCOMPLISH THIS HAIRCUT?
One bonus paragraph and then we're calling it a day.
Pretty rare we see a Hollywood Movie where the protagonist is black but not an
African American. I can think of this, the one with Mandela, and I feel
like some other South African at some point once. What would they call me
in terms of Racial Groupings if I moved to Africa (including and/or excluding
South Africa). An American African? White Guy. Hey Check Out
This White Jew Dude. Yep that one is it. They will hopefully
call me, "Hey Check Out This White Jew Dude." So dinner tonight
is probably Soup & Sandwich most responsible thing to do. Did Mr. Big
Bossman have a family. I saw briefly when I skimmed wikipedia he married
in like 2019 (and Iw as like wooooah that's gotta be a trip for both Him and His
Wife considering his health). Did he have CHILDREN? Doesn't look
like it. Just marriage. We wish his Black Widow the best of luck.
Can't stop the entry there can I? Yes I
better make SURE his widow was black otherwise Suddenly I'M THE ASSHOLE?
Yep appears to be black. So that all checks out and whatnot.
If I found out I had a fatal form of cancer I'd just spend the rest of my days
Cursing God Out in my had. Just 24/7 when I'm awake. YOU FUCKING
PIECE OF SHIT GOD OOOO I'M SO GREAT I'M GONNA GIVE MICHAEL CANCER WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU THINKING YOU PIECE OF SHIT OH BOY WHEN I DIE AND GO TO HEAVEN I AIN'T
LETTIN UP YOU'RE GONNA HEAR ABOUT THIS NON STOP YOU CRAP EXCUSE FOR A BENIGN
DEITY YOU. Something along those lines, right? Figure that's a
productive way to spend my last Years. Anyway had a nice late lunch, gonna
have a nice late dinner presumably! I like those odds. I'll see you
guys again tomorrow for some reason no one is really sure of.
August 28, 2020
Lookin' At You
Absolutely. Got up Right Early today. We're talking 8 AM, 8 15
AM or so. You know what that's like. It's like hey This Is The
Worst Time Of The Day To Be Awake. If you're asleep-- ACES, it's one of
the best times to be asleep. If you're awake? Either you just
got out of bed WITH LITTLE SLEEP or you've been up all night and you've already
Gotten The Most You Could Get out of the novelty of it being Morning Next Day.
It's morning next day SEVEN AM, maybe even SIX AM if you're lucky. 8:30
The Next Day? Best case scenario is its now time to go to sleep, WORST
CASE SCENARIO GOTTA GO TO WORK. But Sleeping at 8:30, That's
The TOPS! I feel very strongly about this. Anyway had some
trouble uploading Website To Internet yesterday afternoon After Writing Entry.
But fter 3 hours I FIGURED IT OUT. That's a relief.
Without Entry Being On Internet How Am I Supposed to,
"Do," Life? Makes no sense. The point is I got up early to get
Bloodwork done. I assume it was/is being/will be done. They took
blood outta me. Now the balls in their court. Also I gave a
urine sample. I was asked! I didn't insist on it or anything.
Lookin' like Dinner Tonight'll be Communal Meatloaf with Half Potato Spheres.
Lookin' like Lunch Afternoon'll be finish Last Night's Communal Roast Chicken.
With SPANISH RICE AS A SIDE I'M RUNNIN LOW ON THEM HALF SPHERES. THAT'S
RIGHT I'M BACK TO SPANISH RICE. I think I can, "Dig," it Once More.
Anyway how many Superbowls are we into in regards to American Coronavirus
Deaths. ~3 SuperBowl Total Annihilations, right? Possibly more
depending on the size of the stadium and the amount of crew and coaches
accompanied by each team. And whether to count the Lockers and Weight
Equipment and Jacuzzis As People. Which, I don't see why you WOULDN'T.
They're an important part of the team.
Anyway, what else is going on. Hey today's Regular
Friday. Which, now that I think about it, corresponds pretty well with New
Friday. The rest of the days get mixed up but Friday Is Still Friday.
That reminds me of a lyric or something. I'll think about it. First
thought was the Who meet the new boss same as the old boss
but no I don't think that's what I'm thinking of. Ooooh Second thought was
the Belle and Sebastian song the blues are still blue. That
very well may have been it! Glad we got that covered. What else is
going on. Hey I can watch Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Spin Off: On a
Platform I Can View: Netflix. I watched the first half dozen episodes on
YouTube PRIME but now its time for NETFLIX to shine. I dunno that
sounds PRETTY GOOD but not #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor Good.
Cool. Man I can't get enough of those meatloafs.
Maybe I should push my Mom down a flight of stares so I could have her portion.
I'd have to do it AFTER Meatloaf was made but before she started eating it.
If I do it Too Soon I'd look like a jerk for Starting The Meatloaf.
However, if the Meatloaf is already done, I'd be a jerk to NOT eat it.
Also I kinda like my Mom I don't want her falling down ANY sort of states no
matter WHAT the immediate benefits I would reap. In the process of
re-aligning my Upload Website To Internet Game, I considered splurging some
money to be able to see Web Statistics. Like, TOTAL VIEWERS, Where Viewers
come from (ON EARTH OR Where they came from FROM INTERNET), DemoGRAPHICS,
etc. But it's not worth it because I don't got money like that to burn!
I don't have any money to burn! I have some loose change but that don't
Anyway. Air Conditioning started working again which is
Great! We spent over all 1 or 2 thousand dollars over the course of 4 or 5
visits from Air Conditioning People and they looked around, DID THEIR THING, and
it looked like we'd have to spend thousands of more to Replace, but it got
fixed! Plus, it's Fall in three weeks, so We're GOLDEN. Unless
Summer Heat comes back around next year. Which is pretty likely now that I
think about it. Told my Mom and Pop about wanting to donate to
Biden-Harris. They were like they have people donating to them already.
Why you so eager to get rid of 20 dollars. And I was like BECAUSE
IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO YOU IDIOTS. So we'll see how
that turns out. I think I'd be less embarrassed to donate 20 dollars and
Get Nothing Back than donate 7.5 dollars and Get Two Big Stickers Back.
We'll see how this situation develops as... well, like I said, as it develops!
Right! I definitely donated to Obama/Biden 2008 cause I
got a shirt. I'm pretty sure I donated to Clinton/Kaine in 2016 because
that's what Memory is telling me and why would Memory lie It'd Have No Motive.
Definitely Donated to Bernie Sanders last 2 primaries. I think that's
about it. I think my Mom's biggest problem is The slogan Build Back
Better. So maybe that's where you should START Building Back Better.
The slogan. Build that slogan back a little bit better. It's THE RIGHT
THING TO DO. Biden had a nice 1 full point jump in National Election
Poll this morning. Will I keep you updated on this situation as it
progresses indefinitely? I dunno I kinda hope not! I was thinking
about it (I THINK? Maybe I Heard it from CNN IN MY SLEEP FROM DOWNSTAIRS?)
and the last VP to become president was George H.W. Bush. We kinda take it
as a political inevitability but it's been a while! FASCINATING.
Anyway. #PushTrumpDownTheStairs2020. That's a Campaign Premise
I Could get behind.
Smellin' Someone Else
re-watching The Fly: The Jeff Goldblum Vehicle last night for only the 2nd or
3rd time. Ya know what? GREAT MOVIE! I mean It Makes Ya
Think, it's got some spook-em-ups, a nice amount of gross-em-ups, its well
acted, written IT JUST IT IS WHAT IT IS. Can I start using that
phrase myself over and over. Until people forget it was associated with
Others before me. I like the idea of that. Stealing is Nature's
Creativity! Anyway yeah that was a fun movie! Anyway I was able to
avoid 95-98% of RNC Convention Speakings which I consider a victory. I
don't wanna hear that stuff. KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.
Anyway, hey, great. BIDEN UP A POINT NATIONALLY
BUT A REAL BAD INDIVIDUAL POLL IN MICHIGAN? WELL I GUESS LIFE IS
FULL OF GOOD AND BAD. Whatever. You guys gettin' your votes
together? You should be! You don't wanna be blocked out of #MailInialsElectionToRemember
completely. At this point IT'S A MATTER OF WEEKS WE'VE GOT. A SOLID
DIGIT OF WEEKS. AND WE CAN'T TRUST USPS LIKE WE USED TO DO C'MON NO TIME
TO WASTE. Anyway, what was I just watching that was, OH RIGHT. I was
gonna say that was Ancient Egypt, and it was the 1/3rd of the Simpsons Bible
Stories episode where Millhouse is Moses. And it reminded me of going to
the Orthodontist. Because they had a Sega Genesis (MAN OH MAN IF ONLY IT
WERE CALLED A SEGA EXODUS) which you could play ALADDIN on. For 40
seconds. Similar Setting! I've told you about this Sega
Genesis that resets every 40 second. Pretty traumatizing experience!
I'll tell you again later.
Wow. If I tweren't to have Meatloaf tonight I'd have a
more Beef-based Meat Or Something for lunch. Like a Sandwich or something.
But I Can't DOUBLE DOWN ON BEEF. What kind of idiot do you take me for.
Variety is the spice of life and that's my motto. Sometimes. I've
got some other mottos I go through. You know, Spice Of Life, and Whatnot.
Jeez. Sometimes I try to think of ways to Mix Up My Life, but its hard to
think of new things I can do, so basically the only ways to mix up my
life is to remove things. Say I remove this website. I don't
WANT TO but its 1 option. Stop watching porn. That's another thing I
don't WANT TO but man oh man would that be mixing things up. Presumably
when Quarantine of over I can do Productive Mix-em-ups. Outside stuff and
whatnot. And outside my house but inside other structure Stuff And
whatnot. Yes Yes it appears Website and Jerking Off to
Pornography are the main two things I got going.
I've gotten pretty bad at No-porn jerking off over the
years. Used to be a joy. Honestly, used to be Even better! I
had a great imagination. Now I can't be bothered. Can't SOMEONE
ELSE tell/show me what to be thinking about. That's MY Hot Take.
Plus when you're using porn its a SHARED EXPERIENCE welcome to THE HUMAN RACE.
Sounds about right. I can't wait to see Biden do some Nice Speeches
again. That's honestly how impressed I was with his DNC CONVENTION Closing
Speech. I'd like to hear more does he have a newsletter I could subscribe
to? That'd be a good way to Donate money AND get something back
in return. I could order a Coffee Mug but I have too many Mugs I like.
White Castle and Bernie Sanders. How many Coffee Mugs can ONE MAN CYCLE
THROUGH? Hmm.... Joe... That's what coffee is called sometimes...
#CupOfJoe2020... come back to me on this. Also do you need to wear a
Cup on the Campaign Trail? You never know when someones gonna come up and
kick you in the balls! Best be prepared would be my instinct.
Looks like Jacob Blake is surviving AND is mentally,
"There." Based on the little I know. Hero! And like I said
Using Legs is overrated YOU'LL LOVE THIS WHEELCHAIR LIFESTYLE C'MON GET IN THE
SPIRIT OF THINGS. That ain't no good. True. Except for
the potential impotence, I think being in a wheelchair wouldn't be THAT bad.
Inconvenient getting onto Higher Floors of buildings and whatnot. And by
inconvenient I mean sometimes Impossible. But yeah I think
wheelchair people can't Get it up and/or feel it really even if they can.
And that's NO BUENO. But the good news is, We Love You and We Can't Wait
For You To Recover! Yep now He reads this website. That's what I'VE
gotten out of this story. Hmm. He's a man. I'm talkin' at
him like he's a kid. Maybe 16, 18. HE DON'T NEED MY CODDLING.
I've given myself a lot to think about.
Cool! Anyway another break after this
paragraph. Still early in the day. Most days the last week or two,
I'd have not even started Entry yet. Hey it's September in a few days.
August hasn't been my Best Month of Crazysheet but it's been SOLID. A
SOLID 3 out of 5 in general. You know what that means!! POSSIBLY
ROUND UP TO A PASSING 65% THAT'D BE MY INSTINCT AS BOTH A STUDENT AND A TEACHER.
Pretty sure I'll Hold ON To Karate Kid TV Show for a day or two. Not in
the mood Right Now and Right Now is a pretty good indicator of Right Now (Going
Forward Lets Say For The Rest Of The Day). The Whole Day is Right Now.
Right? Seems about right. Not hungry for lunch yet but that's
another area where being an hour or two Ahead Of The Game pays off. I
could have a later lunch, relatively and whatnot! In the mean time though,
I'll be back in a little bit.
Distance Are Positive Taste Tests
What's a positive taste test. Is it when you taste something that
tastes good, or if you taste something and then accurately can identify what it
is/what is in it. I've raised more questions than I've answered this
fourth of a paragraph or so. Maybe I will watch Cobra Kai today.
It IS scary because I ALREADY SAW IT and WHAT IF SOMETHING NEW HAPPENS.
I can't even CONTEMPLATE the different ramifications such a scenario would
propose. Also I'm starting from Episode 1 Season 1. Also I don't
like Denial La Russo if I remember correctly. Look this other main
character is a jerk. He Was a jerk in the 80's, he's still a jerk now!
But The Karate Kid... sells cars or something... Who Gives A Fig. Mr
Miyagi would be rolling over in his grave. Actually Mr Miyagi loved
cars he has like a dozen Great Cars to give to The Karate Kid on his Karate
Birthday back in the day. So now I think him working in the Car
Dealership Industry is EXACTLY What Mr. Miyagi would have wanted. Scary
Anyway. Not a lot of practical skills for karate.
Isn't it mostly a DEFENSIVE art form? Great, you can't even START
fights, what a jip. I wanna see that opposite of that. All these
Karate Kun Fu etc they're always like The best fight is the one avoided.
This is for defensive purposes only. I wanna see the JERK FIGHTING ART
FORM SPECIFICALLY FOR Antagonizing PEOPLE. You know they'd be
more effective! The use all the Holds that are barred by your more,
"Peaceful," Fighting Art Forms. The good news is there was a period
yesterday where I was like well maybe crazysheet is over. I Dunno
whattado about this. Then I was like oh right TECH SUPPORT forgot
about that. They'll get to the bottom of this. And they did! AND
I GAVE THEM A 9 OUT OF 10 REVIEW. THEY DROPPED ONE POINT BECAUSE I HAD TO
WAIT 20 MINUTES FOR THEM TO FIRST GET BACK TO ME. STILL NOT A BAD GRADE.
Whatever. MAN OH MAN 20 EPISODES OF THIS SHOW.
Close to half an hour an episode per my limited understanding. Did I tell
you about my Pastrami Situation. I had a slice of Pastrami last niht--
Taste Test!-- and it was somewhere between Salami and Corn't Beef. And
that Somewhere is Suuuure Tolerable. Do they ever get into what happened to
Elizabeth Shue? My opinion? Yeah probably. Seems like
they would. It's my understanding that Kai means Yes.
Like you're like KOBRA FORM OF KARATE? YES INDEEEEDY SIGN ME UP.
Kobra? YES. Kobra? YES. LMLTURQ.
Oh. It means, "Organization." So when you're at Kobra Kai you're
at The Karate Department. Also I insist on spelling it, "Kobra," and
not, "Cobra." I think it adds a little bit of flavor and I'm doing them a,
Faaantastic. The closest thing I ever learnt to
Karate was Bowling. I dunno why I thought that would be funny.
However, it did lead me to the more accurate thought, the closest thing I
ever learnt to Karate was Yoga. I took a Yoga class at Queens College!
It was pretty fun on account of that girl in front of me's distinctive thong
under her sweat pants. Hey you put creeps in yoga classes then Creeps
Gonna Creep okay. I didn't STARE at it. I just noticed it FROM
TIME TO TIME. And put my mind on more pressing things like ok how'm I
gonna do this downward dog. Which was just The First Yoga Pose that
came to my mind. Pretty simple one, though. There's tougher Poses
than that! That would require more mental and physical energy.
I'll look into doing more yoga one day maybe I dunno it was pretty cool.
During Yoga Teacher always had some sort of Soundtrack
going from her Boom Box Radio and about 1/3rd of the time, honest estimate, it
was an instrumental version of Time After Time. Go figure!
There must be SOME SORT of offshoot of Yoga that's like Fighting Yoga.
Even if it never caught on. Somewhere over the last few thousand years
people were like how can we incorporate these poses into CREATING AND
PURSUING VIOLENCE AGAINST OTHERS. If I know anything about
Ancient-to-Current Indian culture its that they'd be mining yoga for ways to
Hurt People. Preferably uninitiated!
Hey time for the last paragraph. And I'm only about
1.67 Drinks in! You know what that means. Subtract that from FOUR
and that's how much I have left for the day. Hmmm lemme crunch the
numbers SOUNDS A LOT LIKE 2.33 drinks left to me. II can only wonder
what the next time I leave my house will be. Getting my mom cigarettes?
Lets just hope it aligns with the 2 days before Regular SuperMarket Delivery so
I would seem justfied to get myself a couple of beers. Sounds about like
an ideal situation for 2020 #2020ToRememner. That's a good hashtag.
Doesn't push anything on ya. Just Hey It's 2020 remember. Who knows
why its being left UP TO YOU! Anyway but the real point is
#2020MailInIalsElectionToRemember . I don't CARE if you disagree YOU'D BE
WRONG. I'll see ya tomorrow.
August 27, 2020
Keep That In Mind
Anyway. If you're living in this proto-fascist police state augmented
by Loyal-To-President Made -Up-Militias full of White Nationalists & The Like,
who use violence and kill after BEING EXPLICITLY EGGED ON TO DO IT by the
corporate media and the Top of The Republican Party (including the president)--
and you don't at least acknowledge that's the state we're in, you're a
rube. Not doing anything concrete about it? I dunno! What can
you do. But at least explicitly acknowledge it, right? Otherwise
you're Just Being A Rube. That doesn't mean I think That's Necessarily
where we're headed. People can wake up and see they don't like the track
we're on. But there's no denying that without any meaningful pushback
that's the track we're on. And have been on. And maybe
have always been on despite moments of temporary progress. I'm no
historian I ONLY STUDIED HISTORY SCHOOL FOR 2 YEARS. And most of that was
ELECTIVE CLASSES or REQUIRED CLASSES OUTSIDE THE MAJOR. So if
you wanna talk to m about What was the video to The White Stripes' THe
Hardest Button To Button all about, or if you wanna talk about remember
that time I took a Spanish class Freshman Year, too? Then YES we can
have those discussions.
COMEDY TIME. I mean, I'm not ALL negative about
this. I think if properly prodded and informed American Public will be
like wait a second this doesn't seem right. But THEY MUST BE
PRODDED. Like the LEAST (or MOST?) effective tactic in Worms II: The
Computer Video Game. Basically each team gets 10 worms in an environment
that's 2/3rds underground, 1/3rd over ground, and you have like 40 different
Weapons you can use (its a turn/by/turn game) to deplete the life-health and
ultimately kill entirely the other teams worms. And one of the Most
Nothing Attacks is Prod. You press it and it just prods them over
half a dozen squares. But boy oh boy if the guy is right off a cliff
with nothing below it NOW ITS PRODDING'S TIME TO SHINE. The point is
YES I'd like to play Worms II but what can I do about it? Probably
nothing. That'd be my guess.
The most fun was Napalm. You just have Napalm drop from
the sky and eviscerates 2/3rsd of the entire AboveGround Landscape. And
possible even seeping into Below Ground to eviscerate some of THAT landscape,
too.! Hey this Miller Lite is pretty good. It reminds me of
past times I've drank beer that tastes similar-- possibly Miller Lites! I
don't remember explicitly asking for a Miller Lite at Bar. But maybe there
were situations where I asked what the options were, this was the one that
struck my fancy the most, and then, well, here I Am! Oh, and All The
Supermarket Groceries were delivered. We're talkin' BBQ Salmon w/ rice for
lunch an AN COMMUNAL DINNER tonight, most likely Roast Chicken wi/ Half Sphere
It's FASCINATING. My dad cut his hair last night and
he's not happy about it but I think it actually turned out pretty good.
It's not his Style but it's Neat Enough and is more or less something I'd be
happy with Twere It To Be My Head. New Meat Alert WE'RE TALKIN PASTRAMI.
I told you all about that yesterday. We were talking about Hebrew
Nationals which May Or May even PREDATE the Modern Country of Israel?
LMLTURQ. YEP HEBREW NATIONALS CAME FIRST. As far as I know that
means that they also have a stake to Part Of The Holy Land. There's
Israel, Hebrew Nationals, Palenstinians, about half a dozen more different kinds
of Muslims one would expect. Kurds, right? Gotta be some Kurds that
are like also we didn't wanna say anything but we also kinda want part of
this land. That's what I like about Kurds THEY'RE NOT PUSHY NOT
LIKE THOSE SHIITES. Would SHIA have been a better reference?
I dunno! Hussein was a Shiite, and the Shia were the majority of Iraq
that presumably are in power now, right? I stopped caring about the Iraq
War ROUGHLY TWELVE YEARS AGO. Too much stuff to keep track of, it's NOT
Whatever happened to Darfur. What was going on
there? Hunger? Genocide? War or something? LMLTURQ.
Hmm Some Sort of WAR but now its for the most part subdued. WAR.
GOOD GOD. WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR. HELPED US BEAT THE AXIS OF
EVIL. The ORIGINAL Axis of Evil. Germany, Italy, and Japan.
Not The George W Bush Axis of Evil which I believe was Iraq, France, And The
Dixie Chicks. I'm having a hard time picturing what Donald Trump's Axis
of Evil would be. Let's just cancel out the Obvious Democrats,
Minorities, and Women or something. No, if he had to pick his three
biggest advisories In Countries? Maybe China is in there, but I think he
does a lot of business with China, so that's probably more bluster than anything
else. Let's say China, though. There's MEXICO, that's where
undesirables come from.... I dunno I can't think of any country he
despises more and does mere to sabotage and undermine than America.
That's not a cheap political point. He Hates America and tolerates
Reallllly Makes Ya Think. Not really.
Reallllly brings you to the verge of thinking. Yeah that sounds about
right. The good news is Two of the the Night Time Medications I take I've
been skipping for the past 7-10 days because I ran out of the Bottle I had at
Hand and have been too lazy to Re-up with a bottle elsewhere in the house.
But this time around, I'm RE-UPPING ONE OF TEM. We're talking that
CHOLESTEROL medication. That should get things under control! The other
one, still to be replaced, is one of my anti-depressants. I'm on 2 o 3
anti depressants overall. And twice that including other kinds of mood-stabalizer
anti-pyschotic type crap drugs. I don't think ONE anti depressants
is gonna make a huge deal. But then what do I know my life is worthless
and I shuold just end it all, all of it! I've been feeling this way for
roughly 7-9 days now that I think about it.
Will All be Over Soon
it, though? I dunno depends what, "All," is. If we're talking
about Universe we've got BILLIONS of years to go. That's not so
bad. We've already done 13 billion years! How much more billions can
it be. First thing Google said was about 5 billion years left.
That's nothin, we're way past halfway. We're past TWO THIRDS into The
Universe. Time for a CLIMAX if I know my hero's Journey Narrative as
well as I think I might. As far as we know, the first 13 billion years
Minus 10 or 20,000 years was A COMPLETE SNOOZE. Really just a whole lot of
NOTHIN. I guess any sort of living animals were KIND of interesting but
nowhere near as interesting as SMART GUYS LIKE US HUMANS. I blame
Astronomy for souring people on being enthusiastic about Saving Global Warming.
What if someone was like hey if you don't change your ways THE ENTIRE
UNIVERSE WILL BE UNINHABITABLE Within A Couple of Generations.
You'd be like, WHAT THE HELL EVERYTHING?
Now, us human may be jerks, but We're not THAT MUCH OF JERKS. So the
point is Maybe Earth will Be Uninhabitable but we've been in space 2 dozen
times I'm sure Space is Somehow Inhabitable in a way I don't fully understand
because it's not an accurate point of view in the first place. Human
gotta be the laughingstock of the universe. What kinda dumb species is
somehow smart enough to annihilate itself practically on purpose and in the
blink of an eye but dumb enough to Actually Do It. Humans, that's who!
Surely there's some company over the last billion years of similarly fated
Intelligent-ish Aliens but we're part of the CHUMP group of sorting Alien Life
Forms. No two ways about it. Anyway, what else is going on
What kind of human won't spend $7.50 on two BIG BIDEN
STICKERS when he wants to donate at least that much anyway AND is a fan of
stickers. I just don't look forward to that conversation. Hey
Mom, hey Dad. You might wanna sit down. Spent 10 dollars (WHAT WITH
SHIPPING AND EVERYTHING?) on a couple of stickers. Now, keep calm.
It's to support that candidate for president we're not all that enthusiastic
for. But I think the Stickers will drive up enthusiasm. It's all
part of the same thing. Stickers, money, Joe Biden enthusiasm. It's
What Needs To Be Done In This Particular Moment. So, great, I got that
going for me is the point.
Anyway. Pastrami, eh? HEBREW NATIONAL
Pastrami? My guess is it's halfway between Salami and Corn't Beef.
You can't prove me wrong because you have no avenue or method of conveying your
thuoghts or evidence to me as o this moment. Fine email me at
firstname.lastname@example.org about your
Pastrami thoughts and what it's all about and whatnot. Anyway, been
spendinging the last 2 weeks or so with a #SimpsonsCircleWalkingToGetDizzyBy.
2.5 or 3 episodes a morning! I'm making progress and LAUGHING all the way
there! Unfortunately I'm past the recognized Best Episodes, and am into
territory where I think it's Recognized To Be Pretty Good but Ever Devolving
Into Just Adequate (and/or mediocre if you're a Real JERK Of A CRITIC). So
I got that to look forward to is the point! I can watch ABOUT A BOY its my
favorite movie OF THAT SPECIFIC GENRE (movies About A Boy / movies which
are Exactly The Genre Of What Their Title Says Exactly)
Anyway. Hey hows England doing these days. I
think Their Trump guy, Boris Johnson?, he's still around and treading water.
That's too bad. If England redeems itself that's another good option for
leaving America. It's no TOKYO but it's in the top 12 possibilities
because I Like I Speak That There Language Pretty Good Myself Do I Feel.
Would I feel good abandoning the majority of Americans who are my compatriots
and left to stuffer and be abused? No. But would I feel about about
abandoning MY OWN suffering and abusement? Yeah probably that sounds like
a real nice utopia! UTOPIA, JAPAN, here I COME! That's the point
I'm trying to make or something. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT.
They know that no country will ever have OUR Undesirables, so if they get
America, and we get to leave, then Everyone Ends Up Somewhere! But I
like it here! Specifically New York. New York Is The Tits!
The point is at some point this paragraph made sense I think, lemme go back
to the st... NOPE was nonsense, entire paragraph.
Cool! Anway finished Beer #1. I got that
going for me is the point. I've been all over the USA and its all great.
There's Hershey Park-- that's in Pennsylvania. There's Six Flags Great
Adventure-- that'd be New Jersey. Disneyworld AND Universal Studios in
Florida. There was some... unpleasantness... in Colonial Williamsburg
(Maryland or Virginia? Now I can't remember. Virginia! Now I
CAN remember!) Washington DC had some good stuff going for it. I feel like
we ate at a Hard Rock Cafe the first night we got into DC. Could it have
been a Planet Hollywood? Yeah but I think THAT was in Florida. And
Hard Rock Cafe was in Washington DC. And its a wondeful experience because
it's a Decent Chain Food restaurant BUT YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE STUFF THEY HAVE
HANGING OFF THE WALLS. Also I think they should close down all the
museums, there's NO WAY most of these are turning a profit. National
Holocaust Rememberor Museum? That's gotta be hemorrhaging money like a
mother fucker! And, based on the last few weeks, I am now under the
impression every single specific thing the government is involved in is
specifically to make a profit. So if no ones making money off Me
Remembering The Holocaust, WHAT EVEN IS THE POINT?
Didn't You Say So
only the ANTI-Holocaust Museum was more entertaining WE WOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THIS
MESS. That's my hot take. Anyway gonna have a late lunch in
roughly an hour. We're talkin Salmon + Several HalfSpheres Of Potatoe.
Some more #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor for later today. I can
re-watch the one with Bruno Kirby. I've seen that four or five times in
the last 18 months and I'm still pretty sure I have no idea what
happens/what the twist is. I know there is Foulness Afoot and perhaps some
deception or scamming but I DUNNO THE FACTS I'M GONNA HAVE TO SEE THIS PROBABLY
12, 14 TIMES TO REALLY GET DOWN WHAT'S GOING ON. If only Bruno Kirby
survived to be in more things. Some stars are too bright to shine forever.
I dunno I think I'm making fun of Bruno Kirby explicitly but also I DUNNO
I'D PROBABLY LIKE HIM IF HE PLAYED A KEY PART IN SOME MOVIE I ENJOYED.
I remember Kirby: The Game Boy Character. He's a big cloud who shoots
smaller clouds out of his mouth. As per my recollection.
Anyway, great, just great. What else is going on
today. Almost done with the entry more or less. Just 4 or 5 more
paragraphs to go! Thinking SLIGHTLY more seriously about trying to do some
music. Still way below 50% chance it is imminent. But lets say we're
up to 10% chance music is imminent as opposed to 2%. That's a very
different number if you crunch all the numbers! Hmm. Crunching
numbers. Makes me think of when I sued to get Fast Food Delivered from
DoorDash and would crunch the numbers of calories. So the point is YOU
WANT SOME MUSIC? GET ME SOME CHICKEN NUGGETS AND SUMMER 2008 PROMOTIONAL
ANGUS STEAKBURGER FROM MCDONALDS. That's where I draw the line!
Sounds about right. This is probably obvious to
literally Everyone, but listening to music lately, I'm starting to realize that,
for riffs lets say, they sound totally different, as if in they apply or not, as
per guitar sound. You can have one riff with one guitar Modulation and
then another one with a totally different riff, in a different key, with a
different rhythm, different everything, and they each only sound good in the
Tone they were intended with. This is news to me! Hey I'm
learning though, that's a positive thing though, right? The point is
SURE I'd watch either of The Tales From The Crypts Movies. Preferably
one with Dennis Miller, that'd be my 1st choice. My 2nd choice would be
The Other One: The One Where They're Trapped In A House From Demons.
But first one is DENNIS MILLER I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THIS GUY. If I
consider myself intelligent and I only get 20% of Dennis Miller's references,
what hope do The Rest Of Us Have?
Anyway, 1.5 drinks in, probably stop at 3 for the day.
That way I can have FOUR three of the next four days and THREE the last of the
next four days whether its literally the last CHRONOLOGICALLY or NOT. This
beer does taste better, I gotta say. I ENJOY it instead of TOLERATE it and
you know its true because of all the CAPITAL letters. I have Oh So Many
Tales From The Crypts to watch. Roughly 93! I crunched the
numbers a week ago or so and everything. Starting beer #3.
Does that mean I'll end up with Four overall tonight? I Dunno I can't tell
the future! I can't even tell the present. Past I've got a
RELATIVELY good handle on. Present? I think I'm more solid with
The Future than The Present, let's put it that way.
Cool. Two paragraphs or so to go. Saw Kamala
Harris was speaking downstairs. On TV. On the TV Downstairs.
Not actually in my DEN. But the point is I know I'm a Kamala Harris fan
because when I see/hear her speak and don't immediately recoil. Good
sign! We've got a Den AND a Living Room. Downstairs is, Front
door opens up into Living Room, which is about 40% of Downstairs. There's
also a kitchen and a den. And a bathroom! Bathroom is accessible
from The Kitchen. Also there's a Stairway leading to upstairs but that
brings up a whole new set of things. Hallway. 2 Child Bedrooms, 1 2x
as big as the other, and one big Master Bedroom. Used to live in the Tiny
Childroom. Brother went to University, I moved into HIS room. Now
BOTH rooms are mine. Soon I'm gonna start staking out the living room.
By the time my parents are dead THIS ENTIRE HOUSE WILL BE MINE.
Last paragraph! White 17 year old goes across state
lines to murder African American people. Is canonized on Fox News.
What to be done. Can we get rid of Fox News somehow? Look, I WATCH
the Simpsons. They're always making DIGS at Fox. BUT Maybe now is
the time for action! SIMPSONS ITS TIME TO EITHER BE ALLIES OR ENABLERS YOU
CAN'T WALK THE LINE ANYMORE. Oh wait they're a fictional cartoon sitcom
family. But YOU GET THE POINT. I remember when I was a kid,
first starting to think about Political Issues and whatnot, I pretty much
identified as a libertarian, if not explicitly. We're talkin' from when I
was like 11-13 years old. By the time 2003 came around I was solidly a
Democratic. But I just remember thinking, lets say for Social Security,
well, its my money. Basically the system is set up is they take away my
money and give it back to me later. Can't I just be trusted enough to
decide what to do with my own money? But the fact is A) NO NOT
EVERYONE CAN BE TRUSTED and B) it's not a one-by-one person thing.
Sometimes Individual needs to make sacrifices for the benefit of All People.
So as a KID I could give a fig about other people but I'm an adult who Wants To
Do The Right Thing For People. That's how that goes. Children
only care about themselves. Adults care about other people, too.
Anyway one more bonus paragraph. I dunno maybe watch
that Joe Pesci episode of #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor again I can't get
enough of him! Get this, he plays a fake twin brother of his main
character, and he's always saying stufff lik Groovy or Bodacious
or Other Stuff because his Twin Brother character is from California.
I can, "Dig," That! "BABES." He's always sayin to these women, he's
callin' em, "Babes!" That's Joe Pesci for ya. Whats he been
up to lately. One would imagine he's still alive! ONLY FOUR ROLES
SINCE LETHAL WEAPON FOUR? I don't believe it! Anyway another
entry in the books. That's a freebee if Trump decides to double down on
eliminating Social Security. Frame it as if you'll be getting more
money in the mean time! See how that works out! I can't wait to
find out. Anyway, I'll see ya later.
August 26, 2020
In This Together
I got a nice Beer replacement for today. It's a Virgin Speedball &
Orange Juice. I feel like that's a Healthy Brunch. The point is,
though, almost 48 hours since Last Beer, roughly 24 hours till Next Beer.
I'm not addicted I JUST KNOW WHAT I LIKE. People look forward to Great
things there's nothing wrong with that. Anyway cut my Middle Finger
Knuckle-- right hand version. Dunno how that happened! I'd
have to have been unconsciously consciously TRYING to cut it that way wit the
Sharpness I got in my mattress. These kinds of things don't just
happen. But the point is hey bled a little bit I can enjoy some
blood. Mopping it up with THE SAME INDIVIDUAL TISSUE every 120 seconds.
And that lasted for about 15, 20 minutes. Now it's starting to
congeal. Which means when everyone finds how solidly the blood is forming
as Agreeable and Pleasant.
So, great. Lemme Hit that Brunch Right About Now.
Biden just had one Terrible Poll which knocked him down ALMOST AN ENTIRE FREAKIN'
POINT. I blame either the pollster for Doing Bad or I might blame the
interviewees for Giving The Wrong Answer. The answer that doesn't make me
happy. What's their game, hey just wanna make me upset? Well
mission accomplished you JERKS. The good news is after spending months
drinking Coors Light almost exclusively and constantly being like ya know
this isn't the best tasting beer. Not even in terms of Regular Beers I've
Had. Not my favorite! after all that finally goin for some, "Miller
Lite," for Next NewThursweek. Wait, it would be Old Thursweek.
Now its NewMonWeek. Right? I dunno. I'm only confusing myself.
Okay. Got a solid 2 meals today before I re-up with
super market. We're talkin' some left over PENNE with One Meatball and
SOME TOMATO SAUCE NOT AS MUCH AS WE SHOULD HAVE MADE and also PRESUMABLY PAIR IT
WITH A DINNER ROLL THAT'S INDICATIVE OF HOW MUCH PENNE THERE IS. ALso the
other meal is Roast Beef Sandwich't with Beef Barley Soup Presumably!
Which comes first? I DUNNO IT ALL DEPENDS. The point is I just went
10 minutes finalizing SuperMarket Re-uption. This time around I'm gettin a
Fresh Breaked Bead like a French Baguette! They didn't SPECIFY it was
French nor a Baguette but I know a baguette when I see one and THAT'S WHAT
I'M LOOKIN AT. ALso its for SANDWICHES get your head out of the
gutter. We're talkin .5 pound of Good Corn't Beef. Trying .5 pound
of (Presumably Good) Pastrami. It's Hebrew's National's like the Good
Corn't Beef was so SOUNDS BAOUT RIGHT. Oh so its ok for HEBREWS to be
Nationalists but THE FOR THE REST OF US SUDDENLY WE'RE JERKS? I dunno
I might have to look into where they got that name from. Maybe there IS
Haven't even had my Virgin Speedball yet. Which I keep
wanting to call an 8 Ball. I think that's more fun. Also it relates
to the inherent concept that uh oh we have no idea what's gonna happen!
"ASK AGAIN LATER?" YOU'RE THE BOSS! An, "Eight Ball," is
apparently just an eighth of an ounce of cocaine. That's FUN but not
THAT MUCH FUN. I want it to be a Specific Thing That Makes You FEEL LIKE
You're Ridin' That Eight Ball of either Billiards or Predicting Things Fame.
The point is I am a responsible adult American Citizen and the only drugs I
abuse are alcohol and in the past marijuana and, God Willing, in the future
marijuana. Oh and other prescribed controlled substances. BUT
THAT'S WHERE I DRAW THE LINE! Hmm there must be SOME OTHER DRUGS I
could incorporate into my every day life. I'll keep you
updated on this situation as it progresses.
Wonderful! Maybe its just me but am I wrong that an
eigth of an ounce of something that'd very fine powder a lot. I'd
look it up but, ya know. I Don't Know. Maybe I will look it up.
That way I can se how much the standard, "Line," is. Never know when that
knowledge might come in handy! So I know to do FOUR TIMES THAT MUCH
TO IMPRESS REALLY GET IN THE SPIRIT OF THINGS. Google ain't givin' me no
easy answers on Standard Lines or whatnot. I guess it's A Scam Google
doesn't want us to be cocaine heads and ya know what I Don't Blame 'Em GOogle is
right drugs are bad! Except for the ones prescribed to you even if you
take them strategically. I'M NOT TAKING KLONOPIN OR RITALIN MORE THAN
PRESCRIBED, LESS IF ANYTHING. I JUST USE STRATEGY!
I'll be back in a bit!
got lunch coming up for Part III of entry in a little bit. Gonna go with
the Pasta Over The Soup and Sandwich. Soup is not a great lunch to have
While Writing. Other food is better hot and gets colder but STILL EATABLE
at room temperature. You got a room temperature soup YOU GOT NOTHING its
worthless you don't need that kind of crap! Also its distracting you gtta go
Back and Forth and Back and Forth and YOU'RE THINKING TOO MUCH ABOUT EATING SOUP
that you can't devote any thought to what you're trying to write. Not like
eating some PENNE. Only negative is, soup lasts much longer than PENNE.
At least the amount of PENNE I Future-Have.
Cool! Hey whats your favorite swing
state that you A) want Biden to win and B) want it to be THE Tipping State For
Some reason Somehow. I think my Ultimate Dream would be GEORGIA
but that's hard to be the Tipping State, so I'm gonna go with Florida.
Still kinda hard to be the Tipping State but I DUNNO I GOT A GOOD FEELING ABOUT
THE SOUTH EAST COAST. They GET ME so to speak o something, I dunno,
this line of conversation is nonsense. If I had to pick from one of
the three generic tipping point states-- Michigan, Pennsylvania, or Wisconsin--
I dunno. First instinct is Pennsylvania. I've BEEN to Pennsylvania
that's where Hershey Park is THEY GAVE ME CHOCOLATE BARS ALL DAY FOR A ROUGHLY 2
or 3 DAY STAY AT HERSHEY PARK BRAND RESORT HOTELS. What has Wisconsin
ever done for me. Hmm. Gave me Chris Farley. Yeah gave us
ALL Chris Farley I said what has it done FOR ME. That shut 'em
Cool! Lookin' forward to Presidential Debates.
So we got that to look forward to for some reason! Anyway. What kind
of entertainment do I got going on for myself after this entry. Well
there's eating Soup at dinner time, that's something. Sure.
Wonderful. Fine! Oh right What To Use For Entertainment.
I watched Hope Springs yesterday after seeing it in Theaters 8 years ago.
It's a good movie because... uh... good cast. Beisdes that I'm
not 100% sure this technically reaches all the benchmarks that A Movie Must?
But It's got Good Actors so Hey What Can Ya Do. It's a horror movie
because its like you too will become elderly and detached from any real
tangible relationship with your significant other. And aAnd
also its a horror movie because its like you till will LIVE with your elderly
and detached from any real meaningful relationship with your significant others
Parents and now YOU GOTTA DEAL WITH THAT Side Effects Of That!
But oh well such is life. Look, I just got started
on lunch, and the bad news is the remaining Penne is DANGEROUSLY low in tomato
sauce. The good news is who gives a damn lemme just shove this down my
gullet and it'll all work out for the best. What else is going on.
I was watching Stephen Carrell be a fine Third Wheel to Tommy Lee Jokes and
Merryl Streep and I was like I wonder if they'll make a sequel to Space
Force. Either in Fiction or in Real Life. What was THAT All About Am
I Right?! Anyway. I just saw some of Jacob Blake's sister
speaking and I feel guilty for appreciating the power of speakers who are
personally related to (and/or ARE) the victims of police... uh... murder.
Fine, in this case, ATTEMPTED MUrder. It shouldn't take a tragedy to
be exposed to such powerful voices.
Something along those lines. I'm gonna guess
A Line is like a fifth of a gram. LMLTURQ. That'd be a Big Line,
it's probably like half that. Or someting. I DUNNO INTERNET IS BEING
CRYPTIC. Hmm maybe I should watch #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor
when this entry is done. Hasn't steered me wrong yet! Not As Far As
I Know! Finished lunch. When this paragraph is over, here's the
plan-- bring plate downstairs. Bring UPstairs a glass of water! I'm
parched let me tell you. Those cruched red peppers sprinkled on Slightly
Too Dry Penne, all combined to make me Positively Parched! Anyway I found
a way to request Absentee Ballot Easily in NYC specifically.
AS STEPHEN COLBERT MIGHT
SAY, "GET CRACKIN'!"
Everyone's In This Together Besides You
that's a relief. I don't need the Hassle of Being In Something.
Too much pressure! Anyway I saw that kid who grinned like an asshole at
American Indian WAS THE KEYNOTE SPEAKER OF THE CONVENTION. He spoke about
Cancel Culture. Which I believe is a reference to the slogan rallying cry
JEWS WILL NOT CANCEL US. Let's face it, IN REAL Culture, Jews
probably are doing disproportionate amount of canceling. They work in
the entertainment industry THAT'S JUST FACTS. Jews are also more often
than not the VICTIM of canceling-- it goes both ways! A couple of months
ago I had an entire Entry devoted to Canceling. If I remember correctly it
was a solid B/B+ but the best part about it was that It Was Actually A Thing.
There was a theme and everything that I kept to! Sounds good to me.
Anyway how does FUture Poop decide whether it wants to be Hard, Diarrhea, or
anywhere in between. I feel like it's not to often I squeeze out some
Regular Poop, some Liquidly Poop, then back to some regular. The poop in
my lower intestine (OR COLON AT THAT POINT?) is 100% CONFORMIST it gets with the
median consistency as the rest. HAVE SOME INDIVIDUALITY PIECES OF POOP
CMON THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING.
It took me to become An Adult to start using the word,
"Poop." Never was in my vocabulary as a kid, whether in terms of using
Polite language or Vaguely Inappropriate Language. Just wasn't a factor!
These are THE REAL Issues! One of my favorite things is running out
of toilet paper, and I NEED IT, and I have a nice roll of paper towels standing
by on the sink counter, and I'm like, I'm gonna tear this into 6ths and GET
MYSELF A REAL NICE DEEP WIPE GOIN'. Then I have to decide whether to flush
it or throw out it. With that thickness, you're risking clogging the
toilet. But if there's too much poop I just can't just throw it out!
It'd be IRRESPONSIBLE.
That's life I guess. Was the Looney Tunes guy who was
like A Lothario the same guy who was a skunk and stunk up the place.
Yep. Pepe Le Pew. Was quite the Ladies Man if not for his
unfortunate odors. Instead of driving wedge issues and making Biden
comment specifically ARE YOU FOR THIS ONE TIME THE PROTESTERS GOT VIOLENT, maybe
we can do the reverse and as Republicans WERE YOU OKAY WITH THIS JACOB BLAKE
SHOOTING THIS ONE SPEICFIC TIME? Sure the best they could say is I
DON'T REALLY KNOW THAT SITUATION because that's their get out of jail free
card for getting out of anything. I DUNNO WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT,
YOU SEE I ONLY PAY ATTENTION TO THE IMPORTANT THINGS THAT NOBODY WILL ASK ME
ABOUT LATER. Or, true to form, they may be just like Yep Blue Lives
Blue, If The Blue Wanted TO Do It, Then Blue It To It! They have those
I dunno I'm not politician. I'm hardly even ANY
kind of Tician. But this is the second to last paragraph, I got that going
on! How's baseball going. I like Fernando Tatis Jr. I like
ALLL The Juniors. Not George W Bush. Or Donald Trump Jr. All
the Good Guy Juniors. Not Problem Child in Problem Child One Or II.
Although by Child Problem Two He Is A Decent Kid And Son for a good part of it.
The point is Junior Soprano isn't all there by the end of the series but what am
I supposed to do about it? Hey baseball is 1/2 through baseball.
I like looking at the odds because 80% of the teams are like 30-70% chance they
make playoffs. Talk About Your Parity! It's an interesting subject.
Not just your parity, but my parity, their parity, All the Parities!
Last paragraph! As far as I can tell, a solid 50% of
the RNC Platform Campaiging Premise is we all agree bipartisanlly on a decent
amount of Whats Going Wrong, but somehow its not OUR FAULT, who have been in
charge for four years, IT'S THEIR FAULT. Somehow. I
guess. ALL THIS BAD STUFF JUST KEEPS HAPPENING TO US, REPUBLICANS, FOR
SOME REASON, ITS ALMOST LIKE LIFE'S HARDSHIPS HAVE A PRO-LIBERAL BIAS. But
now that we know what NOT TO DO... You gotta imagine we'd NOW BE BETTER AT
ADDRESSING STUFF SHOULD WE GET THE CHANCE!!! TrumpPence 2020. And the
subtext is nope I Do Not have to imagine that. Nor am I able to.
Hey #TalesFromTheCryptSummerTiShriekFor has never led me astray over the past
several years. So I got that going for me. Anyway gonna write one
more bonus paragraph. For Fun!
Cool. I don't get why America doesn't want Puerto Rico
as a state. I can get why Puerto Rico might not WANT to be a state.
But, c'mon. RICH PORT? JUST IMAGINE ALL THE MONIES ACCUMULATED.
Also if it does become a state do we continue calling it Puerto Rico or do we
translate it into American-- Rich Port. On the other hand I feel like I've
seen Puerto Ricans in films and TVs AND I WANT THEM TO BE PART OF MY AMERICAN
SOCIETY THEY'VE GOT IT GOING ON. I dunno the point of this last bonus
paragraph. I don't know lots of points. I jut think Puerto Rico
would be FUN to be a state. And then DC is a state and each week of the
year we devote to celebrating an individual State Cause It's A Clean 52 Now OH
MAN HOW MUCH WOULD THAT BE. And it would BRING OUR COUNTRY TOGETHER after
being so divided. We go from Idaho Week to Illinois Week and WE HOLD HANDS
AND SHRIEK FOR JOY FOR WE ARE UNITED AGAIN. Yep seems to check out!
I'll see you later.
August 25, 2020
Is Old Tuesday
One day this will be Regular Societally Accepted Universally Tuesday.
Presumably! That'd be my guess. Anyway since I have no beer I
decided to do a Virgin Speedball just now-- 1 Ritalin and 1 Klonopin.
That's what I would do 90% of the time I was doing open mics. Except more
than 1 each. I start off with one each THEN I PLAY IT BY EAR FOR THE
REST OF THE NIGHT. The point is if Chris Farley didn't want my generation
to do drugs he wouldn't have made Dying From A Drug Overdose so glamorous!
Just kidding its nobodies fault but mine. Maybe just my genetics.
THESE THINGS ARE LEGITIMATELY PRESCRIBED TO ME AND WHAT I JUST DID IS TOTALLY
APPROVED OF BY DOCTORS, JUST DOING 1 OF EACH ONCE UPON A TIME. But
still It's Life On The Wild Edge or something like that I dunno I don't care
Yeah! Also I'm drinking coffee you know what
that's like right. That was my Five Minutes at the end of Comedy
Class. Talkin' bout Starbucks. I think that was the entire 5
minutes. I have no way of knowing! Yes I have video of it But I
Can't Watch Myself On Video I CAN'T STAND THIS GUY! Looks like I'm
finished with Corn't Beef, having Roast Beef sandwich for lunch, then probably a
Nice Communal Pasta & Meat'd Balls for dinner. So I got a lot going for
me is the point. Anyway what else is going on. Yes if
Outside Ever Opens Up Again I'd definitely consider doing Open Mics again.
Because It sounds like FUN and also I'LL GET OKAY AT IT AFTER SEVERAL MONTHS.
The point is Jeez how am I supposed to get through entry without alcohol?
Oh just keep living. Life will take care of myself. Just DON'T
RENDER MYSELF UNCONSCIOUS AND LIFE FINDS A WAY. Hey, even if I
do render myself unconscious. I could just be UNCONSCIOUS until
Beer shows up in 46 Hours Or So! EHH that sounds like a lot of work.
The point is Great. Third paragraph. OH YEAH I HAD
SOME FROZEN MEAL I COULD HAVE FOR LUNCH. I LIKE the sounds of that.
Started typing THE into Google and it suggested THE BATMAN (2021).
Look, yeah, I'm sure a lot of people are excited about The Batman (2021).
But don't you think you're getting a little bit ahead of yourself? I just
said THE. And you're going ah I know what you're after You Wanna Learn
About The Batman (2021). Well now I'm no longer on board with Google.
BACK TO ALTAVISTA for me! WHAT? ALTAVISTA IS NO LONGER A THING?
WHAT THE HELL DO I CARE! All that counts is IT WAS a thing and was a GOOD
Reference and MY JOB IS DONE HERE. What else. What
does, "Alta Vista," mean in English. LMLTURQ. High View.
Now you're talking my language! ... English! Before it was
Okay. Watching A & E Documentary Series like My
Fabulous Six Million Pound Wedding is kind of like being drunk.
Mostly getting that sensation probably from all the times In The Past I would
just Get Drunk and Watch My Fabulous Six Million Pound Weddings, etc.
The two deeds are inexorably linked in my mind. A reaallll Twist of
Fate. Hey a, "New," Elliott Smith Album is coming out this week!
It's a Remastering of Elliott Smith (Elliott Smith) but with a 2nd Disc of live
recordings, presumably all the same live, "Concert," and also presumably one of
if not the first time he was doing This Set Of Songs Live? I feel like
that last part may be in accurate but also MAY BE ACCURATE.
I was just watching The Simpsons where Homer and Ned go to
Las Vegas and there's a scene where Gil has a castle of chips in front of him
and loses them at Roulette or whatever and is like OH WHY DID I BET THE
COMPANY PAYROLL. And I realized oh that's our economy in real life
but instead of Poor Ol Gil its Gil's Superiors ALWAYS COMIN' OUT ON TOP.
Just big corporations gambling it all and then if they lose all the have to do
hit is the Refresh Funds button and we bail 'em out. THAT'S THE
GUIDING LIGHT OF WHAT OUR POLICY HAS BEEN DURING TRUMP'S PRESIDENCY.
To be fair we've been headed in that direction for a long time. But it's Really
Maturing, this Corporate Kleptocracy & Whatnot. HEY I DON'T LIKE THE
SOUND OF THAT. But, please, keep telling me about how the one area
Trump is ahead of Biden is Who Trusts More With Economy With Who Does Economy
Man Polling. To be fair, I don't except much from Biden on Economy
either, but he'd be way ahead of Trump in Helping AVERAGE Joes would be my
And my guesses mean a lot I'm a smart guy I AM THE
SMARTEST MAN OUT OF EVERY 400 PEOPLE ROUGHLY. But then again I tend to try
to be more optimistic these days so my guesses may be tinted by the desire to
Find The Best instead of just Accurately Making Actuairizations & Whatnot.
Such Is Life! We all need to find a balance in Focusing On The Good In Life with
Focusing on The Real In Life So We May Improve Those Areas Of Real Life.
That's MY Hot Take. Hey I get to take a break in ROUGHLY SEVERAL
SENTENCES. That's not so bad. Hmm wonder what's up with The
Batman (2021). Probably nothing new. BUT HOW CAN I KNOW FOR SURE
WITHOUT CHECKING!! DAMNIT I TALKED MYSELF INTO THIS CONUNRUM by,
"Slamming," Google and now I need it again! AND I CAN'T GO BACK TO
ALTAVISTA IT'S NOT EXISTING ANYMOR ITS JUST A SUBSIDIARY OF YAHOO AND YOU
KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT YAHOO!
Website Means A Lot To Me
like I'm gonna skip the Roast Beef Sandwich, go with a Frozen Meal. It has
CHICKEN Noodles Vegetables And POSSIBLY a 4th ingredient! Might pair it
up with a dinner roll You Know How I Do. Also got some Orange Juice
going right now. Well the most appealing way to spend the rest of my
day is Cycle Through Some #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekForSomeMore .
Because it's FUN and Entertiniang AND I GET BETTER AT EVERY FEW MONTHS.
That can't just be me, that's gotta be a universal feeling we each get ALL THE
TIME watching Movies, TV, musics, and just thinking yeah the yeah the first
60 times I watched this I thought i get it, but THIS TIME, NO THIS TIME I
ACTUALLY DO GET IT!. And And buying into your
FinallyGettingItTude. And we KNOW the next time we'll get it in a
different way. But whatever CurrentWayYou'reGettingIt always feels like
ALRIGHT I'M GROWING AS A PERSON. You Don't Get Fiction, Fiction
Gets You. Well when you put it that way I Seem like a Dumb Jerk
Even TRYING to get things. Yep seems to check out.
So, sure, great, why am I still in bold. There
we go. Uh oh now I'm in italics it never ends Oh Okay Back To Normal
Wait I'm Still In capitalizing the beginning of each word but no longer now
this is just run on sentence. Fascinating. I've
been drinking less coffee the last few weeks perhaps months. 1-2 cups
instead of 3-5 a day. Prove me wrong! The point is I
watched it and Drag Me To Hell WAS the movie I was hitnking of. I told
you it had a 70% chance of A Sad Scary Ending but let me amend that.
Down t' 50% chance. That'll throw 'em off the scent! Anyway.
It was an okay movie. I felt less sympathy AND empathy for leading actress
roll character than the first time. I mean, she's still like 80% your
regular innocent leading horror lady with bad stuff happening to her. But
there's a solid 1 out of 5 of her that kinda has it coming. 1/5!
Some might argue more, some might argue less. I'm splitting the difference
and saying this Heroine had 20% of it coming.
Well that's wonderful. Also her boss was the
guy who was in a #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor a week ago that Iw as
talking about. I think I deleted this mini-rant about him, but basically I
kept trying to call him Kevin Nealon and then I was like wait no Kevin
Nealon is Kevin Nealon, and this other guy Is No Kevin Nealon, but I se him all
the time! So I google him and its like yes this man I have never
heard of his name before how is that possible. But the point is He IS
a man he is NOT Kevin Nealon and He Was In This Movie!. What's his name?
LMLTURQ. DAVID PAYMER. You'd probably know him if you saw
him. He's GOT THAT INTANGIBLE LADIES WANT TO BE HIM AND MEN WANT TO BE
WITH HIM. The point is I started a new roll of toilet paper today.
So basically it's all downhill from there.
What paragraph we into. Fourth of Section II?
YES EXACTLY. I am the, "King," at, "Estimating Things," "Sometimes,
not always that great, I was just this past one time only thing, though!"
I was strongly considering a Cup o Noodles for lunch but now that I got pasta
for dinner I can't have 2 things of noodles in one day? What would people
say. I'd be a pariah! Wait, no. I'd be a piranha! Why
are piranhas supposedly very dangerous and scary fish. Like they eat
people up really quickly, that's my impression of their mode of attack.
Sure any fish can bite you but Piranhas THEY DON'T PLAY.
LMLTURQ. Eh I googled it and got bored. Too bored to read
about it. That's life I guess! Cool. I know in
cartoons they can eat your entire body in seconds. But I'm not sure if I
trust cartoons re: how quickly it takes entire bodies to be eaten.
Wonderful! He just LOOKS like a Kevin Nealon.
Not THE Kevin Nealon. But A Kevin Nealon! Hey I haven't
watched Jon Lovitz #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor in AT LEAST two weeks.
And I enjoy it because Jon Lovitz is The Hero We Deserve. Hmm who plays
Alfred in The Batman (2021). NO! I MUST RESIST THE URGE TO
GOOGLE, "The Batman!" Otherwise it'll only encourage them to do algorithms
in the future insisting OTHER people mean The Batman by just typing The.
And that's not a world I wanna help build. I'm AGAINST that kind of world!
Alt lunch option-- pizza. Not gonna happen. But its an Alt Option!
I Guess! Jon Lovitz kinda looks like a Kevin Nealon, too. Hmm.
I've given myself a lot to think about! I'll be back in a bit with lunch
An Example of a Title
Just put lunch IN OVEN. We're talkin' French Bread Pizza! It's
in the same FAMILY of Foods as Future Pasta & Meatball but it's still different
enough that I don't feel too much like I'm Doubling Down in an
irresponsible fashion. Point is that'll be ready in about 35 minutes,
hopefully be done with entry by then, but if not, so what?! It doesn't
matter at all. I dunno what I'm gonna watch when this entry is over!
I'll let the pizza decide. Well, Me On Pizza. I Saw Jacob
Blake is probably going to live, but paralyzed from the waist down. Hmm
pullin' the ol 50 Cent are we? Shot 7 times and the bullets bounce
off ya! Except for this PARALYZED thing. That's a jip! Hmm
looks like 50 Cent survived NINE bullets. MOVE OVER JAMES BLAKE YOU'VE
HAD YOUR 15 MINUTES OF FAME LETS GET 50 CENT BACK OUT HERE!!
The point is I hope against hope that this guy is able to
Live Life in every respect, not including walking, and maybe becomes a leading
voice in activism with the ultimate goal to end police violence and
discrimination. Because many of the top cases in which we're reminded of police
violence hostility and discrimination, ultimately ended up with the guy or gal
who got shot by police dying. So to have a SURVIVOR would be particularly
inspiring. Although those Family Members of George Floyd are not
without their charm! The point is we need all the heroes we can get!
That's just my guess! Or, maybe he just wants to Thank God he survived
(presumably!) enjoy his life. That's sounds like a good option too is my
guess! Either way HERO. Maybe a little bit more of a hero if
there were 2 more bullet wounds but STILL A HERO SEVEN TIMES OVER AIN'T BAD.
I am the authority on Black Activism & Culture I SAW
THE BLACK REMAKE OF THE HONEYMOONERS SEVERAL MONTHS BACK. It's just a
futile attempt to find the positive in the Fuckiest Fucked situation. He
survived, that's the positive. Anything else is a blessing, that's how I'd go
about looking at things. Anyway JAMES BLAKE. That's the name.
I read it a dozen times over the last couple of days but Forgot It when trying
to Altavista for this section of entry. James Blake, just remember, this
ol mnumonic device--- first letter of first name is J, then a, then m, then e,
then s. First name is "James!" Last name, similar procedure to keep
it fresh in your mind--- First letter is B, the next letter is L, then comes an
A, after that a K believe it or not, and then ends up with an E. HIS
NAME IS JACOB BLAKE. YEAH, but, uh... ya see, I got, no, what I
meant to say, the point is, when you see it my way... HIS NAME IS JACOB
BLAKE. JACKOB BLAKE. JAKE-UB BLAY-K!
Ya know what, lets look at the bright side of things.
How much were you REALLY committed to having, "Being Able To Walk," as part of
your personality. No more walking, it's alllll Rolling from here on
out! And no one can give you guff about it at all! DAMNIT WHY DID I
HAVE TO READ AN ARTICLE ABOUT THIS GUY AND HIS FAMILY AND BACKGROUND. Now
I can't even PRETEND that being confined to a real chair MAY even be a positive
thing. The only thing that these paragraphs have accomplished AT ALL is
that II nI now know his name Is Jacob Blake. Not James Blake. Not
anything else! Jacob Blake. Nice simple name. First name ends
with a B, last name starts with a B. It's A GOOD SOLID NAME. So
he's way ahead of the game with a name like that.
Yeesh. Well that doesn't solve any of MY
problems like WHAT TO WATCH WHEN THIS IS OVER. I've got a lot of ADEQUATE
choices but nothing that really likes alright Definitely gotta do this one
right here and whatnot. Hmm. If they have these new Motorized
Bikes that you can ride as a bike but don't always have to pedal, can't we all
just get around on decked out wheeling chairs? Is it offensive to thos who
need them? Maybe! Maybe it's a form of praise and respect. You and your
wheelchair got it going on, its only natural the rest of us see that and waht to
participate. Something along those lines. Is anyone ever
paralyzed from the waist up. Like you can't move a single facial
muscle, can't turn on your side, lift a finger... but your legs are goin' back
an forth like crazy. And you'd have to develop a way to communicate Using
Legs. Hmm. That sounds like something that might happen one day.
We better get start on the Leg Communication Language NOW so we're ready for
when it DOES come!
Anyway, one or two more paragraphs to go. Probably 1!
That makes 17 paragraphs overall. 17 is one of the sweetest numbers out
there and I don't know why! I think I once read that if you're picking a
number at random, without ANY instructions or dividing lines, 17 is the Oddest
(But in the end most predictable) number people can come up with. Or I
made that all up in a dream, who knows, I don't know! What else.
OH this is important-- I know I've been worn down by all the police
killings and assorted violence and discrimination, but Don't Let Yourself Get
Worn down. It feels like it never stops, but then, ou response can never
stop. Maybe making dumb jokes isn't Productive about it but At Least Keep
the conversation going indefinitely. Never let up. That's all I can
do, make dumb jokes, that's on me. :(
The other moral of the story was that was my first
thought when I heard he may live. Awesome he can become an inspiration
Figure Of Resistance. An ALIVE Inspiration Figure!
But then I was like hey the man just almost died is paralyzed why don't you
back off for a second. The other bad news is I have roughly 2-3
glasses worth of soda-- Diet Dr. Pepper-- to last me the next day and a half.
I can DO it but I'm not HAPPY about it. The point is I do no good
but at least I do no harm and that's why I got a C+ on my Medical Care
Doctorate. Hey this patient just came in paralyzed from the waist down
what did you do to help him. Well, FIRST, I did no harm!
Ok that's halfway there C+! Anyway I'll see you guys later.
August 24, 2020
24 LOL I GET IT
Hey it's a new Week in terms of Hey maybe Mondays are the first day of the
week. Is that a Universal Existential Crisis all Quarnatiningers
Without Work are going through. What even ARE weeks anymore.
I mean, day-to-day, sure we know that's a conundrum. We've all realized
there IS no way to determine a Monday from a Friday. But let's think about
WEEKS when do WEEKS start. My guess is Thursdays that's when my Beer
and Groceries come. Might as well make that the start of the #SupermarketSuppliesWeekToRemember.
Months make a lot of sense, though. Almost MORE sense than they made in
the past. Not even, "Almost," I GET MONTHS IN A WAY I NEVER THOUGHT
Fascinating. Got some Corn't Beef OR Roas't Beef
for lunch today. With some Hearty Savory Beef Barley (Which May Double As
Gravy). THE LAST PART WAS TO INCLUDE AN EXTRA SLANT RHYME IN THE
PHRASE. That's how you know something is a good phrase! If it
incorporates Slant Rhyme! The pitn is I have 3 beers for todya, Zero for
Tuesday (Tomorrow), Zero for Wednesday (Sometime next month) and then on
Thursday I re-up (I think this is referring to what happened Last Thursday?)
What else is going on and crap. From what I can tell, Biden had a Modest
Bump in National Election Poll of about 1 or 1.5 points since Convention.
And a more noticeable bump in his Personal Approval/and-or-Disapproval Rating
Deficit/Surplus/Who Can Remember. WONDERFUL I'M SUPPORTING THIS GUY FOR
PRESIDENT. My Dad told me yesterday He Found An Easy Way TO Apply For
Absentee Ballot on internet. But I didn't find it!
Which is upsetting because I guess they have it set up that
Old People Tend To Find It Easier Than Young People. SOUNDS LIKE A SCAM
TO ME. #MAILINVIALSELECTIONTOREMEMBER. Also now its a Drug Use
Pay-It-Forward Thing. Wait Vials have nothing to do with illegal
drug use. Does it? If you inject the blood of a guy who was High
On Something, does his Blood Get YOU high five weeks later when you finally get
it though the mail. Oh, the but point is, I'm gonna continue to try
to find out How To Vote MYSELF without relying on my Dad. MY GENERATION
DOESN'T HAVE AS CLOSE A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR DADS AS ME, WE NEED TO FIGURE
THIS ONE OUT ON OUR LONESOME. Anyway I have too much Deli Meat for now.
I could have 1 Delil Meat Meal A Day for the rest of the Thursweek and STILL
have some left over for NextThursweek. Such is life!
Cool. Definitely had Patton Oswalt in my dream last
night. Playing himself! Not him playing some character in my dream.
Well he was playing a VERSION of himself we can agree to disagree on that.
May have been the last Professional Entertainment Show I've seen live. His
stand-up. In either late 2018 or 2019. No way of knowing!
Oh well such is life. Wait a second I seen some shows in late 2019.
Yeah but they weren't as PROFESSIONAL as Patton Oswalt was.
This guy Shows Up He's Right Down To Business He's Got It All Figured Out Aces!
Yes I had to add, "Oswalt," to the Microsoft FrontPage Dictionary if not Me then
Who? Also I was about to type Yes I had to add, "PATTON Oswalt," to
the... but I stopped because Microsoft FrontPage Dictionary DON'T DO NO
PHRASES jut individual words.
What was my first impression of Patton Oswalt. Must
have had an HBO special in the late 1990's that I became aware of in the early
2000's, right? It's possible HBO. He had 2 Stand Ups there in the
late 1990's. Hmm my first thought was was he ever on Mr. Show
because thats where I first really got to know most of my favorite Comedians of
that generation and I was like NOPE HE WAS NEVER ON MR. SHOW and then
Wikipedia was like YUP HE WAS ON MR. SHOW AT LEAST TWICE C'MON. And
I was like WOW MR. SHOW I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT. The point is I've
always been a Comedy Fanboy my entire life until I started writing, "COMEDY,"
every day and then there's no room in my heart to be an all-out fan-boy of
other comedy. I ONLY HAVE IT IN MY HEART TO BE A FAN OF MYSELF.
That'll learn 'em, that'll learn 'em real good. I dunno. I'm still A
FAN just not Fan BOY. I'm a FAN MAN GET WITH THE TIMES I'M AN
ADULT AT THIS POINT IS THE POINT I'M TRYING TO MAKE.
Fascinating. Sometimes I try to re-watch Mr. Show
and it's still Great and Fun and Wonderful but I just get upset because it's not
AS great and fun and wonderful as I found it when I was a teenager. I
dunno if that's ON ME or if its on SOCIETY or if its maybe no MR SHOW but the
point is I only find things wonderful when I am a young man and now that I am a
slightly older man I only hve enough room in my heart to Find Myself Wonderful
SUCH IS LIFE IT SUCKS I KNOW! The real scam is I don't even REALLY find
myself wonderful. I spend all my energy TRYING to find myself wonderful.
So when I find something wonderful like Mr Show IT DOESN'T RESONATE ANYMORE
BECAUSE THAT'S NOT WHAT FINDINGWONDERFULNESS IS TO ME ANYMORE. YEAH THAT
RIGHT! Hey last paragraph of the section. I'll be back in a bit.
On The Right Track
Apparently Trump (Donald) already spoke once. Sweet already got 20 or
40 minutes of potentially hearing him talking Out Of The Way. There
was Some Chance I would have been exposed to his live speech! Now there's
no chance! Except fhr the other half a dozen times he's apparently
speaking this week. Oh well what can ya do. I did see Mike
Pence used my Make America Great Again Again. But he added in a,
"Comma," supposedly. I didn't HEAR HIM SAY IT so I can't say how
much he PRONOUNCED the comma but in the transcription there was a comma.
And YES the comma makes all the difference. Well, part of the
difference. Dumb either way. But an Extra Dumb without the comma.
Hmm maybe it IS dumber WITH the comma. I've given myself a lot to think
What else is going on and crap. Corn't Beef Sandwich
for Part III of the entry in, I dunno, 45 minutes? An hour? Nobody
Know! What have I been watching on Starz. I watched Bad Boys
For Life. It's a Horror movie because we glorify and glamorize The Murder
Police who Abuse THem Authorities. My Dad just called me and was like
did yuo open this box of wheat thins and I was like I don't think so, no
and then I was like wait a second I'm VERY 100% CERTAIN I DIDN'T I DUNNO WHY
I QUALIFIED MY FIRST ANSWER WITH SOME DOUBT AS IF I WASN'T SURE. NOPE
I DEFINITELY DID NOT OPEN THIS BOX OF WHEAT THINS AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO
IT. Maybe my Mom opened it. What am I a Past Soothsayer?
Probably not I'D BE AWARE OF IT TWERE IT TO BE THE CASE.
I Dunno! It's not weird at all that
the RNC has no Party Platform and is 60% The Trump Family. It's true
its not weird it's HORRIFYING. And Pathetic. But this time
around MOSTLY HORRIFYING. Our only hope is that it's pretty obviously
horrifying and/or weird to Your Average Joe (Not President Campaign Candidate
he's Exceptional Joe) as well. Who knows not me. Man I'd like
to have a bagel with cream't cheese or butter BUT I HAVE TOO MUCH DELI MEAT.
Whatta scam. FINE I'M OKAY WITH SANDWICH ITS ALL GOOD. When
you look at the 538 Page of Election Forecast & Whatnot, the background is just
a 10x10 pattern or whatever of Possible Maps of Electoral College Victories.
1/4th of the time (as per the current odds) you see a somewhat-random Red Map
which has Won States In Red and lsot states in white. And then 75% of the
rest of the background is Blue Map which has Won States In Blue and lost states
in white. And 2 nights in a row I've been dreaming off these maps. I
guess My Head Is Dumb and Preoccupied With This. BUT I STILL BLAME 538
FOR BEING ENABLING. THEY ENABLE MY MINDSHIT WORRYSOME OCDNESS.
SOMEONE has got to take responsibly! Anyway. I dunno I LIKE THE
ECONOMIST FORECAST THEY HAVE BIDEN UP by 89% INSTEAD OF 73%. SURE SEEMS
LIKE THEY'RE DOING THINGS BETTER THAT'D BE MY GUESS.
Hey that Chris Farley, "Documentary," was pretty good. I think it
was just One Episode of a Reboot of A & E Biography but either way Well
Done. I've always felt kind of guilty for enjoying movies as a child which
I later learned Farley was ashamed of. Beverly Hills Ninja. It's A
GREAT MOVIE for a nine year old! I don't mean that as a, "Dig!" If
only you had Stuck Around Earth I'm 100% possitive you could have made GREAT
MOVIES for nineTEEN year olds. And then NINETY year olds. And then
NINE HUNDRED YEARS OLD. And then ARE YOU ALSO AGING ALONG WITH THESE
AUDIENCES OR ARE YOU JUST MAKING MOVIES FOR FUTURE 900 YEAR OLDS WHEN YOU'RE IN
YOUR 40'S, IN THE PAST REAL LIFE DECADE OR TWO.
Also the lady I lost my virginity to, she had a book of
Quotes or Somethin' About and/or From Chris Farley that she left in our Common
Area Dorm Way Back When. I remember it because I was like wait a second
this lady just gave me sex. Hmm. Oh Yeah, Also, Hey, Chris Farley fan,
huh? I CAN, "DIG," THAT! Something along those lines. Also
I'm having a hard time determining of how often I watched SNL in the 90's.
I definitely saw it Here And There. I was aware of Adam Sandler, Chris
Farley, etc as being originally on SNL before hitting it big with film.
Not just in the abstract, but in the sense that yes At The Time I remembred
Them Being In Sketches And Whatnot. But I never was a HUGE SNL fan, in
regards to Remembering Individual moments. I DO remember watching MadTV
half a dozen times and somehow being prescient enough to be Too Cool For School
to realize MadTV was lame and SNL was cool. I FIGURED THIS OUT AT
EIGHT YEARS OLD I MUSTA BEEN SOME GENIUS WHO RECOGNIZES ENTERTAINMENT COMEDY
WHEN HE SEES IT.
Anyway I got that going on for me in the past. In
the past, I had Book going on... with Sex! Then in A Different Past I had
SNL going on with..out... sex. Good thing, too, sex at that point
woulda been No Bueno. I would say I remember specifically enjoying SNL
by the late 1990's. So that's how that goes. Patton Oswalt was on MadTV.
Once! That's the impession I got from Wikipedia earlier when I was looking
up Where I Potentially First Knew Patton Oswalt From. The point is I have
ONE BEER FOR THE NEXT ALMOST 72 HOURS OR SO WHATTA SCAM. Anyway I'll be
back with Part III in a little bit. Probably with lunch! I like
Lunch time. 2 Corn't Beef Sliders and a Beef & Barley Soup To Remember.
AND SOME SODA. And 1 more beer fo the day presumably sometime after
lunch. Will it be during End Of Entry? Or after end of entry.
NO way of knowing I'm no SoothSayer. Hmm not a lot of savory beef
barley in this specific can of soup. Som nice chunk of Carrot!
Chunk of Other vegetables. Just not a lot of nice chunk of beef.
Anyway, great, what else is going on. I think the movie Chris Farley hated
the msot was Almost Heroes. And that's okay with me it's the movie I have
very little invested in the most of movies he's done. Fascinating.
Hey that's some good soup for slurping.
What else is going on. Four more paragraphs to be done.
Maybe five! Maybe some other amount! Most likely four or five!
Five Thirty Eight determines 40,000 Possible Election Outcomes. And then
Background WebPage is created by Random Amounts of that. AND THOSE
HAUNT MY DREAMS. That'll learn 'em, that'll learn all of 'em.
Hmm wonder what it would be like to live in Montana. Three electoral
votes. Presumably around 30 people in the state. So your vote is
about 1/10th of an electoral vote. That's how I'd estimate things by
instinct! Chris Farley was from Illinois &/Or Wisconsin. I wanna say
Wisconsin. LMLTURQ. Yep all seems to check out. He was FROM
Wisconsin and then In Comedy He was FROM Chicago.
Fascinating. Hey there's a nice piece of beef In
Soup! Wonderful. Anyway very late lunch today. Woke up
very late in general! We're talkin like 11:30, 12:30 Am/Pm! The good
news is I'm almost done with lunch but its a good thing because I am
concurrently almost done with Hunger For Food. What else is going on and
crap. Maybe Bagel with/ Topping for dinner tonight! Maybe lots of
things, I Dunno! I felt bad for Gary Busey during Chris Farley documentary
for being under the impression Black Sheep was a Farley/Spade/Busey
Vehicle-Movie. Yes he is in the movie and is in several scenes but HE'S A
SUPPORTING CHARACTER AT BEST. I may be the first to point this out but
maybe this guy Ain't All There? Maybe lots o things! Hey I
just took a nice long break for some reason. We're talkin' SOLIDLY 20
Minutes. I accomplished Reading Twitter. Then I was like oh yeah
almost done with entry lets do that.
Cool! Just had a miniature chocolate which is
Healthy because it CLEANS YOUR PALATE. It's like brushing your teeth but
Tastes Better so Presumably Is Healthier? But the point is my Lunch Palate
is gone and now we're into Final Beer Palate. Which presumably will
dissolve slowly on its own and won't require another Chocolate Miniature to get
ready for Dinner Palate Whatever That May Be. Anyway part of the Chris
Farley Documentary was one of them said he would put a pad of butter on his
steak and call it a little hat and at first I was like BUTTER ON STEAK
WOW THAT'S THE LEAST HEALTHY THING I HEARD IN A DOGS AGE and then I was like
ya know what, one pad of butter on top of a steak? Maybe increases the
calories by 10%! Depending on how big the pad of butter is/how big the
steak is. So if it DOES make a big taste difference, you'd be
irresponsible NOT TO DO IT.
So I'll try that out at some point for some reason no one
is really sure of. Gotta get some more blood work done on Friday.
Or, in terms of Beerweek, New Tuesday. So I got that to look
forward to is the point. Whatta Watch when this entry is over. Maybe
some Standard Documentary Series For Me. Like a 6 Million Pound Addiction
or My Strange Overweight Life. Maybe Lotta Things! OH HEY I GOT 10
MINUTES INTO A #TALESFROMTHECRYPTSUMMERTOSHRIEKFOR YESTERDAY AND FORGOT TO PICK
IT BACK UP. So I guess I'm pot committed to watching That when this is
over! Great. It's the one with Issac Hayes! Presumably!
He sure SOUNDS like Issac Hayes. They SAY its Issac Hayes. He's what
I imagined Issac Hayes MIGHT look like! ANyway he what a shitty entry.
It's EINTERTAINMENT because you got nothing else ot do apparnelty but That's
About it! I'll see you tomorrow.
August 23, 2020
that's a good title. Too good! Must have been used, Two, MAYBE
FOUR, times already! Well Well I got salmon and rice for luch.
Too good lunch! Must have been had before One, maybe ONLY ONE, time in the
past 3 days. Is it just me or is the RNC Convention being Over 50% The
Trump Family not great optics? Kinda pathetic. Dangerous In What It
Implies, too! But pathetic that's my first impression.
What about Beau Biden he CONVENTIONED FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE.
Yeah but that's only TEN PERCENT FAMILY. Not like Trump who is
SIXTY PERCENT FAMILY. I think that was one of the most pleasing things
about 2 weeks ago, the ew days we were preoccupied with Kamala being VP.
I kinda forgot Adults Can Have Nice Decent Relationships with one another.
Trump only has family and lackeys... so just Lackeys, lets say.
Meanwhile, Biden + Harris, they have a NICE POTENTIAL FRIENDSHIP that We Could
ALL Aspire To! Hopefully! Maybe they turn out to not get along
WHAT AM I A SOOTHSAYER?
Anyway. It's scary to Want To Vote By Mail But Not
Having Done It Yet And Imagining Everyone Else In The Exact Same Boat.
Uhhh I'm definitely not doing it THIS SECOND... don't see myself doing it
tonight... this week seems like kind of a stretch... NO ONE IS GONNA DO THIS
EVERYONE IS PROBABLY AS LAZY AS ME. And I kinda Talk Myself In
Circles. I NEED MOTIVATION TO DO IT TO IT. Well in NY I gotta
wait for it to be Legalized. But BESIDES THAT! I was talking
about Pandemic Voting. NOt marijuana! Although I am also waiting for
that to be legalized, too! Maybe tackle THAT ONE Andrew Cuomo instead
of taking a Book Victory Lap. Also what kind of Jocknerds take victory
laps. Yeah you just won COOL IT. You're being a jerk by
rubbing it in, plus you just look silly, you're RUNNING A LAP WITH ABSOLUTELY NO
PAY OFF. Also Jock Nerds are Sportsmen who are Nerds About Their Sport.
And maybe even Other Sport. Also Nerd Jocks are people who play D & D
really well. E-Gamers, too. That sort of thing!
What else is going on. Oh, right. Gotta vote!
I WILL keep you updated on this situation as it progresses. I'm gonna vote
as soon as I can, lemme tell you. Or just, My Dad is definitely
planning to Vote By Mail, maybe just Team Up With Him and Take Care Of Those
Steps Alongside Him Doing It For Himself. WAIT A SECOND WTF YOU DON'T GET
NO, "I VOTED," STICKER BY MAIL IN BALLOTS DO YOU. Well that's No Bueno!
I need to accumulate more stickers What The Hell! Hmm went to
JoeBiden.com and THERE'S NOT EVEN ANY STICKERS THERE I CAN ORDER.
You just talked yourself Right Out Of A Sale! Upon further inspection
There Are Stickers to buy at JoeBiden.com. Lemme check these out in
depth HOLD UP ONE SEC. Hmm get a nice 2 Pack of, "Vinyl Stickers," for
$7.50. Obviously that's way too much money for Two Stickers, I don't
care HOW Vinyl they are, but the premise is it's Doubling As A Donation.
So I'll think about that!
I like the one that says, "No 46," presumably referring to
the Number President he would be. What else could that number mean.
Year after we won World War II. Year when Joe Biden was 3 or 4 or
something. To 46, Ate... Aten... to Have Eaten... Twelve... Hey what
else is going on and crap. Accidentally left over 1/4th of a can of
beer from Yesterday and what a great surprise. I finished it During Circle
Walking. And am about to start Official Can of Beer For Today.... Now.
What was I talking about. Oh, lunch! That's the jumping off point.
Dad bought himself and Me Shaving Set. We each get our own one! Like
a Electric Razor that we can use on ourselves to Cut Our head Hair. So I
got that to look forward to is the point. Look there's gotta be more
to, "46." MUCH more. I'll keep you updated on this situation
as it progressivos.
Yeah. "Outdoor Vinyl Stickers." I dunno what
a Vinyl Sticker is, but apparently its meant for Out Door. It's not a
Bumper Sticker I don't think, they have clearly labeled Bumper Stickers as well.
These stickers are like 7.5 inch by 3.75 inch. So that's a Nice Big
Sticker It'll Do Well covering up my Hard Acoustic Guitar Case. And it
lets people know I supported Biden's campaign Win Or Lose. Unless Trump
wins and I have to take it off for fear of reprisal from Whatever Secret Police
he's concocted. NO WAY MAN THAT'S ONE STEP TOO FAR. I'M KEEPIN
THIS BIDEN-HARRIS STICKER ON MY GUITAR CASE WIN OR LOSE YOU WANNA ROUGH ME UP
FOR IT THIS STICKER THAT IS A HILL I'M WILLING TO GET BEAT UP ON!
Well, I got that going for me in the 20% Dystopian Future
we're 20% headed forward toward. Also to consider is that I may never play
live music again. Not in front of an audience. If I play guitar 10
minutes a day in my room I guess that's still live music. It's just less
likely I'll get beat up for my Sticker Selections, staying in my room.
WAIT 2 4 6 ATTENNNN--TION. Like in Military School, they say that to the
cadets, stuff like that! When the officer wants Attention and FAST.
I'm basing all my knowledge of the military and military school on Child's Play
III. What else is going on. Oh, right. TWELVE FOURTEEN.
LOL I GET IT.
looks like in NY they will indeed allow you to vote Absntee on the basis of
Pandemic. And there's several ways to ask for a ballot, but what appears
to be the easiest one, "Electronically through our Absentee Application Portal
(COMING SOON)" is only COMING SOON. I dunno I'm gonna roll the dice and
wait for this Absentee Application Portal To Come Through. Anyway, the
Absentee Ballots'll be mailed at around Septembet 18th according to this
Website. Hey that's a day after My Lost My Virginity Birthday.
If I remember correctly. I may very well not! Definitely September,
though! I'm comfortable with that estimation ANY day of the week.
Hmm what day of the week was it. I HAVE NO IDEA. I definitely
didn't go to school the next day. Well, maybe I did. I Forget.
So yeah I'ma vote all over the place. September 18th, that's not so
bad, Got a solid 6 weeks to Turn It Around On 'Em. Even with USPS
SABOTAGE cmon SIX WEEKS YOU CAN DO THIS IN FIVE WEEKS.
Good news is I got lunch coming up in roughly 45 minutes
to 75 minutes. 75 minutes as a divider doesn't get as much love as it
should. Nice round number both in Base 10 and in Base 60/Clocks.
Hmm 46... 64 backwards... 64 is a big number... When I'm Sixty Four, 64 Bottles
OF Beer On The Wall, 64 is Around When The 1960's Started... What else
is going on and crap. Let's just split the difference and call it 55.
Seems like the responsible way to go about your Mathematics. Sixty Four
is about how many days it'll take for my Ballot to Get To Where It's Going...
I know ahead of time 5 weeks may not be enough. But I HAVE NO CHOICE.
And c'mon FIVE WEEKS I don't care how sabotaged you are FIVE WEEKS C'MON!
Spoiler Alert I DO care about how sabotaged you are AND ALSO I REALIZE that in
some cases ALREADY People have gone more than 5 weeks without their mail getting
to where its going! So basically I dunno Let's Hope THIS TIME AROUND it
works out! Fingers Crossed!
I could return my ballot in during Early Voting. I live
literally half a block from my Polling Place. Unless they close it.
I LIVE IN AN ASIAN AMERICAN NEIGHBORHOOD THEY DON'T WANT US ASIAN AMERICANS
VOTING C'MON. Anyway, YEAH! just walk on over to Elementary
School half a block a way, no one else is around presumably, drop that sucker
off! I dunno we'll see how that goes. Hey YEAH maybe if I
Drop it off in person I STILL GET SOME STICKERS. I dunno still would
rather send it in the mail. I wanna be part of 2020 Election MAIL-IN-IAL
GENERATION TO SAVE AMERICA. It's called that because it's US the
YOUNGER GENERATION using mail in voting to save America Welcome to 2020
SUCKERSsss. Also because its a pun. Hey if you didn't want That
To Happen You Shouldn't Have Made Such A Great Pun Available. Gottem!
Something along those lines. Mail In eaulz. When life gives
ya lemons you make puns, something like that. I encourage Gen X, Baby
Boomers, and People who came of age In-between them two to participate in #MailInIalsElectionToRemember
even though they're not millennials. We're ALLIES is the point. You
guys like that term and concept, right? We're ALLLL Allies. I
like that term and concept, right! I'm not mocking you! No
Wonderful. Been over eating more than usual the last
week or so. I don't know how. I end up having 700 EXTRA calories
EVEN MORE than the amount of calories I laid up for, "Snacking & Misc," which
WAS ALREADY PRETTY GENEROUS. 700 EXTRA calories? That reminds me
of McDonald's Chicken McNuggets. I dunno why. I saw the term, '700
EXTRA calories' and I just started picturing McNuggets. 700 Calories is
probably around 14-18 Nuggets I FORGET EXACTLY. Millennials know how
to Use Mail, right? I mean we all get mail all the time but Millennials
know how to CREATE mail, too, right? If not maybe we should have a dry
run. Set up a date, let's say September 17th, where we all just send a
blank Mail to a friend JUST AS PRACTICE to see if we're CAPABLE of Doing What
Needs To Be Done. Right? Sure.
Anyway, what else is going on and crap. Watched The
Grudge 2020 last night IT WAS OKAY slightly better than I expected. What
to watch 2020 tonight? I dunno have you ever heard of a little movie
called DRAG ME TO HELL? Oh, you have? You heard about it
here? Yesterday?? YESTERDAY, that's not ringing any bells... What
else is going on and crap. Ya know if only I had a larger platform.
I I RARELY have that thought but with that hashtag #MailInIalsElectionToRemember,
oh well, life is what it is. That's what I've been told. The bad
news is after I finish rice with salmon, the only real side I have for future
meals is Soup. I have 4 Hearty Beef Barley and THAT'S IT. Oh well
I'll figure something out. I have some super market onion rings in the
freezer that Were Not That Great. I'll be back in a bit!
The End Of The Entry Roughly
I sure had a 3rd Title thought of that I forogt. Needless to say it
it was no better than this one I ended up with. Needless to say I'm
having lunch right now. We're talkin Salmon + Rice. And I just
finished beer #2! Tomorrow I got beer again. Then two days without.
Then Beer Week Starts All Over Again, or what you might call, "Thursdsay."
Anyway THANK GOD I saw Trump is holding a press conference because HE CURED
COVID but is waiting 12 hours to let us in on the deal FOR SUSPENSE. Also
all the other countries are withholding Cure from their Citizens because of
SUSPENSE. Wouldn't it be Odd to have a president with CREDIBILITY.
That he doesn't just fucking make crap up every day. Yeah! REAL ODD
NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT. A little TOO Odd if you ask me.
Great. This was a good lunch. Dinner gotta be
sandwich and soup. That's just the way things are! The point is how
many people will die by taking this miracle drug that hasn't been vetted.
And how many Republicans would shrug off their deaths and be like well at
least he tried! And how much do I have to care about dumb Republicans
supporting Trump. I don't wanna care! Let em be dumb I can't stop
them from themselves! Plus I finished my lunch WHATTA JIP. I HAVE TO
WAIT 3-4 or 5 HOURS FOR DINNER WHO MADE UP THESE RULES IT HARDLY SEEMS FAIR AT
ALL. I can watch THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT. That was a fun suspensful
Sci-Fi Thriller! I need to figure out a better sandwich bread.
Wonderbread White Bread ain't got what it takes. These dinner rolls, I
don't LIKE having mini sandwiches even if I eat a proportional amount of them.
ROLLS? YEAH THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS FAR AS I KNOW. The point is
WHAT AM I TO DO.
Three more paragraphs. That's something to do!
Having drink #3 of #3 or 4 Starting.... now. Hey wonderful where am I.
Maybe watch some INTERVENTION or MY STRANGE ADDICTION or OTHER SIMILAR
DOCUMENTARY FROM THAT CHANNEL LMLTURQ. THERE'S A CHRIS FARLEY DOCUMENTARY
I'LL WATCH THAT YEAH. That was one of my most disappointing DVDs I had in
the 2000's. I had a SNL Composite DVD of Top Chris Farley sketches.
But it was only 30 or 40 minutes long. THANKS A LOT, more like THANKS FOR
NOTHING. That'll show 'em! Chris Farley was probably one of
if not THE Most Favorite Actor I had when I was in the 1990's. I dunno
why! Because That's Just The Way Film in the 1990's Went For A Single
Wonderful. MY STOMACH HURTS I ATE THE RICE TOO FAST.
It clumped up together and what am I supposed to do UNCLUMP IT and separate each
clump into 3 or 4 bites? NO if there's a clump I'M EATING THE ENTIRE CLUMP
AT ONCE just like GOD intended. What else is going on and crap.
Isn't that what happens to birds. They eat Wedding Rice too fast and their
stomachs explode? I heard that in a disreputable source but in a reputable
way. The source is Film and or TV. But the way it was DELIVERED by
the ACTORS made me BELIEVE its a real phenomenon. Anyway, what else
is going on. Oh, right, almost done here.
Great, just great. What else is going on. A
little over Ten Weeks til election day. That's Great Just Great! I
saw a trailer for the upcoming new Batman movie! It was okay it has THE
RIDDLER in it. He's LIKE the Joker but RIDDLES instead of Jokes!
That's pretty obviously the way to Conceptualize man oh man what's The
Riddler all about. I cracked The Riddle! Like the Joker but
RIDDLES. What else is going on and crap. How did Chris Farley
die. Was it a heroin overdose? I've narrowed it down to either a
Heroin Overdose or Heroin + Cocaine Overdose. LMLTURQ.
Jeez he was only 33 when he died. I'M PRACTICALLY 33 AND I'M JUST A RIDDLE
BABY. Ah NO heroin. Cocaine + Morphine. Morphine is like
Heroin. I was close!
Well can't end there. Mighty Morphine Power
Rangers. Yeesh. I wanna see an ad campaign #MailInIalsElectionToRemember
and then watch Trump tweet ITS ILLEGAL TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO VOTE ITS A
SCAM! Not really. I wanna see the ad campaign Because I
think It'll Help Drive Voter Turnout and I want high voter turnout because
people are to be voting the right smart way more than 50% of the time is my
impression for this election. Well, that's great. Gonna watch
maybe a Regular Documentary Dumb Program. Like My 6,000 Pound Life or My
VERrrrry Strange Addiction. Its a spin off but this time STRANGER
BY DEGREES OF MULTITUDE! I can re-watch Once Upon A Time In Hollywood.
I saw it In Theaters back when Outside was a real thing Lif Could Incorporate.
Now it's on Starz! One would imagine I'll get around to it at some point
over the next 2 or 3 months. Yep! I'll see you guys later.
August 22, 2020
Worst Title Ever
We'll see about that! I have The Rest Of My Life to prove today's
title wrong. A solid 50 or so years, that'd be my guess. Guessed
July 4th for Person Quarantine Ending, predicting 81 years for Personal Life
Ending. I already haven't died in Child Birth so I'm WAY ahead of
the game! Anyway had me Some Nice Overeating Today and it hasn't even
been lunch! Or, it HAS BEEN lunch, and I haven't overeaten Yet Today,
but I Would Be Planning on having A Second Lunch. In the end Too Much Food
is the point. What kinda nice communal dinner did I have last night.
Meat Loaf, that kind! I also had a nice kind of Personal #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToShriekFor
Meat Loaf EARLIER IN THE DAY YESTERDAY. We're talkin' Meat Loaf plays
a supporting character in this Episode! Also the episode is about STEAKS
AND BEEF AND WHATNOT (SPOILER ALERT-- CANNIBALISM AFOOT). But anyway his
name is Meatloaf, they're cookin' Man Steaks... all seems to be coming
together nicely. If I remember correctly Meat Loaf is The First In The
Episode to be eaten. And you'd think I'd remember correctly because I jut
saw it yesterday for the latest time and probably half a dozen times throughout
my life overall. Anyway without Personal Blogs to Reflect on Episodes
The Next Day, no one would put 2 and 2 together with Meat Loaf Getting Eaten.
Wonderful. I knew this would pay off at some point.
Well, not really. I still don't think it will, that's where I'M
At! Hey turns out I CAN WATCH STARZ: THE MAJOR MOTION HOME BOX OFFICE NON
HBO PREMIUM CHANNEL on my computer! i don't get how Streaming Services and
Whatnot allow you to share your subscription with like half a dozen people each
and It's All Kosher. Are they just banking on the average American is
so dumb that they would Go Into A Streaming Service with Neighbors so that you
greatly reduce your Overall Bill. Well it sure seems that's what
they're banking on! And they're doing pretty good business is my
impression! So I guess the moral of the paragraph is Average American
is so dumb that they don't go into streaming services with neighbors so that
they greatly reduce their Overall Bill. That, and supporting Trump.
Wonderful. My 1st Lunch/Too-Much-Snack was A FULL
BIG BUFFALO FLAVOR CHICKEN FINGER, and also a few potato chips and THREE BITES
OF SALMON and Coffee but Coffee is normal let's keep Coffee Out Of The
Conversation for now! Ya know what now that I've had some time to
settle I'm Pretty Full! So it all worked out for the best is the point.
I dunno, maybe there's some part of the Boilerplate for Streaming Services
which is like if we can prove this ain't Your Family and/or Your Household
WE'RE TAKIN' YOU TO COURT. Maybe lots of things! WHATEVER
HAPPENED TO GUY WHO KNEW MY PASSWORDS. I never heard back from him I
thought I had made a new best friend! I was wrong, though. Just
another flash in the pan Friendship To End Before It Ever Even Started.
I STILL TRUST YOU. YOU MAY BE STEALING MY PASSWORDS BUT I STILL
Something along those lines. Anyway first movie
I've watched from Starz: The Channel was Land Of The Dead. Which
always disappointed me because it's not as great a zombie movie as the Previous
Three from That Franchise but it' About Politic Of When It Was Made, The First
W. Bush Semester. And it's APT! APT I TELL YOU. Also there's
that shot where there's a zombie without a head so the guy thinks he's okay but
then the head was JUST BARELY HANGING OFF THE NECK FROM THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION
and he SWINGS HIS HEAD FORWARD and BITES THE GUY. I wonder if Romero
thought of that himself. He must have had An Entire Life Time of people
coming up to him with inane suggestions like ok Got This Great Zombie Bite
And/Or Kill Idea here it is... I guess we'll never know, George Romero
is dead now. Well if he's anything like the dead in his movies Who
Knows We May Yet Know!
So, great, we got that going for us is the point.
Meat Loaf is always great. I could eat 3 pieces comfortably without over
eating but I only get two because it only comes in sizes of 6 pieces and I
Communal Eat with Father and Mother but the point is TWO MEAT LOAFS IS STILL
PRETTY GOOD. Two meat loafs, he was in that movie with Two People
who were One Person, yuo know what I'm talking about. I'm not SUPPOSED to
talk about it but I feel like without explicitly referring to it I'm still
protected. Anyway the point is maybe Meatloaf was ALSO Tyler Durden?
Let's get some Fan Fiction going with that one. Or not, what do I
care. The main thing I got out of that movie was The Pixies' Song at the
end. Prove Me Wrong!
have too many positive options for dinner! Main Course-- Corn't Beef
Sandwich, Roast Beef Sandwich, Salmon, Roast Chicken. Side Course-- RICE,
SOUP, POTATO( KETTLE ) CHIPS. The point is I was being facetious when
talking about how I'd Remember Forever These Joe Biden DNC Convention Kettle
Chips but I've been eating a lot of Joe Biden Kettle Chips the last few days and
I can't get enough of them! Also they somehow have ZERO Cholesterol
is that even possible? Wait a minute.. Facetious. Facet Ious.
Tenet. Tenacious... THE MOVIE TENET IS RELATED TO TENACIOUS D THE BAND #SAVETHEMCHILDREN
I know, "Tenet," and, "Tenacious," are not actually related I was just being
facetious! I also know #SaveTheChildrenSummerToRemember isn't A Real Thing
To Support I was just being facetious!
Wonderful. Gonna go refill some Coffee.
Wonderful. Oh hey I just got distracted. Gonna go refill some
Coffee Now For Real. Wonderful. Hey great news! I
finally made it into Double Digits of Seasons for The Simpsons
#2020SummerToWaitEntire2020Nevermind. And it only took me closing in on
half a year. AnywayAnyway how about that Land On The Dead.
Dennis Hopper reprising his role as King Koopa more or less. Hmm John
Leguizamo also reprising his role as Luigi Mario. HOw about that, 2 of
3 stars are the same, and they play KINDA SIMILIAR ROLES (in plot in general,
and very much so In Relation To Each Other). Also his name is Luigi Mario.
In Super Mario Bros: The Film, they explain that Mario and Luigi are Brothers,
and their last name is mario. So there's Mario Mario (he wears a Red Hat!)
and Luigi Mario (green hat). Also Red Hat HMMM MAGA IS RED. The
point is We Gotta #SAVEMARIOSLEGACY Pressure Nintendo to explicitly
state Mario is not a Trump Supporter Through Time! Hmm, Joe the
Plummer, Secret Swing Voter in 2008... It's #QnonDay, c'mon, it's the day to
find Connections In Things Where None Exist. I BLAME THEM.
Something along those lines. Hey wait a second
THAT'S MY HOBBY. I can't just Lease that concept to QNON. YES QNON
PEOPLE SUFFER FROM HABITUALLY MAKING UP CONNECTIONS WHERE NONE EXIST... but they
don't OWN That Past Time! We're all allowed to do it as much as we want to
without being labeled a Qnon! So we got that going for us is the point.
What else is going on and crap. What day is it. Saturday, right?
Fantastic! Thursday is like the Beginning Day Of My Week, that's when I
get Groceries (+ Re-Up Beer). So that' either like a Monday, or a Friday,
or a Sat or Sunday... Also I used to get Super Market on either Tuesdays
or Wednesdays Pre-Pandemic... so basically it has a lot in common with EVERY
SINGLE DAY OF THE WEEK but for right now Thursday Just Be Being Thursdays
Ya FEEL ME?
Yeah! Hey it is Saturday. I must be some kind
of genius! Knowing the day of the week and whatnot. Anyway.
What's going on in the wide world of sports. I can watch LIFE FREE OR DIE
BAD BOYS III. Or at lesat I thought I could. I saw it listed
yesterday. I don't see it listed today! Maybe I Should Search
Better! Oh There It Is! Yeesh. Gotta imagine we'll have
some more Conscious Police Action Epics coming in the next few years?
Conscious of how The Police Are Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad People?
Anyway I haven't been taking my Cholesterol Medication in a week because Every
Night I'm Too Lazy To Replace Empty Container With Presumed Full Container
Located Somewhere Hidden Deep Inside My House. Probably get to it
Tomorrow, that's MY guess. Good thing I'm eating all these Kettle
Chips. That's NEGATIVE cholesterol.
Hey great another break after this paragraph. I can,
"Dig," that. Man there's a lot of Potential Watchable Movies on Starz:
That Real Life Channel That Doubles As A Streaming Service. Hard to browZe
though. Too many movies too little Options For Browsing. PANIC
ROOM? I CAN REWATCH THAT. I BELIEVE IT WAS ONE OF THE FIRST DOZEN
DVDS I EVER GOT. I put those three sentences in Italics because It Was
IMPORTANT. Lots of Fun Franchises To Remember. MIB, Spidermen, XMEN,
Bad Boys, etc. Maybe I don't wanna remember #ThiSsummerToRemember at
all, ever think of that? Well it's A LITTLE TOO LATE FOR THAT.
I've already gone through 2/3rds of the Summer MAKING IT A POINT to remember.
Oh well pot committed can't go back now. Anyway. I'll be back
in a bit!
Somewhere in the bottom third
Anyway. I have TOO MANY STARZ ENTERTAINMENT OPTIONS. It hurts my
brain! I think for now gonna Start off Primarily with HORROR movies.
I am CAPITALIZING WORDS FOR strategy. Oh well. I can watch me
some Panik Room. I can watch some Drag Me To Hell: The Movie That Is The
Movie I Think It Is. I remember a certain movie, a real movie defnitely,
one the exists. And I THINK it's Drag Me To Hell but May Jut Be Some Other
movie. I'm guessin solid 60% chance it's Drag Me To Hell, the one I've
been thinking of. Right? You guys know what I'm talking
about! Things I'm thinking of That You Have No Way Of Knowing. That
sort of thing! Also its directed by Sam Raimi IF IT IS the movie I'm
thinking of. YEP. In retrospect I Don't Remember that
much about this movie. Only that there's a 70% chance It Has an Unhappy
Scary ending. Only a 30% chance its happy! That settles that.
What else is going on in the wide world of Sportz.
What happened to my nail clipper. I had Some Nail I wanted to clip last
night but there was no nail clipper! I think I came across it this morning
but forgot I Wanted It. LMLTURQ. YEP HERE IT IS SAME PLACE I SAW IT
THIS MORNING. So I got that going for me is the point. Also
100% of Nail Clipper is used to get me some Nice Nails To Chew On and Not To
Clip Unruly Nails for Aesthetic Purpose. I'm not ashamed! I chew
nails and I use clippers to get The Best Nails! Also Last Action Hero
BLEW IT. I've seen PLENTY of action heroes since that movie. Solidly
DOZENS AND DOZENS of action heroes. Maybe not as GREAT action heroes or
maybe BETTER. Idris Elba. He's an Action Hero that REDEFINED the
archetype. I saw a trailer with Idris Elba in it 20 minutes ago.
YOU try getting Idris Elba Off The Brain!
Oh there he goes. I started thinking about
something else. But then I remembered I was supposed to be thinking of him
and I was like oh right well I had him off the brain for a sec, now he's
tangentially related to what's on the brain RIGHT NOW, but its not really ABOUT
HIM anymore, so that's how that goes. Wonderful. Lookin' like
dinner'll be Finish Roast Chicken + Have Some Soup. + MAYBE a Dinner Roll!
It's fun to eat because finger food and whatnot we already covered all of that.
Looks like that Buffalo Finger, Etc Meal Actually was One And Only Lunch!
So everything's working out like Gangbusters. I can see myself watching
some Drag Myself To Hell. There's an entire 40% of me that Doesn't Know
This Movie At All! Yeesh.
I dunno. #StarzSummerToSettleFor that sounds like
a Fun POSITIVE way to close out the rest of the summer. Anyway.
If I went to collge an College Was Regular not Pandemic College I'D BE LOOKING
FORWARD TO GOING TO COLLEGE IN AT MOST A WEEK. Oh man I can't wait!
Even considering all those variables with make this totally nonsensical and Not
Going TO happen In Reality. Even WITH all of that OH MAN HERE COMES
SOME SUITE DORM LIFE OF DORM AND SWEETIE. Because MY BRAIN isn't 100%.
The point is Yes It Would Be Wonderful To Watch Spiderman II but I have to watch
Spiderman I first and I can definitely Feel Good About Doing That but I'm not
gonna get to it in, let's say, 4 days to 2 weeks. Roughly within that time
period I'll get to some 2000's Spidermen.
Fascinating. WHAT THE HELL THERE'S A, "THE GRUDGE,"
RELASED THIS YEAR? I'm familiar with that franchise so IT MUST be good!
Wonderful. So yeah I got a #GrudgeSummerToGrudgeForThisIsAOneOffMovieWhoCares
in store for when this entry is over. MAYBE SAVE IT AND WATCH
DRUGMETOHEL AnyAWY. I dunno it doesn't matter NONE OF THIS MATTERS.
That's Starz: The Premium Channel Turned Streaming Service for ya.
None of it matters. The point is I'll be in a better place tomorrow than I
was today. That's how life goes. I've got to admit its getting
better, better all the time! It can't get no worse. That's not
what Michelle Obama has been saying to me Via DNC Convention. I dunno
I'm pot committed to The Beatles. Look Michelle Obama is in the top 5% of
Things I Trust but The Beatles, sorry, that's in the top .25% Of Things I Trust!
Anyway. Sometimes I think about my favorite bands relationship to The Best
Top Classic Rock Bands and I realize that Age wise it's Nirvana to me. If
you were born in the 60's-70's, your relationship to The Beatles, ETC YEARWISE
is about the same as I have to Nirvana. And all those other Wonderful
Bands from the Turn of the 1980/1990's. I like a lot of bands rom that
time period now And EVEN MORE WILL I in the future. But the point is
WOW I GET TO WRITE A BONUS PARAGRAPH.
I guess Nirvana=Beatles, specifically. Not just
Nirvana= Beatles AND LEd Zeppelin AND Bob Dylan AND Rolling STones, etc... to
me... No. I guess Nirvana was my Beatles except for the fact that I
Rarely Liked Nirvana THAT much that it'd be the end-all be all type band
EXPLICITLY. Also Beatles = Beatles. Everyone Know That! Gettin'
Better All The Time! Anyway lets close up this entry. Anyway I
think playing around with the GuitarBand App on my phone has made me Worse at
Guitar. They have a Mock Guitar setting where its like you can play Guitar
but Everything Is Condensed Obviously And It's All On Phone. But its
reversed for me! Set up as if it were a Righty Guitar. So I get
better at that, I'm OK at mucking around on that, but then when I go back to
Left Handed Real World Guitar my mind is all cockeye and whatnot.
THANKS A LOT iPHONE I'll SEE YOU IN HELL. Not to mention that it's
just way different than Playing Real Guitar In General so I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL
ANYWAY IRREGARDLESS OF MY HANDEDNESS.
Alright one more paragraph. What else is going on and crap.
Cockeye, that's like what they call the Peehole, right. Probably not!
But the point is hey Dinner is in like 2 hours I can knock out 2 hours like it
was nothin. Like watch some DRAGGED ME TOO HELL. What else is
crappening. A Whole Nother Beer to drink for Rest of the day! We're
talking not ZERO drinks after entry is over. We're talking ONE drinks!
I can, "dig," that. Also finishing Last Drink Of Entry Right... About....
Now ok there we go took care of that. In Stuyvesant, for some class
(presumably an English class) we all had to bring in an mp3 or something that we
liked. Or maybe just 3 people. For some reason I remember AT LEAST 2
MP3s people brought in to Show And Tell Freshman year. Nirvana-- Lithium
and Nas-- Get Down. I feel like there was almost definitely a third one I
Don't Recall but there was no more than 3 or 4 Overall. The point is
Great what a wonderful story. Did that lead me to listening Nirvana?
Yes! I can't recall if I had Nirvana Albums (At least Nevermind) and
jut never listened to it, but after Lithium I started paying more
attention to it. And I probably didn't have Nas-- Get Down: The Single
Individual Song, but then I did end up downloading it and enjoying it Many A
Time! That settles THAT. I'll see you tomorrow.
August 21, 2020
About what. I dunno I wrote that title Last Night. Or Last
Afternoon. Sometime Yesterday POST Yesterday's Entry. What's going
on in the wide world of sports. Joe Biden had a big speech last night!
I enjoyed the part where He spoke for a while and it all made sense and didn't
offend me in any way except for maybe when I was offended 5% or so when he
occasionally courted non-Progressive voters specifically And That's On Me For
The Most Part. I think Pandemic Quarantine might work out in Trump's favor
because we will Need Entertainment and there's not as much TV and/or movies
and/or Other being made right now! So we might be unconsciously thinking
well Trump'll keep us glued to our TVS. That's not an endorsement!
I think Biden is entertaining, too! We Just Don't KNOW IT YET.
Something along those lines. The point is in most
Circumstances we don't want Highest Level Of Government to be Primarily
Entertainment but Such Is The Case of Where We're At And whatnot! It was
fun to try to imagie how Trump and Co Speeches might go while watching
reasonable inspiring Democrats talk all week. I just go to in my head
vividly picturing Trump at a podium going I'M A FUCKIN' IDIOT DUHHHHH and
somehow it turns out that that's a Win with his supporters! Seems like
more or less what to expect, right? Anyway had some nice Communal
Roast Chicken last night and might have some more for lunch today! In fact
I'ma put it in the oven Right Now! Yeah! I guess the most memorable
part of yesterday was the Beau Biden stuff. It's sad because my impression
is like, if there was a Draft of Future Good Guy Competent Politician he'd be
like, forget a First Round Draft Pick, easily a top 5 pick overall!
That's how I judge and contextualize human life. If there was a Draft
of People In Whatever Field They Do WHERE WOULD THEY FALL. Prove
me wrong! Also I think I'm a solid 2nd Round Draft Pick. Early 2nd
Round. In what. I dunno! In more or less anything, I
suppose. I'm a 2nd Round Draft Pick Of All Trades.
Anyway, got that food in the oven now. Sure its on
me to Judge and Contextualize Human Life. Hmm I guess that's my
field. I'm an Early 2nd Round Draft Pick to be a future Judge and
Contextualize of Human Worthiness And Character~ Alright good to have
Some Sort Of Future, whatever it is. What else is going on and crap.
Over the lat few months my Mom has been transitioning from MSNBC 100% to CNN
Half The Time. And my main impression of CNN is every time they come back
from commercial they Hve Breaking News. It's not an exaggeration.
That's How They Do THings At CNN. TALK ABOUT BEING 5% OFFENDED. WHAT
KIND OF ASSHOLE DO YOU THINK I AM, THAT I'D BELIEVE IT'S ALWAYS BREAKING NEWS
ALL THE TIME, C'MON.
Anyway. First sip of beer commencing roughly eight
seconds from the time I started to type the word eight the firs time...
YEP CHECKED OUT COMPLETELY. What else is going on and crap. Hey
I took a look at Corned Beef I got yesterday and We're Back To Real COrn't Beef!
I tried a third of a slice! Not just does it LOOK like Corn't Beef it
tastes like Corn't Beef! So basically Things Are Looking Up As Far As I'm
Concerned. Anyway gonna continue eating chicken skin today.
If not me, Who? I had a dream last night I went to A Medieval Times which
was what I came up with yesterday or the day before when I was talking about how
I Wanna Eat Chicken Skin Because Its A Finger Food. I realized I was
thinking about Medieval Times and then later that night, or the next night,
dreamt about it! I went to Medieval Times with a girl I had a crush on 12
years ago and One Of My Favorite Podcasters. And we left before it was
over. They both wanted to get away from me. Nobody likes my company.
That Was A Fun Dream! Mid Evil sounds like
halfway through Dante's Circles Of Hell. Not the easiest Circle, not by a
long shot, but also nowhere near the hardest circle. That's how
Circles of Hell Go, right? They're judged and contextualized by how Easy
They Are To Endure. Also when I woke up from this dream this morning My
Heart Hurt. Not metaphorically. Maybe a little bit-- the content I
just shared with you WAS upsetting-- but no I woke up In Real Life and my heart
was hurting. Like it was JUST ABOUT to skip a beat. It wasn't skipping
beats yet but I could feel Skipping A Beat was RIGHT IN STORE.
Something along those lines, right?
Anyway. What's the Middlist Circle Of Hell.
ALRIGHT FIFTH CIRCLE OF HELL-- THE ONE INDIVIDUAL CIRCLE THAT'S RIGHT IN THE
MIDDLE-- ANGER. Which appears to look like it's just
Constantly Fighting Or Something On The River Styx for eternity.
That doesn't sound like fun. I guess taht's why they call it a,
"Circle Of, 'Hell." Are there circles of Heaven? Seems only
right, right? Hey there are! FFrom Dante himself!
Each Circle Of Heaven is based on a real life, "Heavenly Body," like VENUS or
THE MOON. I dunno I guess it's kinda a guilty conscience type vibe that
society is a lot more focused on yeah but where would I land if I was Going
To Hell than being like well I'm clearly a Good Guy Type Guy where in
Heaven am I ending up. Anyway, break time!
Fifth SPHERE, as they call it, of Heaven is MARS: THE DOMAIN OF THE
WARRIORS. So it's like 5th circle of Hell but Good. It's for Fighting
but I guess On Mars its a positive thing and in Hell it's No Bueno! The
point is Hell is in 2D and Heaven is in 3D. Seems to check out. I
kinda Get THat. The other point is I Have Lunch Going On Right Now!
If I was making Heaven I'd make it FOUR DIMENSIONS. No more, though, more
than four would be too confusing, too confusing to be Heaven. Hey
I'm right back to eating Whole Roast Chicken with fingers. The dream
was not only about What Had Already Happened, but What Will Continue To Happen!
Anyway what circle of Hell/Heaven is for Gluttony. The
Third Circle of Hell. And the consequence is you always have to live
when its raining and/or snowing and/or sleeting. No joke that's what
it is! Anyway, the Third SPHERE, that's not the same as you get to eat
all the crap you want all the time, it's something about LOVE. I guess
Gluttony=Love Junkies. Yep seems to check out well done Dante well
done. Also Limbo is the first circle of HELL. It's not halfway
through. It's solidly IN HELL CATEGORY! Anyway I ate a lot of
chicken skin and chicken fat and there' still more chicken (and chicken skin and
chicken fat) leftover for lunch TOMORRY. In the meantime though I'm gonna
start Beer'r #2 or ~4. I was thinking about it and Teeth are fun because
they're the only part of your Skeleton that's, "Out There." You put on a
nice smile and it's like 2% of you is Just Skeleton.
Right? Dunno what it ACCOMPLISHES but it Is Accurate
More Or Less Not 100%. Third paragraph into This Section Of Entry.
That's like Halfway Through Hell. Anyway I'm Dunzo with Dante I DON'T
BELIEVE IN THIS. Besides he's JUST SOME GUY WHAT DOES HE KNOW ABOUT HELL AND
HEAVENS. Anyway how many people are QNON. Is it like 10% of America?
Cause that's a pretty solid minority! II got there because I was gonna
be like DANTE AIN'T NO ANON PERSON WHO WROTE BIBLE HERE AND THERE and then I was
like HMM QNON IS AN ANON PERSON AS FAR AS I KNOW and then I was like HMM BEEN
WONDERING THE LAST FEW DAYS, THEY TALK ABOUT QNON A LOT LATELY, HOW MANY PEOPLE
BE QNON. And then I typed that out explicitly and that's where This
Paragraph Comes From! Fascinating. Quallhagol Qnononymous
Idea for Tim & Eric Sketch. They work with a man named James Quall.
And use puns often in his utilization. That sums that up! Or
is it Qnon Quallhologists. Either way it Doesn't Quite Work.
Well, great, what else is going on and crap. Whatta
do fo dinner tonight. Very possibly Salmon & Side. Side could be
RICE. Side could be SOUP. Probably one of those! Had too many
Kettle Chips last night during DNC CONVENTION: Part IV: Democrats: In Space.
I was like this is a once in a lifetime moment where a Speech is made halfway
along the campaign I'M GONNA WANNA BE HIGH ON KETTLE CHIPS FOR THIS ONE.
That way when my grandchildren ask where were you for that one time
Biden made his first big speech going into Presidency supposedly and hopefully
and I can be like I WAS EATING KETTLE CHIPS THAT'S THE MAIN THING YOU SHOULD
KNOW. Also, only thing! Not much to it other than the kettle chips!
You know what kids, lets go get some kettle chips RIGHT NOW. I was
talking to my Fake Future Kids. Not YOU: Website Audience: Who Presumably
Are Partly Kids. Although I do understand if you wanna go take a Kettle
Chips Break before reading next paragraph.
Wonderful. That's the most Straight Up TV I've been
watching in months and months. Parts of 4 straight nights of DNC
Convention. Now it's back to Less and Less TV! Good! I'm
better off without TV presumably! Also I watch OLD TV AND MOVIES but ON
COMPUTER. SO it's neither LIVE TV nor is it on a LITERAL TV. So
there's a lot of moving pieces in this estimation of How Much TV I Watch but the
important thing is I DO WATCH COMPUTER TV JUT MOSTLY NOT LIVE SCHEDULED COMPUTER
TV. That sums that up. Well, great, another break after this
paragraph. Whatta watch TONIGHT. More NONSCHEDULED COMPUTER TV. I
think I've made my Entertainment Consumption Habits pretty clear is the point,
we're all on the same page! Great now I gotta remember This Kettle
Chips BUllshit because I'm pot committed to telling my kids that story.
Gotta start keep tracking of stories. By the time I have kids I must have
a solid 2 or 3 dozen solid stories solidly saved-em-up. Kettle Chips,
that's ONE Solid Story. Eh. Ehnyway, I'll be back in a bit!!
Come Down To This
it don't. Either way last section of entry! Talk about the
Pot Calling The Kettle Chip. My Dad used to joke that I had a 2nd
brother named Chip. Based on My Three Sons: The Old Sitcom.
The three sons were named Rob, Mike, and Chip. I'm MIke in real life!
My older brother is Rob in real life! So basically Imaginary Ghost Brother
Named Chip, that's what MY Current Family Is. Hmm that reminds me I
wanna eat some Kettle Chips. Mmm Delicious. Been reading up on
some QNON. Apparently its ONLY 5% OF AMERICA. That's not so much!
There's a lot of plot holes on QNON, though, I gotta tell ya. What does
Qnon and/or Qnon Believers Accomplish by Turning Regular People onto these
ideas. Oh. Great Purge or whatever is coming. I now know
several months ahead of time. That'll give me time to prepare... for...
Also if it was as explosive as you'd tihnk what you
don't think the Deep State has the technology to Trace this Q Guy Posting and
Take Care Of Him if you catch my drift. NO NO NO YOU DON'T
GET IT THE DEEP STATE IS IN ON IT ON OUR SIDE. THE CURRENT DEEP STATE
IS A PLANT TO CONFUSE THE PAST DEEP STATE FROM BEING THE DEEP STATE IN POWER.
Plot Holes all over the place! Anyway what else is going on. What
kinda low self esteem do you have to have to belike THESE INSANE PEOPLE LIKE
ME SO THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS. That Insane Stupid People liking a
completely fake made up conspiracy theory version of you, and your reaction is,
well not a lot of people like me! They do! THEY GET IT!
The point is Trump is insane and d stupid but he DOES the conspiracy Theorizing
not Is Conspiracy Theorizing-UPON.
Anyway. What a wonderful coalition Trump Supporters
are. Qnoners, racists, sexists, con artists, grifters, dummies,
children, rubes, Trump's Extended Friends & Families... THE BEST
AMERICA HAS TO OFFER!!! It's a winning coalition because it's solidly
into the high 30%s of the population, which, when you cheat, is basically enough
to win. When You Have A Coalition Of The Unfortunate They let you do
it. What circle of Hell are we in. We gotta be in Limbo at
least, right? I definitely feel like, personally, I've easily been living
in A Circle and not A Sphere. And I enjoy life from time to time so it
can't be Straight-Up-Hell. Probably livin' in Limbo! Sounds about
Two paragraphs to go! Well I dunno whats the
blandest form of Heaven again? THE MOON? Alright I'm comfortable
saying Much Of My Life Is The Moon. Sometimes its The Moon,
sometimes it's Limbo, ya know you win some you lose some! What
else is going on and crap. QNON is dangerously combining Real Life And
Comic Books for its followers, I think. I came across a response to a
tweet or something about QNON where someone was like yeah I heard this
purported mob boss in Staten Island got killed by a QNON. And I was
like lol that's pretty clever for this QNon Supporter, its like the start of
a super hero movie, whispers about this, "Batman," taking the law into his own
hands, i see what this Tweeter is up to! And then I saw WAIT THIS
REALLY MAY HAVE HAPPENED? It's Comic Book stuff! Anyway, hey,
only one more paragraph to go after this one.
Everyone knows I'M THE ONLY SUPER HERO IN THIS TOWN.
And I do Nothing. Based on Nothing! No conspiracy theories
guiding me! And No Action I'm doing To Be Guided. I'm just a great
guy in CHARCTER AND CONTEXT AND JUDGEMENTING MYSELF. That's all that is.
No violence jut Thru-and-Thru great guy, high 2nd Round Draft Pick, that's what
America SHOULD BE prioritizing for it young people! Anyway Tales From
The Crypts must be in store for the rest of the day and whatnot. Maybe
one of the ones with VAMPIRES. Or WEREWOLVES. I already watched the
one about THE MUMMY 2 days ago. I don't, "Buy," that factoid about Ancient
Egyptians removing Brains by sticking Sharpness up corpse's nose. C'mon
I've seen representations of brains in Fictio Movies I don't care HOW PRECEISELY
THIS THING IS SHARP you ain't gettin' the entire brains clean out through the
nose! It's not happening! I'll see you guys later.
August 20, 2020
Guess what kinda idiot just accepted groceries + Beer 2 hours ago?
This guy, right here! I've got Two Thumbs, roughly eight other fingers or
so, yeah! Anyway lets get into it what are the points of toes.
Yes Toes are the points of feet. No but REALLY. Only thing I can
think of is if you're at the top of a cliff your toes can curl around to protect
you from falling down. That's About it! Once we Evolve Opposable Big
Toes though, Now We're Talkin'! We could be writing stuff with our hands,
drawing stuff with our feet, and then STILL have 2 Hand-Feet leftover is the
point! Anyway Great! Mom is upset about Michael Bloomberg Speaking
Tonight At DNC CONVENTION. At first I was like eh and then I
was like well yeah and then I was like but still and then I
was like i guess and then I was like however and then I was like
unfortunately and then I was like It Is What It Is. Are
we supposed to remember that phrase? Trump used it memorably to Brush off
170,000 Corona Deaths, and then Michelle Obama used it in some other context...
kinda get the feeling I'm supposed to remember this?
My Dad was just going through Old Teacher Evaluations
to Throw Them Out this morning for some reason, and I took a random packet and
MAN HE GOT SOME SWEET ASS COMMENTS. And I was like hey I wanna save
this so when I have a son he has proof of his Dead Grandfather's Quality At
Being Good At/In Life. I assume my Dad'll be dead by the time My Son
Cares Enough To Care About His Grandfather. The only grandparent I had
that made it past my Baby Years died when I was 8, and up til that age, I Was
like MAN GRANDPARENT ARE LAME WHO GIVES A FIG. So if Dad dies when
my Son is 8 he STILL NEEDS THESE RECORDS OF MY DAD BEING A GREAT GUY. I
dunno if this was already filtered into Top Comments. 90% of them were
positive. I went through 10 or so (out of 50 or 60 in this one random
envelope) and the only negative one, the entire comment was just Talk Too
Fast. Not even talks. Maybe it was more of a command than
a comment. Hey whoever is reading this, teacher, or administration, I
GOT A TIP TALK TOO FAST. Yep seems to check out!
What else is going on and crap. Did I have a Nice
Croissant for breakfast after Grocery Putting Away Of today? You BET!
Have I been having bites of Buffalo Chicken Fingers roughly once every 16
minutes? YOU CBS AFFILIATE. Not sure what the, "T," in, "BET,"
accomplishes. Black Entertainment Television. Yeah, I coulda
guessed it was Television. This entire thing is television. Nothing
about these channel on this device I'm watching AREN'T Television. And if
we're being honest it's NOT TOTALLY CRAZY for them to rebrand themselves now as
BE and it's just Black Entertainment. I THINK ITS KINDA COOL
AND I AM THE AUTHORITY ON BLACK ENTERTAINMENTY COOL FOR SOME REASON NO ONE IS
REALLY SURE OF. Wet. White Entertainment Television. Sounds
Anyway time to start beer. I think they just show
the scene in Training Day where Denzel Washington gets Ethan Hawke high on PCP
and/or Angel Dust and is like I didn't know you like to get wet because
that's what words mean I guess? Man oh man would Denzel and Ethan be
making BANK from that channel. Got some Roast Chicken for dinner
tonight. With Potato Half Spheres. How wonderful. Started
re-watching 30 Rock yesterday. It's interesting because it's the closest
thing to how I imagined The New Monkees. About 30-40% the same thing.
Which in some respects is TOTALLY DIFFERENT but also in some respects is VERY
SIMILAR. Hmm. Also you can't Train Someone IN A DAY.
Probably should be TRAINING MONTH. That's MY Hot Take.
Anyway. Bloomberg, eh? WHY I OUGHTTA... The
point is what else is going on. Hey fifth paragraph how about that.
I'm guessing This Kid Is Just Slow. I never found it to be the case that
my Dad Talk Too Fast. Even in teaching. He acted as Teacher To Me
plenty of times specifically in high school for Math.
AND I WAS ABLE TO KEEP UP JUT FINE. What kind of #EndOfSummerToEndUpWIth
will we have for the next 4 weeks. Gotta be SOMETHING presumably maybe
ALIENS. Also ALIENS: THE FRANCHISE dropped the ball because Yes That Alien
Would Be Scary but to me The Scariest Aliens Are INTELLIGENT SUPER SMART ALIENS
that could wipe out our civilization in a second because that's how Super Smart
And Advanced These Aliens Are. Not just some Dumb Alien that is Yes Very
Hostile And Dangerous but doesn't pose quite the same EXISTENTIAL risk.
So the point is #bOYCOTTDUMBALIENS.
That You Mention It
this, "Jasmine Rice," is essentially White Rice From Chinese Food Restaurant.
And this Salmon is essentially Salmon from wherever You Get Your Salmon.
Anyway what else is going on. My favorite part of Joe Biden's life was how
he rode the train three hours a day when he was A Young Man in Senate so he
could see his family in Delaware Every Day and work in Washington Every Day.
Only Pro Tip I would offer is DO YUOR SLEEPING ON TRAIN. That way its like
you're not missing ANYTHING. AM TRACK? NAH I'D SAY YOU ARE
TRAIN. TRACK IS IMPORTANT TO TRAIN BUT STILL YOU ARE TRACK I MEAN
Fascinating. I like DeJoy! ALRIGHT YOU
CAUGHT U WE'LL STOP CHEATING NOW LOL. BUT WHAT'S DONE IS DONE LOL.
LETS SEE YOU OUTWIT ME, DEJOY, MASTER CRIMINAL. I GET OFF THE HOOK BY
GIVING MY WORD (WITH MY FINGERS CROSSED!) TO STOP DOING CRIMES AND THEN YOU
FORGET ABOUT THE CRIMES ALREADY DONE (AND ME GIVING THE GO AHEAD TO CONTINUE
THOSE CRIMES BEING COMMITTED, JUT NO NEW CRIMES [REMEMBER FINGERS CROSSED ON
THAT ONE]) Sure I mix up ( and [. Brackets should be on the outside,
parenthesis on the inside! Whose gonna stop me, you? That's
DeJoy's policy position on Voter Suppression Crimes. Whose Gonna
Stop Me, You? Trump/Pence 2020 Someones gotta stop them.
Otherwise Crimes are Legal! That's not a great place to be at!
Anyway, what else is going on. Last time we got
Communal Roast Chicken I was like ya know what I haven't been eating Chicken
Skin in years I'M GONNA GO NUTS WITH THIS CHICKEN SKIN. It's a true
story I'll remember for the rest of my life along with Whose Gonna Stop Me,
You? Trump Pence 2020 as well as TALK TOO FAST. I dunno what to
make of Joe Biden's past Travel Itinerary. 90 minutes each way isn't
that much but presumably there's twice as much overall considering that I
don't think Amtrak Station is Right Outside Senate Building. Does he get
chauffeured to Amtrak Station? Does he take public transportation?
All of this has raised more questions than its answered! But the point is
anyone who is PRO Public Transportation is okay in my book! Is Amtrak
Public Transportation? I Dunno! LMTURQ! YES INDEED ITS PUBLIC
TRANSPORTATION THROUGH AND THROUGH. #EVERYBODYRIDESTHEBUSWITHBIDEN2020
For some reason I always imagine Delaware as being in the
North East as opposed to being Midway or so through East Coast. LMLTURQ.
GOogle Where Is Delaware is Delaware is Delaware is De... OH RIGHT
LMLTURQ WHAT THE HELL THIS AIN'T FAR FROM DC AT ALL. I was imagining
a longer trip. Look, fine, I'm still on board because I Like The Bus,
but... eh.. still KINDA FAR. I dunno. I thought it would
have been further. Oh well I guess we're locked in to Joe Biden, right?
They did a roll call about it a few days ago. Something with calamari.
I READ ABOUT IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA. Hmm I'd like some Fried Calamari right
abuot now. Not BOILED. Not OUT OF A BAG. They have that in
Asia. Like potato chip bags but of soft calamari. ITS TRUE I TELL
YOU! Now, if Biden says I'm gonna take the Bus EVERYWHERE I GO FROM
WHITE HOUSE, I'm not only on board with that, I will start actively
campaigning for him! We NEED BUS TO SAVE ENVIRONMENT
Well, that's great just great. What do I got in store
for rest of the day. Probably a 3 Beer'r Of A Day Today Is Most Likely.
I like eating roast chicken breast with skin because its finger food. I
went into that sentence iwth it just being an accurate representation of my
feelings, then realized it was dumb and a joke type thing, then was like well
its actually Nothing but I'm pot committed I'm already halfway through this
sentence an... wait, no, re-calibrating... re-calibrating... Okay Then Now
Almost done with the entire paragraph at this moment! So in the
end it was all worthwhile because we Made A Paragraph Along The Way. I was
kind of imagining DC--Delaware as about the same distance as NYC--Boston.
Maybe it is! LMLTURQ. NYC-->Boston = ~190 miles. Washington
DC-->Delaware = 90 MILES??? THAT'S NOT EVEN HALF THAT'S IT I'M SO UPSET I'M
CONSIDERING GETTING OFF THE JOE BIDEN 2020 TRAIN. Just Kidding pot
committed at this point. Then again 90 miles is a far way BY THE
NUMBERS to travel Back and Forth Every Day. Now I gotta check Bayside
Station--> Penn Station LIRR DISTANCE. 12.6 miles. FINE 90 IS
Mean A Thing
it a thing where you can just live on a train. Cause I'd be on board with
that! As long as half the time I could be on seats facing in the opposite
direction. For Fun and a Nice Change Of Pace! Anyway already
re-re-watched Ernest Hudson's Tale From The Crypt episode this morning.
What's next in store. I can re-re-re-watch the Jake Busey episode of Tales
From The Crypt! I can re-re-re-re-re-do Lots Of Things! Anyway
time to start Berr'r #2. It's kind of weird how it turns out, without
exaggeration, a solid majority of people who work closely with Trump were/are
criminals. It's not like a One-Off thing. It's note ven like lol
A FEW OF THEM are criminals that's emblematic of a problem! Nop!
It's A CRIMINAL ENTERPRISE! Well, a loose criminal enterprise.
It's a criminal enterprise but Especially Criminal in regards to the Members of
the Criminal Enterprise's actions on the side or the periphery of the
enterprise. Still Seems A Lot Like A Criminal Enterprise Nonetheless!
Trump Pence 2020 What Else Is Going On.
What else is going in IN DEED. My birthday is
12/12. 12x12=144. 144 IN LETTERS (1=A, 2=B, ETC) is ADD. These
are the things that I dream about at night Specifically Last Night. 100%
Accurate Last Night. Also woke up Dreaming About Doing Math On
Coronavirus Economics. How Billionaires increased their worth by a 12
figure number, and how much that would have translated it it was divided up
amongst All Americans Equally. I think it was roughly a 1 time 1K Pay
Out! And then I had to give feedback to My Dream Narrative (Freddy
Krueger?) and I said TALK TOO FAST. How much money did Michael
Bloomberg gain in the last 6 months, LMLTURQ. Oh hey he only gained
12.3 billion dollars! A net worth of 48.0-68.3 Billion Dollars. HIS
NET WORTH INCREASED BY 25% IN THREE MONTHS BECAUSE HE PROVIDED VALUABLE SERVICE
SOMEHOW. But its okay he' spending a whole less than 1/200th OF WHAT
HE JUST GAINED FROM DOING NOTHING IN THREE MONTHS AND NO PROGRESS WAS MADE THANK
TO HIM NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT to help Biden win the election.
SUPPOSEDLY! HE PROBABLY WON'T EVEN DO THAT IS MY GUESS! Good
thing he's speaking at Convention He's An American hero!
Fascinating. What else is going on. Never
100% got the point of Yachts. HEY THIS IS FANCY ITS LIKE BEING IN A
NICE ROOM BUT SURROUDED BY WATER. ALSO WORTH POSSIBLY 7 or 8 FIGURES IN
DOLLAR MONEY. MI might just be traumatized by boats. Not
Counting Log Flumes, I was on a boat once and it did not go well! We kids
were gonna jump off the boat to Swim and then I was the first one to do it and
the Boat went away and the current dragged me away and I became Lost At Sea and
then a, "Us:The Movie" Style Replacement Took Over and Well Here I Am!
Uh oh, that seems to check out. Now that I think about it I DO SORT OF
REMEMBER BEING ONE OF THE OTHER OF US'S. Oh well, live and learn.
I came out on top eventually is the important thing that matters!
Anyway, 2 more paragraphs presumably. One thing I do
like about boats is that for some reason they usually have Names and for some
reason its in tradition to have a Pun in the names. That's right up my
alley but boating alley so its right up my stream? My lake?
You know what I mean! Ugh 2 more paragraphs to go. Why do
rich people Hate Land so much. And Love Sea. It doesn't add up!
Anyway, that's another interpretation of Elliott Smith's Figure 8.
Like, ah, between 10 and 99 million dollars. 8 Figures. Gotcha!
I don't get The Old Man And The Sea. Surely the Sea is older than
this old man, I don't care How Old He Is! It'd be more proportionalite to
call it The Man And The Old Sea. Also I never read this short story
but it's about Ernie Hemmingway, right? LMLTURQ... Yep seems to check
Last paragraph! Back to #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToRemember
after this paragraph! So many options of episodes to watch! 93, If I
Remember Correctly From Last Entry's Tabulations! Did any of you ever
read Frankenstein? Do you remember when Frankenstein did all that RE-MEMBERING?!?!?!?
HAHAHEHAYEHEYEYEYEHE. At firt I meant that in terms of limbs/all
body parts but now I think it might just be be a private parts thing.
Yes he was replacing limbs with limbs but limbs aren't Members only ManJunk
is Members. But yes presumably Frankenstein's Monster Has A Dick and
presumably Frankenstein picked Only The Very Best Of Dicks For His
Frankenstein's Monster's Member. Right? Anyway what else is
going on and crap. Hey I'm Frankenstein. WOKE YOUNG
READER-- ACTUALLY NO YOU'RE FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER. Nope
THIS IS FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER [sends a Dick Pick]. You know that
Final bonus paragraph! What else is going on. The
main thing I remember about reading Frankenstein is that he was so full of self
loathing that he went to live in Antarctica or something. Yep
seems t check out that's what I'D do. Maybe he was Santa Claus.
Crossover we never realized. Santa Claus comes from Frankenstein's Monster
whose heart grew 2 sizes bigger on account of a Replacement Heart he found
frozen somewhere... I dunno... I lost track of whatever dumb thing I was saying.
Oh, right! Entry is over. 1st #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToRemember to
watch... let's say... rock band tattoo something or other. Ok that
settles it I'll Watch THAT. See you guys later!
August 19, 2020
You Ever Write Good Entries
Sometimes! Hey great news I got Beer for today! Went to get
Blood Work done and I succeeded and My Mom wanted cigarettes so I got Beer for
myself as well! Also, when they checked my weight, I was like ya know
what I wanna know where I'm at lets see. And good news-- I'm only
TWENTY POUNDS OVERWEIGHT! And a SOLID TEN POUNDS BELOW OBESITY.
I checked Internet and ~40% of America is Obese. So basically I'm right in
the median! The mode! The average? I dunno. I think the
Mode is the most relevant kinda Average in regards to this scenario. If
there are 10 Americans who are 9999999998474828888888 Pounds, that makes the
mean not that relevant. Median is pretty relevant. Mode, though,
that's the hot spot!
Anyway, I predicted in March I'd be able to Resume Life maybe
around July 4th. That turned out wrong! I'm adjusting my Fair &
Balanced Prediction to New Years. And basically the plan is to Not be
Obese by that time. And it's very possible! Also does Fox News still
use the slogan Fair and Balanced. I think that would turn off its
audience. Gone are the days when people WANTED to at least IMAGINE they
were, "Fair and Balanced," Nowadays people just want Scorched Earth That
Sorta Thing. Anyway got 2 Burritos for lunch in a little bit. One of
them has cilantro lime rice which I'm familiar with FROM CHIPOTLE so I'm
hoping it reminds meof CHIPOTLE: The Classiest Fast Food There Is.
Remember when Obama went to a Five Guys early in his presidency and it was a
scandal or something? Yeah me neither.
Anyway, great, what else is going on. Got some
CONTACTS on today you know what that's like. Had glasses on yesterday.
Even had glasses on this morning when I Left The House! Why not it's just
another layer of protection from The Bug. I always find it fun every month
or so when I'm feelin' kinda under the weather and I have to stress out like
well yeah got The Bug just my luck! And also now I'm more aware of the
fact that its not just like yeah 1% chance I die from it, too, FUCK.
And now I'm like, also, what, 10-30% chance even if I live it'll have some
lasting effect on my health-- a BAD lasting effect! Nobody know thats
how it go. They also took my temperature when I entered Hospital Building.
97.5. Nice, round number. 39/40 Degrees, right? That's
Good Math Off The Top Of My Head? LMLTURQ YEP IM A FREAKIN GENIUS
What else is going on. 156 POUNDS? YOU
MEAN I ONLY GAINED FIVE POUNDS IN THE LAST 7-8 WEEKS? THAT AIN'T NOTHIN'
BUT A THANG... or something. The point is I have it in me to Not Be Obese
When This Is Over. And one would imagine that 40% obese Americans is PRE
PANDEMIC numbers, I bet it'll be up by the time Quarantine is over. So
basically I'M WAY AHEAD OF THE GAME EVEN THOUGH I'M VERY SIGNIFICANTLY
OVERWEIGHT. Man I am so, "Over," Weight. Who cares am I right?
Doctors, potential significant others, your own self esteem, malnutriontrionist
experts... yeah but besides All Those People. Hey I'm gonna have 1st
sip of beer in MORE THAN 43 HOURS!!! Lets go. Oh, Be City!
Ok. Bity. Now what. Oh right start that beer.
Fascinating. I see Andrew Cuomo is hard at work on
a book about Coronavirus. It's like that time I wrote a book about that
time I won a basketball game halfway through the basketball game and then I got
distracted for the rest of the basketball games and we lost but to be fair we
were going to win or lose either way not dependent on me I was actually just
sitting on the bench on THE OTHER team. Sorry got B-Ball on the
Brain. Apparently they're Better People not just Better Sport.
YA GOT Better Players, Better Fans, Better ADVERTISERS. It's a real nice
crowd, the NBA Folks. I am so bad at sports that even just DRIBBLING a
basketball is way out of my comfort zone. I don't think I could handle it.
How about that!
Because What is Paragraphs Without Title
Sounds about right! I can't dribble because I, Body And Hands, are too
small for Ball. I have to use Double Hands to dribble. Anyway got
this luch going on and its okay! I'm starting to think seriously about
taking a day/days off from Entrying. But it feels WRONG. Now I know
how my Dad feels about teaching. It's a COMPLETELY POINTLESS activity but
if you stop THEN WHAT EVEN IS LIFE. The good news is either way there's,
what, 80 episodes of Tales From The Crypt? 100? LMLTURQ NINETY
THREE. AH I WAS RIGHT IN THE SWEET SPOT. I like how NBC News
deliberately distorted AOC's speech as if she was snubbing Biden and trying to
get Sanders to be president. They're not dumb enough to actively
misinterpret what was going on! If they are, that's kinda even worse for
them (although better for us), but they're not! They consciously are fucking
shit up way to go NBC NEWS YOU'RE ON MY SHIT LIST. Does that include MSNBC.
YOU BET. Does that include BET. NOT AS FAR AS I KNOW LEMME
LTURQ. NOPE BET IS PART IS CBS THEY'RE FINE FOR NOW.
Okay. What else is going on and crap. I may
not know as much about Baseball as I thought because it was a big scandal a few
days ago when a player hit a grandslam off another player. Like it was
RUDE or something. I'm sure there's an explanation that makes 40% of
sense but I DON'T KNOW IT and even with it ITS STILL 60% NONSENSE.
Anyway, third day in a row I had to get up at the Early Early Time of ~9:00 AM.
And tomorrow I'll have to do it again for Accepting Grocery Deliveries.
Anyway I watched Driving Miss Daisy II Fast II Furious and it was ALRIGHT I
GUESS I just DON'T GET IT. Hey old white Jewish lady, hey slightly
younger black chauffer.. NOTHIN ELSE HAPPENS. I can relate,
though, because I am sort of like a mid 1900's Black Chauffer to My Mom's
Miss Daisy. Except I don't know how to drive. And how 39/40 other
possible similarities are Also Nonexistant. But BESIDES All That!
Cool. What do I got for dinner tonight. I'm able
to have some SOUP if I could think of a good Primary Part Of The Meal.
Maybe enough Turkey where I can have a Turkey Sandwich. WIth the SOUP.
I like the sound of that. SOUP. Sounds fun to pronounce it one would
imagine. I'm pronouncing it In My Head. I'm not saying it Right Out
Loud but I am imagining it VERY WELL. Anyway sleeping on Mattress with
Sharpy Metal Things is a real throwback to Ancient Humans. You think CaveX
PPL were comfortable sleeping? A DINOSAUR COULD ATTACK AT ANY MOMENT. So,
just as they had to be careful about Animals Hurting Them In Their Sleep, I have
to be careful when I sleep about not cutting myself on Sharp Metal Objects.
How many animals are able to sleep peacefully compared to animals that aren't.
I mean, you get a dog, lives with the family, I think it's comfortable going to
sleep that you're not gonna fuck with it. But if you're out in the wild,
you come across some Raccoons, they DEFINITELY are on their toes THEY DON'T EVEN
SLEEP AT NIGHT FOR FEAR OF OTHERS.
I dunno. What else is going on and crap.
There's been a fair amound, 1 or 2 dozen, Tales From The Crypts that I could
take or leave at first that really grew on me. Like the one with the Guy
who retires from his job and finds out his wife is obsessed with pets and cares
more for the animals than him and then ultimately he start killing and stuffing
the pets to get her goat and then she kills him and stuffs him to get his
goat. Spoiler Alert-- Read No Further In Backwards Time. The
point is I forget. Besides taking Break From Crazyshete, also thinking
about Wanting To think about wanting to get back into making music. Don't
count on it, though! IT'S TOO DIFFICULT.
Yeah! What else is going on and crap. Another
real Not Even mediocre Entry. But Anything Is Better Than Nothing, that's
what I've been led to believe. I DUNNO WHAT KINDA SALTY SNACK TO GET FOR
GROCIERIES. Tostidos are Played Out. Real Potato Chips or Doritos
are TOO MANY CALS. Popchips AREN'T THAT GREAT. Baked Potato Chips
AREN'T GREAT. Maybe just get REAL POTATO CHIPS and throw caution to the
wind. Which is a phrase that I've been assured means something tangible
that I can't put my finger on as of this moment. HEY HOW ABOUT SOME
KETTLE CHIPS THAT'S A COMPROMISE WORTH MAKING. Alright I'm on board
with some Kettle Chips. I guess.
We'll See About That
We'll See About That. What to do about What To Watch for rest of the
day. Maybe I'll watch some Democratic Convention tonight I DUNNO but the
point is I got Many Hours before then to take care of! #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToRepeat!!!
The poitn is #MarvelSummerToRemember WAS A FUN REAL THING, #StarWarsSummerToDoSomething
WAS A REAL THING, And THE REST IS ALL JUST NONSENSE. Man oh man Summer
is over in a month now we got a Fresh Start! Fascinating. I'm
not on board with having a 39/40 Degree Temperature. Seems too low! If I
learnt anything from Boy Bands its that there is a Boy Band called 98 Degrees.
They were the least successful of The Top Boy Bands from That Period In Time as
Far AS I Know. LMLTURQ any 98 Degree'rs Make It? Oh Nick
Lachey was in it and he was a reality TV show Star for a while! Mission
Accomplished For Nick Lcshey I Guess.
Looks like Turkey Sandwich is a REAL MAJORITY POSSIBILITY FOR
DINNER. II don't, "Get," how our internal temperature is 98 degrees
roughly. I've touched 98 degree surfaces it BURNS. I've touched
myself IT IS ROoM TEMPERATURE. Even stickin' myself into myself as deep as
possible-- always feels like room temperature! Suonds like a scam to
me. Teh point is if you ever need to keep something warm in a pinch
maybe just eat it and poop it out later when its ready? I can't think
of a good scenerio where this applies but it feels like a nice MacGyver-y trick.
Oh no gotta keep this at 100 degrees Fahrenheit NOT 77 degrees! GOTTA
SWALLOW IT OR STICK IT SOMEWHERE I'M NOT 100% SURE OF.
Yep these are the days of our lives. The real point
is am I gonna watch the Ernie Hudson/Gorilla episode of Tales From The Crypt
AGAIN? YES POSSIBLY. If I could accomplish one thing in my life,
it'd probably be Turn People On To Tales From The Crypt, and, leading to the
ultimate accomplishment, create enough, "Buzz," that they Reboot it!
Also several hundred thousand more important things I'd rather do BUT AFTER
THOSE next important is Tales From The Crypt. Hey I can watch that
Tales From the Crypt where the people meet at Costume Halloween Party and
SPOILER ALERT there is a Middle and 3rd Act to that story! I relate to
that episode NOT IN A GREAT WAY but such is life sometimes we accurately relate
to things that are emblematic of negative qualities of ourselves and whatnot,
that sort of thing!
Yeah! JASMINE RICE FROM GROCERIES? IF YOU SAY
SO. I enjoyed the Spanish Yellow Rice but lost the taste for it.
Didn't particuarly like the Brown Rice. Now we're trying Jasmine Rice.
Which Looks Like Just White Rice So We'll See How That Turns Out. Need a
new bed. Need a new phone, need a new computer, need a new TV. Need
a new Play Station II (I'LL SETTLE!). Let's rank those by Which I Want
Most. Bed is last-- not getting cut up in my sleep DOESN'T ENTERTAIN ME AT
ALL! Then maybe Play Station II-- I still have a functioning Xbox 360!
Then phone, then Computer, then TV. I CRUNCHED THE NUMBERS AND NOW I HAVE
AN EXCELLENT PARAGRAPH TO SHOW FOR IT!
Anyway, what else is going on and crap. Ended up making
Spaghetti yesterday for dinner and it was delicious! So delicious I
finished what was to be left over for lunch today as a Pre-Midnight Snack for
Snacking Near Midnight last night! Hmm. Was lookin' around at DVDS I
have, saw Shrek. I always thought that was a rhyming pun with the
word Trek. Like this Shrek guy is on a Trek. A Heroe's
Journey, if you will. Gotta Think SOMETHING! Hey Remember The
Jurassic Parks? Iwas just looking around at my DVDs and I have a FOUR DVD
BOX SET of THE ORIGINAL JURASSIC PARKS. There's Jurassic Park I, there's
Jurassic Park II, there's Jurassic Park III, and there's a DVD that calls itself
BEYOND Jurassic Park which presumably has a lot of
Documentrish-of-the-making-of-the-movie-ish stuff on it, I Dunno, I never
Alright last paragraph. What's going on in the
wide world of sports. I think it would be FUN if the Drivers seat of the
car was neither the left side NOR the right side. Drivers Sit In The
Middle! You know like Go Carts But THE REAL DEAL. Elliott Smith has
an album called Figure Eight, and for some reason I'm always like Hmm
wonder if that's a Go-Kart Reference. I've never been Go-Karting but I
believe it's relatively standard to have the track be a Figure Eightish type
thing. So Elliott Smith is REALLY talking about Go Karts in this album,
last one released before his death. Yep Seems To Add Up. I'll
see you guys later.
August 18, 2020
With The Times!
looks like tonight may not even be Just One Communal Meal but POSSIBLY TWO.
And by tonight I mean, "Tonight PLUS The Rest Of The Day Before Night: The
AFternoon." Possible Salami Omelet for Lunch. Then possible Pasta
for dinner! I CAN'T EXPRESS HOW EXCITING THIS IS. Mostly because I
can't even comprehend how exciting it is. It's definitely on the Spectrum
of Exciting. I am, to some degree, "Jazzed," by it.
But is it as exciting as a Roller Coaster say an old 1970's WOODEN Roller
Coaster not a high tech METAL Roller Coaster? I dunno NOPE not as
exciting. Not as exciting as DOING the roller coaster, not even as
exciting as WAITING TO DO the roller coaster!
Yeah! Anyway haven't drank beer in roughly 20
hours or so! Another 48 hours until Next Beer. Wonderful.
Getting back into #TalseFromTheCryptProtoSummerToRemember. Getting back
into using my Bernie Sanders Coffee Mugg instead of my White Castle Coffee Mugg.
Bernie Sanders Goes To White Castle. Well, that's just one, "MASH: THE
GAME" Mix-up, and it's exactly what I was excited about this January and
February! Bernie Sanders Goes To White HOUSE. Mansion
Apartment Shack House. Look the point is I'd LOVE to live in a
Man-Shack. My family lives in the House/Mansion and I live Out Back In
The Shack. You don't wanna know what I get up to in the Shack, trust me.
SOme things better left unsaid by participants and speculated on by spec..tators...
hmm maybe eat some tater tots in my Man Shack not a bad 1st thing to inaugurate
Shack with! Anyway that's my off brand MASH-- CASH.
Castle Apartment Shack House. I coulda done without that last sentence.
Also most of the sentences beforehand, too.
Cool! Bernie Sanders might go to the White Castle
every now and then. Maybe he can be some sort of intermediary between
Biden White House & Democratic Senate. The point is I want to be Fancy on
a budget so I can only afford a White Apartment. Hmm that somehow
sounds MORE expensive. Yeah! It sure does! The point is
lets move on with our lives for some reason no one is really sure of. Am I
the only one who is, "jazzed," by the idea that rich people are
presumably leaving New York for good? Great! Wonderful! More
room for Folk Like Me! BUT WE LOSE THEIR SWEET SWEET TAX DOLLARS.
Folk like me are still around, though! And I pay Taxes! Presumably!
We'll do just fine is the point. And besides if we're really struggling we
could just get a job at Coyote Ugly. I saw a documentry about it.
A long time ago. Hmm.
I remember thinking that movie would be TITILLATING.
I was around 9 or 10 when it came out? And I was like hmm lady dancing
on top of bars this is as close as I've gotten to pornography in my young tiny
pre-using internet for pornography life. Anyway finished All
CrapCornBeef for Sandwiches! Just a couple of slices left over, only
suitable for Snackings! So I got that going for me. Tried putting it
in the oven last night for dinner and it helped A BIT. So that's how that
goes. Gotta put together order for Thursday Super Market. Gotta get
blood work done tomorrow. I feel like Evil Knievel every time I leave the
house. By which I mean I suddenly get the strange sensation my first name
rhymes with my second and/or third name. Yeah!
Anyawy, fifth paragraph! Another 1/3rd of Entrying
done when this is done! Anyway I watched the first half of DNC Convention:
Monday Edition. It was okay! I was inspired well enough and whatnot.
When do they air the Second Half of DNC Convention: Monday Edition: The Edition
They Just Showed Last Night. Later today? The weekend? That
makes sense. If If no Omelet for Lunch today maybe some sort of French
Bread Pizza. Presumably the French Bread Pizza I Have In My Freezer.
It's the closest thing I have to Any Sort Of French Bread Pizza BY FAR!
Anyway what kinda stuff do I have in store for Late Afternoon And Evening Night.
More Tales From tHe Crypt maybe! You don't change horses in midstream.
You'd rarely get the opportunity. How often are on on a horse midstream
and then suddenly there's This Other, UNMANNED horse, just like hey here if
you want it. Never, that's who! Why, then what! Nevermind,
that's my guess!
That's A Sweet Title
sort of Fox News Joke about Kamala Harris (Kumar) Going To White House (Castle?)
Nah that's not Fox News' Style. Maybe a Rushward Limbarg or something.
Also WHERE IS THE HAROLD? IT DOESN'T WORK WITH NO HAROLD. WAIT
THE FUCK HARRIS. Mam this has been a Scam The Entire
Time! Something like that. The point is SALAMI OMELET
GOING ON as we speak. As I speak. As I type. And speak the
words in my Head More Or Less. I didn't even have to cook it at all!
0%! Except for toasting the bread! 5-10%! I also put salt and
pepper on it because It Couldn't Hurt! 7.5-15%! My favorite thing to
do is when you have meals that are commonly eaten As Platter AND as sandwich, I
go halfway, and Eat Sandwich FOr The Most Part AT MY OWN PACE. We're
talkin' its a platter, but 50% of the Bites I combine Egg and Bread into one.
I'M INDUSTRIOUS I DO THINKGS MYSELF.
Cool! What else is going on in the wide world of
sports. Also whose using the phrase Wide World othe than Flat
Earthers. If the Earth is More Or Less Spherical there's no WIDENESS to
spheres. C'mon! Anyway now every time I go to lie down on my bed I'm
careful about this Metal Sticking Out. And I go to lie down on my bed
60, 80 times a day? So basically it's a huge hassle is the point I'm
trying to make. I'd estimate Pasta Dinner is around a 1 in 3 shot.
I'd estimate lots o things. Usually with the intent to estimate them in a
correct type fashion. NO use estimating something at something that I
believe to be inaccurate!
Anyway. Succeeded in Not Doing A Zoom for my Psyhitary
Appointment today. I'll Never Show My Face Again To The Outside World If
It Kills Me! Hmm, showing my face to the outside world, might not kill
me but could aid and abet the killing of OTHER PEOPLE. Cause of Masks.
Virus. Showing my face gives them Death. I am Grim Reaper and all
through the house. Wait what was I talking about again? Oh,
right, killing people. I'm against it. Whats going on in the
wide world of Flat Earth Politics. Something about Collusion between Trump
and Russia Confirmed Even More. Postmaster General gave a statement where
its like ya got us we'll stop cheating I PROMISE [except without explicitly
promising]. Also if Susan B Anthony was alive is there a chance she'd
accept Trump's Pardon? She'd probably write a book about it called PARDON
ME?!?!? That'd be my first guess, at least.
I dunno. Diggin' the idea of some #TalesFromTheCryptSummerToSHRIEKFor.
#ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor was different. It was, "Screaming." TFTC
is, "SHRIEKING." I don't have to explain to you how different Screaming is
from Shrieking. Maybe I do. No one ever explicitly told me one
way or the other if I have to explain it to you or not. So, for now, I'm
operating under the assumption That I Don't. The point is I forget what I
was talking about. Also pardoning Susan B Anthony is kinda weird because
NEVER in the history books do they even talk about Susan B Anthony being
arrested as a tarnish on her record. It's not like Trump pardoning her'll
be like FINALLY SUSAN B ANTHONY'S NAME IS CLEARED. Yeah we get she
was an America Hero Thanks. Is there irony in the fact of the sitting
American president sabotaging upcoming election on roughly one or two dozen
fronts and then trying to score political points by Givin' Some Skin to a person
who helped lead to the Greatest Increase In Franchisement in American History
(Probably, right? That sounds smart and correct BUT IT'S JUST A GUESS!)
Also I'm assuming they change it, because they did for the
Primary a few months ago, but in New York I'm under the impression I Cannot Vote
By Mail By Saying It's Because of Coronavirus Pandemic. So we got that
going for us is the point. I am unable to vote without egregiously
risking my health. But what can I do about it I'm just one man!
With zero votes! I don't like the sound of that. It looks like
they're in the process of Franchising me and my NY Friends but as of now Not
Yet. Also if I could own one fast food franchise it'd be Chipotle because
it's CLASSY. Anyway another break in a minute. Also get a load of
this what are Mail Sorting Machines. How does a machine know how to
sort meal exactly. Are we being wise NOT getting rid of them? Seems
like they're smart enough to usurp us as Apex Predator on planet Earth these
Sorting Machines need to be taken care of NOW not tomorrow not AFTER BREAKFAST
Come Up With Anything Else Sorry
time for Part III of Entry! I dunno whatta do. Can't drink!
Not alcohol, at least! I'm drinking WATER! That's somethin' at
least! Popped a Ritalin just to see what will happen. I'm
guessing Nothing That Noticeable. Great. Just added 80% of what
I could think of to Supermarket Delivery. Well, 100% of what I could
think of. Which is 80% of what I want In The Abstractulation.
Getting Corn't Beef again but I'm 79-81% sure its The Good Kind this time
around. Anyway I dunno. Air conditioning been working the last few
days without us having to replace it. Which is good! That's how Home
Improvement works. You want things to work because it costs money and TIME
and EFFORT to replace things. If I learnt anything from that Documentary
it's that. Also that Tim Allen is a jerk or somethin', I dunno. Tim
Allen gotta be a surprise Drop In for the RNC Convention, right? Seems
about the best they could do.
Wonderful. Biden creepin' up in the odds on 538,
creepin' down in the odds on The Economist, presumably is making some sort
of movement and/or staying still in The Exact Real Life Odds that are The
Ultimate Odds that are 100% Accurate Somehow... I forget what I was
talking about. Did I use to watch Home Improvement? Yes!
Do I know why? No! Best guess is that it was on directly before or
after The Simpsons on weekdays! ZOOM IMPROV SHOWS AND YOUR TEAM NAME IS
HOME IMPROVMENT. Or, just, regular improv shows, and your team
name is HOME IMPROVMENT. Either way it's gonna suck. You're
not that great at improv is my guess, and your friends and/or co-workers and/or
colleagues and/or contemporaries are probably EVEN WORSE THAN YOU!
Hey only three more paragraphs. Then its on to
#TalesFromTheCryptSummerToEndAllSummersToRemeber. At least for 2 or 3
epsodes! Why, I can watch the one with Ernie Hudson and a Gorilla. I
can watch the one with... well I got ONE queued up is teh point, that's not
so bad. Right? Probably. So what else is going on.
Maybe watch some more DNC Convention tonight. Maybe not! I've got
plenty of options believe you me. Like either Do That or Not Do That.
I've narrowed it down to two things!! I need to finish this entry, though,
c'mon. Just two and a half paragraphs, how hard could that be? I've
already done it FIVE or so times this entry! Lemme Crunch Them Numbers...
Yep seems to check out 100% I'm 5/6ths into the entry, hmm, when you ut it That
way it doesn't seem like that much!
Now I'm 13/15ths into the entry. FINALLY we're
making some progress! What else is going on and crap.
1.3/1.5 into the entry to make it EASIER to conceptualize. All those times
you have to do something one and a half times? It's like you've alreday
done... at this point into this paragraph... 1 and a THIRD times! THAT'S
HARDLY NOTHIN' LEFT OVER! Anyway. I started watching #LeprahcunSummerToShriekFor
Leprechaun IV: Leprechaun In Space and my main point of contention with it isb
WHY. ALso, that's not just me being dumb. That's the name
of the movie (and its an appropriate name for what happens! Leprechaun Four: In
Space. Also that's how its stylized. Not Leprechaun Four:
Leprechaun In space. Just ...: IN SPACE.
The point is this is the last paragraph. Wonder if
I could get some NonHealthy Gum from FreshDirect. Only one way to find
out. Just sit tight and wait for someone to tell me. FINE I'LL
CHECK MYSELF. YEAH THEY GOT GUM NOW THE QUESTION IS DO THEY HAVE
CROISSANTS. YEAH THEY HAVE CROISSANTS NOW THE QUESTION IS DO I WANT
CROISSANTS. I DON'T THINK I DO BUT I'M GONNA ADD IT TO THE CART ANWAY
BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY. Anway, great, just great, now I've got Improv
on the brain. Do I take improv classes when Quarnatine is over?
No, of course not, why would I even consider it. Hmm that's a very
good counter arguement. Now I don't know WHAT to think! The point is
I'll see you guys tomorrow presumably.
August 17, 2020
To See Here
news-- I tried Microwaving Hammish Cornt Beef and it's A BIT closer to Corn't
Beef that way. Also I should make it clear, under most circumstances, I
GOT NO BEEF WITH HAM! But from this Supermarket Their REAL Ham was
crap, and this FAKE CORN'T BEEF HAM is JUST AS CRAP. What's going on in
the wide world of Conventions. Oh. Right! The one starting today!
I've gone MONTHS without conventions so it's amazing I'd Forget even if just for
a moment. I gotta be honest I'm having a lot of fun with this one Main
Particular Scab. The one obstructed by leg hair. It makes it all the
more challenging and I LOVE a Scab Challenge. ALso, three beers for
today! Then 2 days off! Then BACK TO REAL CORN'T BEEF C'MON LETS GET
What else is going on. Had a nice phone call
appointment with Therapist. The main crux of it was Her Berating Me for
not using Zoom. LOOK I DON'T WANT THE PHONE INTRANET DETABASE TO SEE ME
DOING REMOTE THERAPY. YOU SHAN'T, NEY, CAN'T, NO, CKRANT, MAKE ME!
MAN OH MAN AM I DIGGIN' [at] THIS SCAB MAN OH MAN WHAT AN APPROPRIATE
PUN. Was watching some of that Wrestling Documentary from ~1999:
Beyond The Mat. I think if the WWE (then the WWF) didn't lose the rights
to the name WWF from the Worldw Wld'n'OutLife Foundation, they'd be doing 20x as
better business. LOSING COURT BATTLE TO A PUNCH OF PANDAS? NOT A
GREAT, "LOOK," FOR AN EDGY PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING STORY EMPIRE.
Oh you guys are just a bunch of pandas. Is that
an expression. I'd be a baby panda, sure, why not. They're
CHARMING animals! CHARMING AS FUCK. NO one's gonna argue with a
panda, that's my hot take. So there was a Big Key Poll that had Biden only
up by 4 on Trump. On the other hand, the other 5 Key Polls from today and
yesterday all had Biden up by between 9 and 12. I say We VOTE FOR ONE
OF THE POLLS THAT HAS HIM UP BY 12. If I had to pick A Results out of
these 6 Possibilities (Biden's Campaign Slogan!) I'd pick one of the Biden +12s.
But, yeah, the point is I'm on board with Biden-Harris 2020 POSSIBILITIES!
It's very non-fatalistic. Anything can happen! And much of the
Anythings are Relatively Good Things that could happen! I LIKE THOSE ODDS
LEMME PUT IT ALL ON RED 32. Oh wait sorry I thought this Election Was a
Casino Game. I hope not because the house always wins. I
hope it's the House of Representatives in this case. They're The House I'm
on board with. White House, though? Maybe they win IN THE ABSTRACT
by DUMPING TRUMP the worst resident White House Ever Had. Probably stunk
up the place. Gotta imagine all the Ghosts in The White House are just
holdin' their breath waiting to get rid of Trump.
Lots of good options for lunch. LOTS. Maybe a
bagel with some Cream't Cheese or But'ter. That's in my mind right now for
some reaosn no one is really sure of. Got another phone call appointment
tomorrow morning. Today was with my therapist. Tomorrow is with my
PSYCHIATRIST! What's the difference? The appointments are EXACTLY
100% THE SAME but the psychiatrist is able to prescribe and give me refills of
medication After The Fact. I think if Trump is winning with the Key
Swing Vote of Boaters, we need Biden to court the Swing Voters of
RVers. I wanna see RV PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT BIDEN ORGANIZE A CONVOY
AND I WANNA SEE IT YESTERDAY. Well, that's too hard, you can't go
back in time. I wanna see it maybe 4-6 weeks, gotta give you guys
some time to prepare.
"RVers?" TrumpBoats DON'T GO DOWN RiVERS
YOU'RE CONFUSED SOMEWHERE. Is it possible these TrumpBoaters are on a
narrative not unlike Heart of Darkness and/or Apocalypse Now and Trump is Kurtz
and then he wins and/or loses the election and the newspaper headline is like
THE HORROR, THE HORROR. Yep that sounds like it checks out more or
less. Anyway. What's the countdown to election day. What
this year. Hmm. Does Trump think the 2016, "Scandal," of
Clinton's E-mails upset people just because they don't like ANYTHING to do
with mail? So now he's going back the playbook and he's like hmm
these folks, something with mail, helped me first time, only makes sense it'll
help me again! My guess is no Trump isn't clever enough to put one
and one together like that.
Just got an e-mail from Team Joe Harris and the headline
was WE BET THIS GIF IS GOING TO MAKE YOU WANT TO DONATE $5! And I
was like yea you know what I'll take that bet. Then no one
responded because No One Was There but I opened the e-mail and saw the gif and
it's of Biden &Kamala walking through a doorway. With masks on. And
in no way did it make me go OH MAN I GOTTA DONATE 5 DOLLARS TO THAT!
Not even a little! Biden and Harris, sitting in a tree, K A M A L A ing...
Also why were young fanciers-of-each-other salways sitting in trees while
kissing. And why is that an important part of the story. DOESN'T ADD
UP. Anyway time to take Break #1 of entry. I'll be back here in a
little bit! Hmm maybe I should donate 5 dollars to Team Kamala Harris
Featuring Joe Biden As President. So I guess they win, they tricked
me. It wasn't the GIF explicitly but abstractly it's all part of the same
plan that lured me in LIKE A SUCKER. Ok I'll be back in a bit.
Right Now I Remember
Enjoying some lunch! We're talkin' Toas't'd Bagel with Cream't Cheese.
Perfect amount of cream cheese for Maximum Enjoyment! A good fair amount,
didn't take too long to spread because it didn't need to be Absorbed by Bagel,
and not Too Much that it's Too Much! Anyway how are things going.
Whose talking today at the North Carolina Convention. Michael Jordan?
He's a famous North Carolinian I learnt about it from Documentary. Anyway
who is REALLY talking today worth while. I know Michelle Obama. Lots
of good people. But I don't knwo WHEN. And I don't know WHERE.
I know GENERALLY WHEN-- today. I know GENERALLY WHERE-- Hopefully
somewhere on My Internet. The rest I'll have to play by ear
Ok, so we know Michael Jordan for sure, I'll just take the
rest as it comes. At what point into Biden Presidency do they start
speculating he's having a relationship with Kamala Harris at Fox News. Day
One? Pre-Day One? Day Two? I've narrowed it down to those
three things. It's not NATURAL for a man to work with a woman just ask
CURRENT Vice President IT DOESN'T ADD UP! DAMNIT I FINISHED THE
BAGEL. I enjoyed it and everything But Now It's Gone! I have
some Creamt Cheese left but I DON'T WANNA JUST EAT STRAIGHT CREAM CHEESE WHAT AM
I AN ANIMAL? MAYBE. I'LL HAVE TO LOOK INTO THAT ONE. CAN I
HAVE ANOTHER BAGEL FOR DINNER? NO THERE'S SIMPLY NOT ENOUGH!
Okay, sure, what else is going on. Where is Virtual DNC
headquartered Virtually? Milwaukee? That's near where Wayne's World
Lives. If I remember correctly. Which I believe I do. It was a
Key Plot Point where Aerosmith I Believe were talking about the origins of
Milwaukee. Best option for dinner is Corn't Beef & Soup. Not looking
forward to Corn't Beef, but I AM looking forward to Getting Soup't Up. And
I have to eat the Corn't Beef AT SOME POINT. It's called being an Adult
YOU EAT WHAT YOU GET THERE ARE STARVING PEOPLE ALL OVER THE PLACE. AND IF
I DON'T CONTINUE TO OVEREAT THINGS I DON'T EVEN REALLY WANT, THEN PRESUMABLY
STARVING PEOPLE WILL SUFFER MORE SOMEHOW. DON'T HAVE ALL THE DEETS
ON THAT ONE BUT BELIEVE ME ITS GOTTA CHECK OUT.
Okay, sure. Only about a month left of #CrazysheetSummersToRememberToRemember.
I feel like HORROR Franchise Maybe Alien(s)? Those are GOOD movies that
I've tried watching SEVERAL TIMES but never ACHIEVED FULL PAYING ATTENTION
POTENTIAL. Hmm. #AlienSummerToSpaceFor. My therapist was vrey happy
when I told her I had left the house to get my Mom cigarettes. That's the
most proud she's been of me in months. Go Figure! What's a
NICE FUN LUNCH I could have that involves me Not Having To Eat Corn'T Beef.
I think I got French Bread Pizza in the Freezer. Ney-- I KNOW. I put
it there myself a few days ago! I HAVE TOTAL RECALL OF THIS ENTIRE
SITUATION. HOW ABOUT A NICE BAG O POPCORN BEEN A WHILE SINCE I HAD A NICE
BAG OF POPCORN. Oh well such is life. Huh? I mean.
Oh. Right, one more paragraph of this section!
Cool! Michael Jordan got in trouble for not
endorsing the guy who ran against Jesse Helms and he was like Republicans buy
sneakers, too. You know what? BASKETBALL PLAYERS GO TO HELL,
TOO. That'll show him for this situation that happened 30 years ago
that I am aware of because of 35 seconds on an otherwise unrelated Documentary
Program! Hmm just googled Jesse Helps and google suggested I should
google Jessica Alba instead and you know what GOOGLE AIN'T WRONG!
But in the mean time, c'mon, gotta close up with this section of entry.
Oh, hey, i just already did that! That's great. I'll be back with
Part III in a little bit!
LOOK RIGHT BEHIND YOU
Gotcha! Yuggh. EconomistElectionForecast has Biden down to
87% winning instead of As High As 92%? WHAT THE HELL IS THIS BULLSHIT
WHATTA SCAM LETS KILL OURSELVES. The good news is I just took a bath!
And I listened to a reallllll Tracks 1 Through 4 of The Uppers: That One Album I
Enjoy. I likes me some listening to music while underwater. It's all
VIBRATIONS THROUGH FLUIDS. Pretty sure tehre are fluids Insides Our
Ears. I don't have ALL the details but that's the impression I'm
under. Here's a fun conspiracy theory to start-- Kamala Harris is actually
a Man Named Harris Kamala. It's funny because it MAKES you THINK.
ANd besides, it kinda checks out, because WHERE'S HER GENDER CERTIFICATE.
WHAT ARE THEIR FIRST NAMES. I MEAN MIDDLE NAMES. JOE AND KAMALA.
I NEED TO KNOW THEIR MIDDLE NAMES. HAAHA JOSEPH ROBINETTE BIDEN.
MAN OH MAN WAS HE RAZZED ON THE SCHOOL YARDS. I'm happy about it.
It builds character! I'm 100% on board With Joe Biden & The Robinettes.
Ok, now lets check Kamala. DEVI? IS THAT LIKE DAVI? I HAD A
CLASSMATES WHOSE LAST NAME WAS DAVI IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL? I ASSUME THESE
TWO ARE CONNECTED?
Fascinating. Robin can be a MASCULINE name.
The most useless pathetic excuse for a super hero in the entire 20th century was
named Robin. That we KNOW of. What else is going on and crap.
There was a song called Rockin' Robbin by, I wanna say, Robert Johnson?
Nope it was by Bobby Day. Bobby Day? That doesn't seem to
check out. I'm gonna have to look into this a bit more extensively later
on. For some reason that's one of the ~1-2 dozen songs my Mom
downloaded from internet in late 1990's. Or maybe she had it on some sort
of CD Collection. I Don't have all the answers but I had it on MP3 for
some reason no one is really sure of! What about Bobby Ray a.k.a. B.O.B.
is he the SON of Bobby Day? You know, because in America we keep the
same First Names of our parents and our last names are different but Must Rhyme.
You know that sort of thing. Also, mathmatically speaking, it'd have to be
Jeez. Why do I know who B.O.B. is? Because he
was on Z-100 in 2012 when I had Wireless AM/FM when I was In Hospital.
That sums that up. Hmm I could watch Citizen Kane on HBOMAX, but I
already know the surprising ending that he dies in the beginning. So
WHAT'S THE POINT. The only 2 Full Album CDs I remember my Mom having were
a Double Disc of Rolling Stones Greatest Hits (i think it was titled "Hot Rocks
Or Something"") and a Burn't CD of Bob Dylan's mid-late 1990's classic
Time Out Of Mind. That's about it. And she programmed it so when
the Computer turned on it played a 5 second clip of Start Me Up! Hm.
I guess she was more industrious in her mid to late 40's than I remember her
being Now when she's an Ol' Lady. Funny how that goes. The
Rolling Stones are all well and good but I DON'T KNOW I DON'T, "IDENTIFY," WITH
THEM AS MUCH AS OTHER BANDS. I GET IT but IT AIN'T ME. OR IS IT.
I DUNNO ANYMORE, I DUNNO ANYTHING ANYMORE!
2 paragraphs to go! Before taking my bath there were
these tiny bugs crawling up from out of the drain. And I took pleasure in
the knowledge that by starting up the water I'm SENDING YOU BUGS BACK DOWN TO
HELL WHERE YOU BELONG. TELL 'EM THE ROLLING STONES SENT YA! Hmm
turns out I identify more with The Rolling Stones than I had thought.
I liked that part in the Alien Prometheus Prequel where its like The Super Alien
was like some sort of Super Humanoid but then he gets spliced with something
else and that's where Alien gets its start. It's FUNNY because IT MAKES
YOU THINK. Maybe I can watch Driving Missus Daisy on HBOMAX. I
forget which one teaches wihch one how to read. My instinct is Old White
Lady teaches Gettin-There-In-Years Black Chauffer how to read. But I think
I'd prefer it if He teaches Her how to read. Maybe this time around
when I watch it they do it that way. Variety is the spice of life,
everyone know that!
Probably. Last paragraph! Wonderful. Gonna
watch Driving Missus Dasisy MAD! That aws the original title and Morgan
Freeman's character was originally more of a cut up always gettin' Missus
Daisies GOAT and they had to change it because nobody liked any of the
characters or plot or especially the setting. Huh. Also Dan
Ackeroid BRINGS DOWN THE HOUSE as Missus Daisy's son (In both Real Version and
Fake Version). So there's that, too! I like to think about Morgan
Freeman's Paternal Ancestors who adopted the name Freeman after Slavery under
the premise of OK THIS IS JUST IN CASE, DON'T YOU BE GETTING ANY IDEAS, I'M
PUTTIN IT FRONT AND CENTER FREE & MAN GOT THAT?!?!
It's great strategy! I'm not joking! Possibly THE BEST name such a
person could have picked. Anyway, I'll see you guys tomorrow.
August 16, 2020
Like The Sound Of That
Here's what I do like the sound of, though... Hmm. HMM.
I don't particularly like the sound of anything. I I guess several
hundred bands/songwriters songs. I like the sounds of those.
Otherwise, "Hearing Stuff?" I could do with out it. Also is
It A Scam where you can Hear Stuff Even If You're Deaf by holding your hear to
some Vibrating Surface. You get the sense through VIBRATION (Which is what
hearing is, right? Vibration in your earholes?) but this time around it
VIBRATES YOUR ENTIRE BODY. I remember when I actually used to play guitar,
you could be playing unplugged electric guitar, and if its stacked up against a
wall while you're playing, you can just HEAR the vibrations bounce back off the
wall into Your Body. I may not have all the science right on this.
Also if there was A Scam where deaf people could hear
kinda seems like we'd know about it? They'd have figured it out by
NOW, right? I don't like the guy who invented ears. Seems too easy
to impale your brain with something. Also who designed Q Tips? I
think it's relatively common knowledge Among Adults that No you're Really Not
supposed to stick it in there, just sort of Swab AROUND The earlobe.
The way its designed, of course your first thought is I gotta Stab Myself
Real Good With One Of These Sticks! I mean, not TOO Far. But just
some LIGHT stabbing, getting a feel for the water, not CANNONBALLING right in on
the first shot! Hey that reminds me of something that was supposed to
be a Save-Em-UP but forgot until just now-- I wonder if, as some people
have innie or outtie belly buttons-- does anyone have outtie assholes.
It's Funny because It Makes You THINK.
Well, great. Nice lunch planned. We're talkin'
part II of II of BBQ Salmon and Mediocre Potato Cuts. Gonna have that with
Part II of III of Entry. #DickVanDykeSummerToSettleFor is FINALLY back in
business. We're talkin' I watched 2.5 episodes for the first time in
roughly 2.5 WEEKS. So I got that going for me. In the mean
time Every Morning I wake up to more and more Scabbed Areas across my legs
(Usually Knee Area and Under). I'm GUESSING it has to do with this one
metal part thing sticking out of my bed. But, even then, I must be movin'
around A LOT in my sleep. It's hittin' different areas of the bodies!
Well, Knee and Down is one area--BUT THERE'S TWO OF THEM. EXPLAIN
THAT ONE WHY DON'T YA. Oh well what can I do about it.
Not so fun to pick at Scabbed Areas which are otherwise Hairy. Hair keeps
gettin in the way of pickin' some clean scabs.
Yep that seems to check out. Now sure why we
evolved to have SOME hair on extremities like arms and legs. It's nowhere
near enough to Keep Us Warm. It's just There. Maybe we're
still in the process of UNevolving it. We started off with All The Hairs
and as generation and generation passed for Mankind, Less And Less Hairy Legs!
Only explanation that makes sense to ME. I mean you wanna talk about
survival of the fittest, in the era of Global Warming, all these Somewhat Hairy
Animals are gonna start dying off! Or, if they do their best, evolving
into Less Hairy Animals. That's Where We're At In History Of
The World Part I. The bad news is I Had All That Fried Chicken and not
even ONCE did I Fry It. Well, it was already fried. Not ONCE
did I put it in oven at BAKE or Roast or BROAST to ACTIVATE the inherent
crispiness in your Fried Chickens.
Anyway, what else is going on. Solidly into 5 months of
Nonstop Entries. Well, they stop All The Time. But Nonstop Days
Going By With An Entry Per Each Individual Day. Except for in other time
zones. THen you may, on occasion, get 2 EPISODES per day and go a
day without a single EPISODE. What's the update on the news that Trump
doesn't understand time zones? Have we ever gotten confirmation that
someone finally explained them to him? Also is that a, "Hole," in the,
"Logic," of Flat Earth Theory? Why would Time Zones Be A Thing In, "Flat
Earth?" I, "Don't Know," Because I'm Not Stupid Enough To Contemplate,
"Flat Earth," As If It Was A, "Real Thing," So I Can't Even, "Imagine."
Wonderful. I DO believe in Faked Moon Landing
though. WHERE DID THAT CAMERA COME FROM THAT SHOWS US THE GUY WALKING
ON THE MOON FOR THE FIRST TIME. EITHER SOMEONE SET IT UP FIRST (THE
REAL FIRST GUY) OR IT'S A SCAM! That's one of those things I Know
Is Stupid But I Feel Is Somehow Smart In A Stupid Way. Also sure
there's a logical explanation I JUST DON'T KNOW IT. The point is if
they don't have a Follow up 10 episode Documentary to The Last Dance about
LeBron James HOW DO THEY EVER EXPECT TO SEAL THE DEAL AND MAKE US ALL NBA FANS.
NOWHERE, THAT'S WHO! WHATEVER, THAT'S WHY! WAIT FOR IT, THAT'S
WHEN! Yeah. That's the main Outdoor Activity you do when
you're in Mental Hospital. You get Fresh Air Break once a day (20 minutes?
30 minutes) and there's a basketball Hoop Stand which is the main activity
(other than standing around. Or walking around.) And there's HALF A
DOZEN BASKETBALLS of which 4 are COMPLETELY out of air and 2 which are inflated
enough that they LOOK like basketballs but the Bounce to 'em ain't 100%.
Something along those lines. Also, the last time I was In Hospital was
during LINSANITY. I knew from Special wireless AM/FM Radio I Had With
Me that I listened to at night! Which seems kinda appropriate now that
I think about it.
You For That
say I would be having lunch with Part II of tne entry? I meant Part III.
No I didn't. I Surely MEANT Part II, I just changed my mind after the
fact. That Settles That. Great what else ya got going on.
If you remove ONE LETTER, suddenly the DNC Convention becomes a celebrations of
One Of The Top Brands of Comic Books! THE, "D!," WHO CAN GET
ENOUGH OF NORTH CAROLINA COMICS THEY RUN THE COMIC GAME.
Anyway, hows the entry going so far. Still concerned about this USPS
stuff. On the one hand, it seems like the dumbest political move of all
time, what Trump & Republicans are doing/trying to in regards to Post Office
Sabotage. But on the other hand, IT STILL MIGHT WORK. Also is
tehre any chance they WEREN'T listening to the Beastie Boys-- CHeck Your
Head-- and that's where they got the idea for this? My guess is YES A
VERY, VERY HIGH CHANCE. THAT SONG WAS ON ILL COMMUNICATION? THE ALBUM
THAT CAME AFTER CHECK YOUR HEAD? Yep that seems to check out.
Wikipedia seems to say Sabotage is one of the best
songs ever?? Huh? I mean sure its a FUN GREAT SONG. But BEST SONG?
Rolling Stone has it at #480 of GREATEST FUCKIN' SONGS OF ALL TIME,
and Pitchfork has it at #39 of TOP SONGS OF THE 1990'S?
FINE MAYBE I WAS WRONG. I ALWAYS ENJOYED THE SONG BUT I WAS NEVER LIKE
THIS IS THE BEST SONG EVER I WAS ALWAYS LIKE THIS IS IN THE TOP 3,000
SONGS EVER! AND EVEN THAT, I'D HAVE TO CRUNCH THE NUMBERS VERY, VERY
EXPLICITLY. I don't even think it'd be a Obvious Choice for top dozen
Beastie Boys song, that'll sum up MY perspective. The point is Check Your
Head is the biggest snooze of an album they've got and Ill Communication Is Like
Check Your Head but with Better Songs like Have You Heard The Good News About
Sabotage? Apparently the video for Sabotage was iconic. SO Iconic
that even ME, thinking about it more carefully, even I kinda remember
that video. AND I WAS NOT EVEN AROUND FOR WHEN IT WAS AROUND.
So I guess that settles that?
I forget what the class was called, but I took some English
CreativeWritingish Entry Level Class at NYU freshman year, and part of it was
they showed us two music videos-- The White Striples' The Hardest Button To
Button [directed by Michel Gondry] and I wanna say Wilco/Billy Braggs'
California Stars. Or maybe we just LISTENED to California Stars (lyrics
written by the abominable Woody Guthrie). THESE ARE THE MEMORIES THAT WILL
LAST A LIFE TIME. Well, I have no use for them anymore. Remembered
it for a solid closing in on 14 years, anod now it's on The Internet for
Posterity, so I can go ahead and Forget About It Myself. If I ever need to
remember, well, Here It Is!
Great. Hows it going otherwise. Started the habit
of taking my Phone into Bath with me so I could listen to 3-4 songs During Bath.
My own songs! I've lost the taste for listening to my own songs At Other
Points In Life, but when I'm bathing, I'm like, yeah I'll listen to tracks
3-5 of this one album I gots. I guess. Anyway Lunch is comin' up
in roughly half an hour from this precise moment in time. The moment of me
writing this. Not you reading it and/or any other moment you may
imagine. Unless you happen to somehow be imagining the exact moment
I am writing this (and have been in this Writing Moment for the last 20 seconds)
in wchi case yes you nailed it this is going on as you are considering it.
Hmm. Into 1.75 Beers of 3 Beer today. Then
tomorrow another 3 Beer. Then 2 days without beer. Then beer starts
right back up again! Such is life. Expecting a delivery today.
POSSIBLY. Gotta keep my door open to listen for the bell (Door Bell).
Which mucks up my Feng Shui. I am no longer Goin' It Alone I am now Part
of The Greater Household. Feng Shui is just an Asian way of saying,
"For Sure," right? That seems to check out. Anyway. Maybe
haf 4 beers today. Two tomorrow! I GOT LOTS OF OPTIONS EXCEPT
CLEARLY LIMITED AMOUNT OF LOGICAL OPTIONS. But the point is Great I Dunno.
How disconnected from Regular People do you have to be to think ah The Post
Office no one really counts on that and is gonna care if its intentionally
destroyed from the inside out. Pretty disconnected, that's how I feel!
I'll be back soon! With Lunch!
Sure About That
time for Last ~33% of entry! No more Mediocre Potato Cuts after this.
No more Solidly Good BBQ Salmon. ALready found 3 small bones in 2
mouthfuls of Salmon. Not great. I could DIE! Then where
would I be. Probably underground, in some cemetery or something!
What are MY favorite Beastie Boys songs. I'm not gonna have that
Ramble. Too complicated & boring! And it would go on for too long if
I Was Doing It Justice. Anyway, I've been having recurring dreams
about going back to college/dorming for years (Maye for EVER!) but a new wrinkle
in the last few months is that I sign up for the Dorming for extra months during
the summer and I may or may not succeed, as per each dream, at utalizing that
space and Staying There During Non-School Months.
Yeah! That's worthwhile I guess. Dinner tonight
has gotta be Hammish Corn't Beef. I can't put it off For Ever. What
kinda #SummerToStriveFor should I be looking into for Today. Maybe go back
to some more Tales From The Crypts. You don't mess with success!
Unless you're Trump! Messing with the Post Office! In which case you
still shouldn't be messing with success but apparently you are anyway for
political reasons! Or financial reasons! Or for To Help His
Friend-Donors Reasons! The point is if Trump Fails At Everything does that
mean he will also Fail At His Failings? Is it a double negative to not
succeed at doing something wrong? Something along those lines.
The logic on that doesn't seem to add up. That's What I've Been TRYING
To Tell You! ... I HAVE NO LUNCH LEFT.
Such is life. Ya know what CAUTION TO THE WIND
I'm gonna eat a dinner roll! Anyway, dinner'll either be Corn't Beef
or Roas't Beef Sandwich and a soup. Anyway, last time I had Hearty Beef
Barley Soup, there was a REAL BIG PIECE OF BEEF IN THERE. We're talkin a
real nice chunk o' beef. It made the whole thing positively significantly
better. Anyway, I am not a particularly good Adult Human Being because I
decided very quickly to just grow accustomed to Sleeping With Sharp Metal that's
cutting me up every night. Oh well, you win some, you lose some.
Anyway how long is this Incarnation of Crazysheet Supposed To Last. AT
some point we all need A New Beginning. Oh well like I said Not A Great
Adult Human Being I just sorta coast by day to day do what feels familiar.
Two paragraphs to go! Oh man I jut had this fantasy
I microwave 5 chicken nuggets as a snack. That's like 210, 220 calories.
Five nice good ol' chicken nuggets. Whose gonna argue with that. Hey
how about this one Who Came Up With Chicken Nuggets why This Meat IN Particular
that Hey People Would Like This in Nugget Form. I don't HAVE to
have Crap Sandwich tonight. It's just the RESPONSIBLE thing to do.
Might as well do the Responsible I guess. 3 Beers left. Save 'em
all for tomorrow? Maybe have an extra one tonight and 2 for tomorrow?
Those are the most likely possiblities at this precise moment in time.
Ya know the moment that JUST HAPPENED FOR ME NOT FOR YOU.
What if I was like ok save that beer for tomorrow BUT I
EAT SAY NINE NINE CHICKEN NUGGETS AS A SNACK INSTEAD. Seems
like a win/win/win, right? Beer is spread out, I eat chicken nuggets, I
feel good for usurping Trump as The Master Deal Maker. The point is entry
is just about rapping up. Wrapping up. That's what I meant to say.
Rap it up. Cool! I think people should pay me money to see how
much Chicken Nuggets I can eat in a small period of time. I don't get why
it shouldn't happen. It seems like a win/win/win. I eat
obscene amount of chicken nuggets, I get paid for it, hopefully I am crowned
winner, and you get To Watch Me Eat Too Many Chicken Nuggets. Yep.
I'll see ya tomorrow.
August 15, 2020
Nothing For This Title
Ambivalence is something, I guess! I used to think Ambivalence meant The
Wrong Thing. I thought it meant like nothing. I don't feel strong
one way or the other about This. Turns out, per my research, it means
CONTRADICTORY feelings. Feelings that may or may not cancel each other out, but
genuine DOUBLE feelings nonetheless! I'm Ambivalent about feeling
ambivalent about This Title. There We Go, I Think That Works.
Anway having Lunch Now. An early lunch and a Later Beginning Of Drinking!
Lunch is BBQ Salmon and Below Average Cuts of Potato! What kinda Summers
am I remembering. #SimpsonsSummerToSurvive still going on. Yeah!
Just watched the Jim Carvey episode where he plays a Corrupt Carnie. I
remember being upset with this episode when it first game out. THIS
ISN'T IN CHARACTER FOR EARNEST. EARNST WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A GOOD GUY.
Anyway what's going on in the wide world of sports.
Look if you're gonna be overeating the same amount anyway, might as well just
eat Exactly When You Want. Also if you're gonna be finishing these
mediocre Potato Cuts, might as well get them out of the way as quickly as
possible! Anyway every now and then I remember I have Jalepeno Peppers
in Pickle Jar and I add that to the sandwiches I had been having every now and
then. So it's an Every Now and Then of the Every Now and Then. In
other words NOT SO OFTEN. But also HEY THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT
GREAT IT'S A REAL TREAT THIS WAY. Anyway great news I LEFT MY HOUSE
this morning. We're talkin' my Dad drove me to a Cigar Shop and I got my
mom 2 cartoons of Marlboro 100's. We're talkin only came within 6 feet of
2 people-- customer before me, and cashier-type-guy. Customer left within
seconds of me joining the line (STRAIGHT TO THE TOP!) and the
cashier-type-person was behind GLASS. Except for like a 2x2 feet opening
to exchange MONEY for PRODUCTS. So the point is I'm probably okay.
The good news is The Outside Has Still Got It Goin On'!
I can't wait till Outside is Okay again. Then we're all gonna be like
Hey outside wonderful I forget what was going on lets go home now.
CashierMan was like you look younger than 1988. And I was like
that's right I'm only 31 I think you miscalculated somewhere. But, no, what
REALLY happened was he said you look younger than 1988 and I was like
yeah probably because of the height and he was like hmm and I was
like yep and he was like you getting these for yourself and I was
like no for someone else. HE ENTRAPPED ME YOU CAN'T BUY CIGARETTES
FOR SOMEONE ELSE! We're not talking about VOTING here. Huh.
Anyway that's all behind me now. Unless I contracted Coronavirus from that
25 minute excursion in which case hmm in retrospect Wish I Hadn't Gotten
Anyway. I had A A breakfast but it small in
calories and Bad In Health. We're talkin' a nice clean iced cream cone!
I dunno why! I FELT LIKE WAKING UP AND EATING SOME ICE CREAM.
Whose gonna prove me wrong, you? You wouldn't dare. Dunno what's
going on with air conditioning. I think there's a small chance its fixed
enough and we're good. But most likely we're gonna need to spend thousands
of dollars replacing air conditioning and/or repairing a leak and/or something
else I dunno I don't have all the answers. Had some delicious Meat Loaf
for dinner last night. Will I have delicious Pasta for dinner tonight?
NO! Too lazy. But I'll figure something else out. I have to
eat that Hammish Cornt Beef. I don't like it any more than you do but
these are the cards life has deal't me.
Last paragraph of the section! At some point I plan to
regress to being nine years old so I can finally watch Harry Potter: The
Franchise For The Ages. But until that happens it just gets less and less
likely I will ever watch it. Until I have kids. Then it gets more
and more likely I will watch it until they reach a certain age where, if I I
still hadn't seen it, it goes bach and starts getting less and less likely I
will ever watch it again. Crunched the numbers on that pretty well, I
think. What else is going on. I found that metal thing that
sticks out of my bed. It's not a spring. Just some other Structural
Metal Part. But either way I guess this is the life I have to life
with. I ain't gettin' no new mattress... maybe I could switch mattresses
with Other Bedroom, beds are presumably the same. I'll look into that at a
Keep You Updated On This Situation As It Progresses
as well. The situation is progressing. I forget what the
situation was/is, but it's reasonable to assume that Any Situation That It Could
Have Been IS PROGRESSING. Anyway, beer time. Just had a dinner roll.
I'm a fan of those two things, because like I said a few days ago, both bread,
both about the same thing. Whens the next time I have to leave the house.
Presumably to get blood work done Somewhere in ~2-3 weeks. I don't have
all the, "deats," yet! The good news is looks like Post Office Sabotage is
getting its fair share of attention based on Whatever Dumb Ways I'm Absorbing
The National News. How did BI ABOSRB it.
Preusmably from the National News Somehow. Commondreams.org?
Twitter? Pen Pal? Rap Music? I dunno probably More Or Less All
Of The Above!
Cool. I see Kanye West is a Republican Scam. Oh
well what can ya do. The only question now is Was He ALWAYS A
Republican Scam? I think our instinct is to go oh well he's just
getting progressively more.. Kanye... over time, so now he's willing to make a
deal with the devil! Maybe he was always A Republican Plan'T WE HAVE
NO WAY OF KNOWING AS OF NOW. The good news is I figured out one of the
main ways to contextualize different between FiveThirtyEight Election Projection
(Biden at ~72% to win) and, say, The Economist Election Projection (Biden at
~89% to win). Economist has Trump winning popular vote at 2-3%.
548 has it at 18-20%. So let that guide you on which projection you
feel more comfortable with. Might as well! It's fun to project your
own projections onto official projections.
Cool! What kind of FUN dinner do I have in store for
today. Maybe eat some Ham Corn't Beef with a Soup-- its BAD but I HAEV TO
EAT IT at some point so its FUN to GET IT OUT OF THE WAY. Other optoins?
DOUBLE FROZEN MEAL THE TIME HAS COME FOR THIS IDEA AND I WANT TO ENJOY IT AS
SOON AS POSSIBLE. I think Smart Ones: The Frozen Meal Company should lean
into this, and a fun way to do it is to put each individual meal in plastic
containers that Can Stack On Top Of One Another Like Lego Or Something.
You get a double decker Smart Ones: Frozen Meal. Its convenient so you can
do it in the microwave at once and its FUN because how often are you eating from
ma multi-tiered serving space. In China Food? Pupu platters do that
in my imagination? I'VE NEVER HAD IT IN MY ACTUALIZATION THOUGH SO WHO
Anyway. As Air Conditioning Repairmen All Stars were up
in the attic, which is only accessible through my parents' bed room, my Mom had
me keep her big box of jewelry in my room. FINALLY MY SCHEME IS ABOUT
TO PAY OFF. WAS PRETENDING TO BE A LOVING SON FOR 31.5 YEARS AND NOW THAT
JEWELRY BOX IS MINE, ALL MINE! Also when you open it, the other side
of the Top Of The Box is a mirror. Not sure what that accomplishes. I
don't wanna see myself! Its so you could try on jewelry and stuff, see
what it looks like. Can't you just do that while LOOKING AT THE
WHERE THE JEWELRY IS IN REAL LIFE? No you can't trust Real Life you
gotta see it Through A Mirror. Oh I see carry on then.
Great, just great. Probably done with beer after
tomorrow. 4/7 days! Makes sense to me. Is it legal and/or safe
to mix Frozen Meals fro m Different Companies. Mix a Smart Ones On Top Of
A Lean Cuisines? I assume nothing THAT bad could come of it. I tink
I might go back to #TalesFromTheCryptEternity some more today. It just
can't be beat! It's UPSETTING how much it's the Best Out Of Anything You
Could Ever Possibly Imagine. I think I'm gonna watch that one with the
two men who killed their wives seperately but its a game of cat and mouse and
did one o them really kill their wives? Yes but you only find out at the end so
pretend I didn't spoil it. The good news is There Are No
Distinguishing Features in that sentence so I can't imagine how your brain could
process it in any way that would make any, "Deat," memorable.
Cool! The reason I'm thinking of it is because they're
on a train and at some point a guy s having a steak dinner (or pot roast?
Some kind of High Quality Beef Dinner) and then another one takes a bite out of
it and I WANNA TAKE A BITE OUT OF THAT. I want THE WHOLE THING but you
know what? I'd SETTLE FOR A BITE. Also Eating Meals On Trains?
NOW YOU'RE TALKIN' MY LANGUAGE. Also I'm not foolin', I think tonight
REALLY MAY BE THE NIGHT for a Double Frozen Dinner. That's Almost
AS Good As Eating Fictional Pot Roast On A Fictional Train! Tales From
The Crypt -- Two For The Show -- Available On Your Favorite YouTube
(assuming your favorite is the real and accurate YouTube Everyone Is All Aware
Titles Are Back!: Coming August 2023
Something like that. Bad news-- Double Trouble TV Dinner is NOT in the
cards for tonight-- I only have ONE! So most lkely Dinner is Soup +
Sandwich OR Double Trouble Burrito Dinner. Anyway looks like I'm most
likely gonna be able to pace myself so that I have Beer on Monday, too!
Talk about a Respubslibe Adoolt. Hey how about this-- cup o noodles and
a Frozen Dinner. I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT! IT SHUOLD BE IN A
POEM. Anyway. One of my favorite things to do is irresponsibly
rub at my eyes with contacts on, so the contact gets lost in one of the eyes,
but I know its still there, but I have to spend 40 minutes holding my eye open
at diferent positions, trying to get under the eye, under the eye lid, all over,
and FINALLY GETTINT IT OUT, and I'm like HEY I DID IT I DESERVE SOME SORT OF
Ya know that sort of thing. It's good for a man to
have hobbies. Finished the Fried Chicken. Basically had 1/2 of it
for lunch 2 days ago and the other 1/2 Here and There All Over The Place All The
Time and Finally Finished it just now. Sometimes I wish I could go back in
time and UN-Master My The Uppers Music. For some reason I made every song
really tinny and trebly. I'm sure I had my reasons, but if I could go
back, just leave it alone, what the Hell is your problem. On the
other hand, I don't care enough either way unfortunately. That's
the main problem. Not giving any figs. I keep scratching (bordering
on cutting) myself on this piece of metal in my mattress. OVER. AND
OVER. AND OVER. AGAIN! I guess this is just life now.
Well, great, what else is going on. What kinda #HorrorSummerToSpookOutTo
can I watch. Just picture it. I'm on a train eating some Pot
Roast. Maybe Beef Shank SteakPods. Red Meat Reservoir.
Anyway the point is my friend is like Hmm that looks good can I take a bite
of it? And then SUDDENLY I AM MY FRIEND NOT ME ANYMORE.
Now I'm enjoying it form THEIR perspective and that's the best way to
enjoy Cow Carcass In The First Place. Anyway right now looks like top
chice for dinner is Double Burrito#DoubleBurritoSummerToSupWith. But if
Air Conditioning stops working within the next 3 hours, gotta go with a Non-Oven
Wonderful. What do I got in store for these last two
paragraph. Drink ~1/2 or so of 3rd of 3 Beers For The Day Presumably. But
that's not WITHIN paragraph. It's DURING paragraph FOR ME SPECIFICALLY.
Hmm that reminds me I can watch some Stephen King Horrorshow Show as a @ScarySummerToSitOut.
You're sitting out because it's too scary to be actively participating.
No good King Horror Movies. HBOMAX recommended Hello Ladies but
that's too spooky! What other Horrorshow are out there. I can
re-watch Return Of The Living Dead 1: Is It Even Really Returning At This
Point? which I haven't seen in a solid 6 weeks or so. IT'S ONE OF MY TOP
10 FAVORITE MOVIES GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT IS THE POINT.
Last paragraph! Maybe I will just aim to end drinking
after tomorrow, I dunno! Whatever's easier! That's how you know
something is worth doing and is the right thing to do! It's easy!
That's just obvious logic! Also the first ingredient in this Ham/Corn't
Beef is Beef which is a good sign but I dunno TASTES A LOT LIKE HAM TO
ME. LOOKS A LOT LIKE HAM TO ME. Maybe there was a mix up At The
Deli Department, I dunno, there's gotta be SOME explanation for this!
JIM VARNEY? PLAYING A CARNEY? WHAT KINDA OLDMCDONALDRHYME IS
THIS?!?!?!? Is there a reason why there isn't a Streaming Service
dedicated to the ~8, 10, or 12 Ernest Movies? Because if there isn't Then
It Should Logically Exist.
That's just Math! Looking into
Voting By Mail. By which I mean asking My Dad about it, who is doing
it, ad he'll explain it to me. Then googling it myself because I am
a Risponsable Adalt but it not making sense just spending 3 seconds staring at
it out of focus, so then going back to, 'my dad'll figure this one out for me.'
Ain't That Always The Way. I'll see you guys tomorrow. Yep seems
to check out.
August 14, 2020
Conditioning Repairment All Stars are here yet again today! And it's worse
news than ever! I may get some air conditioning as soon as this evening or
I May Not I DON'T HAVE NEARLY EVEN REMOTELY ALL THE ANSWERS. Partly m
fault, though. I haven't really engaged on this issue. If I
involved myself more in this Crisis I'd be more aware of what's going on is the
point. So in other words It's My Fault but What Can I Do About It!
Anyway what's going on in the wide world of sports. 2 and a half months
till Election Day, right? Lemme Crunch The Numbers Exactly... LOOKS
LIKE 10 & 1/2 WEEKS. You know what that means! Roughly 75 days!
I figure We Can Lock This Shit Up for only a Solidly Less Than 8 Weeks Left.
The point is I Think We REALLY need to start voting Now at this point? To
be fair, we probably have 3-4 weeks. Once we're sending out votes in
October, good chance they'll just throw those out. If they feel like it.
I know in the film Idiocracy everyone there is stupid as
fuck but at least they have a HIGHER FUNCTIONING DEMOCRACY THAN WE CURRENTLY
HAVE. So People= Dumb, Institutions=dumb, but at least the institutions
haven't failed us. They just act as dumb as the people within them!
But they're some something ya can count on! I dunno. The USPS
Sabotage is about as Sexy An Issue as you could ever imagine a Post Office Issue
Being. SABOTAGE, UNDERMINING DEMOCRACY, ILLEGAL PRIVATIZATION...
If you told me a few months ago The POSTAL SERVICE is gonna be the Talk Of The
Debate Town, I'd be like, YEAH OK I GUESS NOW THAT YOU EXPLAIN IT TO ME I AM
CURRENTLY PREPARED TO BE ON BOARD WITH SEXY SEXY USPS SCANDAL OF THE CENTURY.
The point is I get mail all the time! ALL THE TIME! Personally, I
get at least a dozen SIGNIFICANT pieces of mail from USPS a week. Just ME.
Just SIGNIFICANT. I do find it amusing that Trump & CO are way more adept
and successful and qualified at Sabotage and Scams than just Doing A Regular
Business/Government Thing. Cause that's what they did to America.
All Scams & Sabotage. If only Trump was a regular successful guy at
legal and legitimate enterprises, we wouldn't be in this mess!
Oh well such is life. Finished #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor.
Finished #ObeseSistersSummerToSitOn. What's next. Probably
something, that's my best guess. I had a real-life Sleeping-Dream
where Biden won and I was like wait a second I can just sorta tune out and
enjoy life? Hmm, that doesn't seem to check out. I don't have a
life. But I guess I can just enjoy tuning out and... I dunno, just enjoy
the, "Tune Out!" I'll figure something out over time in regards to What Life Is
To Be Like. Also on the one hand being civically engaged in a
Mediocre/Adequately Run society is still very important but on the other hand
YEAH HAVE YOU HEARD THE GOOD NEWS ABOUT, "TUNING OUT," THOUGH? BECAUSE I
DON'T THINK YOU HAVE IF YOU'RE COMING AT ME WITH THAT BULLSHIT. As long as
Climate Change is the bigges issue of history and existing in one of its most
important eras, we have no good reason to Tune Out. EVEN WITHOUT TRUMP, WE
GOTTA FIX THE WORLD, ONE NEWS CYCLE AT A TIME. Such is life.
Right? Yeah! Great. Fried Chicken
wasn't that great. But on ther other hand it was OKAY. Wasn't I
supposed to start smoking Marijuana Recreationally now that Kamala Harris is
Future Vice President. I guess they never got the message.
I'd Just accept a Marijuana Sponser or something, that's all I need. You
pay me in the Good Marijuana Ya Got. I can only imagine what Good
Marijuana is like these days. I was happy with the Good Marijuana of the
mid-late 2000's. Best good marijuana I could imagine! I wanna say
probably SOUR DIESEL. Now a days who even can imagine not me well I
can but when I imagine it its worse and makes me uncomfortable when I try to
imagine even better marijuana I can't even comprehend. It's nothing new,
but I gotta double down on the thought that I love Trump's campaign promise of
I Will Stop You From Voting. STRONG leadership. Very Strong.
Anyway. The good news is, with Air Conditioning
Repairmenpeople in the attic, I'm almost certain that there has been No Hobo(s)
Living In My Attic lately. Unless 1)They left just within the last few
days 2)they worked out a deal with Air Conditioning People to Keep It Hush Hush
or 3) They ARE the Air Conditioning People [it's the perfect scam]. Was
thinking about getting back into reading. Not LITERALLY. I was
thinking about how I shuold be thinking about getting back into reading. I
was thinking about thinking about getting back into reading and how it should be
something I really think about. But oh well I am Just One Man what can
I do? Read the rest of the George Carlin Semi-Autobiography?!?
NO wa... wait a second I could do that. I think. I think I
of my favorite things about the USPS in pop culture (other than the band Postal
Service) is there's an episode of Doug: The Cartoon where Doug is trying to
covertly open up a piece of mail without it being shown that it was open
(something to do with school or something? A bad report card? I
forget). And anyway somehow he gets a finger cut trying one thing, and he
bleeds on the envelope. And then later on when his Dad gets home and is
going through the mail, he comes across the piece of mail with blood on it and
goes THANKS A LOT, POSTAL SERVICE! He's upset that the postal
service bled on his mail! Like it's happened before! That's kinda
funny, right. I think the Air Conditioning People are listening to
Paul McCartney's Maybe I'm Amazed in my attic. I hear it
somewhere. And I don't usually hear music anywhere except for from
me. So the point is SPOT ON JOB GUYS PERFECT SONG FOR A NICE WARM
QUARANTINE FRIDAY AFTERNOON.
So, great, what else is going on and crap. My
Grandfather on my Dad's side was a Paper Delivery Man but not USPS. News
Paper. Newspaper and maybe some periodicals and stuff like that kinda
delivery man. SO I HAVE A PERSONAL CONNECT TO USPS FOLKS. Almost!
I have a personal connection to my Paternal Grandfather Almost. I met his
son SEVERAL times. Seems like good people. Can return to #LeprechaunSummerToSettleFor
but the next one is Leprechaun In Space?? I don't get why a Leprechaun
would BE in space or HAVE THEIR POWERS in space and also how did this gold get
into space in the first place? Hopefullying that Air Conditioning is
working by tonight not just for Cool Comfort but also because then I can use
Family Oven and make Family Communal Meat Loaf. I'd ike some meat loaf right
about 4 hours from now!
Anyway, gonna finish It Was Dijorno: Now It's Soon To Be
Excrament for lunch in about half an hour. MICROWAVED SURE but its still
better than eating it frozen! I'm not happy about this Hamwise Corn't
Beef. Part of me is like it can't be THAT MUCH like ham, my senses
must have been deceiving me. Couldn't be! But I'm SCARED to try
it again and having my worst fears confirmed. Anyway, I dunno, what lese
is going on. If it IS ham, can always add it to Frozen Pizza and make a
MeetLovers. Everythings coming up roses. Anyway In Today's
Modern Era, I think it would be a nice POLITE thing to do to ENCOURAGE USPS that
every time we successfully get something in the USPS we sent the USPS A THANK
YOU LETTER. Unless it's too late or not get it at all-- then we send a
NEEDS IMPROVEMENT Letter. Either way I get the sense they need more
Wonderful. The point is for that 9-15 months I had a
job one of my most consistant tasks was Putting Mail Into Slots. Lol
I'd like to put some Male INto Sluts. But, no. I get dozens Of
Mail for the building, and then I sort them into dividing them into Each
Individual Peson Gets A Cubby. And I give them their mail. And I
NEVER HAD A PROBLEM. And I never even got a Thank You Letter ONCE.
Unless you count the time I got FIRED. Which was presumably because I was
TALKING TOO MUCH to the other student worker and POSSIBLY making her
uncomfortable because AT THAT POINT my mental illness was beginning to BLOSSOM
so who knows what kinda crap I was saying that I Thought Was Polite
Conversation. Oh, right. THANK YOU USPS!
Anyway. Why No Popular TV or Movie about Postal Service
People? Seems like a major oversight! To the extent that It Must
Have Been Tried A Dozen Times But Never Fully Caught On. Such is life.
MMaybe that's one way to Save The Already Solvent Post Office At Least
Before It Was Sabotaged. COMMISSION A COUNTRYWIDE DOCUMENTARY OF USPS.
Think, "The Office," But Real, And In 3,000 LOCATIONS SIMULTANEOUSLY. It's
a win-win! We get entertainment, They get entertainment, money is involved
somehow, and The Mail Happens Yet Again which is what a solid 60% of us would
prefer would happen. That's the real question, though, right?
How partison are we that, based on Trumps straightforward I'm Trying To
Sabotage The Election! comments, how people people are now AGAINST the USPS
working to its highest capacity. 30% at least, right? And
that's a lot. But I'd guess it's probably closer to 40%.
POSSIBLY MORE. TRUMP WANTS TO SABOTAGE MAIL? I TRUST HIS
JUDGEMNT. THEY'RE PROABLY IN ON THE CHILD SEX RING I GUESS, NOW ALL THE
PIECES ARE STARTING TO COME TOGETHER. THEY HAVE A HUGE INFRASTRUCTURE TO
DELIVER THINGS FROM HERE TO THERE AND NOW REMEMBERING ALL THE CHILD SEX SLAVERY
I FINALLY GET WHAT ITS FOR! The pieces are finally coming
into play! ...That America is.. fucking... dumb. How do we undumb all
this dumb. It's gonna be tough!
I have an idea! How about 2/3rds of us continue to
live in America and 1/3rd of us Go Sucks Trump's Dick. Seems like a
win/win solution all around! What else is going on and crap. If you
think about it in a novel way, QANAN stuff is the ONLY WAY to make America seem
even dumber than Trump. Without the QANAN factor, Trump is clearly
stupider even than the stupidest dumb conservatives who support him. But
now with QONAN, Trump looks Damn Near Almost Sane! Whatta scam. I added
Kamala Harris to my Twitter Followers for a solid half a day. I have 13
followers befoer and after. And I do it Strategically so that it's not 13
followers from the same sphere, but I make picks that each follower leads to a
Web of other people I'd like to read, for convenience. Anyway realized
Kamala Harris added nothing to my Twitter Web. But the point is what else
is going on. Time for a break.
Right, This Is Hell
Great, time for pizza. Great, gotta decide my next @SummerToRememberThingToDo.
Front Runner is Hary Potter, but I dunno, I'm AN ADULT, and this is an
ADULT AUGUST. Going to watch Kamala Harris Potters would be a step in the
WRONG direction. And I'm not, "On Board," with making ANY steps in the
wrong direction, it just means I'll have to make That Many More Steps In The
Right Direction To Get To Where I Want To Go! But the point is I guess
I'll be done with this entry in roughly 30 minutes. Give or take some minutes.
No more Dignornio for the next week. I got a Frozen Pizza French Bread
Pizza which takes up less room. Is Digiorno part of Qanan? Frozen
Pizza Gate, right? What's the Standard Boilerplate on how to treat
someone who believes in QANON as a therapist. I don't give America credit
enough that physictrists would be like well I wonder why you believe in
insane conspiracy theories. I give America credit enough that
pshycitrists would be like look it may be true it may not be true YOU'VE GOT
TO LIVE YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT EITHER WAY!
The good news is I enjoyed that #FrozenPizzaGate. I
don't care who knows it, that's just how things go! Late lunch, too, so if
we have communal dinner, that'll be in no more than 3 hours. Fascinating.
There's gotta be good news going on, right? I think it's kind of
good news that USPS/Election Sabotage has been gettin' some airplay.
But there's no GOOD good news. There's Good news in terms of Bad News
Getting Some Play. But where's the generic Good Good News Getting Enough
Play That I'm Aware Of The Good News. We blew the wad on Kamala Harris,
and I ENJOYED that news, but if it weren't for the pile on of good news, i'd
probably be rather indifferent!
The worst part of Kamala Harris news was me going well I
guess I'm pretty dumb for not seeing this coming. I mean, If I had to
guess, I'd have picked her as a PLURALITY, MOST LIKELY, but afterwards I
realized, oh, yeah, this is a pretty obvious pick, shuolda seen it coming as a
>50% OVERALL PICK. But its GOOD NEWS because SHE'S a GOOD GUY and
let's get her into an Elected Office STAT. Am I supposed to be, "Jazzed,"
about finally having a Female VP/P HEad Of State? Cause I AM! But
I'm also like well at this point its nothing groundbreaking. Other
Democracies across the world have already done this stuff time nad time again.
Yeah but WE DIDN'T. I WONDER WHAT AN AMERICAN FEMALE VP WOULD BE
LIKE... (mind goes to replaying episodes of VEEP).
Fascinating. Also if you wanna do a 23&ME but can't
afford it, just run for vice president, and the right wing, "Press,"'ll do it
for you! IT'S CALLED BEING EFFICICENT . Who was the 23rd president.
Harding? LMLTURQ. BENJAMIN HARRIS? THAT DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT.
IS HE RELATED TO KAMALA HARRIS? WAIT WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN HIS NAME
WAS BENJAMIN HARRISON. NONE OF THiS Is ADDING UP IT ALl SOUNDS LIKE A
SCALM. Do Stuipd People Feel Smart By Supporting The Stupidity of Donald
Trump. Do they think that if Trump is the perpetrator suddenly That Means
It's Smart so Doing/Supporting whatever Stupid This He's Doing Is Suddenly Smart
Even If They Otherwise Would Have Recognized It's Stupid? AMERICA.
Last paragraph of the entry! I can, "Dig,"
that. Meatloaf is delicious but I don't like how I only get 2 relatively
small slices. I get some of that Potato I wasn't 100% on board with.
But The Good News is The Timing Is Delicious-- we're talking only 2.5 hours from
now or so!
Wonderful. 4 drinks yesterday. 4 or 5 today.
Overall'll finish 18 off in 4 days most likely. That's fun. Air
Conditioning People are still hanging out but I think they're just eating lunch
and playing Wings albums. Anyway there's some metal sharpness
sticking out of my mattress so that's where my mysterious cuts have been coming
from. I don't have any good solutions, though. If I tell my parents
I need a new mattress then suddenly they're aware of my shortcomings. If I
don't then suddenly I'm giving myself tetanus 2, 3 times a week. I guess I
just have to sleep on the floor from now on. Only optoin that makes any
Anyway, I'll see you guys later!
August 13, 2020
Week'll Be Different
Different from/than something, at least. I've narrowed it down to That
Happening. The point is I got supermarket Delivery coming up within the
next few hours but I figured I'd get started on this in the mean time. I
saw Trump was like hey we're defunding the postal service in order for them
to not have the resources to be able to count absentee ballots. It's
like that scene in James Bond movies where the villains reveal his plan, but
instead of what usually happens, like James Bond Foiling their evil scheme,
James Bond just kinda shrugs and is like well THAT SUSCKS AND ON THE REAL
KINDA KNEW IT ALL ALONG. and then they're like so what else is going on
and then the credits roll.
Except we're ALL James Bond. So now its time to either
collectively shrug and be like I KNEW IT... what else is going on, or, be
like, HMM... I KNOW IT AND I KNEW IT. MMM. I'M GETTING
ANGRY... I'M GOING TO TURN INTO TTHE HULK HE'LL KNOW WHAT TO DO IN
THIS SITUATION. Or just support legislation designed in preserve the
post office's resources and political neutrality and its ability to send
out and process mail in votes. YEAH LETS DO THAT ONE I LIKE THE SOUND
OF THAT! We'd need A LOT OF HULKS to make enough political civilian
power to get that through, though. Everyone knows A In-Action-Hulk is ~20
people. We need like A HUNDRED THOUSAND PRO VOTE-BY-MAIL HULKS and we need
to organize These Hulks AS SOON AS POSSIBLE there's no time to waste!
Yeah! PRO-- beer soon. CON-- beer not yet.
PRO-- done with putting away groceries for the week soon. CON-- gotta put
away (AND WIPE ON/OFF) groceries imminently. PRO-- Mail Post Office PEOPLE
WON'T PUT UP WITH IT. CON-- Maybe Enough People Will Put Up With It that
it's destroyed. PRO- some paragraph without beer. CON-- I WANT BEER
RIGHT NOW OR IF NOT BEER AT LEAST SOMETHING ELSE THAT MAKES ME CHEMICALLY FEEL
BETTER. I'm so upset this morning I've gone back to watching Tales Of Some
Crypts. I like seeing Nudities Across Time because people have different
body shapes particularly breasts. You see some 1990's breasts in Tales
From The Crypts, different episodes VERY DIFFERENT INTRA-1990'S BREASTS... and
I'm all like hey those are interesting! Nice change of pace! I
wonder how that's working out for her.
Sometimes I try to calculate How Much Porn There Is/How
Many Current Porn-Aged-Females in America Are In Porn Somewhere. Gotta
figure there's ~100 million Porn Appropriate Aged Females in America.
First base-line guess is about a million of them are in porn SOMEWHERE.
Which accounts for how Yes, There's Way, Way Too Much Porn, but also, Still
only 1% of females showin' up in 'em. LMLTURQ there's gotta be some
scientific analysis on How Many Porn People Are There In An Just Society.
Hmm. Lots of academic discussion on how many people watch porn.
I wanna know how many people are in porn. IS THAT SO WRONG.
Well, what else is going on and crap. Got some people
up in the attic hopefully Fixing Air Conditioning. They've been here 4
times over the last few weeks but THIS TIME AROUND IT'S GONNA TAKE I CAN JUST
FEEEL IT IN THE AIR... HEY THAT'S A GOOD SIGN ALREADY! Anyway, way
to go for Big Brain Trump going on TV telling us what he's been up to.
Trump: I Am Currently Attempting To Sabotage The Election By De-funding
The United States Postal Service So They Will Hopefully Be Unable To Count Mail
In Ballots During A Pandemic. Well Done! You put it more
succinctly than I ever could! NOW I'D LIKE TO SEE THE COMICALLY
WAY TOO OBVIOUS UNIVERSAL BIPARTISAN SENSICAL OBVIOUS ONLYWAYTODOITINADEMOCRACY
some Prose And Cons since last section. PRO-- beer and food is here.
CON-- air conditioning installation is fucked up, because it would be visible
from outside ors ometing, and Neigborhood Complex don't fuck with that, and now
lots of more time and money is being wasted. PRO-- lunch and beer.
CON-- MY PARENTS ARE UPSET I CAN'T STAND TO SEE THEM LIKE THIS. PRO- Fancy
Roast Beef Sandwich CON- Not so great Potato Side. Tried a different
potato side and I. WAS. WRONG. Anyway what else is going on. Maybe
if I get slightly drunk I'll forget about how my Dad feels like Less Of A Man
because He got The Air Conditioning Plans And Implemtation wrong both
Practically and Financially. I can only imagine thats how it makes him
feel. Could be just me projecting. Well, if I was
my father, and this Air Conditioning Stuff was going on, I'd feel like I let
down my Son.
Anyway, what else is going on. My parents are
struggling with air conditioning and I'm eating the FANCY FEAST roast beef?
I wonder who will be consider more quintessentially American 50 years from
now-- Trump or Post Office. I dunno about you but I'm on TEAM POST OFFICE
RIDE OR DIE. So much so that I'll write several half paragraphs about it!!
Could I have filled out Sandwich with an extra 2 slices of Fancy Feast Roast
Beef? Yeah! It'd have been better! BUT I CAN'T GO BACK IN TIME
NOT in ANY SCHEME I CAN CONJURE UP. I better do some moe research into
pornography when this section of the entry is over. Makes me feel like
a big man. In real life My Dad Is Less Of A Man Because Air Conditioning
and I'm Exponentially LESS of a Less Of A MAn Because I'm JUst My Dad's
Adult-age Male Child Who Isn't Engaging with this AT ALL... but hey PORNOGRAPHY
IS OUT THERE TO BE CONTEMPLATED.
Right? Sure. IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHIN' to fuck up
my drinking. Last week it was DON'T DRINK SO MUCH. This week
its AIR CONDITIONING IS FUCKED UP. What'e next week SOME SORT OF
APOCOLYPSE PERHAPS ZOMBIE RELATED? Anything to mess up my Eternal Beer
Buzz. How am I supposed to enjoy writing an entry when I know SOMEHOW,
SOMEWHERE, SOMEONE CLOSE TO ME IS UPSET ABOUT AIR CONDITIONING INSTALLATION.
Anyway I was Googling How Long Should It Take To Drink One Beer. Got some
good input. 20-30 minutes seemed to be the favorite but I think you could
make a case for chugging the entire thing in 20 seconds. That'll wash
away All Those Air Conditioning Worries Right Away. You'll be thinking
air con... wha... Thank God I Have People Who Take Care Of All This Kinda Stuff
For Me... wait, no I don't... man this Life Is The Pits. At Least My Son
is enjoying his beer. JOKES ON HIM I CAN'T ENJOY IT AS MUCH EITHER!
That'll learn 'em.
Wonderful. I did make it a solid Almost-72 Hours
without beer, though. That was fun! It was all the fun of habitually
drinking beer without the stress of having to eternally be saving beer slightly.
I shuold have done better with SuperMarket Delivery Specificiations.
Puttin' stuff away, I definitely get the sense, I shoulda gotten some more
stuff, I dunno. Oh hey I Got Some Fresh Direct: Fried Chicken that
shuold be fun. It's like chicken fingers but, well, nope, notlike chicken
fingers, ore like fried chicken! Presumably some drum sticks, those'd be
the tops. Maybe a fried chicken breast I'd likke to get my hands on that.
A Fried Chicken Thigh. I can tolerate some Thigh.
Yeah! I can't wait until 3 months from now when the
memory of his latest Air Conditioning Failure has been swept clean from my Dad's
mind and we're all just LAUGHS and a barrel of GOOD TIMES and all so HAPPY HAPPY
HAPPY. Yep that seems to check out. I was gonna have fried
chicken for lunch but then I forgot had had the Fancy Feast Roast Beef.
Now I plan to have it for dinner. It's good to have things to look
forward to is the point. Hey, what paragraph of Part II is this?
4? Wonderful. FIVE? EVEN BETTERFUL. The
point is election is in less than 3 months. If Biden just HOLDS where he
is at in polls, relatively-quickly will his Projection-Of-Winning-Rate be
improving! Makes sense to me. That's why when I saw John Kerry up
above George W Bush, 53%-46, in late September, with 2% margin of error, WELL
ITS A SURE THING AT THIS POINT. EVEN IF THE WHOLE TWO PERCENT IS WRONG
HE'S AT 51% THAT'S MORE THAN ENOUGH TO WIN. BREAK OUT THE JOHN KERY
2004 WORLD CHAMPION SHIRTS! Wasn't that the year the Red Sox had their
big slump breaking championship? And John Kerry was from Boston?
Hmmm seems like A SCAMSA BREWIN...
Guarantee Void Everywhere
and Dad were on the phone about this Nonsense and I was like so what's going
on and my Mom was like we may have to break the wall, your bedroom wall
and the DenWall below it. And I was like hmm good thing this isn't
theater it's not safe to break the fourth wall. And then my Mom looked
at me and was like wonder what it would have been like to have a normal son.
The point is I had a slice of Corn'd Beef and WTF THIS CORN'D BEEF IS HAM.
CORN'T HAM MAYBE. IT'S VAGUELy SIMILIAR TO CORN'T BEEF BUT MUCH MORE
SIMILAR TO JUST HAM WHATTA SCAM. On the other hand, with the Fried
Chicken Platter, they had 1 Drumstick that was just the same size as a Buffalo
Wing Drumstick, so I had it, and it was great! There's PROS and CONS in
every jail cell is the point.
I dunno. I may have to go get cigarettes for my Mom
today or tomorrow. And, at the very least, in return I could expect her to
react to my FOurth Wall pun in the best possible way for me. Hmm
what's the best possible way.b Her Smiling and being like oh you're
the number one son. You saved this family from Air Conditioner Heartache
and your winning attitude is a service to this family, Inside & Out. Also
try that Ham Corn't Beef Again-- I added a slice of ham to the top to PRACTICAL
JOKE you, you'll be pleasantly surprised that the rest of it is delicious,
delicious Corn't Beef!
That's how Families Work in my head. In my Ideal
head. Something along those lines. I saw they're starting to Birther
Kamala Harris. Man oh man why have I been CURSED with this intellect
that I can predict things HALF AN HOUR AHEAD OF TIME!!! IT'S NO BLESSING
IT'S HELL. I KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN IN 30 Minutes... ALL THE TIME!
If I really think about it. Not under any regular circumstances.
Right now, it's 1:59-- I have no idea what's coming up at 2:30, because I put no
THOUGHT or CONSIDERATION into it. I need to ACTIVELY TRY and then I'll put
the pieces together! Here's a prediction for 5 hours-- FRIED
CHICKEN THIS MOTHER UP. Put it in oven, or eat it cold. First
instinct was cold. SeSecond instinct was oven.
Third and fourth instincts were still oven. Then fifth instinct was
cold. I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.
I'm embarrassed to realize that Common Law Harrasment
being a pun for Kamala Harris Meant is SOMEHOW A BIT CLUNKIER THAN I HAD
HOPED? I don't see HOW it turned out as such but I'm man enough to admit
when things don't go my way. Hey only 1.5 paragraphs to go.
Sounds like fun. I like how there's lots of pictures of Kamala Harris
smiling. I LIKE SEEIN' SOME SMILES. I don't care that when she first
applied to become a Famous Politician their one tip was DO LOTS OF INTENSE
SMILING, it works! BECAUSE YA KNOW WHAT IT WORKS. Smiling
is contagious! I remember when I was a preteen, I was seeing a
psychiatrist for reasons we'll get into later and/or in the past, but since I
refused to engage with psychiatrist one-on-one, and he still wanted out money,
he turned it into Family Sessions. And one of the first sessions, very
possibly the first, we just talked about how if you see someone yawning
you're gonna start yawning too. I think that's Just What We Thought
Physiatrists Meant in 2000. You guys know about this Communal Yawning
Stuff Phenomenon, right, that's your deal?
Last paragraph! I dunno. Whatta do with the
rest of the day. Research some pornography. Maybe watch some Tales
From Some Crypts. Get cracking on an Indie Theater Play about breaking
down 4th walls. Hey I didn't throw out these chicken bones yet. You
know what that means. I can try to rip out whatever miniscule amount of
chicken is still hangin' on them bones! The fun never stops at the K*Rnbesl***
Residence. I Still Like KRNBLM, my last name in Jewish formation (when
there's no vowels)... because it means KAREN, BLACK LIVES MATTER.
I'll never get tired of that. I'll FORGET it. But I won't REMEMBER
IT and then conciously be like YEAH I'M TIRED OF THAT. The point is
Kamala Harris KINDA Looks like A Karen but also OBVIOUSLY BLM to her. She
doesn't necessarily look like a BLM Karen as much as she does look like a Karen
IN GENERAL before Karens became Karen. Also closest White Name to her
name. Gotta imagine in 2nd grade the teacher was doing attendance and was
like Ka...mala... Harris? I'm just gonna call you Karen.
Last paragraph. Is there supposed to be TV
entertainment this fall. Specifically, Saturday Of The Night Lives?
LMLTURQ. ACORDING TO JULY 20TH, THEY'RE LOOKING INTO IT. I think we
can agree that, whether it was the most important thing or not, at SOME point we
all sort of registered, hmm looks like Maya Rudolph gonna be showing up on
SNL more. It's a GOOD thing does that make it warranted COMPLETELY and
also is it even a GOOD thing? I don't have all the answers but my
guess is ITS A SCAM THEY WANTED KAMALA HARASSMENT ALL ALONG AND MADE MAYA
RUDOLPH FUNNY AND LIKABLE WHAT A SCAM. She's married to that Super
Director, right? You know the guy. He's like one of the
half dozen Super Great Directors That People Like. Paul Thomas Anderson.
Well, hey, I guess that's about it for today. I'll see ya
tomorrow. Oh PTA NOW I GET IT. I ALWAYS CALLED HIM, "PTA," IN MY
IMAGINATION. SEE YA LATER.
August 12, 2020
Right Entrying Takes WORK not just Time
wouldn't be saying that Twere I To Be Drinking! Anyway big news It's
Confirmed THERE WILL BE a VP to the Democratic Ticket. And I think we're
supposed to be buying into the narrative the VP is gonna mean something this
time around. Mike Pence was/is a Big Zero. Biden WAS not that flashy
a VP but there's two schools of thought about how he might see HIS VP. He
might relate to VP so he'll give 'em a lot to do. Or he might think of it
like hazing and he's like WELL I WENT THROUGH THIS FOR 8 YEARS LET 'EM SUFFER
JUST LIKE I DID. That's kind of like what hazing is! Not really!
Not SO far off though! Just significantly far off! From definitions!
What was I talking about again!
If I learn't anything from my #MarvelSummerToRemember its
that Good Guys Do Better By Being in AN ENSEMBLE of Good Guys. So the more
Good Guy(/Gal) Protagonists we got The Better Suited We Are Against THANOS.
Anyway whose gonna be the next Super Villain after Trump. How can you
escalate Super Villainy from Donald Trump. Well I see how you CAN but I don't
see how you can WITHOUT IT BEING TERRIBLE OH SO TERRIBLE.
Anyway what else is going on. Had lunch which was breakfast but I ate it
late. We're talkin' Microwaved Frozen Breakfast Sandwich: Jimmy Dean
Variety Which is Most Indulgent: But It's The Healthy Option For Jimmy Dean: But
Healthy Jimmy Dean Breakfast Sandwich Is More Indulgent Than Indulgent Option
For Healthy Brand Breakfast Sandwich. Well that settles that one,
Hey what's going on again? I just spaced out for 10
minutes Trying To Think of Stuff For Supermarket Delivery. I came up with
A Couple Things but There's Still More To Be Come Up't With! Anyway.
I was trying to figure out what Kamala Harris' pick means and/or how it'll
impact/insinuate in terms of political-position-lanes and whatnot for the
ticket, and I dunno. Maybe It Just Is. You got two politicians who
are not afraid of pleasing the donor class, rich people and corporations, but
you also have two people who are also not afraid of pleasing Regular Folk!
Maybe They Are Just Mostly Well Meaning Politicians trying to get it right day
in, day out. Oh was Kamala Harris A CONSERVATIVE AG or would she
inhabit that role from the inside out to become More PROGRESSIVE. I
dunno, maybe she's just some lady Who IS What That Is And Whatnot. Not
sure what I've accomplished this paragraph. It Is What It Is.
And We'll Find Out What It Will Be! ... Together! That's about it, I
Anyway YEAH I'm buying a POUND of Corn'd Beef for next week
of Groceries! It's HEALTHY because Corn is healthy for you-- vegetable!
But it's got the protein aspect too because of the word, "Beef!" I
wonder if Kamala Harris has any, "Beefs," with anyone. Probably.
I wonder if Joe Biden has ever had, "Corn't On The Cob."
Seems within his carefully crafted, "Persona," that he's eaten corn on the cob.
Anyway, I dunno. D owe call Kamala Harris, "Kamala?" That seems
disrespectful. But it's an Interesting Name and is the most distinctive
name She's Got! Then again yep Harris, that seems to check out.
Anyway, hey, one more paragraph after this one and I get to take Break #1!
Anyway, 538 released their Election Projection and they got Biden at 71% odds of
winning Election. I WANT IT TO BE HIGHER IS THERE ANYWAY WE CAN GO INTO
THE, "THE MATRIX," MAINFRAME AND ADJUST SOME OF THESE NUMBERS TO MAKE IT ALMOST
DEFINITE BIDEN TURNS OUT THE WINNER?
Seems like the only way Democracy Could Work! Going
into The The Matrix Mainframe and changing Some Zeroes into Some Ones.
Hey how about that Butterfly Theory. We each gotta be careful that
every time we flap our wings we're not putting into motion a history for Trump
is president for another 4 years. It's on ALL OF US, c'mon, K'mon
La.... Common Law, Common Law Harassment. Well that settles
that. The point is Joe has been Biden his time for a long, long, time.
But his time has come now! And in eight years its time for Common Law
Harassment. II dunno what's going on either. Seems like things
are going Okay, though, right? Hey Biden Is Biden! And he's the next
President. Probably! And Kamala Is Kamala. That's My Best Guess!
And she's the next Vice President! Hopefully! Maybe we get even more
#MarvelSummerToRemember Heroes to fill out the cabinet and whatnot! The
point is I'll be back in a little bit.
Common Law Harassment to this ticket is that we are STRONG we are UNITED and
we are DETERMINED to CARVE OUT A FUTURE WHERE PUNS ARE NOT JUST RELEVANT BUT
ENCOURAGED. Anyway, what else is going on and crap. Also I'm not
gonna lie these #ObseseSistersSummerToSitOn are FUNNY and CHARMING. Not
only am I laughing, but I'm laughing WITH them! The one negative thing is
that in one of the first episodes, they're seeing a dietician, and part of it is
like oh we drink 12 cans of Diet Soda a day and he's more concerned about
that than anything else. I DRINK MORE THAN THAT AMOUNT OF DIET SODA A
DAY FOR MY WHOLE LIFETIME. But maybe he's just not on board with the
CAN part of the soda. I don't drink cans of soda! I GET 2 LITER
BOTTLES, POUR 'EM OUT INTO GLASS GLASSES. So its okay That Way, right?
Anyway. #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor almost done.
Joe Biden gonna be A Real Joe Biden Kinda President. Meanwhile, I'm
comfortable predicting Kamala Harris Is Gonna Make Kamala Harris Proud as VP.
The point is YES I added 5 Spare Burritos to Supermarket Delivery. 2
Breakfast Burritos-- 3 Non Breakfast Burritos! They could be Lunch
Burritos. Dinner Burritos. They're small enough that even non #ObeseSummerToSitOn
People could have a SNACK of a Savory Burrito. I don't like getting these
Chewing Gums where they make a relatively big deal about them being Good For
Your Teeth. I mean, look, if I Chew gum twice a month, sure I'm on board
with getting gum that'll whiten my teeth. But if I'm chewing 20 pieces A
DAY then At Some Point MY TEETH ARE GETTING TOO WHITENED.
There's such a thing as Health Overkill. NO there isn't.
Yeah there probably is though. Yeah Probably.
Cool. Making real progress getting through Top
Notch Simpsons Seasons. I think I'm into season NINE by now. Maybe
even TEN. If only there was a way to find out for sure. LMLTURQ...
YES THERE IS. It's MLIURQ!! LMLTURQ... Yep into season 9.
I'm gonna estimate Each Season from now on has a relatively sharp decline MORE
OR LESS. There's some VARIATION but in general that's how ti goes. I
liked how the #ObseseSummerToSitOnSisters made Salad Dressing Sandwiches.
That's how they refered to it. And in the video it looked like a White
Salad Dressing-- those are the least healthy! But the point is hmm
pretty ingenious just a Salad Dressing Sandwich these sisters GOT SOME SMARTS TO
What else is going on and crap. I dunno. BEER
IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS PRESUMABLY. Figure I'll aim for 3-5 drinks a day for
however long into the week that lasts (starting out at 18 cans for the week).
Gotta do something. Anyway I think I'm gonna watch some #ObeseSummerToSister
after this SECTION of entry. I Think Lots Of Things! That has been
the latest, most prevalent thing I've thought of... ever! Well,
great. Sometimes I think about adding a Second Hour of CircleWalking to my
day so that by the time I Leave House For Suresies I'm not over 180 pounds.
But on the other hand I have no reason NOT to double CircleWalk time!
It just Doesn't FEEL RIGHT. I'm a little upset about being 200 pounds by
January 1st but what can I do about As AN INDIVIDUAL.
Not much that'd be my first guess! Hey one more paragraph.
Cool! Man there was one real Thunderous Lightening
15 seconds ago No Foolin' it was like BLAM and I was like OH and then it
was like BOOM and I was like Hmm. I like how the
Ultra-Over-Obese always look like they're squinting because their Faces
are so big Around The Eyes that it makes just Regular Eyes look tiny. I'm not
sure if I like that as much as I UNDERSTAND and EMPHASIZE
with them about it! Anyway I dunno what I'm gonna do for dinner.
Maybe make some pasta even. It'd be DELICIOUS, but I'd have to MAKE IT.
What's an easier option that's also Delicious... I dunno I don't have
all the Dinner Answers. I do know, though, that this part of the entry
is over! Be back in a little bit with a little more!
Come Up With Better Titles Later
like I Cut My Knee at some point in my sleep. Ya know, the Skin Above The Knee.
Not the Knee Kbone itself. Anyway sure, yeah! A scab has already
formed and I didn't even see why it was forming in the first place! Anyway
I'm sure you are all like me and LOVE IT when scabs form because it means TIME
TO PICK AT/ULTIMATELY-OFF THE SCAB! And it's the gift that keeps on
giving! Because if you do it right, The Exact Same Scab Will Reform.
Gotta play your cards right but if you do You'll Be Picking At The Scab The Rest
Of Your Life!
Yeah! The only negative thing is Do I Have Tetanus
Now I Dunno? I dunno what cut me but it easily coulda been some sort
of Sharp Metal. Hmm what Sharp Stuff have I been sleeping with lately.
I'm gonna have to do some deep soul searching on this one. Anyway, if
Biden is only 71% chance to win election, maybe its like there's a 1 in 3
chance some Crazy Shit happens to make it a MONUFUCKINMENTAL HISTORIC Biden
Lopside! Then's a 1 in 3 chance some Crazy Shit happens to make it A Trump
Landslide! And then there's a 1 in 3 chance Nothing That Crazy Shit
Happens, in which case Biden wins, cause that's how far ahead he is right now.
Because if That's The Scenerios We're Looking At BIDEN OVERPERFORMING
THAT PRESUMPTIVE 67% ALRIGHT I GUESS THAT'S THE BEST WE CAN DO FOR NOW RIGHT
SURE I GUESS WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON AND CRAP. So I'm pretty sure
the hundreds of thousands of variables that went into 538 Election Model is just
hmm could be crazy shit in either way, or maybe nothin' that crazy.
WELL THAT WAS EASY.
Fascinating. I think it'd be interesting to see
the relationship between Kamala Harris and Barack Obama. Because Barack
Obama has been Our One Black Friend over the last 12 years and now Suddenly
there's someone new in the picture! I wanna see how they get on with one
another! Fascinating stuff, anyway! And they both know what its like
to work with Joe Biden In The Future. Kamala Harris has only been working
with Joe Biden for roughly 24 hours at this point but hopefully they get there!
I think Kamala Harris is 1/2 Indian American (Not American Indian)... those are
Good Peoples! Have they started Birthering Kamala yet? I mean, gotta
go with what they know, right? That's the first play they run!
I dunno. What else is crappening. Two more
paragraphs to go! #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor has only 1 available-to-me
movie left-- the 2010 Reboot. Then there's 3 or 4 episodes of #ObeseSisterSummerToSitWith
Then there's, well, I guess that's it! Ran out of Potential Life
Experiences at that point. Well I guess I can find out ways to
pay money to see Remaining #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor[You'reScreamingAtThe
Sure, what else is going on, I hope that Hashtag didn't Sretch the Paragraph out
Great, just great. Man Oh Man. I'm gonna be
drinking some beer tomorrow afternoon I Tell You What. I was thinking
about how I used to look at Polls for Elections and was like well that's it,
locked up! Kerry up on Bush 51% to 46%? Margin of error is up to 2%?
In Late September? I literally thought that it means yep 100%
that's WHAT ELECTION WILL BE. Polling Sciences are to be blamed is the
point, not that too many people voted for Trump. No, it's the polls fault,
for not Preparing Us Properly! Seems like a weird, "Hill," to, "Die," On.
I am confident I am sort of using that phrase correctly but, "Not 100% [2-3%
Margin of Error]?" Anyway, great, another entry in the books. Hey it's
my 2/3rds Birthday. 31.667 Years Of Being Alive! Sounds about
right. I'll catch you guys later.
August 11, 2020
It To It
HAVE ANY TITLES PLAN'T OUT FOR THIS ENTRY. I am very Concerned. But
we must Go On. I had a nice Mini Hot Dog Sandwich This Morning AND Last
Night. We're talkin' 1 Saw Dust'r & 1 Dinn'r Roll'...r. 135 cal HOT DOG
SLIDER! And the good news is it reminds me of Hot Dogs which I ENJOY.
Anyway haven't had beer in more than 20 hours! This is a good thing
because there's more to life than alcohol. There's marijuana! And
Enough Alcohol To Power Me Through Life Until I Reach The Point Marijuana
Becomes A Real Lifestyle Option! In The Mean Time Coast On With Alcohol!
HEY Here's a fun idea for when Weed becomes 100% legal-- use it like 3D TV
Glasses to market specific episodes of Televisions with! For the next
episode of Who I Met Whose Mother?, GET YOUR MARIJUANA READY FOR THIS ONE.
And then during the commercial for Ovaltine the secret code is Smoke More
You wanna nice original Proposal Phrase for pot heads?
MARRY U WANNA? And then you both say yes because You Are Both In Love!
With Marijuana! But also Are On Board With Each Other Because The
Marijuana Seems To Be On Board With Them. Yeech. Anyway, figure I'll
Have Some Real Lunch when this section of entry is dunzo. Still gotta
long way to go. Such is life! Somewhere along the line I adapted
the traits that Marijuana tends to bring out in people into My Own, Non-High
Personality. I Could Continue that thought But I Don't Wanna!
HMM, "Yeech," that reminds me, I gotta finish DVDs. Man oh man
imagine if I had marijuana while i was finishing DVDs. They'd be all
like... Yeech! NOW I GET IT the pieces are starting to come
Cool! Every now and then we need a New Kind of Entry.
And the easiest way to do something new is to Not Try At All And It's Nothing At
All. BUT it gets us on a fresh start, gives us room to try something new
again The Next Day. WE NEED RESET ENTRIES EVERY NOW AND THEN IS THE POINT.
That's one of the points, at least. I can think of another half dozen
points off the top of my head! No i can't. I can imagine myself
imagining half a dozen points, but not actually imagining them myself. I
can imagine myself saying I imagine that I would imagine half a dozen Things but
it's really all just in my imagination. Hmm yep that seems to check
out. Real Solid Paragraph.
What other kind of Drugs are there that I can use
everyday which makes Life A Little Bit Better Presumably I Don't Have All The
Details One Way Or The Other. Well there's always macrodosing
Salvia. Or lick allll the hallucinogenic frogs. Or
even just lick ALL the frogs in general. Couldn't hurt! I don't
see how it could! Frogs never had to Evolve to stop People From Licking
Them. Maybe they did! I don't have all the details on Frog
Evolution. Except for how they played an important part in bringing back
dinosaurs, the DNA was spliced. But 1) That's not evolution but A SIMILAR
topic, genetics, and 2) That was just a movie? Jurassic Park? Anyway
if you could pick Any Movie to be real would it be Jurassic Park? On One
Hand-- wow dinosaurs are fun! On Second Hand-- Does this proposal ensure
bringing back dinosaurs will conclusively bring about horror and terror.
Yeah! Oh, great. Probably gonna finish #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
today. Around 60-80% through The Available Ones. Lots of good
options for lunch. I feel like I talked about that a little bit already.
But I forget what My Then Priority Favorite Draft Pick For Lunch would have
been. LMLTURQ. OH GREAT I didn't commit one way or
another, was just talkin' about how I had that SawDustSlider. Maybe a
regular Frozen Meal, that's what I was considering earlier. But I'm too
hungry for that! UNLESS I DO TWO AT A TIME LIKE I'VE ALWAYS DREAM'T!
That sounds like Fun & a Half. On the other hand Ugh just have some
pizza or somethin. A Turkey sandwich and a soup. TOO MANY GOOD
OPTIONS I'M GOING IN INSANE!
THAT'S The Lunch I Settled On
Yep. Wasn't even my first choice! I narrowed it down to Pizza,
Turkey Sandwich + Soup, or Double Frozen Meal... and TBH Pizza was in THIRD
place (also what kind of compulsive liar needed to invent the tbh
acronym). But I had already asked my Parents ahead of time is it ok if
I use the oven and I thought they'd say NO like they always do but they said
YES so I was like well I'm pot committed to using Oven now! So,
sure, that's how that goes. Anyway a couple days ago was the day I learned
what "Til," meant. God Damn Zoomers and their DOZENS of Internet
Acronyms. We got by on a Dozen AT MOST and we WERE JUST PLEASED AS PUNCH
WITH THAT YA FEEL ME. Also what kind of COMPULSIVE LEARNERS need
to be learning something every day. What Is Wrong With These Peoples!
Yeah! Into the oven the pizza goes. 4 minutes
ago. NOw its been in there for a considerable amount of time.
Roughly 2-4 minutes. Gonna err on leaning on 4 minutes if I had to
specify. I guess! We're talkin self made MeetLovers Pizza!
I can't wait. The most rewarding part is eating all of my hard work and
ingenuity. And then pooping it back out again. And then eating it aga...
wait no something went wrong in this scenario. Right? What
else is going on for some reason. Here's a tip-- bathe Hallucinogenic Frog
in LSD and THEN lick 'em. Here's a tip-- bathe yourself in lsd! I
don't see how anything bad can ever come of that! The point is I'd like to
have Section II of entry done by the time Lunch is ready but it'll be close!
WAIT A SECOND STOP THE PRESSES THERE'S A TV SHOW AVAILABLE ON
HULU CALLED 1,000 LB SISTERS!!! MOVE OVER #ELMSTREETSUMMERTOSCREAMFOR
it's time for a #ObeseSistersSummerToSitOn. Only SIX episodes, though.
But Hey Anything Is Better Than Nothing! Also I'm betting they're both 500
pounds. And then together they're 1,000 pound sisters. I'm betting
on this because I am a compulsive gambler but ALSO I've seen these ladies in
Freeze Frames they ain't 1,000 pounds each! I mean, if they were 1,000
pounds each, the title of show would have been THESE SISTERS WEIGH A TON!
BECAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY HOW MUCH THEY'D WEIGH. A ton is
2,000 pounds. That's common knowledge, right?
Probably. What else is going on and crap. Maybe
make myself some eggs for dinner. I haven't made myself some eggs in a
Dog's Age (~3 weeks). That is certainly Some Dogs's Age. Hey check out
my new dog we've had him for three weeks! Yeah but how long have
you had him in DOGS'S WEEKS? I dunno... That's A Thing I
guess, I don't have all the details. Are the results in from whether
Dinosaurs could be hallucinogenic? Or are they just delicious. And
they're pretty much poultry, right? So Dinosaur Is Good For You. II
think that's a great idea, now I really DO think we should spend a trillion
dollars bringing back Dinosaurs. Not for Zoo Stuff but for culinary
purposes! I WANNA EAT THESE STEGGASOURI WHOSE GONA STOP ME YOU?.
I think I'm going crazy because I was just thinking in my head, yeah we all
know at this point dinosaurs are more like birds than reptiles but STILL JUST
LOOK AT THAT IMAGINE OF A DINOSAUR SKIN I HAVE IN MY HEAD LOOKS LIKE A
REPTILE/LIZARD TO ME. I KNOW its wrong but it just FEELS right!
Yeah! Alright! Hey I'm making it through this
entry just fine. I mean it's a piece of shit, but I'm MAKING IT THROUGH
IT. That's the important thing. I'm not foolin', between today
and tomorrow I will FINISH both #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor AND #ObeseSistersSummerToSitOn.
Why would I try to Fool You With That, what would be my motivation? No
motivation, that's who! And anyway, after this entry ony ONE ENTRY TO GO
WITHOUT ALCOHOL. And presumably now that I've flushed out Good Entrying'
Out Of My System we can start from scratch, back to point zero, tic tac toe,
Fresh Start All Over The Place on Thursday! Anyway, was thinking about
when Wes Craven read the script for Scream by Kevin Williamson and Wes
was like You Fuckin' With Me? You Think This Is Funny? You Piece
Of Fuck? Trying To Get My Goat Huh. Why You Smarmy Little Mother
Fucker... I'M ON BOARD YaY!
Here Goes The Rest Of The Entry
Have Lunch To Begin Right Now Too. First time I've MadeAMeetLovers In
The Oven. First time I've used the oven at all in almost 2 weeks!
First time I've been writing this very Specific Paragraph, and after I'm done
with it This Time Around, I may NEVER do it again! I saw Joe Biden VP Pick
has been determined and we all will be made aware of it At Some Point So They
Tell Me. All I know is They Haven't Called Me To Be VP so unless they
wanna risk announcing it without me AGREEING it probably isn't me. That'd
be a risk. What if I say no? Embarrassing all ways around! Do
you have to be 35 for VP. Or can you just be a young VP but if we need a
president nope too young Back To The Back Of THe Line! YEP YA GOTTA
BE 35 FOR VP.
What was the life expectancy in the late 1700's.
Wouldn't Having To Be 35 translate to being like GOTTA ELDERLY today?
THAT'S EXACTLY LIKE IT. Life Expectancy in late 1770's in America was
38. So basically Biden being His Life Expectancy is RIGHT ON TRACK for
that the Constitutionals intended. Then, thinking about this further,
what the Hell why did they set up such an ageist (IN THE WRONG WAY) system.
If we're gonna do Ageisms it should be PRO YOUNG PEOPLE not PRO THE ELDERLY.
What the hell were these Lemonhead Constitution Writers fuckin' with.
Maybe that's why they had Lifetime Appointments to the Supreme Court. It
was more out of convinience. Look you're gonna die any day anyway,
might as well just hold down this office for as long as possible before we get
started on appointing a replacement.
If you're dying at 40 years old, what's middle age?
30-32 years old. Yeah that sounds about right. Anyway I
finished lunch and ya know what I'm Glad I Went With The Pizza. I enjoyed
it very much. Wait a second 30-32 THAT'S ME. I'd be middle
aged for the next 4 months, if it were Colonial Times, and then by next year I'd
be elderly. Dangit that sucks I Enjoy Not Dying Yet. WAIT A
MINUTE GREAT NEWS I've got A YEAR AND A HALF Middle Aged Years Left.
Yes I turn 32 in 4 months but then I'M STILL 32 FOR A WHOLE YEAR! So the
point is I gotta figure out how to make the most of my Age 32 season.
Which in baseball is when you really start to see a clear decline in
performance. Most skills peak around age 27, 28. Hitting for power,
though, peaks around age 29-31. And if you're getting more Intelligent At
Your Sport to make up for losing base athletic skills, your performance is
still gonna be good. But by the time you're 32 your best years are
PROBABLY behind you.
Yeah! I guess. Hey is this the last
paragraph? No it's the next to last paragraph! Alright glad
we got that covered. Anyway another entry in the books. Not as fun
as when I'm drunk but also on the other hand not as STRESSFUL. If I only
have a limited supply of alcohol, that entire 4 or 5 days of the week, I'm
STRESSED OUT worrying about not over consuming it, about getting the most I can
out of it, around deciding best Strategy of When To Drink... IT'S TOO MUCH!
Anywa. Dinner tonight may be, for real, Double Lean Cuisine. Except
Neither Is Lean Cuisine. That's jus the most popular and/or appropriate
name brand I can drop that people'll know what I'm talkin' about!
Wonderful, last paragraph, at last. One would imagine
that there was very high child mortality rate in late 1700's. So, if you
made it to adulthood, you would have longer to live re: overall life expectancy
than you would think Without High Child Mortality Rate, but the rate couldn't be
THAT high, right? Probably. I forget what I was talking about
for the most part but the good news is the entry is just about over.
Anyway. Maybe some sort of Meatloaf for the next week. Better than
No Communal Dinners at all. That's my, "Hot Take." I'll see you guys
August 10, 2020
You To Enjoy Titles
have much of a choice its the only way to Keep You Close To Me. And if I
learned anything from The Cure it's How To Keep People Close To Me. By
playing The Cure Songs. No Ones Gonna Hear Some The Cure Songs and then
Bolt. You're Sticking Around if you hear a The Cure Playlist Goin' Dpwn!
Also The Cure Taught Me All About Making Good Appropriate Titles.
Inbetween Days. Friday I'm In Love. Whattanother Weekday. 32
Days A Month. Anyway, last BeerDay of the week. I
can, "Dig," that. I'm looking forward to Days without Beer to be perfectly
honest. I gotta be Undrunk some of the time! The real point
I'm trying to make is Beatles live in a universe where there's 45 and a half
weeks a year.
Do they? Did they just unlitarilly decide that
they're doing the Regular Seven Days A Week Thing but Forever-Annexing What
Would Be The First Day Of The Next Week into This Past Week? Or are they
like okay same amount of Hours as regular weeks, but we're amking shorter
days, and just dividing the same amount of time into 8 pieces instead of 7.
The point is either way very irresponsible. We all agreed on this Week
Stuff and there's no going back now! Hmm when did Weeks Start.
And is it universal across Ancient Civilizations? I'll look into that JUST
A LITTLE BIT. Hmm what's the quickest way to get to that info.
Google When Did Weeks Start. Or maybe just Ancient Civilizations
Weeks. Or maybe just get started with google, saying ANYTHING, stop
typing Possibilties into Microsfot FrontPage: The Website Program. OKAY
HERE WE GO... google-- WHO INVENTED WEEKS.
BABYLONIANS. I SHOULDA KNOWN IT WAS THEM. THEY
GAVE US WEEKS, THEY GAVE US HAMMURABI'S CODE... JESUS CHRIST THESE BABYLONIANS
ARE UNDERRATED AS FUCK. Ya know all people always remember the
whores of Babylon as if that's a negative thing, but now that we're talking
about it MAN HAVING THE BEST WHORES OF THE ANCIENT WORLD? EVEN BETTER!!!
NOW WE'RE TALKING BEST CIVILIZATION EVER. Anyway. I shuold
know more about Babylon. I've gone through lots of different stuff since
then, and always wanted to be some sort of Creative Jerk All Along, but lets not
forget that there were 4 years or so of Prime Young Adultitude Time where I
thought I was gonna be a high school history teacher. And in my mind, I
enjoyed the American Half of High School History, but I Really Dug The World
History Half. Ancient History. It's It's like watching THREE EPIC
HISTORICAL SAGA MOVIES EVERY WEEK THROUGH TEXTBOOK. And If I know
anything about movies its that THEY COME ALIVE IN HISTORY TEXTBOOKS FOR HIGH
Even in Pre-Global History does Babylonian Not Get A Fair
Rep. My memory is basically like yep they're legit one of the first
all-out civilizations, kinda on par wth Ancient Egypt, but these wacky guys
still didn't have it all figured out yet! They didn't have CHRIST or
anything. I think that's how Post-High School Americans think about
history. Was CHRIST on board with these folks? Oh, this was
befoer Jesus Of Christ? Well then I just couldn't care less at all!
If Jesus wanted me to care about something he'd have been around when that
something was still going on! That settles THAT once and for all.
The phrase once and for all seems kind of pompous. The idea that
you could Settle this Once And For All-- on your FIRST TRY-- kinda pompous.
Hey I'm Only Gonna Do This Once-- and it'll be For All-- that's how good I am at
My First Try!
Yeah! I dunno. What was my Favorite History
Movie. Some good Rome Movies. Not a Gladiator-centric movie, but
more a Military War Army Battle-centric movie. Napoleon, never been a good
movie about that! THE BYZENTINE EMPIRE. Hey how 'bout some GENGHIS
KHAN. Genghis Khan's stake of Pop Culture History is Near ZERO. That
hardly seems fair to the descendents of Genghis Khan (90% of Europe and/or
Asia). The point is Yes The Man Did His Fair Share Of Raping.
I could very easily be a descendent of Genghis Khan. You can be. We
can both be! Anyway, yeah. FInishing last 3 beers today. Then
2 days without beer. Then More beer, but re-assess how I'd like to plan
and carry out portioning it over the Next Week After That. I feel bad for
Genghis Khan's son/Kublai Khan's Father. I guess GREATNESS skips a
generation. This jerk. Was probably a crappy son AND a crappy
father! His father and son, though, they knew the score Eevn Without His
Otherwise your life would be unpleasurable. ANd where's the pleasure in
that! UN, that's where!
Yeah. Better look up Missing-Link-Khan or else I'll be doomed to suffer
his fate! Hmm lets lturq... TULOI. Not even
Tuloi Khan-- Just Tuloi. Although Also Called Tuloi Khan Bbut
More Often Just Luloi. The Khan Formerly Known As Tuloi. It's like
It's like that HiddenHalfwayGeneration where George HW Bush had a Secret Son
who was George W Bush's Secret Father. OOps just blew the whole lid of
that operation. Except if we're talking about the Bush Dynasty you
know what I think I'll STickk With The GEneration THat Has Done The Least Harm.
And is the least noteworthy. Let HW Be Genghis and W be Kublai.
I'M GONNA BE TULOI! Anyway, 2 #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor movies
in, and, yeesh, I dunno. I think it's a GOOD thing that these movies
exist, in the abstract. But in terms of Having To Watch Them? I
Don't 100% GET IT. Also each movie is the same thing! Kids
have nightmares. Nightmares is Frederick Krueger. Some die, some
survive, at the end maybe Did They Survive At All? and then The Next Movie
Anyway solidly into August at this point. So solidly
into August that it's socially acceptable that we start looking forward to
September. Wake em up when September ends. That's September
1st! That's when September Ends August. I remember listening to
American Idiot: The Music Album by Green Day on the train a lot, and thinking
yeah but it's cool though because the 1/3 of the songs I'M SUPPOSED to love are
only the MID THIRD in terms of songs I enjoy. Blvd of Broken Dreams?
I'M NO KID CHUMP I ONLY LIKE THIS SNOG NOT AS MUCH AS THE JESUS OF
SURBURBIA SONG. Anyway American Day: Green Idiot was the Democrat's May
Surprise. It was a very political record at the time and it powered the
Democrats victory By A Few Degrees In The Wrong Direction? As it
turns out, it didn't pan out the wya they hoped, and that's even with having
John Jerry: The Poppiest Punk Imaginable, so I guess It Just Wasn't Our Year.
I guess. GREEN DAY WAS PLAYING THE LONG GAME.
They didn't get Khan Kerry elected but they influenced, through song, my
generation into Being Like YEAH AMERICAN IDIOTS THAT SUMS THAT UP for
Many Generations To Come. No, I blame Eminem for 2004 Election Results,
he had a September Surprise Political Song that ALSO let us down. I dunno.
What else is going on and crap. Didn't impact the election but Surprise
Songs did implant in our brains the idea that Elections Are There To Be
Impacted. And that they're not just some abstract thing that
happens at levels above (and/or below?) us that we can't comprehend, that we
shouldn't even bother getting engaged in. Green Day proved to be The
American Idiot of 2004 but they Live To Fight Another Day.
Yeah! The point is I'm gonna have The Bagel With Creamt
Cheese for lunch in a little bit, when Part III of entry commences and whatnot.
And I got that going for me All Day is the point. Until it's over.
Then it's still happening in Some Sense (Remember Time is fluid) but for the
most part Time To Move On With My Post-Lunch Life. If I had to pick 50 Of
My Top Albums of My Lifetime, I'd DEFINITELY pick the September Surprise Eminem
Anthem MOSH. Except for Not Definitely. IT WAS FINE,
I listened to it probably SLIGHTLY MORE than my fair share. But anyway
the point is I dunno what else is going on and crap. Anyway if I could
propose an election night meme-- picture of Chris Tucker above someone's body
(Presumably Trump) and the text YOU GOT KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT.
Because that's a good thing. I'd be happy with that!
Cool! What else is going on and crap. So the
point is Ice Cube becomes president. Until he is appointed and then
Dissolves The Office Permanently because Ice Cube is an Anonymous Anarchist.
I wonder what it'd be like to have the MAIN impression of Cube as being a hard
Rapper and the SECONDARY impression that he's a funny actor. As opposed to
ME where it's reversed! Because once you're Funny you can't go back to
Hard 100%. Just can't be done. But you can be hard and then go on to
be funny. It Even Makes Ya Funnier! You're Hard, so if we're not
laughing, You Could Beat Us Up! That sums that up. I had
Friday on DVD. I think I was (I'm sure I mentioned this here before
for some reason) like, if I ever have a black friend WE'RE GONNA NEED
SOMETHING TO WATCH!
Yeesh. Also, remember, I was a teenager Before ANY
Streaming Service. Owning DVDs actually has a presumptive purpose!
Well, not for ME specifically, I had no friends and ended up Never Having No
Friends. But if you knew you would have company, having 200 DVDs could
really work out in your favor. And it gave ME the PEACE OF MIND that if I
ever had friends or Girl Friend, I'd be covered. Never panned out that way
but I was PREPARED is the point, I was READY for any situation that life threw
me! The point is I got some Bagel Going on in a little bit when Entry is
Resumed. What other good movies would be History Battles. I
dunno ALL OF THEM. I can't pick! Probably that one with the guy
who was in ROME I wanna say? Then something happened with Shakespeare
Thought About writing about them but it Never Panned Out.
Seems To Check Out
Yep seems to check out.
Having some nice Bagel w/ Butter! Was gonna have Creamt Cheese! We
didn't have enough On Stock! Had to go with the butter! And THANK
GOD because it's DELICIOUS! What other songs Motivated Us in 2004 For
Election. Still a solid 6 months before Weezer Implored Us All To,
"Make Believe." More or less. The point is I toasted this Bagel
On POINT. Maybe 1/10th more toasted, MAYBE. But no lighter.
Anyway, jeez, whatta do when this entry is over. Back to #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor!
Is tere anything to the Scam of Johnnie Depp breakthroughing In General with a #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
(main character with pointy fingers)and then breakingthorughtothenextlevel with
Edward Scissorhands (main character with pointy fingers). Is that how he
got the job with Edward Scissorhands? Yes I Already Have Experience
with movies where a guy has several sharpnesses to his hands.
Sounds about right. Anyway, I dunno. My Dad
is in my room RIGHT NOW. He's getting stuff out of his (OUR) file cabinet.
I guess it's His File Cabinet but I sorta rent the space out to him.
That's where I come up with my portion of Other Finanicies. It's a trade
off so that I'll store his File Cabinet. Anyway, what else is going on and
crap. Haven't started Beer #3 of 3! I will in a couple of minutes!
Anyway I chose to store this file cabinet in my room in case I ever had a black
friend in high school and they came over and was like well where are all your
files? Sounds about right! Anyway how many paragraphs do I still
have to write. Looks like 3. Definitely seems to be three more
paragrpahs to write. Three. The number between 2 and 4. The
INTEGER between 2 and 4.
Yeesh. There is no #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
#3 on HBOMax. THERE IS NO INTEGER BETWEEN 2 AND 4! Gotta go
straight to 4, then tehre's 5, then there's a reboot. That's the
only #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor that I've got In Store for me. I go
back to high school, join the Speech & Debate team, and offer my Reboot-ull.
To some Debate Jerk. You know what I'm talkin' about! Anyway I
dunno what I'm gonna do for dinner. Have about 2/3rds of a Chicken FingeR
as well as some rice I've been teasing Me Eating That all week since I got it!
Finished all Corned Beef. Could have a Turkington Sandwich though (TurkeY).
Just looked at Edward Scissorhands and my instinctual reaction was WTH
MicrosoftFrontPage Doesn't Recognize Scissorhands as a word?!?!
Cause I'm A Dummy!
Cool! I could have another bagel for dinner. Man
Oh Man would that be an excellent Repetitive. Anyway been a while since I
had a Nice Communal Dinner. Figure that's in store at some point.
I'd be, "Down," for some Pasta& (HIDDEN) Meat Sauce. Except for Man ALL
THAT STANDING. Just Doin' Nothin. Too much standing! If I
learned anything from my Father, the main bst way to prove your manhood is by
Being A Guy Who Likes To Stand. It's good because its POLITE.
Anytime you're with your family, with a limited amount of seats, you're like
IM THE MAN OF THE HOUSE ILL BEAR THE BRUNT OF THIS UNFORTUNATENESS. YOU
TAKE A SEAT. But also its like YES STANDING IS WORK, HARD WORK, BUT
THAT'S JUSt THE KIND OF GUY I AM I'M A WORKAHOLIC. And also it leads
you to say, if this ever were to become the topic of conversation, WELL
PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY I'M OUTSTANDING.
Yeah! I dunno Another Entry In The Book
Almost! Yep gonna file it away in This Room Cabinet once I'm done.
Cool. #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor about to resume. Well, what
else is going on. Is there any New TV for Fall Semester. Also I'm
back in college? Or high school? Anything that has Fall Semesters,
really, that's what I've narrowed it down to. I may be out of Alcohol
but I still have bagels and I'm under the impression that Bagels are 99% the
same thing as alcohol. CHEMICALLY. Crunch the numbers and you'll get
to the bottom of that theory. Toast the bagel hard enough and you'll be
able to crunch the bagels themselves. Well, great. #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
resumes with Nightmare On Elm Street IV: What Happened To III: Atual Title Is
The Dream Master. I'll keep you updated on this situation as it
August 9, 2020
Well, hey, here we are on a beautiful Sunday Morning. One would imagine.
Yep it is Sunday Morning that does seem to check out. COLLOQUIALLY.
It's actually Past Noon but AMong Friends and Family and Familiars In
General we may say Post Noon, Pre 1:00 PM, is still Morning. I know
there's a lot of worrying about the Postal Service but have they thought about
hiring Scottie Pippin I BELIEVE BEING ASSIST GUY IN BASKETBALL IS LIKE ITS IN
THE MAIL I'M DELIVERING THE BALL TO MJ. It's like hey when is
MJ gonna score his next basket. ANd the answer is It's in the mail!
And you're like wow this entire conversation so far, it is going on Post
Scottie Pippen Passing The Ball but Pre Michael Jordan attaining it?
And we're all like yeah this paragraphs seems to make sense, all is adding
Here's a good way to market 90 Bulls-- IT'S THE FATHER THE
SON AND THE HOLY GHOST. And for The Father they show a
picture of Scottie Pippin. And then for The Son they show a picture
of Dennis Rodman. And then or The Holy Ghost it's Why Who Else
It's Just Michael Jordan! Is there any sect of Christianity where its
like Yeah the father and son are all well and good but it's The Holy Ghost
you really gotta look out for. Probably! Current thought about
Drinking Portions for the rest of the week are Drink 4 beers today, then there's
3 left over for next three days, and don't drink AT ALL for entry, but have 1
drink each EVENING. It's more how regular people operate. They do
Job then enjoy drink to relax later, as a motivator perhaps. Instead of
using Drink as a way to get through Job. Seems like I'm on the
right side of society with doing that for the next 3 days and then who knows
what comes after that.
Well that's great, just great. #PostOfficeSummerToRemember.
Will this Summer spell DOOM for Post Office, or it will be a wonderful shot at
redemption for the Post Office! I Dunno! Someone's gotta come out on
top re: Post Office I DUNNO HOW THIS ONE IS GONNA TURN OUT! Why does the
Post Office need to be redeemed. I dunno why did Andy Dufresne need to
be redeemed, same situation. It seems like a good Tipping State
type situation, but instead of for deciding Election Winner, its in terms of
indicating and/or influencing whether we work our way back in to Solidly A
Democracy, or devolve further into Solidly An Fascist Autocratic Kleptocracy.
As The Post Office Goes, so goes our Nation. Hmm seems about
right I'm Right Clever with this paragraph I Am! I think the reason Andy
Dufresne needed redeeming is because of his name. Stupid name. I
could only imagine how I might have pronounced it if I Read The Story instead of
Seeing The Movie.
Actually I can't even imagine it! Not only do I
not know, but I can't even make Step One regarding Even Just Imagining It.
Oh well such is life. Anyway the point is I had a cup o noodles
last night for dinner but It Didn't Go Quite The Way I Planned! Here's
What Happened-- I go downstairs to boil some water. That's how Cup O
Noodles Goes. You boil water, pour it into Styrofoam Cup Containing
Hardened Noodles, then it becomes Said Cup O Noodles. Anyway my Dad JUST
made tea-- but not to 100% boiling. It was maybe 85% there. PLUS
there was only so many waters left. So basically I pour around 66.7% water
needed, at 85% the heat... wasn't enough! So in teh mean time I need to
sip up this water so that I could replace it in 10 minutes with The Right Amount
Of Water At The Right Amount Of Heat. So basically I just drank hot water
for over 5 minutes, then had the cup o noodles, And The REST Is History!
I guess. Just left the house for a solid 4-5 seconds
without pants. I was wearing Boxers: The Pants Of Underwear, and there was
no one nearby, so Yeah I pressed my luck and took in a Big Box which was what I
set out to get in the first place. And the good news is I get to take a
nice easy break after this paragraph. I feel like I accomplished a lot.
Reference to being done with NBASummerToRemember. Drew Parallelograms
between Post Office And The Rest Of Our Bullcrap Going On. Is it
possible that when Trump is talking about Talking With Generals he's just
talking about His New Crony, The Postmaster General. My guess is
either that or General Car Insurance. THEY'RE TRYING TO, "CANCEL,"
THE POST OFFICE. I hope they, "Fail," because that's the dumbest
thing I ever heard. Not that it's ridiculous and can't happen! That
it IS happening. So fuckin' dumb.
Summer 2020 For Ya
accomplished #MarvelSummerToRemember, that's the big one. We also did #StarWarsSummerToDoSomething.
We got up to around 75% of #DickVanDykeSummerForTheAges. ITS NICE TO
HAVE STRUCTURE. So what do I do now. Ya know what FINISHING
DICKVANDYKES seems like a solid way to go. We Must Take Care Of Our
Responsibilities! My Responsibility is to Watch More Episodes of Dick Van
Dyke: The Hit Television Program From A Considerable Amount Of Time Ago!
Hmm what else. I accomplished #BasketballSummerForAHalfAWeek. #SimpsonsSummerSlowlyButSurely.
I dunno. Isn't that a movie. 500 Summers of Basketball.
Something like that. I think I'm confusing Somehow Six Things At Once.
There's only FOUR WORDS in that sentence/phrase, how could I be SO confused that
it's 6 things! Alright lets go through it If You Doubt Me.
500 days of summer. Summer of Sam [directed by Spike Lee Who Likes
Basketball]. Love and Basketball. OF... well that's four things,
that's pretty close.
Anyway, yeesh! What happens after Electoral College
Votes are re-assessed (I assume after 2020 census?). Is 538 gonna change
its name? Or not. I can easily see it being a toss-up. What
BRAND has Nate Silver & Co. facilitated. The kind of people who would be
on with a RETRO TONGUE IN CHEEK Hey 538 USED TO MEAN SOMETHING LOL.
Or will he be like Well I cannot in good conscience continuing using this
name. HMM I JUST LEARNT SOMETHING. It HAS to be
538. That's interesting! And I guess with population change it's
just redone in Proportions on a State By State basis. HEY I TAUGHT US
ALL SOMETHING I HAVE FULFILLED MY DUTIES AS
EX-SOCIAL-STUDIES-TEACHER-STUDENT-STUDENT-TEACHER. What if I went with
a NightmareOnElmStreetSummerToScreamFor. I like the sounds of
that! #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor. I Like The Sounds Of That A Lot!
Only 5 of them on HBO2ThaMax. I could have sword a week ago it was 6 or 7!
Oh well that's still plenty. #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor. I can
What else is going on and crap. I feel I should clarify
past statements I made in regards to getting, "On Board," with Basketball.
It was a flight of fancy. I knew all along it probably would never come to
fruition, but I gave myself just enough rope to hang myself in regards to
commiting to looking into an #NBAFutureToRemember. Ad I still can't say
for certain! But I wouldn't count on it. Probably not, at least.
There's gotta be better stuff you can count on, that's my feelings. I'm
gonna be, "100 Percent 'On The Real," with you-- I'm gonna start my
ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor DURING THE NEXT BREAK FROM ENTRY. I feel like
I've seen most of these movies before but this time around I'M FOCUSED,
DETERMINED TO ENJOY, 100 PERCENT ON THE REAL WITH THE DEAL! I dunno
what's going on anymore.
Yay! I dunno what else is going on. If you
said I could have THe Newest Video Game System with All The Games, or if I could
have ANY of the past systems I had with, let's say, a dozen and a half games for
either one-- I'd go with Nostalgia Video Games! Also Gameboy would
be the one I want LEAST in terms of PLAYABILITY but I would want MOST in terms
of I don't have a TV so Either This or Game Gear is my only real option!
Dreamcast. I only had that as Primary Video Game Console for 18 or so
months? But I MISS IT. I miss All The Video Games. It's
important or kids to be Raised On Video Games. That's how we learn life is
One Big Video Game and The Only Way To Win is to Never Stop Playing.
Yep seems to check out. I guess! I was
just thinking about Video Games, then thinking about Michael Jordan (He was a
winner at GAMES just not VIDEO games), then was thinking about Michael Jordan
stuntin' for McDonalds.. and I was like oh right Fast Food Hamburgers those
are delicious! And then I was like Hmm Fast Food Hamburgers being
delicious THIS HAS GOT TO GO IN THE BLOG. If I know anything about
dietary priorities from watching Professional Athlete's Sponsorships, it's
that Drinking Sugar Water and Eating Hamburgers is THE ONLY WAY to get to the
top. Maybe that's why I like White Castle. It's like a they
should shrink down Basketball so I Could excel at it. They shrunk down
Hamburgers to increase my self esteem Over The Hamburger Now I've got it IN
THE PALM OF MY HANDS VERY QUITE LITERALLY.
Yep that all seems to pan out. Also I dunno
whatever happened to my Asian Friend (Friend is a strong word... but not totally
Out Of The Question word) in middle school who was great at football. He
didn't go to Stuyvesant as far as I remember? Coulda been Bronx Science!
Maybe a Third Place! Also I think he was a big Christ Guy. I
vaguely remember seeing that Here Or There Or Something. Well when
you got Recess Football Skills like that You Can Believe Whatever You Want!
yeah! It's fun, though, because we would basically play Gifted Class
Versus Everyone Else, and in general We In The Gifted Class Were Notably Worse,
but this guy was head and shoulders above Everyone!
guess I'm getting a bit ahead of myself with that title. We don't know for
sure there will be An Summer of 2021. My guess is yes but That's
For The Voters To Decide! Hey I'm definitely watching some #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
after this section of entry! Sometimes I like to add A Lot Of Salt to
whatever I'm making under the premise of well it can't HURT! But It
Can, both in terms of taste and health. But my INSTINCT is that no harm
could come of an obscene amount of salt. The point is after Current
Lunch is over, no more HalfPotatoSpheres nor BBQ Salmon Filets. Yeah!
Man Oh Man I'm gonna watch These Movies WITHOUT BEING ON MY PHONE. Really
commit myself to doing it right! Might as well.
Cool. Dinner'll be most likely (in terms of plurality)
Remaining Chicken FingeR and remaining Spanish Yellow Rice. UPDATE
that's now Most Likeliest Meal #TWO... new Likely #1 Meal is SANDWICH +
Rice[or soup]. I have enough Corned Beef to make that solidly THE BASE
of the sandwich. Not enough for a sandwich. But enough that it's
more than 50% of the meat of the sandwich. So the point is I got that
going for me what else is going on and what do you have going for you and stuff
like that. Would there be any good SHOCKERS that a VP Pick could be?
I mean, there's several BILLION shockers. You know what? FOrget
several billion-- there's 99.99999999995% of ALL HUMAN PICKS which would be
shockers (And if we're dropping the, "Human," Criteria, it's damn near
incalculable to estimate how many Shocker Picks There Might Be!)
What if Biden chooses someone that NOBODY wants as VP and he
comes out as Heel. This whole time we thought Trump was Heel and Biden was
BabyFace but they could switch it up on us! Well, there's no way they can
convince us Trump is Babyface. But they could sell us the narrative
there's no good option. LET EM TRY I'M BEHIND BIDEN BABYFACE OR HEEL OR
WHATVER that's how much of a Heel Trump Is In Real Life! But the point is
I wouldn't put it past Vince McMahon to try to confuse us by having Joe Biden
make a Terrible VP Pick. That's really the only point I'm trying to make!
Oh, right. I'm getting close to being done with this entry! Only 2
or 3 more paragraphs or so! Cool. The point is Yes Mankind (Mick
Foley) would make a GREAT VP pick and not just based on personality/liability.
Mick Foley (Mankind) was one of the main members of the Storyline Wrestling Team
of The Union. Who were the briefly lived antagonists to the Heel
Corporation. Making people into unions is a good swing issue.
Hey I dunno about what I personally believe but I empirically have more money
and benefits thanks to Union than if there Was No Union so Well There You Have
I dunno. I'm just starting to come to terms with
the fact that we will be under Quarantine For Halloween. And then
presumably in the next 4 or so days it will magically lift and we can vote in
elections. But, for now, NO HALLOWEEN? I WAS SUPPOSED TO GO
TRICK AND/OR TREATING NOW ALL THOSE PLANS HAVE GONE TO PUTT. The point
is Halloween is in the top half dozen of Holidays that are Markers throughout
the year. Hmm, first round -- New Years, Valentines, Memorial Day, July
4th, Halloween, JesusDay. Those are MY top 6! What are yours? E-mail
me your Top 6 Holidays-As-Marker-Days and if we agree you may just be on the
right side of this issue! Look the 2nd half of the year is a lot
murkier than the first half. Valentines Day is a NECESSITY because
there's a lot of snoozers in the first half (what else ya go, PRESIDENT'D DAY?
SAINT PATRICK'S DAY?!!?) but in the 2nd half we're so crowded I left out
THANKSGIVINGS DAYS? WOW WHAT A SACRIFICE. Oh, right. The
point is Halloween is A Purposeful Holiday Marker. And if we can't trick
or treat THERE'S GONNA BE HELL TO PAY. Also at what point is it a
think in Hipster Places where they decide ahead of time WERE GONNA START
TRICK OR TREATING AGAIN. PLEASE COVER THIS, NEWS MEDIA, SO WE DON'T LOOK
COMPLETELY INSANE. I'd say there's a good shot that happens at one
point or another. I kinda HOPE NOT but that ain't gonna stop it!
Wonderful. Anyway theres no Jesus Day.
There's Jesus Begins (Christmas) and then there's The White Knight Rises
(Easter). Hey last paragraph of the entry. I can, "Dig," That!
Anyway, jeez, I Dunno. Man Freakin' Closin' In On HALF A YEAR in
Quarantine in a month. And what do I have to show for it. Still
Being Alive? And my Parent Suite-Mates are still alive? Yeah I Guess
That Ain't So Bad. It's better than us NOT still being alive!
Empirically! Well, great, just great, that's the end of the entry. #ElmStreetSummerToScreamFor
is About To Commence! I'll meet ya back here tomorrow and tell you How
That's Working Out For Me.
August 8, 2020
No, wait, what I mean is FascIST. I shall fascist.
And also by I, I mean you, or someone else, not ME literally. Me
figuratively Meaning Some Other Guy(s). Anyway I think its good that
Trump's latest array into fascism is Postal Service. It's good for the
side-effects of disrupting election, disrupting Census Taking, and sabotaging
the financial solvency of the organization so people will rely on private-sector
options... but also hey this is just plain authoritarianism, too. Trump
has made The Postal Service into his own image. Which presumably leads
to Trump Is On All The Stamps Now? And now they're just called Trumps?
Anyway, jeez. What else is going on.
I dunno! Made some more progress in Basketball: The
Michael Jordan Show Documentary to the point I'm pretty confident I'll finish it
tonight. Yeah! Anyway 1st 2 days of BeerWeek I only had 3 cans, not
4! You know what that means! It means I have 2 more beers for the
next 5 days than if I had had 4 beers over the last 2 days. I've crunched
the numbers on this over and over in my Spare Time so I'm pretty confident the
math is firing on all cylinders. Anyway we're getting into the Dog
Days of August. Because Dogs Sweat A Lot? So in August Both Us
And Our Dogs Are Sweating. That's always been my interpretation of that
phrase. Solid 40% chance it's more or less 100% accurate.
I've never had a dog, a bit too THREATENED by them.
Even a medium sized dog. I feel like a dog in th 50th percentile and up
Sized Dog could take me in a fight. And I mean NOW, to say nothing of
where I was as a child, or a pre-teen, or a teen, or a 20's Man, or, well, Now,
yah! What's going on again? Oh, right. Dogs could beat me up.
Gotta play it safe with your pets gotta make sure they know whose boss.
Are there any pets you can get where It's Understood They're The Boss.
I guess to some extent, every relation is a back-and-forth, give-and-take type
thing. It's about finding a BALANCE of whose in charge, You Or Your Family
Pets. Well there was Son Of Sam. But that wasn't HIS Dog.
If it was that'd be a whole different story! I guess!
Whatever. Arizona ain't so small a swing state.
10 Electorates? That's not bad. I was too quick to Get Arizona's
Goat last day (Yesterday). It's always bothered me about the GOAT
phrase (Greatest Of All Time) and the other definition of Goat (Weird Stupid
Animal Just Look At This Animal Stupidest Animal I've Ever Seen). So each
definition is way off from corresponding with the other definition. I
dunno who the NBA GOAT is, I'm under the impression it's either Michael Jordan
or Lebron James, but either way, don't associate them with GOATS: The Animal.
It's the stupidest animal just look at it! These MEN are SMART and Great
at Sports! Librarian James. Not sure what that accomplishes.
My best guess is Nothing At All.
Yeesh. Starting Beer Right About Now. I want the
kinda Basketball Game where it was like On Nintendo 64 and it was Always Just
Three ON Three Basketball. I think it was called NBA JAM.
That was fun, anymore than 3 people per team and I Get Confused! NBA
Jam was only 2 on 2. I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.
Pretty sure it was 3 on... oh that's where I got confused. I was
always playing THREE on ONE. When I was playing I always defected and
played the role of Traitor and joined the other team, leaving my supposed
Basketball Partner Alone. I like to be on WINNING TEAMS if that means
abandoning my basketball partner to form a lopsided team with the opposing team
I'LL DO THAT SOMETIMES. What was I talking about again?
It doesn't matter. I don't like the framing of
should they do the presidential debates in terms of hmm both are gaffe
prone, it might be risky to do it for either of them,... cause the point is
WE NEED TO HAEV DISCUSSIONS ABOUT THINGS. No debates means more Voting On
Nothings. WE GOT STUFF WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT WE NEED THEM DEBATES.
It's not enough to point out how Trump is unfit to be president. We also
need to show how He's On The Wrong Side Of 96% OF EVERY ISSUE. That's the
important part! It is with this spirit and determination that I'd like
to submit myself for consideration in the roll of Debate Moderator.
...Hmm lemme stop you right there NO? you just said Trump is wrong on 96% of the
issues. NOPE LEMME STOP YOU THERE! I didn't say he was
wrong on 96% of the issues. I said, for each individual issue, he was
wrong for 96% of it! For Each INDIVIDUAL Issue!
Anyway got my Updated ID Card in the mail! Michael
Jordan was from North Carolina (still is!). That's a Swingers State.
Virginia is for Swingers. But in Election is Solid Blue). The
point is I forget. I'd love some Presidential Debates. I can see
Trump getting bored even before it starts talking about the issues.
Literally any issue they're talking about he'll go it doesn't matter, you
have to look at the overall, I'm doing the right thing people count on me, and
if they don't well that's a hoax hopefully they election will turn out the
way it should because otherwise something very bad might happen. Uh
Oh I Don't Like The Sound Of That At All. In terms of What That
Would Do To The Country. I like the sound of it in terms of hey way to
write a Completely plausible Trumpffensive. That's his strategy Term for
election. He's going on the TRUMPFFENSIVE.
One more paragraph for this section of entry.
DONALD TRUMP IS THE GOAT! That's a bipartisan statement, right?
I feel like that statement could be approved by about 90% of the general public.
Aren't goats Democrats? No you're thinking of Donkeys. I
dunno goats are ALSO Democrats, I think. I KNOW definitely Donkeys.
I guess that's all I do know. Most likely lunch'll be Last Chicken
Finger and Remains of Spanish Rice. That's all I do know. And
even that, knowing that, is just reaffirming the probability of that statement,
I'm not saying it'll actually turn out that way. Huh. Man oh
man I get to watch more Fiction after Basketball Documentary is over!
That's fun because Fiction Tells You How To Feel About The Main Characters.
Hmm, basketball, people have positive traits and negative traits, good things
happen to people sometimes and sometimes bad things happen to people, it's a
complicated murky world that's capable of inspiration or beauty or bad things...
YEP I SEE WHAT I'M GETTING AT, BETTER WATCH SOME DICK VAN DYKES.
Huh? Adequate, Am I? Mediocre, Shall You?!
Anyway, was just
thinking about what was your favorite
basketball, and I guess Scottie Pippin is a good role model but also
Spalding has the market cornered. I wonder what my main impression of
Michael Jordan would have been If Not For Space Jam. I was just A LITTLE
BIT too young and A LITTLE BIT too white to be on the Michael Jordan Is
Basketball Train. If I was 2 years older and just as white? On
Board. If I was 2 shades darker and the same age? On Board.
This is the life the universe has dealt us, and my main impression was a Looney
Tunes Movie released when I was 7 or 8. And then we can't forget the
Lil Bow Wow Vehicle Like Mike. I really wish we could. I
wish we could but this is the lives the universe has dealt us.
What else is going on and crap. I am now facing
North. You'd think it'd be like Looking UP but for some reason it feels
more like Looking DOWN. I think it's because of Where The Street Is
Compared to My House. The way you get to my house is from the South.
So when you're facing South that's like The UP of my house. So facing
North is like the Down From My House. I feel very strongly about this,
I dunno, this is just a part of who I am. Facing North?
NORTHFACE? THEY MAKE WINTER JACKETS IS MY IMPRESSION. The point
is I'd be pleased as punch if Arizona gave their electoral colleges to me.
Arizona huh, if I know anything about colleges its that Arizona Electoral
Colleges are SAFETY SCHOOLS AT BEST. Gottem. Aren't
there a bunch of Terrible Colleges In Arizona? I may just be thinking
about John McCain. Huh.
Thinkin' about states, I just thought of one of my Dad's
Top Jokes (well, out of several dozen Top Jokes.) What State is when
you.. uh... wanna get to know knowledge from a female entity or something [he
phrased it better than I just did]? And the punch line is.
I'LL ASK 'uh[er]! SO now you have a bit of a better picture
on why I Am Who I Am. What state is when you OWE a Female Entity a
debt. Oh Kansas. Yep that seems to check out.
Maybe it's just specific to Me And Who I Am At This Age And Where I Am In Life,
but is there a thing for men where it's like, you're about to have kids, and
you're like well I clearly have no idea how to do this... Ya Know What I
Think I'm just gonna 100% do what I think MY Dad would have done and act how MY
Dad would have acted. Because that seems like a nice easy cop out way
to raise children! Hey my parents did pretty good. I turned out
pretty okay! In this scenario, I have a wife and kids! That's Pretty
Good All By Itself!
Well, great, what else is going on and crap.
What do you say if someone in England asks you if You have known, in the past,
Some Place In Englland. New York, New Jersey, New Hampshire, NOT New
Mexico [Be careful out there this state is designed to trip you up!].
New Carolina. I dunno, lets move on. I'm assuming there are,
"Yorks," "Hampshires," and, "Jerseys," somewhere around the English Countryside.
Also Also what kind of extreme lack of imagination leads you to name states
NEW anythingelse. HEY HERE'S A GREAT NEW 5% OF AMERICA WHAT DO WE
MAKE OF THIS AWESOME NEW AREA. eh remember that old place? Lets jus
stick with that place, and then slap a new, "New," in front of it.
CMON THIS STATE COULD BE THE GREATEST THING SINCE BEE'S KNEES, GIVE IT AN
I dunno. Probably not, at least. When I
was a kid, I was always like, what would MY DAD would have done when he was a
kid. The point is I'm lazy and lack personality so I just go ahead
and do what the nearest male role model may or may not have done.
You'd be surprised at how convenient and easy a way that is to live life!
I see Chicago Bulls of 1990's were into The TRIANGLE formulation.
Because they, too, conceived of the game of basketball as being at its heart a 3
on 1 game. 3 sides to a triangle! More importantly, three CORNERS
of a triangle. Also they were inspired by James Carville, who is still
the prominent top best political strategist Of Our Time, and his theory of
Triangulation. I dunno what this paragraph means. I don't know
what this paragraph means at all! Huh. HAH!
Carville, you mean like a garage? I said that a week or two ago!
It's pretty nice to have One Thing A Week I Myself Enjoy.
Triangles are all well and good but have they heard the
good news about Parallelograms. I wanna see a Parallelogram Offense.
Or defense. And then that leaves only One Person left over. The 5th
man is a floater. The parallelogram, though, that's where the basketball
magic happens. Anyway, I dunno. Michael Jordan got a lot of shit
for being a gambling addict but that's only because he failed at gambling more
than he won! If he gambled all the time and won all the time no one would
have said Word One! OH ITS SUDDENLY AN UNHEALTHY ADDICTION WHEN YOU'RE
LOSING MILLIONS OF DOLLARS. I DIDN'T HEAR ANYONE COMPLAIN AND SAY I HAD A
PROBLEM THAT TIME I WON A THOUSAND DOLLARS. I dunno. I'll be
back in a little bit with Part III!
Michael Jordan of Nothing
Now we're talking!
Well, part III of the entry. Got some lunch going. We're talkin'
Frozen Pizza Turned Into MeetLovers Pizza. It tastes good because I
enjoy the ingredients. The Ham I could do without, but Remembering
Consciously hey this makes it a MeatLovers, somehow that makes it better
than it really is! Anyway, Another Factor Of TWo that could have made
me more aware and interested in MJ-- two inches taller. I guess,
sure, why not. My Dad keeps predicting To Me that Trump is gonna Dump
Pence and pick a new VP. I don't see it! But My Dad is a pretty
smart guy, and if it turns out accurate, now you can be like Oh man
Crazysheet's Dad is great at predictions! Which would lead me to predict
Crazysheet would be great at predictions. Based on his predictions I
predict that he would predict he'd be great at predictions once he has kids of
his own to raise.
Huh. When I was in middle school there was this one
Asian Dude who was head and shoulders above anyone else at Recess Football.
So the point is now when I watch sports I'm like yeah these professional
athletes are all well and good but have they seen this Asian Kid from my class
when I was in sixth-to-eighth grade? I'm guessing not. II
remember once in sixth grade recess we were playing Spin The Bottle and we only
made it 1 Kiss Through before some Adult Overlookers saw us and were like
well this isn't on the level better break up this game immediately.
And the 1 Was Me! I kissed a girl! And I liked it! And this
was even before popular music dictated that's the course of action that we might
go through. Gotta assume that was traumatizing. Hey 1st kiss how
wond... OOP WE GOTTA BREAK THIS UP THIS AIN'T ON THE LEVEL.
Great, just great. Dinner this Dinner'll be
either Chicken Finger + Rice or Salmon Filets + Potatop SemiSpheres.
Chicken and Rice? Sounds like Arroz Con Pollo to me. Not
exactly.! It would be Pollo Con Arroz. It's a different set of
priorities that makes all the difference. But, either way, I'm glad I have
Pollo con Arroz, that's an accurate reflection of my priorities This Go Around.
Only 2 more Basketball Episodes to go. I guess that's good for some
reason. I got any good alternatives for dinner? I guess.
Probably. Not that I can think of as of now. Maybe some
Frozen Dinner or something. I could do that if I felt like it for some
reason! Maybe some PASTA. Probably not but MAYBE some PASTA.
Penultimate Paragraph! More or less! Gonna watch
a HORROR movie when this is over. I wanna get SPOOKED! Then later
today I Can Finish Accomplishing Watching About Basketball but in the mean time
I need some Frights! Also I keep meaning to check if Michael
Jordan's Movie Children are his Real Life Children-- probably not you'd think,
but if you saw the movie, then MAYBE? I REALLY BOUGHT INTO THIS.
... Turns out NOPE THEY WERE JUST ACTORS. Great now you're gonna tell
me that really wasn't Buggs Bunny. I refuse to hear it!
Right? Yeah! Huh. The worst part about eating Soup is if I
don't wanna finish it I have No Real Good Options For Disposing Of Rest.
1)easiest thing is to well just finish it. I know i don't wanna but
just do it anyway! 2)Pour the remaining liquid and SpherePasta into a
sandwich bag, throw that out. 3) Mop up WITH MANY paper towel/napkins the
liquid and throw it out. 4) similarly, but instead of mopping it up, using
FORCE to wipe it up and throw that out. The point is too much liquid,
too much pasta, can't just throw it out, and can't just run it down the sink!
I think I've made my point sufficiently by now.
Last paragraph! 5) no more soup. Lets
hope it doesn't come to that! Finished 3 beers. I will have Beer #4
when this entry is over! Or, at least Start It! I Feel Very Strongly
About This. If I was Michael Jordan I'd name my son Jordan. No
reason not to. Except for how it would sound Really Stupid. But,
besides that, hardly sounds stupid at all! Yes Every Sentence is A
Sentence Closer to being done with this entry that's all well and good but have
you heard the good news about ending STRONGLY? Because I'm sure
it's possible But I'm Just Not There At The Moment I'm Sad To Say. HEY
FIVETHIRTYEIGHT Finally Has A POLL UPDATE FOR TODAY--- GOVERNOR OF UTAH!
AND.... THE REPUBLICAN IS UP BY 32 POINTS... WELL THAT WAS A SNOOZE OF
AN UPDATE. I'll see you guys tomorrow.
August 7, 2020
No I'm Not.
Anyway I'm All Set Up For Entry. I got my coffee. I got my orange
soda. I got my beer. I've got enough cups to contain Each Thing.
Even more, if you count the Beer Can as a cup. Which you are justified to
do! And I'm Talkin not even having to pour it from a glass back into the
can. It's in the can right now! So I can save one of these Other
Cups if I decide to, that's the point I'm trying to make. Anyway, had my
Doctor Appointment last day (yesterday)! She made a regular phone call and
then she was like click this link I texted you to See Me. And I was
like I dunno that seems like a scam. I'll click the link but I DON'T
LIKE IT and also ultimately I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF IT DOESN'T WORK.
And it didn't! Boy was her face red! I have no way of knowing.
I bet I wish I had succeeded with that link Now! Also if
Trump wants to 100% redeem himself after Presidency, a perfect title for his
autobiography is BOY IS MY FACE RED.
Hits all the bases, that's the only point I'm trying to
make. Really more of an Orange. Oh well you take what puns
you can get, not always gonna be 100%. However there is one NEGATIVE
component where he spend several chapters berating the Team Formerly Known As
The Washington Redskins and is Anti-that change and makes interesting academic
points with the word Red. Anyway I've been watching The Last Dance:
The Basketball Documentary, and its pretty good! Also, I was thinking
about it, and I think there are two things where American Exceptionalism is
actually justified-- Professional Sports and Professional Entertainment.
Mostly the sports, though, that was my original thought, just the sports.
And you wanna talk about why we're great? Because We Have Diversity and
Minority Populations! Let's face it American Sportsmen are
disproportionately African American and/or Latino, and/or I dunno Some OTHER
thing. So, yeah! Also America is Best At Culture because That's The
Kind Of Culture I'm Used To!
Do I kinda wanna get into Basketball? YES! Will
I? PROBABLY NOT RIGHT NOW! Will I later? MAYBE JUST NOT AT
THIS EXACT MOMENT. American Eggseptinoalism. Hey we also have
the best Fast Food Franchises. The top ones are probably around 80%
American based! THAT'LL LEARN THE REST OF THE COUNTRIES WE'LL MALNUTRITION
THEM GOOD. The good news is (Bad News?) I've been going with No Breakfast
more often than Some Breakfast. It's good because I Save 300 calories or
so every day but It's Bad because presumably I make that up by eating more later
in the day. Also it's good because I'm like yea no breakfast guess I
can eat as early a lunch as I want that's Just Math. But it's
bad because breakfast is good for you c'mon everyone knows that. So
I either have to use all those inputs to decide whether to eat breakfast or
not-- or I can just wing it each morning! I'll wing it! Thank you
Cool. Also I get that The Best Athletes (And Culture
Media People) come to America cause that's where the top opportunities are.
But, still, I think American Born people are disproportionably Great At Sports.
Or Website Writing, for instance. Is there some guy in India just Doing
This Exact Thing But in Sanskrit. Do they even use Sanskrit in India.
My guess is A Small Minority Does. Lotta people there, gotta be some
Sanskrit Loves. LMLTURQ. Hmm Sanskrit WAS India Based but it's
An Ancient Language. That'd be like I Wonder If Someone In Italy Is
Writing This In LATIN. In which case hey I'd like to meet these
counterparts maybe we can combine forces and I Dunno Do Somethin Or Something I
Haven't Thought All The Deatils Out.
Internet seems to be okay with it, but Microsoft
FrontPage does not accept exceptionalism as a word. So basically
Americans are the best (or worst?) at making up words. They EXCEL at
making up words but it's a BAD thing to do. That's the point I've been
trying to make all of the entry so far. Anyway had only THREE BEERS
yesterday. Now I'm left with One More Beer than if I had FOUR BEERS.
I crunched the numbers and everything! Gotta keep my door open this
Earl' Afternoon, expecting a delivery. Whatta scam or somethin, I
dunno, I don't have all the answers. I think if the NBA was smart, and
they really wanted to win me over, they'd send me a free Play Station with All
Teh Basketball Games. That'd seal the deal, I'd definitely for sure get
into Basketball then! The BALLS IN YOUR COURT oh man I never realized
what that meant until Just Now! It's a basketball thing! And maybe
tennis. Possibly a third thing, too.
Also just having the ball in our court doesn't give us
any kind of clear advantage. Just imagine two basketball teams standing
around in a court. Suddenly a ball materializes out of thin air.
Suddenly there's a ball in both team's court! No advantage at
all, this could be anyone's game! Also it doesn't really mean
advantage, it just means your move. Your time to go do stuff.
Still though I am Against The Logistics Of How This Metaphor Works.
The point is Of Course I Identify With Michael Jordan I Have The Same First Name
As Him. Yep all seems to add up, same name, same level of complete
dominance at anything we choose to do. Also Michael Jordan was a fine
actor and a charming screen presence in Space Jam! Not Everyone Could Pull
Anyway, I dunno. Last paragraph for this section.
Also he's probably better at baseball than me. PROBABLY. He
should send me a play station with All The Baseball Games if he really wanted to
test his mettle. I think its great when you're In Basketball and 6'6
is Too Short. Real Great. HEY I just had a great idea-- MINI
BASKETBALL. Just keep Everything The Same, but smaller! Ball
Smaller, Net Smaller, Court Smaller, EVERYTHING IS THE SAME BUT SMALLER.
HOLY SHIT I COULD ACTUALLY PLAY BASKETBALL and there's no reason this
cant be actualized! SEND ME ALL THE PLACATIONS SO I COULD WORK ON THIS
CONCEPT. Also make it Just Big Enough where I have the absolute best
advantage at my precise height specifically. Only Fair Way To Do It!
Alright one more paragraph for this section. It's just
like Boxing with Weight Classes. Basketball with Height Classes. Why not!
Makes sense! Actually the equivalent would be Everything Is The Same
But You Just Play With Uniformly Smaller People. But that's no fun.
I can only try to imagine what'd it be like to palm a basketball. I
NEED SMALLER BASKETBALLS STAT. I dunno. Hey, last paragraph
of this section. Three or four beers today. That's my best guess.
You can do ANY sport Where Everything Is Proportionally The Same But Everything
Is Smaller. Basketball is the easiest way to do it, though, I think, I
guess, I dunno! Anyway. I'd play some mini-baseball. No
mini-hockey though. It JUST RUBS ME THE WRONG WAY.
Mini-football, that's great, I'd definitely play some Mini-football.
Alright I'll be back in a bit.
No it isn't.
Hmm How's Barry Sanders doing in The Democratic Primary. He WHAT?
ITS OVER? I dunno that doesn't sound right. I'm gonna have
to look into that one is the point. I just figurd out a great scam for
Biden to pick a white man. Just have them Come Out as a Black Woman.
WOKE PEOPLE WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. Also I don't think it's right to
Come Out as someone of a different race. Maybe It Is Okay? I dunno.
I'm gonna have to look into that one. But still, even if Tim Kaine
came out as a black woman, he has no tangible connection to the African American
(Female) Community. He might consider himself one, but as far as I know,
he hasn't cultivated belonging to that community as a whole explicitly.
Maybe he has, I dunno what Tim Kaine does in his Spare Time! I don't even
know what he does in his Regular Time! Practice The Harmonica a lot,
that's about all I know!
Definitely feels like a Four Beer Day. If I don't drink
all my beer for the week really quickly, I'm gonna be drinking Every Day.
That's unhealthy! If I drink 9 beers twice in a row, suddenly I'm only
drinking 2 days out of the week! That's a lot more normal for someone
Quarantined With Himself And No One Else. Lunch today look like some BBQ
Salmon and some Potato Spheres. Also I've known for weeks that They aren't
Quite Potato Spheres but I keep referring to them as Potato Spheres here.
They're Potato Spheres Cut In Half. And also not a full on sphere.
Not perfectly 360 degrees at all 3-dimensional radii. Ya know, more like a
horizontal Round thing than an actual sphere. And then imagine that cut in
half. That's what they are.
Whew glad we got that covered. Had some Super
Market Corned Beef last night and It Was Great! Of course I Identify with
Corned Beef more than The Other Deli Meats It's Part Of My Name! I am
enjoying Basketball: The Last Dance very much, but I think I'm gonna take a
Movie Break after this entry. I dunon what movie! I've got many to
choose from! Easily DOZENS of movies across 6 different
platform-streamer-sights. The good news is Today I Drank All The Coffee I
Set Out To Drink. Last week or two, more often than not, I'm not finishing
that Six Cup Of Coffee I arranged with my coffee maker. Today I knocked
all those cups out of the park! WHich is a Sprots Reference. You
play in parks and you throw balls out of the park and that's how you win at
Ugh. Barry Sanders was good at basketball.
Trump says to African Americans, what do you have to lose. Alright
Now That We're Caught Up On My Inner Mindset On How I Got There, I can make the
joke which that leads to-- Trump goes, "What do you have to lose," that
reminds me of Javier Bardem in No Country For Old Men. "Flip the coin.
What do you have to lose," and then black people are like, "Well I
Need TO Know What I'm Calling For," and Trump is like, "everything,"
and then black people are like If I'm calling for something I need to know
for what. Yeah that rant seems to check out I'm Okay With that,
"Joke." Anyway, jeez, I'm gettin' through this Entry like It Was Nothin.
Hmm turns out It Is Nothing. Well that would explain that pretty well.
What else is going on. Jeez. Dem runnin in
Texas, 'if you didn't want higher taxes, ya shouldn't have called your state
Tax-Us!' Not proud of that. Not proud of that one at all!
But I am proud of myself for Trying. Never learn if you never try!
Also you should be able to have Basketball Sized People be jockeys and just
breed a race of Ultra Horses that are Way Too Big. I'm talkin' Waaay Too
Big Equinoxes These horses are so big they will challenge us as the dominant
Apex Predator of Earth. These horses are so big (And Smart!) that we'll
regret the day we set their inevitable assertion as Top Dog On Earth into place.
Hmm. Wonder what this paragraph was all about. Led to the next, last
paragraph of the section.
Jeez. Lunch'll be After Entry, that's my best
guess. It all depends though! On what I dunno. I don't think I
ever realized Dennis Rodman was Good. I don't think I ever realized a lot
of things in basketball! Basket Your Balls, paid for by Underwear.
God Damn Big Underwear and their puns! I'm really proud of myself
because I know the Life Hack of how to throw a decent First Pitch in baseball.
Overthrow it! Aim as if you're throwing it 2x as far! Alright now
all I need to do is to become a Celebrated Public Figure. NOw we play the
waiting game. Eventually the Invite'll come. And then MAN OH MAN I
WILL MAKE A PITCH THAT IS RELATIVELY RESPECTABLE. It's called
PLAYING THE LONG GAME. Yeesh.
a Good Idea
No I don't.
Anyway, was just thinkin' about Potato Spheres, and I then was thinking about
how I Know that the universe is an approximate Sphere. Because I
have it on good authority from Modest Mouse that, "The universe is shaped
exactly like the Earth." And if that was scientifically inaccurate no way
the NAACP would allow that record to come out. Lots of things wrong
with that riff. Or maybe lots of things RIGHT. YOU JUST DON'T
WANNA HEAR IT. That's on you! Here's a thought-- Joe
Biden can pick Mike Pence as his running mate. It's called
TRIANGULATION haven' you learned anything about politics from James Carville?
And Mike Pence is like Well I win either way I'm laughing all the way to the
bank! Also I think there's something missing from political discourse
that we don't know Mike Pence's Secret Shame. We know it's funny that he's
a Dumb Religious Nut. But I'll wager dollars to donuts that there's some
Secret Shame behind those odds. Maybe it's as benign as He Takes Bribes or
Something. Financial Secret Shame. Maybe it's something else.
But This Guy Is Guilty of SOMETHING just look at him!
HE'S THE MICHAEL JORDAN OF DUMB VICE PRESIDENTS... of the
last 30 years. yep that seems to check out. This has been a
good entry because I'm Constantly On My Toes waiting to see if Delivery Arrives.
Can't just settle in I GOTTA LISTEN CLOSELY. And that worked to my
advantage it turns out. The point so far has been Give Me A PlayStation
and I'll come around on ya. It's very low stakes kickbacks.
Also I need a TV. Can't hook a Play Station up to NOTHING. And also
some games. Gotta give me appropriate games! Also if you can somehow
get me an NFL Blitz that's just perfect you got me in your corner FOREVER with
an NFL Blitz. Andy Blitz. Former writer and performer on
Conan O Brian Goes To New York. Well, that settles that! He was
one of the Slip Nutz. Well, that settles that! Play
Uhghhgh. Three or more paragraphs left. Also
was just looking in the mirror for my daily reminder that... DSUOICANET...
!Skcor? Oh I get it. I'm gonna take a what will I
watch when this is over break. Just to survey my options. Hmm
I can watch, "House Of Wax: The Paris Hilton Vehicle. I feel like I've
seen that before. I might just be thinking of Pornography: The Paris
Hilton Vehicle. House of Wax that's what I call my ears lol gottem.
Texas is all well and good but I'm more like TEXMEX US I want some of that
cuisine please. Right? Maybe some Chili Tacos. Perhaps a
Quesadilla I'll Settle For. Quesadillas are FINE but I've never been like
This One Thing Burrito Or Taco Is Fine BUT I NEED 400% MORE CHEESE.
Maybe I was like that FOUR, SIX TIMES TOPS.
Yeah! I can't wait to find out why Michael
Jordan is a Jerk. I remember reading Analysis of this Documentary Series
and it being like, Michael Jordan Got Problems and I forget why but I
THINK it's that he's too much focused on winning! C'mon clearly you've
never professional sport like Me and Michael. Winning is all there is!
Maybe he wants it even Too Much I haven't gotten up to that yet but THAT'S HOW
YOU ARE GOOD AT SPORTS! C'mon! I like how Michael Jordan's number is
23. In Blink-182, 23 is the age where the narrator forget
what their age is. What's my age again, what's my age again, nobody
likes you when you're 23, that must be my age, it was in my head for some
reason. That's how music goes YOU GOTTA PLAY TO WIN.
Yeah! Never saw anyone ask them what's the
deal with the 182. Because I'd be interested in that. I've GOT
MY OWN THEORIES but that's all they are, just guesses! Ugh.
In regards to the entire name, I always thought that it's like, One Day
You're NOT 182, then Blink, suddenly you're 182! That's how fast
time flies. But we still need to find out why 182.
TENACIOUS D, 'SKCOR'S?' THAT'S LIKE AN OXY MORON! Tenacious D is
defense. Scoring is offense! Well great glad we got that
addressed. I dunno. Hey it's already the 19th paragraph.
One more and we're a clean 20! Been a while since I reached that amount of
paragraphs is my feeling! But first, we gotta finish This Paragraph.. ...
.. Alright that should about cover it!
Anyway. I bet I can binge watch Tenacious D: The HBO
show. And, if I can, I can knock those out in One Day. Only, what, 6
episodes? 8? 4? Those are my first guesses In Order.
It's funny because music is Defense. Comedy is offense. That's where
My Head Is At These (to)Days. YOURE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS BIDEN WAS UP
IN TEXAS TO THE POINT HE WAS a 40% FAVORITE TO WIN THE STAT AND IS NOW BACK DOWN
TO 37% BUT THAT'S STILL PRETTY GOOD. Also if only Biden was able
to pick Beto O Rourke as VP that'd be Fuckin' Overkill in terms of his Electoral
College Projections. And he could excite young people because he is one!
Oh well can't go back now... unless Beto wants to come out as a black
woman... if anyone can do it it's him!... I'm not gonna count on that
but ITS THERE IF THEY WANT IT.
Alright 1 more paragraph. One can only imagine all the
Ribbing from conservatives, BETA o Rourke. That'll show him!
Whose presumably a real Alpha Male Jerk because that's what
Politician Douche Bags are like in general in real life is my impression.
Oh well, if we didn't want our leaders to be douche bags we should have formed a
different kind of government! I mean, c'mon. Donald Trump.
What is He If Not The BIGGEST DOUCHE BAG IN THE WORLD. Not much.
I like swing states like Arizona because its like LOL DUMB ARIZONA NOT EVEN
AS MUCH ELECTORAL COLLEGE PEOPLE AS OTHER SWING STATES HAHA THEY CALL THEMSELVES
A SWING STATE WELL NOBODY CARES THIS SPECIFIC ELECTION THIS TIME AROUND GOTTEMM.
Okay. One more paragraph! Then that's it, for
real! Figure I can finish Basketball: The Dance today, whether I go right
to it or pick up with it later on. Then its on to Something Else I Guess I
Dunno Don't Have All The Details. Also I remembr seeing Tenacious D was
gonna release a limited edition animated show in 2016 or 2017 but that never
showed up! Except for how I went to their live show! And they showed
it in completion! But I never saw that released outside of their live
show! So I got the inside scoop! Basically it was good
post apocolpgyici or something and teancious do has people? guess and its
anmianted with sumci songs. I can't leave you there with the
entry. What kind of Entrywriter would I be if I left you there! A
NOT GREAT ONE is the point. One more paragraph!
Yuch. The point is Everything Is Sports. You
can be good or bad at sports. And you can be good or bad at Anything And
Everything. So basically, Just Like In Sports, its good to be good. That's
why Michael Jordan is so inspiring. Because his name is Michael.
Michael is the most common Boy's Name year After year. That's why He Chose
It. Wanted to inspire as many people as possible. Also I dunno entry
is almost over. Michael Jackson was the Michael Jordan of music until he became
the Dennis Rodman of music until he ultimately became the Pedophile Rapist of
music. So the point is Michaels are at the top of their fields!
I guess. Another entry in the books! I'll see you guys later.
August 6, 2020
Anyway, lets get
right into it-- I'm pretty sure I can win a Three Card Monte game. I can
beat it!! I can! I HAVE A SYSTEM! Cause for some of them, they
won't cheat you the first Go-Around. They let you get comfortable and then
they take All Your Money. So basically ALL YA GOTTA DO is give them the
impression Somehow that you will be interested in playing multiple games and
that it A Definite for them! They're thinking this can be Catching A Whale, and
Not Some MINI... Aquatic... Mammal... so the point is you play once, you win,
you go Pleasure doing business with you! A dolphin. I don't
think it's fair for Ocean to have Mammals. Land doesn't have any Fish?
Seems like inequity if I know anything about words I don't know very well.
So, great. Unpacked, wiped down, put away ALL of
Supermarket Delivery. We're not just talkin Fridge Stuff. Not just
talkin Fridge and Freezer stuff. EVERYTHING! And I will have first beer in
~60 hours in real soon. I don't think enough attention is given to Two and
A Half Days being Exactly 60 hours. 60 is a key number in time.
Seconds, Minutes... Now the next logical thing is 60 hours-- Exactly 2.5 Days.
I feel this information can be used practically in several ways that I'm not
100% on yet as of now. Just panicked and was like Wait is
2.5 days REALLY 60 hours? I'm almost Definitely Sure.
24+24=48, everyone konw that. 1/2 24=12. I'M VERY SURE AT THIS
POINT. 48+12. SIXTY. LEMME GO BACK TO THE START I NEED TO
TRIPLE CHECK THIS! It's too important to not get it right.
Sure that's half a paragraph. And the first half
was nonsense, too! Great, just great. I have a Doctor Phone
Appointment this late afternoon. I think she wants to, "FaceTime," Me
which I've never done before and don't particularly want to do now. I
dunno what we get out of it. I'm Relatively Sure that she's not gonna take
one look at my face and be like YECHCHH YOU GOTTA GET THAT CHECKED OUT
IMMEDIATELY. Maybe, I dunno. I guess that's the kind of
service I'm paying for. I was watching My Strange Addiction and there's
one lady whose addicted to psychics. She talks to different ones ten times
every day. That she cycles through. I gotta imagine that'll just
devolve into the physics talking shit about the other psychics. Cause She
Has No Other Life. So all she can do is be like Hey what do you think
about these other 9 psychics? One by one, lets go. Mmhmm. Oh,
mm, mhmm. WELL LET ME STOP YOU THERE BECAUSE THEY'VE BEEN TELLING ME
SOME THINGS ABOUT YOU, TOO...
What a world. I dunno. Once Quarantine is
over, my First Move is finding out a way to Retrieve HardDrive from 2000's
computer. And then find a way to Retrieve It All The Way to being able to
access it from My Current Computer. 1) Lyrics, guitar practiceings, and
full complete songs I made that I lost. 2) Porn! LOTS AND LOTS OF
PORN. My trick was creating a folder called POTemp. Cause
that's the name of a lot of folders. XXXTemp (hmm should have used
different letters this is literally THE ONLY COMBINATION OF THREE LETTERS that
would imply pornogrpahy). So no one would think to check out POTemp!
Also the, "PO," is short for porn. So that I don't forget!
Hey let's start some beer. Knowing I have
appointment with Doctor @3:45, that's gonna impact my consumption of beer!
I can, "Dig," that! Oh Hey GreaT News I had A BITE of a Buffalo Chicken
Finger and I was like FANTASTIC! So that's lunch is the point.
Lunch all over the place. Mostly my room and my kitchen. It was
constructed and cooked in kitchen. Consumed in my room PRESUMABLY.
Anyway, Sixty Hours of Beer On The Wall, Sixty Hours of Beer!
That Accomplishes Nothing. I think the Electoral College is preserved
by Big Polling. If everything was condensed into a Popular Vote SUDDENLY
WE DON'T NEED 50 Different Polls every day! Not sure if that
accomplished anything, either. I'm gonna guess NOPE.
Alright First Sip Of Beer LETS GO. Hey sixth paragraph
of the first section. I'm Operating At ABOVE Capacity. Not sure
if that analogy (metaphor, etc?) is being used accurately. I think
Not. Operating at ABOVE Capacity is risky. You're in danger!
However, also, Operating at ABOVE Capacity is GREAT! You're doing better
than you thought you could! And you Presumably Are Still Operating!
So you're firing on all cylinders which I believe is a Mechanics Reference
(Metaphor, etc?). I dunno. What titles do I got going this entry.
I don't remember specifically but I do remember being under whelmed by them, but
what's to be done, I don't wanna have to think of GOOD titles. Anyway I'm
gonna write a 7th paragraph of this.
I'm starting to think about When Am I Projecting
Quarantine to end. I mean if I had to guess I would guess It Will End.
But I dunno! If only WE JUST ADDRESS THE WAY WE KNOW HOW AND WHAT WORKS
then we can ALL be back in action in 6-8 weeks. But nah lets just do
nothing and IT NEVER FUCKIN' ENDS! WHAT KIND OF DUMB STUPID MOTHER FUCKER
PEOPLE WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE. I'm using my Bully
Pulpit to be PRO-ending Pandemic and thus being Able To End Quarantine
Responsibly. You don't see enough of those takes in the media or from
politicians. Yes I'm sure SOME people in the media and SOME politicians
are anti-Pandemic-Winning but their voices are not being heard! I'll be
back in a little bit.
Good Thing I'm Here
Negative thing from SuperMarket Delivery is that my Parents weren't interested
in any communal dinners! No MeatLoaf. No Roasted Chicken. No
some other thing we never even got once! Yes we have spaghetti and
rigatoni and elbow macaroni and fettuccine so one of those might happen at some
point. We Also Have Frozen Meatballs! So that's like eating Meatloaf
but Balls Instead of Loafs. Which I believe is a Gender thing. Men
have Balls, Women have Loafs. Yep seems to check out based on my
understanding of anatomy. When we were talking about Pasta
Dinner a few days ago, I was like hey we can have the spaghetti and
meatballs! And my Mom was like Your Dad said he wasn't interested
in meatballs... so I had an idea to cut it up and put it in the sauce!
And I was like Yeah I think he'd notice that! Maybe I give my Dad
too much credit! Or maybe my Mom doesn't give my Dad enough credit!
Or maybe this story was partly fabricated! And the dialogue was the same
but it wasn't implied that My Dad wouldn't notice The Chopped Up Meat, and that
He Would Realize but just that he'd be okay with it!
That last one sounds pretty plausible. A story that
will last a life time. Anyway National Polls are all well and fine but
have you heard the good news about Battle Ground State Polls? Man oh man
is that a rush. I crave that excitement! And it's good because
America Population, I'm like, sure I can imagine people deserting Biden to
Trump, lotta fools in America. But then, even in a True Swing State,
I'm like Yeah I think the good folks of PENNSYLVANIA are smart enough to
stick with Biden. I see the best in people, what can I say!
Well, I see the best in people from Pennsylvania. FOR NOW. But I see
the worst in people in Generic Red State America. Anyway. I've been
wearing my Tenacious D Rocks! shirt for roughly the past week. It's
important my family is constantly reminded that Tenacious D rocks! Also
relatively big t-shirt that doesn't conform to my belly.
Also I guess what else. Got some Spanish Rice
leftover from last week that I will finish with Buffalo Chicken Fingers.
Spanish Rice is when you give a girl Chicken and Lamb over rice and its a
daterape drug. From the rice. Spanish Rice. Chicken and Lamb
is delicious, though. Halal food is inherently an aphrodisiac so I
think you're messing up going the extra (Illegal?) mile. I don't
get the idea of Date Rape. I think a lot of Date Rape is probably just
Wealthy White Guy Raped Someone After Being Seen In A Setting Other People Were
Aware Of. Like in Sublime's, "The Date Rape Song." You see
someone at a bar, you go on to rape them through Drugs, THAT WAS NO DATE THAT
WAS JUST A CHANCE ENCOUNTER. Also even if it was a date does that
matter? MINSICULALLY YES. It doesn't make it Better AT
ALL, it just makes it different! Let's tally it up in different columns,
that's all I'm saying. Just As EVIL and Consequences are EQUAL.
Let's just keep track differently FOR FUN.
Anyway. I figure it's a nice Rest Of The Day after
Phone Call Appointment. Maybe I can be like Oh Hello My Face Isn't
Working better just talk over the phone! Anyway, I dunno. YOU
WANNA TALK ABOUT FACES WORKING? i JUST SHAVED MOST OF MY FACE!
We're talkin' everything but 2/3rds of Sideburns. I got TIRED.
Episode of Simpsons where Smithers gets involved in another elderly rich man and
its his Side Burns. I feel like that MUST have been an episode
at some point in the last 15 years. I kinda remember seeing it. But,
if not, It's Prime Simpsons Real Estate! There if you want it!
I'm pretty sure there's been an episode with that but Minus The Sexual Aspect.
Well what's the point that's what makes it funny.
Yeah! Is it okay to Micro-Dosing Slip Spanish Fly
and JUST HAVE A GOOD TIME? Nope still sounds a little bit too much like
Rape to me. Well ya got me there! I'd never use a Spanish Fly
Type Product unless its on myself and JUST TO HAVE A GOOD TIME. Hey
just finished Beer #1. Probably either 3 or 4 Overall for today!
I feel comfortable making that prediction. There's no negative
consequences if I'm wrong. Whose gonna stop me from making predictions
when there's nothing at stake! No one, that's why! Anyway time for
another break from entry. I'll read All The Twitters and then regroup back
here in a jiffy!
Going On Again
Well here we are
with Part III of III of Entry and It's ALL Been Done Facing South.
That's the standard since Computer Replaced My TV. COMPUTERS WILL NOT
REPLACE US lol thats right i went there. Ugh. Alright, rest of
entry will be good, starting... now. Well here we are with Part III
of III of Entry and It's ALL Been Done before. I got some answers on why
Family doesn't want Communal Dinners. Because they invariably are better
from Oven and not Microwave. And while Air Conditioning is out of whack,
they just don't feel comfortable using the oven that much! If only WWII
Concentration Camps had Unworking Air Conditioning. The point is
they'd figure out a way to use Jewish Bodies to power their air conditioning?
They're a Clever Sort! Oh, right. Air Conditioning Will Not Replace
The question at this point is Eat Lunch Before Doctor or
After. After Doctor man that's a late lunch! But it provides a good
benchmark to inspire myself to put off lunch for some reason no one is really
sure of. #LeprechaunSummerForTheAges continues later today as I begin
Leprechaun IV: I Forget Which Leprechaun This Was But I'll Look Up On Wikipedia
Which One Comes Next. The point is Warwick Davis doesn't get enough
attention (and ADMIRATION) for creating and inhabiting a classic 1990's Horror
Movie Villain! I've seen this guy Playing Himself and Him Being a
Leprechaun and Him Being Himself are WAY different! But the point is if
anyone Has To Be an Evil Leprechaun I'm glad it was Warwick Davis!
That's the only point I'm trying to make this entry!
Cool! Certainly looks like I'll be eating chicken
fingers AFTER appt with doctor. That way I am thinner for an extra 1.5
hours (90 minutes-- I KNOW the math is right on this!). I always like
those stories when you get McNuggets that are Rats or something. Or the
skull of a squirrel. Something like that. I like it because Hmm I
could go for some McNuggets right about now. Oh. Right.
I have chicken fingers set up for lunch. WELL THAT SOLVES THAT PROBLEM!
Great, just great. Also, the Rocks in Tenacious D Rocks is
underlined-- so you know they mean business. Anyway have there been any
hard hitting interviews with Tenacious D that are like well look if you had
to pick whether its comedy or music, what would Tenacious D be? And
they're like, without batting an eye, music, definitely music! and then
the interviewer is like hmm thought that was a real good, "Gotcha," question.
Oh well. I'll see you guys later.
Yeah! I've had ZERO soda all day. Except for
maybe the morning. When I first woke up. But since then NO SODA @
all. The point was that was supposed to inspire me to get some soda.
But so far I'm stuck here in front of my computer. Man oh man if I
could hook up Old Hard Drive. And not even for the porn. Maybe
only like TWENTY PERCENT for the porn. And even that isn't 100% For
Masturbating as much as For Nostalgia. But man I've got some real great
nostalgia Guitarring presumably that'd be my guess. I'ma get that soda
now. If I was writing Literally Anything Else, there'd be no room for
me to say ALRIGHT IM GONNA GET SOME SODA NOW BRB. ALRIGHT NOW I'M BACK
WHERE WAS I. Only here is that kind of.. it's not even stupidity...
Lack of RESPECT for the audience, tolerated! Even if I'm The Only
Audience! It's A Lack of Respect For Myself! Like when I had to Date
Rape Myself! Because I Don't Respect Myself Enough?!!! That may
or may not add up mathematically.
Last paragraph presumably. MAN OH MAN TRUMP GOT HIS
BUTT KICKED IN THE PRESIDENTIAL APPROVAL RATING THAT WAS UPLOADED TO 538 TWO
MINUTES AGO. WAY WORSE THAN THE ONES UPLOADED To 538 TWO HOURS AGO.
This guy is just about ready to be Finished. What's Joe Biden's finishing
move. Piledriver? I'll have to look into that one.
Cycled through My Strangle Addictions now am back to some
Interventions. Which Presumably Should Be Replaced By Jews WAIT NO
Replaced By Actual Entertainment that's not dumb reality show B.S.
AnywAnyway presumably got about an hour to kill until DOctor's Appointement.
Then Beer # 3 (of 3 or 4!) and then Hey Enjoy The Rest Of The Day With Some REAL
Entertainment! Sounds good to me! I'll see ya tomorrow.
August 5, 2020
Tell You Something
It be accurate? I dunno, who
cares. I was just having an academic political discussion with Father and
I was telling him about how Joe Biden always refers to, "Obama and 'Me." when it
should clearly be Obama and, "I." I'm an INTELLECTUAL I NOTICE THESE
THINGS and I'm pretty sure Joe Biden is Smart Enough to know he's wrong but Dumb
Enough to be like WELL I SET OUT TO BE A MAN OF THE PEOPLE AND THE PEOPLE
HATE GRAMMAR SO I'M GETTING ON THE GRAMMAR IS BAD TRAIN. In case
you're worried Trump won't have a lasting legacy Even Among Democrats.
Anti-Intellectualism and Courting Dumb People To a Dumb Extent is now
bipartisan! Maybe it's always been that way and Now Just More. I
dunno maybe Biden is Dumb! I Hope Not! I'd rather him be a Smart
INTELLECTIVELY SELL OUT than a Dumb DUMB GUY.
Also is Biden and Me good politics? I Dunno!
Whoops I meant Obama and Me. Well, it's 12 years later!
Obama and Me is dunzo! Now it's all Biden and I!!! GET IT
STRAIGHT. There's no, "I," in Biden. Yes there is it's
right there! Second letter! See? Yep seems to check
out! There was that Nickelodeon Show My Brother My Brother And Me.
Which Biden might be Channeling for his campaign adds 27 years later. Just
googled, Fruedian Slip?, My Brother My Birther And Me. That's the
sitcom abuot General Election Campaign. My Brother, My Birther, And Me!
Biden's My Brother. Trump is My Birther. Me is ME I GUESS?
Or Maybe Just All Of Us. THE COLLECTIVE, "ME." I'm
using The "Royal, 'Me." Also Yes That Show With That Title Does
Seem To Check Out.
The point is it turns out Biden is just an older brother who
is 45 years older than me. It can happen! Anyway Halfway
Through being without beer compared to Yesterday Entry. I'll get beer if
it kills me! Well if I knew in advance It Will Kill Me I probably
wouldn't get it. But that's a 1 in a million scenario. Since
getting her Her Precious Cigarettes, My Mom is a lot more Understanding about me
drinking. She's able to have kind understanding discussions trying to get
me to Get Less Beer without being OVERTLY angry. So I consider that a win.
And all I ahd to do was give my elderly mother with emphysema 260 cigarettes!
With the promise of getting her another 200 cigarettes every 10 days, 2
weeks? I Dunno! I knew there was a way to get in her good graces.
Wow! MY FAVORITE POLL PREDICTION WEBSITE HAS BEEN QUIET
FOR 2 OR 3 Days. It's The ECONOMIST projection! Anyway.
I think that's probably an element to General Election that I hadn't recognized.
Probably that Biden is probably leaning into, specifically among African
Americans. Defending Obama, not just his legacy, but the man, against this
Racist Birther Guy. Which is less offensive than Obama and Me but
MORE offensive than... uhh.. I dunno I don't find it offensive.
That settles that. Anyway I made ZERO coffee today because I had TWO CUPS
left over from last day (some call it Yesterday?) and I'm having ONE right now
and will have a SECOND one later. Also half of the first cup WAS ALREADY
POURED but sitting in my room at room temperature than I FILLED IT UP with
leftover coffee from pot and together that makes ONE CUP of coffee.
Hey I get to take a break after this paragraph. That's
always fun! Fun is a strong word. That's Always Tolerable!
Tolerable is a strong word. I Can Always Get Through It! Yep that
one checks out SO FAR. Trying out something new from Fresh Direct
BUFFALO CHICKEN FINGERS. I assume its chicken fingers which taste like
BUFFALO sauce. Prove me wrong! They May Indeed Yet Prove Me
Wrong. That's for THE CHICKEN FINGERS to decide. Men can have
kids when they're 20. Then again when the're 65. For women that's a
stretch. I'm sure In History it happens here and there, but I wouldn't
bank on it! So the point is Biden is more like a HALF Brother. Or a
STEP Brother if you will!! Obama was a half brother lol ya feel me.
INSENSITIVE. NOT ON MY WEBSITE I DON'T TOLERATE THAT.
Anyway one more paragraph for this section. I won't
end on Insenstive Notes! I will use them as Motivation To Write Extra
Paragraphs so our in-poor-taste jokes are Completely Forgotten. I don't
think it was that bad a joke. Wait, no. ME DON'T THINK IT WAS
THAT BAD A JOKE. Alright now we've got The Average American Joe
Public on board. Not a bad campaign slogan. Average American Joe.
Because it speaks to how People From All Wings, Backgrounds, Places, Ideologies,
etc see Joe Biden. 'AVERAGE AMERICAN' JOE. I dunno now that I
think about it maybe he IS BETTER than the average American.
Slightly ABOVE AVERAGE AMERICAN JOE. OH NO NOW THEY CAN RUN
POPULIST CAMPAIGN AGAINST HIM. Whatta world, whatta world.
Forget What I Was Going To Say
I could only imagine what it might have been!
I dunno, who cares.
The point is if Biden wins History Will Forever Remember Obama and Biden as The
Dream Team. Inexorably Linked, that's just facts! Just Facts!
And Trump will be down in history as Wait Whaaaaaaat? American People
had THAT reaction to a politically moderate black president? Man, jeez!
So we got that to look forward to in Future History. Hopefully.
Based on what happens in November, Solid 4 out of 5 chance we probably have that
to look forward to! Maybe it'll be just People had THAT reaction to
a politically moderate... President? Are Future People Truly
Colorblind when it comes to Past Presidents? I dunno! That would be
fine, I guess! That's up to Future Black People to decide! Not
present day Me.
Got some pizza to finish for lunch today. We're talking
Pizza! Lunch! Today! Yep that all seems to check out.
Hmm looks like The Mets are only 4 and 8 this season. Yep doesn't seem to
count. Anyway. I think I'd feel the same way as if they were 8-4--
but it seems like Spring Training Standings. That's my instinctual way to
process this season. Ahh even it they were 8-4, that's nice, doesn't
MEAN anything, but I guess They're Just Getting Ready For The Next Real Season.
Presumably. Maybe now Baseball Is Completely Entirely Ruined and I will
never be invested in Baseball again. Yep that seems to check out.
I will resume CONSIDERING taking Baseball seriously in, lets say, 5 years.
When all this UNPLEASANTNESS is but a distinct memory.
Cool! Air conditioning isn't fixed. It can't be
fixed. We're gonna have to spend Mid 4 digits replacing it! WHAT THE
HELL THAT'S TOO MUCH MONEY. I DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY OF THAT.
I got maybe mid 2 digits of dollars in my Coin Collection. It's not a
valuable coin collection. It's just a collection of modern day pennies,
dimes, NICKELS, and.... there's a fourth thing.. oh right A FOURTH-- Quarter!
But that's really more of MY PARENTS coin collection. I accumulated
it from spending Their Money. Damnit I was gonna leave this to my grand
kids. OH well such is life. Gotta make Digiorno, It's
Delivery, Wait, No It Isn't in microwave, like a chump! On the other
hand I did get my Digiorno Delivered To Me by Supermarket. So basically
their campaign promise is a lie. I can sue them, I think. I've got a
pretty strong case! It WAS DELIVERY ITS DIGIORNO. THIS
HAS CAUSED ME PSYCHOLOGICAL, ETC. DAMAGE I WANT MID 7 DIGITS IN MONEY.
Anyway, I was standing around in the kitchen earlier and I
was like wait a second, my Gut is sticking out way too much! I can't
see it cause I'm wearing a shirt, and instinctually holding in my gut all the
time, but I CAN JUST FEEL IT PROTRUDING. Oh well such is life.
Also by Gut I mean Fat. Not some Real Gut. Is Gut=Stomach.
Or is it just Any Organ. Blood and Guts. LMLTURQ... before
that, Hey that's another Nickelodeon show from 27 years ago. Guts! The
American Gladiators: Twelve Year Old Edition Show. Anyway, right
LMLTURQ! Hmm gut is ALL of the Gastroextrateriestrial Track. So
it was halfway. It is multiple organs but all relating to Gastronomy.
Cool! Hey, great, what else do I got going on.
Halfway Through Leprechaun Three: Fiddle Dee Tee! Leprechaun is
always making terrible rhymes. I thought I'd get in the spirit. Joe
Biden's gotta be of Irish ancestry, right? LMLTURQ. YEP OVER 50%
IRISH. So the point is was Biden really born in this country?
My guess is Yes. Maybe they should revive the anti-Catholic sentiment
they used against Kennedy. Is he controlled by the Pope? Maybe.
Gotta be controlled by someone. Anyway, hey, by the next paragraph,
I'm gonna be eating some ITS PIZZA, ITS DIGIORNO, C'MON YOU KNOW THE DEAL BY
NOW. I WAS BEING SARCASTIC. I THINK BIDEN IS PROBABLY NOT
CONTROLLED BY THE POPE. HE'S A TROJAN HORSE FOR THE AMERICAN ANARCHISTS.
THESE ANARCHISTS HATE GOVERNMENT SO MUCH THEY'RE RUNNING A CANDIDATE FOR
PRESIDENT. WHO IF HE WINS WILL IMMEDIATELY STEP DOWN AND DISSOLVE THE
OFFICE AFTER WINNING.
Count On It
maybe go ahead and count on it! I dunno, who cares. Dijorino
pizza had a topping: It's Pepperoni, but I slabbed a piece of ham on top!
Breakfast Ham! That ain't great Sandwich Material. Now it's A MEAT
LOVERS Pizza. Hmm Dating Website for Fat/Obese People Called MeetLovers.
And its a pun because they all presumably are MeatLoverPizzaFans.
What's the percent of Vegetarians that are Obese? LMLTURQ. Hey of
course they can! In India, you're MORE LIKELY to be obese on a vegetarian
diet. I guess cause of all those Carbs! But the real good news is
I'm Facing North for the first time in a very long time. Probably like
a month or so. Maybe six weeks. Maybe 2 months! Not much lnger
than 2 months, though. Fascinating. Jeez. I
don't know what I'm gonna have for dinner! Maybe a ham sandwich! I
Don't Have All The Answers!
Presumably one day we'll have air conditioning again and then
I can use the oven again and then I Think That's Everything life is back to
normal. Oh. Right. Pandemic and Quarantine. Gotcha.
Anyway, I split Pizza up into 3rds to eat it, and this last 3rd I'm eating
now is solidly More Than The Other SUPPOSED thirds. I tried one slice of
the bologna a few days ago And I Don't Particularly Need This! BUt anyway
this pizza is delicious and there's plenty of it and I don't see how there can
be any negative consequences from overeating. At least I'm not a
vegetarian, so I should be Doing Fine in the Health Department. Hmm maybe
I should shave later today. Then I'd be doing fine in the Taking Care Of
I dunno. Three more paragraphs to go! HEY my
favorite Poll Projection Website is back online! Biden lost 3-5 points in
terms of Will He Win Projection (~92 down to 88%) which isn't so bad over the
course of two or three days! Also I'm sure that's not the best projection.
But it Still FEELS nice! Maybe not the most Accurate projection but its
still the BEST projection I've seen because it makes me FEEL Good. It's
the only projection I've seen. I've seen other polls but nowhere do I see
a Real PROJECTION. Not as of yet! The point is If I Write Two
More Paragraphs My Life Will Be Fine For The Rest Of The Day.
Cool! Hmm just spaced out Facing North for about 10,
15 minutes. North just has that effect on me I guess. Man I
gotta Face South for a few hours. Get my head in a better place.
Anyway I found my Recorder (The Instrument) that we were each issued in
Elementary School and I was like Man I Can Figure This Out Now. And
then I was like yeah I'm gonna do that for 90 seconds! And then I
was like yeah I've been doing this for Twenty Seconds I THINK I'M DONE NOW.
Jeez. Figure I'll finish #LeprechaunIIISummerToIII and then I dunno!
Maybe go back to some Interventions. I liked those. Some DVDs.
Maybe a My Strange Addiction. Spin off called My Strangle Addiction.
And it's about.. well, strangling, I suppose. That'd be where my mind goes
as a first thought for what that might be about, I dunno why.
Finally, the last paragraph! I am now facing
South. In anticipation of going to bed and watching TV. This is
where my computer will have to be for that arrangement so figured I'd get a head
start. Hey looks like My Dad will be teaching 1 or 2 classes For Virtual
School this Fall! Which is good, it looked like he was gonna be Dunzo for
the fall (and then presumably for the ever!) so the point is my Dad is A Good
Virtual Teacher and some may say he was a fine Regular Teacher but we have no
way of knowing, no records exist from then! Welp, that'll do it for
today. I'll see you guys tomorrow.
August 4, 2020
I'm halfway through Batman Returns AND I'VE GOT SOME THOUGHTS. 1) how Is
Alfred the only helper Bruce Wayne has? Dose he have permanent full time
maids or cooks or Other Helping Type People? Cause I'VE NEVER SEEN THEM!
Unless he's throwing a party. But that's on a party-by-party basis.
I mean, I SAW ALFRED BUYING GROCERIES in this film. Surely someone else should
be buying groceries! ...Or, alternatively, if he's got more helpers, how
are they not aware Bruce Wayne is Batman. They're not BLIND. They're
not DEAF. Unless they are. Maybe he only hires blind and/or
deaf people. Except not, "Or." Gotta be both!
Yeah! Also, I think the most generally appealing part
of over 50% of Super Hero moveis is HEY WOW THIS PROTAGONIST HAS
MULTIPLE MULTI-DIMENSIONAL, FLeshed Out, and Worthy Competor VILLIANS!
JUST LIKE ME!!! IN REAL LIFE! I've got too many worthy villains to
count!. Rarely happens outside of Comic Book Movies, the multiple
villians! What about multiple protagonists. Yes I'm sure
that's attractive to some but I dunno. I'd rather watch a movie where it's
one guy good vs 3 bad guys than 3 good guys vs 1 bad guy. I GET CONFUSED
ON WHO I'M SUPPOSED TO IDENTIFY WITH. Also, The Bat Signal. 1) Is it
visible in Daylight? Surely there's many crimes in Daylight that Batman
should be addressing. 2) Is Batman ALWAYS looking at the sky? Even
when he's in doors? ANd not around a window? I've seen this guy
inside ALL THE TIME and what happens then? Doesn't Add Up!
No beer today! No beer tomorrow! Beer
Thursday! I Like Those Odds! No Breakfast today! Maybe
breakfast tomorrow! I'll contunie having breakfast and/or not having
breakfast every day of the week in a completely unpredictable fashion.
Well, I'm sure you cuold tally up the variables, do some calculations, and make
a model to predict whether I will have breakfast or not on any given day that
has a reasonable rate of being accurate. I'm looking at YOU Nate Cohn.
You thought i was gonna say Nate Silver (once you got up to reading the, "Nate,"
part! I MIXED IT UP ON YOU!) Anyway there's a nurse here today right
now giving my Dad a blood infusion. Because he's greedy and wants all the
white blood cells (etc, ?) he can get his hands on!
Cool! Is there a thing where Nate Silver has a Side
Hustle where it's just like wealthy poeple want him to make models for weird
random things. Cause if so I WANNA GET ACCESS TO THOSE WEIRD THINGS
WEALTHY PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED IN. Could be PERVERTED stuff. Wealthy
people are GROSS AS FUCK. Sure that's where my mind goes. Prove
me wrong! Also it's perverted to be CRIMINAL and its perverted to
amass money by hurting and/or underpaying, and/or etc, other people. It's
Perverted By Nature! Just like... uh... what's a thing where nature
perverts you? I wanna say like in Evil Dead when the tree fucked the lady.
But that's just nature BEING a pervert AT YOU. Doesn't actually pervert
the lady. Can you PERVERT something or someone? As a verb? I
dunno LMLTHRUQ. "Can pervert be a verb." Oh yeah, sure it
can! To Pervert someone's statement. To deliberately
misuse or misconstrue someone's statement. To Pervert Someone.
That ain't so bad.
Huh. We're talking only 48 hours until I'm suckin' down
some suds. Hmm that's a lot of hours. You guys know how long an
hour takes, right? ALMSOT FIFTY OF THOSE?!? The The only good
thing is I'll be asleep for about half of that. Whew. Was
downstairs a few times with Nurse in the same room. Lady Nurse!
Around my age! I had to think okay I wanna act normal, what's normal
these days, oh, when I was wearing mask I felt normal, just imagine I'm wearing
a mask Right Now, what kinda thing would b I be doing, facial expressions I'd be
making, if only I were wearing a mask, also, now that I think about it, maybe I
should be wearing a mask, oh well, no way to go back now.
Fascinating. Also, fine, MAYBE Alfred can do it all
on his own. I don't think he can, but lets say he can. Bruce Wayne
is STILL overextending him. C'mon this guy is your best friend, he's like
family, he's a father/uncle/grandfather figure. Why dump all this shit on
him, he'll eventually grow weary and discontented. He's working round the
clock! If you care about this guy at all you gotta be getting extra help.
Also Once A Week YOU should have to be HIS Butler. It's a fun mix-em-up
that you'll both get a kick out of and this way you can relate to him better to
see what his life and duties are all about! I feel very strongly about
this for some reason no one is really sure of. Hey the section of entry is
What They Tell Me
I cleaned up my room. You know what that means! I can write this
facing North because that deskspace is cleared out. I want to have lunch
but the nurse is still here in our kitchen. You know what that
means! Waiting for her to leave so I can have lunch. Look if it
was as simple as making a sandwich for 60 seconds I'm on board. I've
been going down for coffee for up to 90 seconds. But with the soup and
everything we're talkin OVER FIVE MINUTES. I can't do that! Show
me someone who could be in a room with A STRANGER for over five minutes and I'LL
SHOW YOU a... well.. the point is I don't think this person exists at all.
But if you show me then I guess I was wrong. Sorry. Carry on!
Huh. Lunch today most likely be 2HotDog1Bun and some
soup. Different kinds of hot dogs! Gonna pair the 45 cal SawdustDogs
with the 150 cal PresumablyRegularHotDog. And then part of the deal is
trying a bite of each individually. So ONCE and FOR ALL how do these
differ in taste. I'll keep you updated on this situation as it
progresses. Anyway yeah my room is clean as truck. HEY I made
contact with Nurse (I said HELLOOOO NURSE! jk that wasn't it). The kitchen
has TWO lights because it's like a Right Angle Kitchen. I had my section
light on because I was doin' coffee. Then she comes into MY area of the
kitchen somewhat, at that Right Angle specifically. And I was done and I
was like is it okay if I turn this light off. And she said Yeah
sure! And I was like SEE YOU IN HELL LIGLHT and I made it
DISAPPEAR COMPLETELY, POSSIBLY PERMANENTLY (Best Residential Person Ever?)
So I got that going for me. Also, I got Lunch Going For
Me in part III of entry, whether nurse is here or not! Possibly! I'm
gonna have to look into that one! I'll keep you updated on this situation
as it progresses. I didn't know where HELLO NURSE came from.
I googled it. Animaniacs! That's odd I don't REMEMBER remembering
Animaniacs. But it does seem to check out so what can I do just move
on with my life. I kinda thought it would be a Jerry Lewis thing.
No reason to not suspect it was originally. I'M GONNA LOOK THAT UP A
LITTLE BIT MORE COMPREHENSIVELY. NOPE ANIMANIACS THROUGH AND
Sweet. What else is going on. I guess
Animaniacs are perverts? THEY'RE PERVERTING ON THIS CARTOON NURSE TIME AND
TIME AGAIN. It's weird that Trump's approval rating being ~41.2 instead of
~40.2 upsets me to a measurable degree. Hey THIS HALF A GUY OUT
OF A HUNDRED CHANGED HIS MIND. WHATEVER WILL WE DO. AlAlso I'm
counting Disapproval as a thing. This guy took .5% off Disapproval and
added .5% to Approval. So it's not 100% MATH, but the point is WHAT THE
HELL THIS HALF A GUY IS A FUCKING MORON ALL THIS IS GOING ON AND
STILL THERE'S HALF OF A GUY EVERY HUNDRED GOING BACK TO TRUMP?
Today it's half a guy. By next month, it MAY BE ANOTHER... ENTIRE...FULL
GUY. OH NO WE'RE SCREWED. Maybe we are, I dunno, I'm not,
"Great," at following Poll Math.
I dunno, what else is going on. Remember how Trump
was impeached in January. Oh right that rings a bell. The
genius of Trump is that who can even remember what he was impeached for.
Ukraine. Soliciting campaign help from Ukraine as a quid pro pro which
impacts part of our official foreign policy. Oh right That DOES Sound
Bad! Hmm maybe this scandal should be taken seriously instead of
COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN. That's kind of odd! I'm worried people
will be TOO HAPPY if Trump loses election and then Biden is appointed and
suddenly Joe Biden Is Really President. We'd all just be grinning ear to
ear, right. EXCEPT FOR THIS HALF A GUY. HE HAD HIS CHANCE TO BE ON TEAM
JOE AND DISAPPROVE OF TRUMP AND HE WENT BACK TO TRUMP THIS HALF A GUY IS DEAD
Hmm. Even Slaves were considered THREE
FIFTHS of a person. This Half a person... uh... uh... ... 1) this riff
didn't make sense in the first place 2) now it makes even less sense 3) why go
there 4) THIS HALF A GUY IS GETTING ON MY NERVES WHAT'S TO BE DONE. I'm
worried about the Census being stopped a month early. But what really
worries me is how the Census is being stopped a month early IN THE ABSTRACT.
I get that it's a, "Loss," and, "Bad for us." But instead of processing
WHY, I'm just processing it as well lets see I'm under the impression it's a,
"Loss," and is, "Bad for us!" Someone should explain it better to me!
My impression is something like, they undercount minorities, and then those
minority-concentrated areas receive less funding or something? I KINDA get
it but not 100%. How do we know This Last Month was Minority
Neighborhoods. Maybe that's where they started counting!
Probably not! But that's where MY mind goes.
Ain't bad! Ain't Great, Either!
got lunch going on. Nurse will be leaving soon, but she was preoccupied
with My Father so I was able to microwave some crap UNNOTICED. Also is
Worse Hot Dog Actually Worse? Yeah a little! Is it 100 Calories
Worse? I dunno that's for The Courts To Decide! Well, great.
Watched Jojo Rabbit yesterday. I dunno what to make of that movie! I
guess it's good? But it makes me uncomfortable! And then I
feel comfortable again! Then mostly more and more comfortable as it
goes on. So I got that going for me is the point. Also When We
Eat Soup do we eat from the spoon horizontally or vertically? I'm pretty
sure horizontally is easier and probably accepted socially. But no one
exer explicitly guided me through this so I have no way of knowing.
LMLTURQ. YEP SIDEWAYS SEEMS TO CHECK OUT. And you sorta SUCK
IT IN. you don't stick spoon in your mouth. Bring it close to mouth
and then SUCK. That's my own addendum.
Cool! The point is Yes I Still Have Ham and No I
Don't Know Why I Got Ham but Yes I Will Finish it but No I Won't Be Happy About
It. I dunno. The vertical spoon, ON OCCASION, SOMETIMES is okay.
That's my hot take. But I also Slurp AS A RULE either from spoon or just
sup the entire bowl. So you can't be taking Soup Lessons From Me is the
point I've long since accepted the fact I shan't AND WON'T eat soup in company
either way so might as well go to town! Anyway, hoping to get Heir
Conditioning done tomorrow. And by done I mean fixed.
And by Heir Conditioning I mean Air Conditioning. Or maybe
Jane Eyre Conditioning. Something along those lines is the point.
Hey its raining outside I can hear it and everything.
I'm thinking about getting back into podcasts. It's fun
because 1) New Content 2)People and Teams that I enjoy 3)I dunno mainly the
first 3 things (including, "It's fun," as a thing) Anyway in a couple of
weeks FIVE MONTHS OF AN EVERY DAY ENTRY. That's practically, I, I can't
even comprehend what an achievement and accomplishment that is. Also
I'm gonna have dinner in about 5 hours. I can't even, wow, man, that's,
that's just great. Real Great. The The point is I'm starting to
sweat but I don't blame the hot soup, I blame the rain going on outside.
Everyone knows rain makes the people out of range from the rain sweat.
They see humidity and/or perspiration going on and it activates the sweat glands
because They Wanna Be In On The Action, Too.
Wow. Hey I think I still have 1/3rd of Pizza Left.
That'll make a fine supper, just fine. I don't need to watch Batman.
No one needs to watch Batman. Unless if they are very close to me and
haven't watched The Dark Knight Trilogy. Then, yes, They Need To Watch
Batman. Even then, not really! I respect other people's
boundaries! Presumably, at least. Hey entry is almost over.
What paragraph of section III we at? FOUR? WOW THAT MEANS ONLY 1.5
#P left to go. #P is the closest thing I could approximate to be The
paragraph Character without googling Paragraph Character because I'm sure it
Exists Somewhere In Our Text Based Computering. #TrumpLikesBarGraphs THAT'S
SURE TO GET HIS GOAT. Trump wants Barr.. to bar... Grap.... didn't even
get to the, "H," of that word, that's how much I wanna bail on this, "Bit!"
Alright. Whattado, then. Podcast is really
more of a NIGHT TIME activity. Daytime is more like, well, something else,
let's just say that. When you're having a glass of beverage (soda, etc) do
you drink it vertically or horizontally. That Joke, "ain't me."
But now I know what jokes, "aren't me," so I can avoid them in the future.
MAN OH MAN it's raining and winding outside and the wind made a Whistling Noise
somehow. The point is the entry is over in roughly 4,5 sentences.
Cleaned up my room. Back into podcasts. Beer in 2 days. Nurse
is gone. That's about it, I'll see you guys later!
August 3, 2020
Getting Tired Of Myself
Someone's gotta do it! Anyway, Monday Morning. By which I mean
Monday Afternoon. From now on Afternoons are Mornings, Evenings are
Afternoons, Nights are Evenings, and Late Night is Night. I assume this
has been agreed upon and codified even without and before my analysis.
It all checks out EXCEPT for me, where halfway through the day, it
jumps ahead two spaces in the right direction. Afternoon is morning.
But then suddenly Evening is NIGHT. Night is EXTRA NIGHT. The point
is I HAVE NO AFTERNOON. I think you could trace that back to This This
Thing I'm Doing Right Now. Work is Afternoon. This is my job.
Late Afternoon, when this is done (give or take a couple hours), well, its like
alright done! I've Accomplished Today. Now the rest is just A Lotta Nothin'.
Cool! This, too, is a whole lotta nothin'.
Which is a phrase. I would think a Whole Lotta Nothin is still More
Somethin than just Non Nothin' Nothin'. I forget what I was talking
about. Anyway dinner last night was Just Soup! Now I have to
finish Roast Beef + Breakfast Ham Sandwich for lunch today! With some of
that Spanish, "Spanish Rice," as a side. Presumably Air Conditioning Fixer
Uppers are coming into the house in a couple of hours. A Man And His
Apprentice as it was explained to me. Actually it was explained to me as
Someone is coming With A Kid. And it turns out that means A Man And
His Adult, But Young, Apprentice. Also if Harry Potter is a Sorcerer's
apprentice exactly WHICH Sorcerer. I've only seen 25% of Harry
Potter and remember even less (it'd be weird if I remember more... actually...
I kinda DO THINK I remember more... this is awkward...), but if I remember
ANYTHING (which I May Not) Yeah he's in Hogwarts there are lots of sorcerers
teaching him but is there really ONE specific Sorcerer that Harry Potter is
Apprenticing? I DOUBT IT. Google says There's No Such Thing as, "The
Sorcerer's Apprentice." There's a, "Sorcerer's Stone." Did I mean
Sorcerer's Stone? NO OF COURSE NOT! This was just a joke.
Hah hah. Apprentice. I GET IT.
It's funny because I Was In On The Joke The Entire
Time. Anyway what else do I got goin' on. Harry Potter gotta be
someone's apprentice. It seems wrong that he absorbs a lot from half a
dozen or more professors. PICK A LANE HARRY POTTER. That's
how I feel. That's the point I'm trying to make, I guess. Anyway,
this is the last day in the next three days of having beer to drink. I
feel okay with that! I don't really have a choice! My only choice is
to either Feel Okay With It or Not Feel Okay With It. Hmm sounds like I
do have a choice. And, "Not feeling okay with it," is not without its
charms. Actually, yeah, I changed my mind. I'm NOT gonna feel
okay with it! But what can I do.
Yeesh. My enthusiasm for Dick Van Dykes fell off a
cliff a week ago. I got deep into Season 4 of 5 and I suddenly realized
I haven't really enjoyed this since season 2. I haven't REALLY (Really!)
enjoyed it since season one. Am I pot committed to the whole thing?
Yeah Probably! Anyway, spoiler alert-- today's entry I am facing EAST.
At least so far. I may mix it up and go back to facing SOUTH. I'd
face NORTH but I'd have to clean off that desk and that could take FIVE minutes.
Anyway, a fly buzzin' around my room while I was doin' my walking. Hmm
wonder if all these dozens of pieces of gum that I Throw out into the garbage
UNSUCCESSFULLY and end up Not In Garbage has anything to do with that.
It can't be High In Sugar, right? But It's Gotta Have Some Sugar, Right?
Maybe I chewed the sugar out of it. When you've chewed gum for 5
minutes or so, it loses its flavor. That's because I chewed up the sugar
I often chew gum in bed trying to fall asleep for 90
seconds and then am like I don't II don't wanna be chewing gum!
I'll never fall asleep this way! So it's a real waste of 6 pieces of
gum each night (doing it THREE TIMES with 2 pieces each time). I
don't like reading the Recent Polls page of FiveThirtyEight, that's
presumably is just All The Latest Polls across Political Spectrum. Trump
Approval, General Election, General Election Per State, Congress, etc.
Because a third of the time for some reason a poll from a year ago shows up and
if you're not paying attention You Think It's New! But sometimes it'll be
like HERE'S THE LATEST NEW DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY POLL and you're like hmm
I gotta be paying more attention to these dates. Or, maybe the first
time you're like, hmm wonder why they did this poll so late. But by
the second or third time you figure out the score.
Cool! Figure I'll have cup o' coffee #2 of (between 2
and 4!) also that shouldn't have been in parenthesis. Oh well what can
I do about it, it's been done. The point is Polls (From Today!) show
that Biden is Less Further Behind in MONTANA than Trump is in WISCONSIN FOR
INSTANCE. Two LEGIT RECENT POLLS! Fascinating.
Montana Max was the Tiny Toons charector who was just some kid who was rich.
I think most Tiny Toons were like Looney Tunes characters but younger. Not
sure who Mr. Montana Max was in Looney Tunes. I think That Didn't Exist.
LMLTURQ. Yep no Senior Montana Max. But then again maybe
there was a large contingent of Tiny Tunes who were Originals. I DON'T
HAVE ALL THE DETAILS.
Yeesh. Is Montana a Tipping State? Probably not.
I'd bet they average around 9, 10% as a tip. I bet Blue States are Higher
Tipping States. Just a guess. Maybe FiveThirtyEight should
do a poll about it. And then release it in 18 months. Sounds
You can't take people's words on if and how much they tip! Also you
can't take people's words on if and whom they support for president!
Also you can't take FiveThirtyEight's Words that they're... actually...
gonna... uh... I forget. Anyway, jeez, how far into this entry
are we. Hey how about that 7 paragraphs for Section #1. I'll be back
in a bit! Where did I get, "Sorcerer's Apprentice," from.
Upon further reflection, there is a Sorcerer's Apprentice film and/or book.
It's just not Harry Potter. Yea I dunno about that I still
think Everybody Else Is Wrong And Only I Am Right.
thinking about how there are household products with alcohol in them that can
give you weird Trippy Trips, and I wonder, how come no one UTILIZES THAT?
Just make alcohol that'll FUCK US UP, make it so that it FUCKS US UP THE
RIGHT WAY, AND ALSO Isn't 100% Poison. Anyway. I I get
people that drink Mouthwash. You guys are only going half way, partially
committing! Some People Go The Extra Mile. They want their internal
organs (stomach, etc?) to be minty fresh and I think they should be COMMENDED
not dissuaded. I think people got used to Trump and Republicans hawking
that Quaad or CHord Or whaever, that drug. But it's like, 100% but in
other words, hmm a couple months ago Trump said we should start drinking
mouth wash. Except WORSE! And he still says it! Every day!
People have somehow grown used to this!
I was thinking about it and if Biden wins, somethin
has to be The Last Nail In His (Trump, etc?) Coffin. It could easily be
some lingering thing we've known about. But there is going to be SOME
story the several days before election and I dunno, where can they go?
What theme can they draw upon. What's the Endgame Message. I
dunno either! ANYWAY I don't get people being afraid of graveyards
and/or corpses. Look, of all the people who may possibly wish/cause you
harm and try to hurt you, DEAD PEOPLE ARE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LIST.
They're the only people in the world who literally CAN'T, in ANY WAY SHAPE OR
FORM, EVER DO ANYTHING BAD TO YOU. What I'm trying to say is LETS
KILL TRUMP. Fine, or not, it's up to you!
What else is going on. Hey good news Sanders is
ahead of Bloomberg by SEVEN Points! Wasn't Bloomberg gonna spend
hundreds of millions of dollars fighting Trump? Whatever happened to that.
At the very least, if he's not gonna spend that money fighting Trump, he should
Just Give Me The Money. I don't even need all of it. Just, you say
there's hundreds of millions? 1% of that is fine. And then keep the
other 99%, I won't bring attention and alert your lies/tardiness to anyone, and
we call it a day! Oops I just did that. I guess I'll never
see any of that 1% of hundreds of millions of dollars. Which I could
calculate how much that would equate. 15 million dollars? I
think that's about 1% of hundreds. Of Millions. Of Dollars.
Cool! 15 billion dollars is Still Hundreds of Millions of dollars.
Just more than 10 hundreds of millions of dollars. GET ON BOARD WITH MATH.
What else is going on in the wide world of crap. Also
I've sen these Lincoln Project ads and They're Fine! There's nothing
exceptional about them. Maybe that's because I'm not the target audience!
But I am an audience that can assume the form of a Target Audience AT WILL and
no form I am in is particularly jazzed and excited by or about these ads.
Yeah, great, you're ex Republicans. Anti-Trump. GOOD but I
DON'T CARE! It's true Dead People Can't Hurt Us. Hmm.
Trying to come up with scenarios where Dead People Can Hurt Us-- A 127 Hours
situation but you're trapped under an avalanche of Dead People's Bodies.
You're a necro-cannibal and you get sick. You're a necro-PHELIAC and you
get sick. You see a corpse and get Scared To Death (Having a heart attack,
etc.) Someone has rigged up this dead body like a puppet and uses it to
knock you out with blunt force, or by attaching very sharp things that can Cut
You to the dead body, etc. You ARE the dead body. Hmm that last
one is a Head Scratcher.
I dunno. Figure I'll have lunch during Part III of
the entry. Figure I'll put on Pants for Part III of the entry. I
guess. I'm a Narco-Pheliac which means I Love Drugs. Seems to
check out, right? Except for how I'm misusing several words consciously.
ah well such is life. Well, I dunno. How's the entry going so
far. 2/3rds Over! SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD ENTRY TO ME (based on that, etc.)
Any entry that is close to (or actually, etc) finished is Good In My Book.
Because now it is explicitly part of My Book. This website is a book.
I had no idea but now I realize. You can't Rhyme, they're all slant
rhymes, I'm insisting you shant rhyme. I was inspired for that, "rap,"
by thinking of the phrase, "Good In My Book."
I'm Back On Board
have I been continuing to drink hot coffee and eat hot soup in the Sweatpandemic?
Because that LOCALIZES the heat. If I'm hot all over, and I drink some hot
coffee, I forget about Other Parts Of My Body Being Hot, and now only the inside
of my mouth and gullet are hot. How often do you guys burn your tongue on
hot food. I'd say for me it's maybe two times a month. And each time
it's like WHY WHERE DID I GO WRONG! I COULD HAVE HAD IT SLIGHTLY LESS
HOTTER DAMNIT WHEN WILL I EVER LEARN. These are the real issues for
some reason! Anyway whatta watch for the rest of the day. Continue
my #LeprechaunSummerToSettleFor, that sounds about right. Man oh man
when This Website gets a load of the poll This OTHER Website has already
registered, this First Website Is Gonna Freak Out And Change Their Calculations
like... I think that's pretty clever & accurate.
Anyway lunch has commenced. Drank 2 of last 3 beers.
Will try to save 3rd until entry is over. I'm almost there so it shouldn't
be too hard. Mm that rice sure is Spanish. And that Breakfast
Ham is sure Ham. Don't even get me started on The Hot Dog Bun.
The point is, non-beer-wise, here's Fresh Meal I have left over until Thursay --
some ham, 1 portion of rice... that's about it. Everything else is
at my discretion! Finally! I got all those Frozen Burritos!
They sell them individually for 2 or 3. 99! And they had a deal You Get
Five for 10 dollars! I'll take that deal every day of the week. Also
presumably Air Conditioning is fixed today hopefully, so then I can start using
oven again! That's What She Said. Why are people so
constantly thinking In The Back Of Their Mind Exactly What it Was That
She Said. Anyway I figured out if I lightly toast Hot Dog Bun it tastes
better. Only problem is 1) gotta cut it in half 2)doesn't fit neatly into
toaster so I need to fish it out with a fork when its done 3)electrocution.
Hey if they didn't want us to electrocute ourselves by misusing kitchen
appliances then they shouldn't have given me kitchen appliances.
Jeez. There's that Free Bologna they gave us.
I don't fuck with no Free Bologna Not This Week At Least! Look I'm sure
Free Bologna is delicious but I'm watching my figure! That's gotta be high
in calories. Have you ever SEEN a bologna? Hmm. Now I kinda
wonder What Exactly Is Bologna and Why Call It Bologna. LMLTURQ.
Bologna is a kind of sauage?! I dunno that seems like a lie.
Not really. Always kind of imagined it as A Lot Of Things At Once.
Hot Dogs Are Like That. And Hot Dogs Are Sausages! Why Not Bologna.
Anyway I lost track of why I was interested in this. In retrospect its not
interesting at all and I kinda feel like just moving on. Story of
Wow. I've grown to enjoy Cold Hot Coffee.
Not iced coffee. Just Hot Coffee that's been at room temperature for half a day.
Resume that Cup Of Coffee 18 hours later, Delicious! Tastes like coffee
BUt Room Temperature. Makes ya think What Else You Might Enjoy At Room
Temperature. Eh. Probably Just Coffee. More or less.
Looks like Sorcerer's Apprentice was a Jay Baruchel vehicle. You
know, the guy whose like, hey that guy! I like that guy! Not sure
why! Anyway, jeez, Monday, huh? Good ol' Moonday. It's
the one day of the week the Moon really makes itself known! We all know
how Lunar Patterns abide by the days of the week. Anyway looks like
Private Enterprise visited the moon or something. Good for them! I'd
visit the moon but I don't feel like it. Not sure what that
sentence accomplishes. Makes me seem stupid! Ah so that's
what it accomplishes very well carry on.
Sweatin'. Up. A. Storm. Well, it's not
that bad. It's relatively ordinary hot sweating. Not Extraordinary
hot sweating. Also I DON'T LIKE THAT WORD. Extraordinary shouldn't
mean non-ordinary. It should mean EXCEPTIONALLY ORDINARY.
I feel very strongly about this for some reason no one is really sure of.
The point is Jay Baruchel is extraordinary for some reason no one is really sure
of. Right? What else. The point is This Is Not A Book.
Get that out of your head right now! Well, first put it bcak in your head,
from several paragraphs ago. Now that it's in your head, remove it from
your head! Even less in your head than it was a second ago before I
reminded you of it to put it in your head again!
One or two more paragraphs I guess. How's that working
out for me. Wow. Looking forward to Fall Arriving. Well, not
so much as it arriving. Fall arriving is Okay! But I look forward to
Fall, just Fall Existing. But the arrival marks the beginning of Fall
Existing so I look forward to that as a Starting-Off Point. Anyway just
thought about how the year 2021 is up next. Uhoh 2021 THAT SOUNDS LIKE
TOO MUCH OF THE FUTURE AND OFTEN FUTURES ARE DYSTOPIAN! I dunno.
We've already reached Dystopia. I don't see a Utopia in the cards for
2021. What's halfway between Dystopia and Utopia. Topia.
Metopia. Protopia. Anyway. I know we all thought 2020 was
REALLY the future but now with further consideration surely we all agree 2021
REALLY IS The Future This Time! I mean, c'mon. 2020 is like the
end of the 2010's abstractly. It's like how Ten is practically a single
digit, it's included in one-to-tens. So basically next year, no question
about it, 2020's have arrived. God Damn Hypothetical year From The Future!
I JUST WENT THROUGH THE 2010'S HOW MANY LIVING THROUGH DECADES IS EVER
Last paragraph. Also MOVIES and TVS are all out of
whack. I rely on entertainment to guide me through periods of life!
Oh well such is life. I feel bad that most of my Heroes are out of
work or getting revenue because of Pandemic. Musicians, comedians,
Moviemakers, all three, people who are 2, people who identify as a comedian but
are really musicians, All The Things That Are People Who... Do... Things...
anyway hwat was I talking about. Oh right, entry is almost over!
So, great, what else. I wish my heroes the best of luck. I'm not
into many totally obscure things/people in The Arts, so hopefully if I know of
and enjoy Any Specific Hero, they're successful enough that they can resume
their earning money for their vocation if this ever ends. On the other
hand I've been designed to work from home and Am Doing This Every Day And Now
HAS BEEN MY TIME TO SHINE SO FOR ME IT'S WORKING OUT PRETTY GOOD... well I'm
kinda done shining now. Only so much you can shine! And I GOT THINGS
TO DO and PEOPLE TO BE. Sure, great, what else. That's the end of
the entry. I'll see you guys later!
August 2, 2020
Turn This Car Around
Probably! Man last night I thought that title was The Tops.
And aesthetically speaking It Is. Just look! But in
terms of The Tops meaning good, no, it's not. I dunno maybe it
is. It may grow on me again. Anyway since we're all gaining
weight, not cutting our hair, what other bad habits are we all succumbing to.
For me, haven't shaved in a few weeks! But then again most of my adult
life I Go Months Without Shaving. Been drinking alcohol 5 times a
week. But then again most of my adult life I was either Drinking
Alcohol Five Times A Week or Would Be Interested In Drinking Alcohol Five Times
A Week But Just Didn't Have The Means To Get There. Also, now that I
think about it, most of my adult life I go months without a haircut anyway.
And for probably 60, 65% of my adult life I Been Over Eating. Hmm.
Turns out I was always just very unhealthy and not taking care of myself but
Pandemic Quarantine Has Brought Everyone Down To My Level!
Hah! Now whose laughing!
Responsible People In Many Places aren't leaving the house for anything.
WELCOME TO MY WORLD! I think maybe The Next Level for
Republican/Conservative Response To Pandemic is just hey lets be
philosophical about it, what does life really mean, what is life really worth?
Philosophers always pondered this It's Nothing New and You Can't Fault Us For
Just Contemplating Philosophy! You LIBERALS say you love philosophy and
once we do philosophy OH SUDDENLY IT'S NO GOOD. Anyway I'm way ahead
of the curve on that prediction. Anyway. Same people who say
all life is precious re: abortion! ALRIGHT I DUNKED ON THESE
HYPOTHETICAL PEOPLE FROM THE FUTURE! Not a bad name for a Campy Sci-Fi
movie. HYPOTHETICAL PEOPLE FROM THE FUTURE!
Anyway. Gonna start beer... now. I can
re-watch the Leprechaun Franchise. In fact, I started! And Jennifer
Aniston Has Got Somethin' Goin On. And Warwick Davis is an inspiration to
All Of Us Significantly Shorter Men. Look when I was a teenager they
told me I could either be a jockey or a leprechaun and I made my choice.
I'm A Jockey sort of. Except for Literally, metaphorically, or in any
sense. In Any Sense is THE ONLY way I'm not a jockey. Anyway,
I Dunno! Maybe I AM a leprechaun! I am always after Me Gold
and Want To Kill People Who Are In The Way Of Me Getting Me Gold. Yep
seems to check out. I'm a Giant Leprechaun, though. Seems about
right. Seems to Check Out All Over The Place.
Jeez. Think I'm gonna have some sort of sandwich +
soup for lunch. Seems to check out as a good way to go with my life today!
Watched Batman: The First Batman: The Third Or So Incarnation Of Live Action
Batmans: The One Where I Dunno What TO Make Of Michael Keaton. I think he
was the Tom Hanks of the 5 years before Tom Hanks became Tom Hanks. That's
my best interpretation of what Michael Keaton was. Maybe 15% more silly
and/or absurd and/or comic than Tom Hanks Being Tom Hanks. YOU KNOW WHAT
I'M GETTING AT. Probably. Been having Donuts for breakfast a
lot of the time the last week. We got those Entenmanns Donuts VARIETY PACK
not just the classic chocolate donuts. And anyway box says these Variety
Donuts range from 220-260 calories each but I'M NOT BUYING IT. I put each
one down as 300 calories and even THAT I feel is too low. GOD DAMN
IRRESPONSIBLE CALORIE COUNTS.
Anyway. I'm not sure what Michael Keaton Batman does in
his spare time. And by spare time I mean MOST of his time. Batman is
more or less his Spare Time. But the point is, for his majority of time,
I don't think he has a job at Wayne Enterprises or something. And he's not
an all-out Flashy PlayBoy like other Batmen sometimes are. I think he's
just oh yeah that super rich guy he hangs around in his house, its not WEIRD,
he's just, I dunno what he does. Friends with his butler. Well, good
for him, I dunno. That was A Gotham City Spectator talking about The
Ba.. wait no, The Bruce Wayne. The greatest trick Batman Ever
Pulled Was Convincing Us To Identify With Batman Villains More than Batman.
None of us are super rich, fight crime, date models... yep I MUST BE the
Penguin. Per my physical stature. On day I'd like to be The Joker
but I'm not counting on it!
Also Yeah I Wanna be THE Joker. I don't
wanna be Just JOKER. I feel very strongly about this! I think
it's funny that whenever you reboot a comic book franchise you often need to
devote a fair amount of time (either a significant amount of the First New Movie
or ALL OF IT) to Origin Stories. So basically we just see Origin Story
After Origin Story After Origin Story. Because as soon as we're like ok
I GET THIS incarnation of Franchise, what the background is, now I'm settled int...
OOP NEW INCARNATION NOW, BACK TO SQUARE ONE. It's not EVERY Comic
Book Movie. But a significant amount! Never Ending Origin Story.
If we're really supposed to identify with Film Super Heroes, that's part of the
deal. We're all just Never Ending Origin Stories. Anyway, I dunno,
maybe it's just that Origin Stories Are FUN And That's What The People Wanna
See! I'm not here to Shit on Origin Stories!
Bets Are Off
believe that's a Gambling Phrase. But it means something different
Literally and Metaphorically In Phrase. All Bets Are Off means ANYTHING
CAN HAPPEN. In Casino, All Bets Are Off means NO MORE BETS WE'RE
CLOSING THIS ROUND OF ANYTHING CAN BE HAPPENING. I get that That's
When The Chance Probability Starts. So I guess For People Who Have Bets
Going, now, Anything Can Happen!. But for People Who Couldn't Get Their
Bets In On Time, DUNZO NOTHINs happening. This paragraph is a possible
metaphor for Vote By Mail in 2020. Anyway Lunch Today we're talking
either a Roast Beef Sandwich, or, if there's not enough Roast Beef, a Roast Beef
and VIRGINIA Ham Sandwich! That's some High Quality Ham for a sandwich.
That's BREAKFAST Ham.
Fascinating. Anyway. I feel like I saw Batman
Forever A Lot Of Times presumably because I had it on VHS. But I also feel
like I've seen it maybe One Times past The Year Of Our Lord 2000. Batman &
Robin, similiar situation, but I probably only watched it HALF AS MUCH as Batman
Forever. Possibly because it was released several years later and those
few years were KEY VHS WATCHING AS A CHILD years. Also The Simpsons I
am Up To Right Now, Season 8, I definitely had 2/3rds OR MORE of these on tape.
That was One Simpsons Tape where I had A Bunch Of Episodes In Order And
Everything! Anyway I dunno what else is going on and crap.
Anyway I've come back around on Beef Barley Soup. Yeah it's still gross
pouring it into bowl cold but I'm So Over That Bothering Me. I can focus,
rightly, on enjoying it!
Cool. Anyway, thinking about Rant About Joe Biden
VP, I think the reason I feel the way I feel is that It's Bullshit framing it as
Who Do WE Want And The Various WES and, etc. Look Joe Biden is gonna
pick who Joe Biden picks as VP. It's all an Act from Team Biden to get
you excited like you have a say. You have no say! But they decided
that they might raise more money or support by having a Veepstakes linger on for
months. Hey Veepstakes that's pretty clever I wonder How Many Dozens Of
People Have Made That Pun Before. Maybe part of the premise is that,
dating back a year, when Democratic Primary Season was still in full swing,
not a lot of people EXCITED about Joe Biden. Maybe if he teases All Our
Collective Imaginary VEEPs, they'll get excited about whoever they individually
fantasize about wanting, and then all different factions will transfer that to
Biden. Look I'm Already Excited about Dumping Trump. I don't
need your games! Probably not, at least. Maybe I DO need your
games! I wouldn't put it past me!
Anyway. The point is I can have as late a lunch as
I want because I can have a late dinner whenever I want! Maybe a It's
Not Dinner Its Dinjorno for dinner! I enjoy that crap for some reason.
Man oh man am I gonna watch some movies later. #LeprechaunSummerForAWhile.
Anyway. My parents are very concerned with any appliance that
uses/produces heat. I couldn't leave coffee machine on, even after first
cup of coffee (and before Next Cup Of Coffee), it would make kitchen too
hot! Gotta microwave second cup if I want it! I guess they're not
worried about Microwave Heat. I withdraw this premise. Sounds
about right. I think there should be Walk In Microwaves. Just to
help us Identify With Food. Not sure what that accomplishes.
Fascinating! We have no choice in terms of Biden
VP. It's ALL A SCAM! Whew, though, to have a President who is 25%
scam instead of 98% scam. What a dream that would be! And that's
not a Jab at Joe Biden. 25% scam? As far as Presidents go?
That's not so bad! This Leprechaun movie is a scam. It makes me
like Teenage or Early 20's Jennifer Aniston when IT KNOWS I have no shot with
Late Teenage/Early 20's Jennifer Aniston. Whatta let down!
However they did record for history Jennifer Aniston as a Teenage/Early 20's.
Without this movie I'd Have Never Known! Still kinda feels like 65% A
Ugh. Did people before 2000 really recognize about
the Electoral College? I mean, I was just a kid, but I always kinda just
assumed ok president, popular vote, one vote for, one vote against, it's all
the same wherever you live In America. So was that Because I Was In
Elemtary School or was it because until 2000 it was always consistant with
popular vote for the most part. The point is we don't live in America.
We live in Pennslvohioida. As Per who gets to decide who our Next (and
All Future) presidents will be! Oh well if I didn't want our president
to be decided by Those Who Live In Wisconsin I SHOULD HAVE LIVED IN ANOTHER
WISCONSIN AIN'T NO TIPPING STATE, C'MON. I
don't like that we are all familiar with the concept of The Tipping State.
It's a real Net Negative On All Of Us. Anyway, I dunno. Another
paragraph, then part III, then lunch, then some more crap, eventually it'll be
tomorrow, then next week is right around the corner... I dunno.
I mean, we take it for granted, we live in Electoral College Place, but
we've grown accustomed to the idea yeah my vote DOESN'T COUNT. Only
people who live in This Dozen Of States Really Matter At All. And you can
narrow it down even further from that in terms of Tipping States... WE
LIVE IN A DEMOCRACY WE THOUGHT. WHAT THE HELL WE'RE ALL JUST ON BOARD WITH
OUR VOTES FOR PRESIDENT, THE MOST IMPORTANT ELECTED OFFICIAL IN THE LAND,
LITERALLY NOT COUNTING? I think that makes it easier for us to turn a
blind eye to voter suppression and invalidation. We're used to OUR
votes not counting so it's not so crazy to us that Other People's Votes Not
Being Counted isn't also part of the deal.
What I Meant
Heightist talk when it comes to Trump. "He is a small man."
Hey Fuck You Too! The point is WARWICK DAVIS' LEPRECHAUN IS LARGER
THAN LIFE! --A very generous film critic in 1993. Anyway not 100%
on board with these hot dog buns. I thought they would be the same as The
Dinner Rolls From Same Brand-- just in a different shape. I was wrong!
Tastes Worse! But I'm pot committed to these hot dog buns is the point.
I think it was a pack of 8. I've only had 2 Thus Far! What other
Movies Involve People HOt Doggin. There's Batman. He's always
like yep sometimes I'm BATMAN hot doggin it, sometimes I'm BRUCE WAYNE, hot
doggin it, sometimes I'M THE ACTOR PLAYING BATMAN/BRUCE WAYNE hot doggin it..
sometimes I'm providing a platform and acting as a foil to Batman VILLAINS hot
doggin' it... I forget what the point of this paragraph was.
Huh. If I remember correctly, the Leprechaun
Franchise... hmm, lemme interrupt myself. I was gonna say As
Franchise Goes On, It Gets Less Good. But now that I think about it NO
I'M ON BOARD WITH LEPRECHAUN GOES TO LAS VEGAS, LEPRECHAUN GOES TO SPACE,
LEPRECHAUN GOES TO, "THE HOOD." I know it seems stupid but I'm
interested in Once Again seeing what those things are all about! HOW
OLD IS JENNIFER ANISTON IN THIS MOVIE EXACTLY. TWENTY FOUR. THAT'S
PREFECT, JUST PERFECT. I mean, if it was Late Teens to Early 20's.
That's literally the oldest you can be to fit that qualification! Anyway
how old is Jennifer Aniston now. Hmm around 54 years old.
It's been exactly 30 years since 1993, I think we can all agree on that Quick
Estimation. Also when movie was Filmed maybe she was 23. I DON'T
HAVE ANY OF THE ANSWERS.
Cool! Is it just me or should QANON people STAY
ANON. Gottem! I'm surprised I got no Follow Up E-mails from Guy
Who Knew One Of My Passwords On Telephone. Guess he wasn't expecting me to
Call His Bluff By Never Responding And Changing My Passwords Safely From My
Computer. I really outwitted him! Outwitted Like A FOX! Yeah
it might have been automated and whatnot but STILL they knew one of my
passwords! Oh well such is life. Wait that's A Good Thing.
So, yeah HEY, GOING WELL! SUCH IS LIFE! On my last cup of
coffee. I think #4 overall (next best guess is #3). And I used
the microwave For All Of It Except Coffee #1. When Browing iTunes: THe
Music Service Called Apple Music, I see there's a new Reggae Man/Band named
Koffee. I came up with that name years ago! A story that will
last a life time.
WAIT A SECOND KOFFEE IS FEMALE... NOT JUST IN REAL LIFE BUT,
UPON FURTHER INTROSPECTION, EVEN IN MY STORY FALSEHOODS AS WELL. FOr
some reason I forgot that while browsing iTunes: The Apple Music Experience, and
then found out I was wrong, then realized oh yeah MINE was female, too!
The point is A Story That Will Last A Life Time. I guess.
I had a solid 6 or 8 songs on my CREATIVE NOMAD MP3 PLAYER in high school by
Bob Marley: The Reggae Experience. BEAT THAT, LADY KOFFEE. I
also had FIVE DOZEN OR SO Sublime Songs and they Borrowed From The Reggae
Experience in much of their oeuvre but also in their oeuvre (the
other definition of the word that doesn't exist but is was what I
USED to think Oeuvre means. Maybe you think it too. Anyway....)
Fascinating. I used to think Oeuvre meant style,
or brand, or sort of their thematic imprint. I think I was
most aware of the word from Cough Potato: By "Weird," Al Yankovert.
Anyway, I dunno. Having the Pizza for lunch! I was like ya know
what I WANT THAT PIZZA NOW and whose gonna stop me YOU? Not likely!
Anyway got 3 beers for tomorrow. Then 2 days Off Beer. Then Beer Is
Back In Action! Anyway, I dunno, what else is going on and crap. I
think I'm getting better at Plugging In Phone So The Wire Charger Doesn't Get
Too Twisted. It's only been Less Than A Week but so far so good!
I always pronounced Koffee, "Koh-Fi," and not, "Caugh-Ee" I dunno if I
was right or not! Like Kofi Annon.. wait a second... KOFI ANNON. Q
ANON... I FUGIRED OUT WHO Q IS SToP THE PRESSES!
Well that seems about right, huh? What if
it turns out Q is black. Would they all be like oops never mind.
Thought it was a White Thing. We'll Carry on with life as we did before,
Our Bad! Second Guess for, "Q," is Gerald Furkowski. Third guess
is, "Weird," Al Yankovert. How come Weird Al hasn't put out an album since
2014. What, is he stupid or something? Doesn't he know we enjoy his
music and comedy and persona? Man he must be REALLY DUMB to not put out a
Quarantine Album to get us all Happy And Feeling Good. Then again I
know maybe THREE SONGS since 2014. But still! People Find Music
from listening to Weird Al! We hear The WEird Al Version and then find
Real Life Versions! Anyway, I dunno. Let's see, three songs in 6
years... I feel like there was TWO Eminem songs.. well, at least ONE... Hmm...
That narrows it down to 2 more songs.. uh... Popular Music!
It's my Dream to One Day Listen To Every Song, Watch Every TV
Show And Movie, And See Every Comic. I figure I got a good 40, 50 years to
follow through on that. I'll get there eventually! May even only
take me 10, 15 years! Then the rest of life is All Just Chill. Is
there a decent chance I have more beer today? Sure! Will I? I
dunno, I just told you! Hey Pizza How Bout That. I dunno.
What kind of person buys into the idea that Everyone They've Ever Heard Of Is A
Pedophile. The kind of person hwo has Pedophilia On The Brain. Like
Batman. QANON People Are Pedophile Batmen. Well wouldn't that
mean they were a victim of pedophilia at a foramtive age. Yeah, maybe!
In which case, they should get psychiatric help! Maybe this IS their
form of psychiatric help. Then they're kinda screwed!
Maybe watching Leprechaun is MY Form of Psychiatric Help!
Yeah I never said it wasn't No Secret There. Hey it's the last
paragraph. Another Entry In The Books. Back to Basics of watching
Leprechaun when this entry is over. The point is I always feel great 2-4
days into Super Market Delivery when I'm emptying out the Fridge and Freezer
pretty well. After being Shamed for using too much space when Delivery
Arrives. Also I get to finally start having those frozen meals I like so
much. I have to have Fresh Meals I LIKE first, or they'll go bad!
Then I get to have Frozen Meals I REALLY LIKE, and all is right with the
universe. I'll see you guys later.
August 1, 2020
I Feel Fine
like writing Titles the Night Before Entries over the last few weeks has really
been paying off. It gives me CONTEXT to DREAM IN. Had some great
DREAMS based on last night's (Today's) Titles. 1) I was throwing a never
ending party in what in reality is my Uncle's house. It was like I was
throwing a Great Party this one night, but with the premise being also this
is never gonna end I'm hosting a great party indefinitely. So I guess
it's like a Club. A Club is a never ending party. There's admission
fee to this party. So basically it's a club. But anyway then
the authorities shut me down for some reason (Partying Too Hearty?) and put me
in a mental institution. The next thing I remember was hmm it suddenly
turns out I've been in this institution for a YEAR man does time fly But Also
I'd Kind Of Like To Leave Now.
Other thing I dreamt Right Before Waking Up was looking
at Polls. Real life polls! An accurate replica of where the polls
have been over the last week, but in my dreams. And doing calculations.
Like ok if Biden doesn't win Pennsylvania, like there's a 15% chance he
might, there's all these states where he's like 45% to win... he can win one of
those... and basically Crunching The BattleGround States Numbers.
Without knowing Why. Or being able to stop. Then I woke up and I was
finally like Alright I'm done with math now for a while at least! So
Anyway the point is I woke up and now In Real Life THE AIR CONDITIONING that
was FIXED last night is now ON THE FRITZ again!
I think the narrative around Biden choosing a VP is kind
of... weird. It's all framed oh this group wants this VP, this other
group is lobbying for this VP... Shouldn't the story be BIDEN WANTS THIS
VP SO THAT'S WHO HE PICKS. I mean what do you think its gonna be like
After Election. Is every issue that comes up this faction wants Biden
to act this way, this other faction wants Biden to act that way... LOOK LET
BIDEN ACT HOW HE WANTS TOA CT. Then we can debate it! I may not
always agree with him but When You're President You Kinda Need to Lead, not
Follow. Or get out of the way. In which case, him getting out
of the way, that leads us back to his VP choice! Once Biden is out of the
way VP is in charge!
Anyway. Anyway in Dodgeball the movie instead of the
Dodgeball competition's slogan being Go Balls Deep! it should have been
Dodgeball: Lead, Follow, Or GET OUT OF THE WAY!
If you can get out of the way of a wrench, you can get out of the way of a ball.
Also, leading and following are clear metaphors for Throwing A
Ball At People and Catching A Ball Thrown By Someone Else, respectively.
It ADDS UP TOO MUCH! Anyway had some communal meat loaf for dinner
last night. That's two communal dinners 2 nights in a row! And if I
had it my way I'd have some Communal Pasta tonight but I don't see that
happening so oh well what can ya do! Also I need a better way to
conceptualize Joe Biden. Is he Uncle Joe? Father Joe? Step
Father Joe? Is he a Doc Brown to our Marty McFly? Is he an
Aging-Football-Coach-Al-Pacino to our Flash-In-The-Pan-Quarterback-Hot-Doggin-Jamie-Foxx?
That sounds about right! Also this applies specifically to my
generation/close-by generations. But my generation and close by
generations are important for some reason no one is really sure of!
Anyway first sip of beer for that commencing... now.
Hey I just took a sip of beer! That was fun. I was just watching
The Simpsons episode where it's a parody of Mary Poppins and there's a line of
dialogue In A Song where Bart is like Can I Be A Boozehound? [makes sense to
ask that in context] and Homer is like Not Till your Fifteee......
And I was always pretty sure he was saying Fifteen based on Context but
it always sounded like FIFTY to me. The point is when I had that on
VHS there were no closed captioning, but watching it now On Computer with Closed
Captioning, yep Fifteen. Also I always have closed captioning on.
I like to READ I'm an INTELLECTUAL. I'm reading the novelized version of
each Simpsons episode because I'm An ERUDITE Adult! Hey that word is
relatively close to what I imagined. Close enough!
Fascinating. There was that book about Post Office
which I believe was called Post Office and I believe was written by Gerald
Furkowski. Wait LMLTURQ. Yep checks out book called Post
Office By Gerald Furkowski. And anyway they make post office
workers seem like the worst of the worst of the worst people. And I always
had some trouble buying it. That they're always stealing mail and throwing
mail out and Probably Other Stuff With Our Mail I Don't Remember. But
anyway Furkowski may be doing Satire I dunno there's no way of knowing.
And in real life, I've never had a problem Getting Mail. I've never had a
problem getting mail to other people. So the point is I'm PRO Post Office
and ANTI Those Who Would Denigrate Said Post Office.
It's hard to conceptualize Post Office Issue because is it
like They're Sabotaging Post Office so that people have to use Private Delivery
Services and pay money to them? Or is it because they wants to sabotage
mail in voting. IT CAN'T BE BOTH! THAT'S TWO COMPLICATED. So
basically Each Thing Cancels The Other One Out and I guess there's just nothing
we can do about it! Even worse, there's probably Third and Fourth Reasons!
Imagine if Trump Ran On That Platform in 2016. In Future Retrospect The
THing I Will Be Most Successful At Is RUINING THE USPS! And then
Trumpists, they're like, YEAH THE POSTAL SERVICE HAS HAD IT TOO GOOD FOR TOO
LONG. I'M SICK OF USING IT ALL THE TIME AND IT BEING INSANELY
RELIABLE, CONVENIENT, CHEAP, AND FAST!
Someone's Gotta Do It
point is if you asked me is Jamie Foxx an actor or a Band Name I would
say... well, obviously an actor. I've known about him for over 2
decades! And other people have known him for over 2 AND A HALF decades!
But the point is hey it's time for part II of the entry. I feel like Jamie
Foxx was one of the leads in that movie about Booty Calling. I wanna say
Booty Call. He's the one who wraps himself up completely in Saran Wrap
because That's What He Thinks Safe Sex Is. Booty Call has taken a whole
new meaning this past decade Am I Right? Probably! I've made that
pun roughly a third of a decade ago Sure What Of It! Anyway, gonna
start Beer #2. Is there a thing where its like a riff where it goes
There's no such thing as safe sex! You're always taking a risk. For
example...I dunno exactly HOW that riff goes, but the first 2
sentences Sounds Like It Could Be The Start of Something.
Another weird aspect of the Biden VP Search is that The Biden
Team Themselves sort of set it up to be like a spectator sport. They go
out of their way a few months ago to say Yep Definitely A Lady! Who
will it be? We don't know! And if we DID know... Still Not Tellin!
And then sit back while the Spectators Begin To Sport. Not 100% sure why
the politics behind that is Good. I'm sure they have their reasons!
Well, relatively sure! There's a high probability they have their reasons!
Anyway I'm in favor of, Elizabeth, "Warren," as VP. I was watching The
Conjuring Movies and the Married Duo (Also In Reality Not Just Movie
Franchise!), their last name was Warren. And I think we NEED a VP
who knows how to fight Ghosts. A reallll ghost buster. I'd vote for
Ernie Hudson but for some reason Team Biden decided to tease their potential VP
pick with eliminating over 50% of presumptive nominees. Like Ernie Hudson.
I 100% get the idea and am behind it 70% of the way Of Picking A Female over a
Male. But why turn it into a Guessing Game? Or a Spectating Sport?
The point is Thank God there was that female reboot of Ghostbusters!!!
NOW WE HAVE FOUR GHOSTBUSTER POTENTIAL VPS. See, I knew Reboot would
Pay Off In The Long Run!
E.W. would be my Favorite pick To BE a VP, but I get that
politically she could be a liability. Everyone can just transfer their
illogical distaste for Clinton onto Warren. Because they're both old white
ladies. Sounds about right. Plus they've been demonizing Warren
for a few years. Thehy haven't been demonizing Other People for a few
years. And it sucks that we may have to decide something politically based
on Other People's Demonizing but That's JUST WHY WE NEED A GHOST BUSTER.
Biden Warren 2020 Don't Cross The Streams. Anyway gonna start beer #2
REALLY right about now. I like alternating between 3 and 4 beers
instead of just Always 3. It makes it so I only have beer 5 out of 7 days
of th week instead of 6. But boy oh boy does it.... uhh... Oh, right...
There's no such thing as safe sex! You're always taking a risk. For
example, have you ever... considered... uhh... BIDENWARREN2020.
Jeez. Figure I'll have Late Lunch during next
section of entry. What'll it be?!? Finish Salmon with rice?
Very likely! Sandwich with rice? Next most likely! A third
thing? That's a POSSIBLE PLURALITY of likely! Here's my pitch for
Biden Campaign Slogan-- Biden 2024 Can'tHurtToPrepare. It reminds
people that hey Biden probably WILL be alive and kicking four years from now!
That's good to know! Pretty sure that's an accurate Phrase.
Alive AND KICKING. One can only speculate on Why and What That Means
And Also Why Not. Or one could LIURQ. Sure why not.
"Live and Kicking was originally used by Fishmongers Hawking their wares to
convince customers of their freshness and has been considered a cliche since
about 1850. The variant originated in the 1960s as a denial of someone's
reported death." So basically Joe Biden is A) Fresh Fish and B)NOT
Still alive, huh? Well, THAT'll Do! I'm a
single issue voter for 2020. Presumably like a solid plurality of voters.
The single issue being Dump Trump. Hey I get to take a break after
this paragraph! What kinda Horror Movie Opportunities are there out there
for me tonight. HOLEY MOLEY I can binge watch All The batmans I Care
About. BurtonPlus incarnation. NolanPlus(other Nolan) incarnation.
Hey that's great, just great. It's scary because it goes from Adequate To
Mediocre to Just Plain Bad Back Up To Good Then GREAT. It's a real
rollercoaster of emotions watching Batmen. Each emotion lasts about 2 hours.
Really gives the emotion some time to set in and make itself at home!
Anyway, one more paragraph for this section. Also
those aren't emotions? How Good Something Is Isn't An Emotion, Is It?
I wouldn't have thought so. But now that I think about it, maybe?
Anyway. Maybe Biden'll pick Kanye to be his VP. ITS CALLED
TRIANGULATION ASK JAMES CARVILLE ABOUT IT!!! Sure I know about
politics. More or less! Anyway 2/3rds into Poochie Episode of
Simpsons. Finish that up tomorrow CircleWalk! Figure that's a universally
regardeded great episode, right? Don't have a cow, man! What
does that mean. Oh. That's exactly what that guy peddling those
magic beans said to me! Oh. Ugh. He wants my cow.
I have a cow currently. He Wants To Change All That. Alright I'll
be back in a bit.
Are Looking Up
having (UN)frozen pizza for lunch! The Plurality Strikes Again! I
feel like I'm in the plurality of people who Enjoy the word plurality as well as
the concept of plurality. Maybe just a striaght Majority.
Depends if I Dunno and if I Don't Care are optoins.
Actually, neither way. With thoseoptions I Dunno and/or I Don't
Care are bound to have plurality. In other cases, when you can only
choose Yes I Like That or No I Don't, majority is gonna be yeah
I'm, "Down," with pluralities! Anyway first time I'm having Its
Digiorno, Not Delivery! from Microwave. I'd use Oven but Parents are not
on board with oven on account of it potentially makes The Outside Of The Oven
Hotter. Maybe a little bit. I guess. Tastes fine just fine
Jeez. I think the main part of Me Constructing a
Party Central was I spent the afternoon buying good furniture. And then
when night came, when Party initially commenced, the furniture was All Great and
the Electronics were new and great and people were like Man this couch is
something. In retrospect it's like The Sims if we thought The Sims was
Real Life. Anyway, I Dunno. I started re-watching the Linda
Carentil..innni... the lady from Freaks & Geeks Horror movie about the
Mexican Lady Ghost and it's a snooze! I've seen it before! And it wa
a snooze then! Tried watching it last nght. Still A Snooze!
The point is I Got Over All My Fears thanks to this movie! I realized that
ghosts aren't scary they're a snooze! That's the lesson my life has
been trying to teach me for 31.5 years.
There must be some Obvious Ladies who could be VP that we
haven't thought of yet. And then as soon as we collectively think of it
Biden is like YEP YOU GOT IT! TOOK YOU A WHILE BUT YOU GOT THERE.
Hmm. Who could it be?!?!? Anyway I just finished my (UN)frozen
pizza but on the plus side it was delicious! I think I've been thinking
about VP in terms of who could help/hurt Joe Biden Electioning Chances.
But there's So Much More to picking a VP! Like, who should be elevated
to future Presidential Candidate more than other people? Or, maybe,
who gets along with Joe Biden? And if that's the case, c'mon WE
DON'T KNOW! ONLY YOU KNOW THAT. JUST TELL US WHO YOU GET ALONG WITH!
YOU COULD END ALL THIS NONSENSE.
Will I have Part II of III Frozen Pizza tonight?
No, I won't. Sure it'll be delicious but c'mon. Haven't
watched a DVD in 2 or 3 days. Nothings stopping me from continuing that!
Fascinating. Joe Biden was in his 20's when Dick Van Dyke was
originally aired. Sounds about right. Great Grandpa Joe.
maybe that could be Joe Biden's thing. He will teach my generation about
Sitcoms from when he was younger. And how they inspired the sitcoms that
we enjoy. Both now, and when we were younger. We all like
sitcoms but this guy knows more about original sitcoms than we could ever dream
of! Why isn't there Exactly One More Biteful of Pizza! And then,
if I ate that, why isn't there Exactly One MORE Biteful of Pizza?
I dunno. Last paragraph! What a fun entry.
One more paragraph to go! Finished Beer #2 of (3? or 4?) and have #3
poured out into a glass. I will Commence Enjoying That right about....
now. I wI wouldn't wanna be president. I bet ALL THE GHOSTS live
at the White House. Is it weird sleeping in the same room (Bed?) as Past
Presidents. It's like being Roommates Throughout Time. You live at
the white house, yeah The Time Doesn't Match, but its like being suitemates with
All Them Other Presidents. Who are ghosts now. Except for the living
ones. At least the ones who aren't Jimmy Carter. He shows up now and
then because He Doesn't Know He's Still Alive. Not sure what political
point I was trying to make there. Not sure about a lot of things!
I'll see ya later!