Sunday, May 31, 2020

Take A Walk?  Turns Out Not.

    Aw shucks.  Hello friends for the final entry of May.  We're talkin' the 31st entry in a fuckin' month.  I deserve some sort of Website Award.  But don't take it from me.  Take it from Yourself For Agreeing!  I implore you to agree.  That's how I feel.  Anyway was planning on starting taking walks again today, per extensive research of Talking To My Brother And Him Saying It Should Be Okay Even With Elderly HouseMates, and my parents signed off last night, but Mom changed her mind!  Oh well I guess it's another few weeks without the pleasure of Not walking In a 4 Feet Radius Circle!
    The good news is I started re-watching The Frighteners for the first time in years.  It's a fine movie, just fine.  I was thinking about it being rated R and I was like, c'mon Kids Would/Do Love This Movie.  What's so, "R," about it.  Kids know that people die.  Kids know that there are good ghosts and bad ghosts and sometimes the bad ghosts succeed in killing people!  But ultimately the good ghosts, teamed up with teh good living, win in the end!  And also Gary Busey Has Offspring who play Bad Ghosts c'mon they learn this crap in Nursery School.  Anyway.  I never realized how much of a brazen jerk Michael J Fox is in the movie.  If you don't know, he plays a guy who can see and talk to ghosts, and they're good ghosts, but he basically cons people by having the good ghosts haunt good decent folk and then he shows up, has them stop, and gets paid in the process.
    But anyway once the haunting starts the good ghost hands a Business Card for Michael J Fox's Character's phone number.  And they're not thinking OH WONDERFUL WHAT SERENDIPITOUS LUCK THAT WE FIND OUT ABOUT THIS GUY RIGHT NOW AT THIS MOMENT.  No its more like Obvious Extortion.  Gotta haunting problem there do ya well what a coincidence Here's my number..  I was young and naive and not well versed in the concept of Michael J Fox not being a 100% good guy, but oh well what can ya do.  Anyway, woke up pretty late today.  Possibly on account of thinking yea I don't need to abide by my Last 2 and 1/2 Month Routine, Walking Outside is gonna mix things up a bit!  Turns out I Was Wrong just like Social Distortion predicted.  Anyway.  I'm scared to catch up on the news right now but all I can say is If We Live In A Police State Who Will State The Police?  Also not 100% why peaceful protesters need to be confronted by dozens of police at every turn in the first place.  Not 100% on lots of things!
    Anyway if you haven't caught up on things most (almost all?  ALL?) of the ultraviolence is being done by white people.  We're talkin' White Supremacists.  We're talking White Anarchists.  We're talkin' White Jerks Looking For A Laugh.  We're talkin' White Dummies Who Think They're Helping.  The whole spectrum of Shitty White People!  Well, the dummies who think they're helping, that's not shitty in and of itself.  It's just them being dumb.  But the point is I'm Not Sure What It Means but there's something interesting in Most Serious Protests In A Long Time In America happening While We're Mostly Under Quarantine.  I dont know what it means.  I don't know to what benefit or detriment it is.  I don't know how one thing effects or impacts the other.  But there's somethin' there, right?  That'd be my guess!
    I dunno.  I was ready to take a walk man oh man.  Mom changed her mind!  And I calmly argued (debated is more like it!) with her about it for 10 minutes until I was like fine I'll wait a few more days.  Weeks.  A month or two.  It's your life possibly at risk I'll let you win this Debate.  Cool!  Finally had that Spaghetti with meatballs last night.  And will Finally Finish It for lunch today.  That's My Kinda Luck.  Good dinner!  Having more the next day!  In normal times c'mon lets get somethin' new but in these times hey only have Real Nice Dinners once in a while might as well enjoy it a 2nd time the next day!  I saw that Mcdonalds commercial again.  Now I don't like it.  First time I was glad to see McDonalds back in public consciousness.  2nd time?  Alright now you're going too far!

Hug The Police Hug The Police Hug!

      Idea for a Lullaby Kids-Version Cover of NWA.  Anyway the white people rioting doing Violence isn't the worst of it, its the Police doing Violence, Often (almost always?  ALWAYS?) Completely Unprovoked!  It's a protest against police violence and the police have responded with more violence.  What's the endgame to that.  I dunno have you tried Hugging The Police?  A nice Hug will melt the heart o the most hardened Racist Authoritarian Policeman.  Or they'll shoot our your eye with rubber bullets.  I'm no psychic how am I supposed to know.  The one positive thing is Based On My Imagination it seems like most people in the country's opinions skew on the Right Side Of Things.  And if I can imagine that, imagine what YOU... they... hey imagining is fun.  Maybe this whole thing is a Deep Fake and the monsters from Stephen King's The Mist are roaming the streets outside we have no fuckin' clue!
    Anyway.  Just started a new French Vanilla Coffee Creamer advetised as No Fat!  Isn't Cream Fat?  Isn't that the definition.  Lemme look that up right quick.  Looks about accurate.  I guess it's Mock Creamer.  I think legally they're allowed to sell it that way without making that distinction clear WHERE ARE THE POLICE TO SAVE US FROM THAT?  We need to be policing Food Products Nutritional Values, not PEACEFUL PROTESTS.  And that's the bottom line!  Hmm wonder what's going on out there in the mist.  Hopefully What We Think Is Happening.  That's my hot take!  Maybe I'm a Deep Fake.  Probably not, tough.  But, then again, even if I was, would I know it? Uh oh!! 
    No monsters outside my window.  Unless they're invisble AND silent.  No protests, either.  And no police!  Nice sunny day in the neighborhood PRESUMABLY.  Hey good news that's what's going on in 90% of the country.  And in another 9.75% it's a shitty day outside but only in the same ways it usually is!  Sometimes I pop a couple of Tic Tacs and I can hardly recognize the person I used to be when I could suck on a Tic Tac to completion, when its fully melted.  I pop a couple of tic tacs there's NO WAY I don't end up chomping on them at some point.  I try to hold out as long as possible but there's a zero chance I make it to the end.   
    Right?  Sure.  What percent of ManCream is fat.  I'm guessing Some Of It.  Does Semen have calories?  Let's get Neil DeGrasse Tyson working on that one.  Or Bill Nye.  I like Bill Nye more than Neil De Grass Tyson.  And I have a neutral-positive opinion on Neil DeGrasse Tyson.  It's just that Bill Nye I like a little more.  Not even accounting for Nostalgia reasons.  Just rubs me the right way A Little Bit More.  Tyson is probably a smarter and a Higher Level Scientist.  But they're both pretty smart that's how I feel.  And the good news is we don't need to choose one or the other we live in a world where both Neil DeGrasse Tyson and Bill Nye exist.  But no one else.  We need more Sciententertainers.  That's my Hot Take on Culture.  That's Scientist-Entertainers.  Not Scientology-Entertainers.  We've got enough of them!
    Anyway last paragraph of the section.  My brothers gettin' into computer programming!  Anyway.  His first 1/2 year at NYU he was majoring in Math presumably to become a teacher.  Then he transferred to Film School and got a degree in Dramatic Writing.  Then he went to Law School.  Then he worked in politics-adjacent things.  Now he's onto Computer Science.  See, Doing Nothing Makes A Lot More Sense Now, Doesn't It?  Why do something for a while and then just start over.  Why not just start Starting Over at Zero and then every few years Start Over at Zero Again so You Don't Even Need To Make Any Changes!  Anyway.  Gonna take another break now.  See ya in a bit!

No One Knows How Anything Ever Will Turn Out

    That's my hot take!  Anyway it's a good thing the worst my imagination can muster is The Monsters From The Mist.  Cause otherwise I'd be really scared and worried!  Anyway first time I've had homemade spaghetti Heated Up The Next Day and I can safely say It Tastes Better Than Italian Restaurant Spaghetti The Next Day.  The sauce is what makes it!  It's 1/2 Bolognese Sauce 1/2 Regular Spaghetti Sauce.  Talk About Your Perfect Proportions!  I need to look into what exactly Rubber Bullets are.  Hey You Just Shot Me!  Its okay the bullet was made out of rubber!  Yeah it still exploded my eye and now I'm half blind.  It's okay it's just Pretend Bullets! 
    I dunno what's going on.  Hopefully people will find a way to de-escalate the police (its somehow probably on people to de-escalate what the police themselves are escalating, I dunno)... with the absolute condition that we seriously and extensively address the concerns and demands for justice that started the Peaceful Protests in the first place.  And also lets start a process of holding Police Caught On Camera Illegally Using Force to justice.  Because I get the sense there's dozens and dozens* of video out there clearly showing identifiable policepeople breaking the law.  Seems like that should be addressed too, right?  If we police people, who will people police?  Ugh.  That's all I got for now!  Stay Safe!  Stay Strong!  Stay Inside!  Well last one is just my suggestion for myself.  I'll see ya later.

-3:48 P.M. 

Saturday, May 30, 2020

Alright!  Let Phase Negative Two Of NYC Reopening Commence!

    Also, there's a Phase Zero.  Just for some extra context.  Phase Zero.  Not a bad name for a bad band.  It's a bad name for a good band.  But it's a fine name for a bad band!  Bad bands need good bad band names or else people would get confused.  Hmm, see, it's happening right now!  Anyway my life has been saved by Tom Goes To The Mayor over the last 36 hours.  I love it!  And then after that presumably I can binge watch Awesome Show Great Job.  And then after that I could put a bullet in my brain!  Hmm that went to a place I wasn't intending.  Good news though We're only THREE PHASES AWAY FROM NYC STARTING TO REOPEN.
    The first thing I'm gonna do when things are re-opened enough to my liking is go outside.  I dunno what you're planning.  To me going outside is the natural first step.  Kinda the only step.  I was reading a WebMD article about how people are having a large increase in nightmares, with the most common thing having to do with Bugs.  An they're like hey whey we colloquially call Virus Bugs maybe that's why.  And it made me think about how 2 out of 3 nights over the last few months I dream about smoking cigarettes.  Cause That's Bad For Respiratory Stuff Too!  And Also 100 other things i could mean but Hey Whose Got The Time!
    I'm kinda surprised looting wasn't a thing over the last few months.  Looting in the sense of having the goal of accumulating value and wealth, seems like you'd have a wide open window so to speak.  But good for you, society, to not seeing society break down completely!  Anyway.  Important stuff-- lunch will most likely either be a Bagel with Creamed Cheese or 2 Hot Dogs and a Soup.  Hot Dogs weren't even on my radar but they played prominently in a Tom Goes To Some Mayor Episode and I was like hmm I like the sound of that.  But the point is in retrospect I probably could have gotten away with some looting, but either way, I value the health of my family more than any material goods that I could keep As Is or exchange for money in some future Pre-Mad-Max scenario where society has resumed but BEFORE society has gone to putt even worse later on.
    What's a thing you can put your Money in that is most likely to remain valuable after Society Breaks Down Completely.  Paper money?  Who gives a shit.   Gold?  It's useless!  Oil?  You're paying more than its worth to hold it!  I say stock up on Cereal and powdered Ice Tea.  Better than nothing, right?  Hmm you could Re-Establish some sort of Money-for-goods-and-services type system but you can Start From Scratch so American Money is useless.  Or, lets face it, we can and MUST go back to a bartering system.  It's fair It's FUN and it's FEASIBLE!  Only thing I insist on is, if we go back to a pre-modern system of finance, or adapt a pre-modern way into something new, we must stop paying butchers so much.  I've made this point several times-- I think Butchers were overpaid specifically in Rural Czarist Russia and I'm not just gonna stand by and watch Butchers Fleece the Rest Of Us!
    Who the fuck had the idea for Musicals.  Hey you know how great Plays Are?  Imagine if they were about a group of people who always broke into song-- well crafted, well sung, well instrumented song.  Like, was the first musical actually that-- not a gimmick to make a play more entertaining, but just a play about people who break into song?  That seems like a logical first step, because otherwise I don't see how you make the leap from Macbeth to. OOOO GIVE ME ONE LAST KISS!  IT NEVER FELT LIKE THIS!  For some reason I remember my Dad enjoying Bye Bye Birdie.  Maybe that's why I wanted to be a Rock 'n Roll star.  Also, the one time I bought my Dad a gift without it being reciprocal, was in 2008 for his birthday, and I got him a DVD of Bye Bye Birdie, but it turns out is was a Remake with Jason Alexander (Not as Birdie, c'mon, but as some other guy) and it also turned out he didn't have a way to play DVDs.  But it's the thought that counts!
    That's gotta be a thing that's happened, right?  People taking Shakespeare and making it into a Musical?  Probably ironically and it's supposed to be silly?  It must have been attempted, at least.  Or at least thought of? There's been billions of people who know about Shakespeare and at least one of them must have been like yea good idea musical for laughs.  Otherwise, I'm a geeennnius.  Let's get Lin Manuel Miranda on that.  He seems like he'd do a good job with it.  Anyway.  Ezra Pound was all like Yeah Shakespeare was good but CHAUCER NOW WE'RE TALKIN'!!!  That's something worth being aware of.  I read several pages of How To Read or whatever that book was called, and I didn't absorb anything useful in regards to How To Read, but I did absorb Yeah Pound likes Chaucer a lot and Shakespeare is ok but he's all about Chaucer.  Gotta assume that'll come up sooner or later, right?  Anyway, spaghetti never happened last night.  Probably tonight.  I'll be back in a bit.
 

Let Phase Negative Ninety Seven Of No More Racism Commence!

     I hope we're moving in the right direction!  Also I hope it's allowed to skip stages!  Maybe they want us to go -97,-96,-95... FUCK THAT I'm SKIPPING AHEAD TO NEGATIVE THIRTY.  We'll get there yet!  Anyway I just realized I've been talking about these protests and I Have no idea what they're really doing.  And I assume a large majority of white people who are re-acting to this one way or another just know Hmm protests going on I'LL LET MY IMAGINATION FILL IN THE REST!!!  And I'm pointing that out as a bad thing but I am guilty of it, too!  I don't even know if I watched the CNN Crew being arrested.  I feel like I might have seen a few seconds.  But besides that I'm just going on MY IMAGINATION.  Which is maybe where Racism comes from!  You don't know people so you let your imagination run wild!  Often being consciously shaped by Racists Who Already Exist.  Dats how it spreads.  Fascinating.  WHAT YOU GOTTA PROBLEM WITH MY IMAGINATION NOW?  No, I don't, you clearly do, though!
    Jeez.  And I'd say there's a solid 75% chance even Trump hasn't seen any of the protests.  Especially when he tweeted Threats Of Killing them.  I think its way more likely he said that with just his imagination of what's going on and acted on those instincts, rather than being on top of the situation and thinking strategically how to, from his point of view, "stop violence" [well his real strategy is obviously to fan the flames on purpose, but you get the point].  I dunno whatta world we live in.  WE MUST STOP THESE PEACEFUL PROTESTERS FROM USING VIOLENCE BY KILLING THEM!  IT'S THE ONLY WAY BASED ON MY VERY VERY VERY LIMITED AND CORRUPTED IMAGINATION!!!  Hail to the chief!
    Conrad Birdie would know how to fix this.  He'd break into song and get everyone happy.  Not enough talk about how Conrad Birdie stole all his music from black musicians.  IsIs it just me or does Bye Bye Birdie sound like a threat?  Like you're making a cool Action Hero Line (whether as a hero or a villian) Bye Bye Birdie and then you pull the trigger and leave behind you in your wake 200 crying teenage girls from the early 1960's.  Anyway I saw a McDonalds Quarantine Commercial and I realized been a while since I've seen a McDonalds commercial.  For some reason that's one riff I remember from David Cross.  Some HBO special he did in the 90's and he's making a joke about McDonalds not needing to advertising and he's like yes, we know, you're the folks who make hamburgers.  It's funny because of word choice.  Folks.  Folks who make hamburgers.  I get it!
    Alright 10th paragraph.  Figure I'll take a break, probably have lunch locked and loaded ready to go for next section of entry.  Cuomo said Phase I of re-opening starts on June 8th.  Not sure if that was NYState or NYCity.  Either way that's in about a week.  Also not sure if I'm just gonna abide by whatever Cuomo says.  I'd listen to the experts not the politicians That's MY Hot Take.  I don't think I've ever seen either Bye Bye Birdies.  Anyway. It's a musical about an Elvis Figure Who Goes To War just like The Actual Elvis Figure Did Or Something.  Good idea for a re-imagining of Tom Goes To The Mayor.  Tom Goes To War.  And the Mayor is now his Commanding Officer and They're in Iraq or Afghanistan every episode and get into some stupid and wacky adventures.  About on par with Musical Shakespeare.  I'll be back!  I tink we're technically not at war with Iraq anymore.  Lemme look that up right quick.  Yeah not technically but still pretty much yeah.  I'll be back! 
     

The Time For Action Is Over!  Now Is The Time For Talk!

    Wait I might be mixed up on that one, I dunno, I'll look it up right quick and get back to you on that.  Anyway, last section of entry.  Lunch is 2 hot dogs, 1 piece of bread, and 4 chicken nuggets.  And also I had one Cookie!  Whattaworld.  Also just remembered 101K & Counting CoronaDeaths.  Also just remembered I have to cook spaghetti for tonight.  Alright that's not so bad at least I get to eat spaghetti afterwards.  Also until just now I didn't realize how widespead protests are going on across America.  Something Big is happening!  And I'd be out there on the front lines if only I couldn't risk brining home CoronaVirus.  I dunno, that might be accurate.  Over the last few years I've considered Here and There to protest for something.  Might as well have been this that actually was it.  Also in retrospect I saw on twitter or something they were protesting in Union Square.  Which I took to mean, and still do, New York Union Square.  But I didn't really conceptualize oh this is a big thing going on.  Also another reason I would STRONGLY consider protesting-- I love union square!  I went lived within blocks of it for a solid 1 and 1/2 years!  If you wanna feel comfortable in your ProtestSpace, and believe me, you do, for me it can't get better than Union Square.
    I feel like it's hard to separate Race Relations from Age/Generations.  Because it's sort of when saying Racism Is Fucked Up its sort of implied that Previous Generations Have Failed Us.  We don't live in a point in history where Racism suddenly popped up.  And I think young people legitimately hold ill will to older generations, whether they're conceptualizing it or not, as having failed us and now we're responsible for making it better but we're young we don't know!  And also for the most part You're The Ones Still In Power You Racism Failures!  Whattaworld Whattaworld.  Yeah it was a tiny cookie with my lunch.  Tiny little chocolate chip cookie.  30 Calories. What of it.  You got a problem with my cookie consumption?  Why don't you Say It To My FACE YOU COWARD.
    Well, great, I dunno.  Hey in 2 days I can go back to Crazysheet Classic-- White Font On Black Background.  Its good to have solid things to look forward to in life.  Right?  Probably.  Anyway.  What's the jury say on me not wanting to watch George Floyd Video or other similar videos.  Should I watch it, no matter how uncomfortable, because Everyone NEeds To See This?  Or am I justified in being like nope don't wanna see it I get the jist already.  Am I getting the gist?  I dunno!  I saw a Still Image of it!  I think I can extrapolate what happened based in it.  OH I saw like 5 seconds.  I remember hearing Mr. Floyd saying he couldn't breathe.  Then I turned it off cause I was like ok now 5 seconds I REALLY got the jist.  Maybe I didn't, though.
    Anyway.  On the plus side I just had a sense memory of a scene(s) in The Wire where the street drug dealer is advertising his drug by its name, calling out to who evers around, Pandemic, Got That Pandemic!  That was the name for Heroin they had at that stage in their drug dealing.  And there's nothing funny about pandemics but now that we're in one calling a specific iteration of Heroin, "Pandemic," just sorta made me smile.  I'm a weird guy.  They also called it, "Got that WMDs!" which I'm sure is more memorable from other people who watch it.
    Maybe its just me with the Generational thing.  Its sort like c'mon you handed us this fucked up world, you refuse to give us political power to change it for the better, and, what, how are we supposed to feel empowered? What the hell are we supposed to do?  The point is the entry is almost over.  The good news whatever uneasiness you feel in society right now, it's gonna be 100x worse in October before the election I bet.  That may be Trump's only play, right?  Not just to stoke anger and division, but as an excuse to cancel election.  Seems plausable.  So let's start the process now of dealing with things, and preparing for that, so its not sprung on us and we're all in a really really fucked situation.  I'll see ya later!

-2:07 P.M.

Friday, May 29, 2020

I Hope I'm Taking Notes On This

    Sure I am.  It's All I'm Doing That's What THis Is.  Me Taking Notes On This In Real Time.  Anyway how about ZOOM.  I find it kind of reckless.  Slow and steady race, c'mon.  What notes do I got on that.  Not 100% what Zoom is.  I get the gist that its like FaceTime but with a square of people.  Either 2x2 or 3x3.  I guess 4x4 or 5x5.  That might be what my Dad is seeing when he teaches.  A 5x5 of Students.  I haven't checked it out because that violates privacy laws.  Also how did Zoom go from being This Isn't A Thing At All to being Ubiquitous with this technology and service. within a matter of hours.  I smell foul play!  Wait, no.  I Smell Foul.  ..Play!
    I like how America's billionaires (or a similar group, like, maybe the TOP billionaires, or even some 9 figure millionaires..._) increased their wealth by 15% over the last few months and we all lost our jobs.   That seems about right.  But its okay because I dunno no one is really sure Why That's Okay.  I think most people are just too tired to care and the rest of the people are like well I Know there's no way this is okay but who cares I'M BENEFITING WHEEEE!  HEY THIS IS THE BIGGEST HEALTH AND ECONOMIC CRISIS OF THE 21ST CENTURY LETS MAKE SURE BILLIONAIRES INCREASE THEIR WEALTH CONSIDERABLY BASED ON THIS SITUATION.
    There've been bigger Crisises in the 21st century not exclusively about health and/or economics.  Like, War!  Or genocide.  Or that time... uhh... this is where I'm supposed to make a joke... uhh... hmm... ehh.... eeee... oooohhh.... uhhhh... hmm....  ANYWAY.  What else is going on and crap.  Got some FreshDirect delivered just now.  We're talkin' I'm having a ROAST BEEF SANDWICH for lunch with a can of soup.  That's right some Nice Fresh Deli Meat.  Aren't meat packing plants the most CoronaContagious Places after Nursing Homes?  Yeah but that's for THEM.  They yell at each other and the virus propells through their sound waves.  It doesn't stick and live on the meat itself.  So basically I'm a hero by throwing them some more business they might make a one time extra .000001 cent based on my continued patronage!
    Apparently Cuomo of New York Governorship Fame sent sick Covid People BACK TO NURSING HOMES so they could re-infect more people.  I didn't read the story 100% BUT I DID click on the link a couple of times and READ SEVERAL PARAGRAPHS.  And And also something about granting Nursing Home Owners Immunity or something?  The point is he's no saint.  Very few people are.  Throughout history there's only been like a few dozen, I think?  And Sure Cuomo was well on his way to sainthood based on the last 2 months of looking competent to the untrained eye, but now all that's gone down the tube!  Also I think the story is he did a good job stopping NYSpread after a certain point which Is Good, but could have done more Way Ahead Of Time which would have stopped it from getting even close to this point.  Like I Said CLICK SOME LINKS READ SEVERAL PARAGRAPHS YOU CAN HAVE THIS KNOWLEDGE TOO!
    The bad news is, putting the necessary stuff that needed to be refrigerated and freezered, we had to take out one Almost Done carafe or whatever container of orange juice, and I was like FINE I'LL FINISH IT NOW.  But the Good News Is 20% into drinking it (MIXED WITH WATER!) I knocked the glass over and it all spilled on my floor.  ALRIGHT I DON'T HAVE TO DRINK THIS ORANGE JUICE AFTERALL.  And I LIKE orange juice don't get me wrong but... uhh... now that I think about it I want some orange juice RIGHT NOW.   I dunno what else is going on.  Mom and Pop decided to get some Meatballs.  Presumably to add to spaghetti.  Which presumably I'd have to spend 25 minutes of my life preparing.  But such is life.  I'll be back in a bit.

I'm The Default!

     I was thinking about how I was reacting to George Floyd in terms of hey wonder how white people will react/act to/on this.  But that's pretty faulty because Who Gives A Shit About White People lets see how African Americans react/act and do their best to get justice and create change.  White people can help but this isn't a story about White People.  White People will not be the heroes of this story now matter how much we want to do what's right.  So, I Was Wrong.  Good Social Distortion Song called, "I Was Wrong."  It's a great title because it's a pretty good catchall.  I was Wrong.  Hmm yep that just about covers it in 2 out of 3 of my situations.  But the point is Fuck Caring 2% more every year when something like this gains media coverage (I mean, it happens all the time, but I'm talkin' when we're forced to confront it once every 12-24 months), let's care 10 PERCENT MORE. 
    We'll never get to 100% but over time, hmm.  Let's see that math.  Let's say we started out caring 60%. Then the next time, +10%, we care 66%.  Then, next time after that, we care 73.2 I think?  Then the next time its 80.52...  The point is at some point we'll level off before 100%, I wish I knew where.  But that's My Struggle.  Hmm not a great phrase to use when talking about races.  Anyway looks like a great lunch is in store for me.  Possibly a great dinner, too!  Anyway what else is going on.  Can't we all just get it wrong.  Dunno what that means.  I do know Air Conditioning isn't working well.  It SOUNDS like its on, I can hear that there motor running.  No cool air coming out of vent, though!  And at the MainScreen where you can see LeftSide Is Current Temperature and RightSide Is Where I Want It, LeftSide Is Higher.  Not much I can do.  But that's My Struggle. 
    Has anyone made the point how it must suck having to protest during Pandemic?  That means I support protesters 200%, even the white ones are putting a little bit of themselves out on the line for it!  Good for us.  Them.  I'm not doing anything.  I'm writing a blog about it.  And saying about .1% of what needs to be said and in an irresponsibly irreverent tone.  That's My Str... alright you get the point.  I've eaten dozen of sandwiches over the last 2 and 1/2 months and Not Once have I heated Up The Meat.  I mean, I've had Frozen Sandwiches where the meat is heat..ed... up... but when making a turkey sandwich I never bother.  But this time?  Roast Beef?  Maybe I give it a shot.  I don't know what's going on either.
    I saw Jimmy Fallon is in trouble for doing Blackface in 2001 or something.  But It's Okay because An Entire Show Decided It Was Okay.  He wasn't some lone wolf!  The entire SNL Operation was like yup nothin' wrong with this!  So I guess no ones guilty in this situation.  The whole SYSTEM is guilty!  Yeah but it's too hard to Cancel An Entire System.  Where would we even start?  What if there were dumb people that thought the way to go was like We need to CANCEL The Minneapolis Police Department!  What If.  Anyway, I dunno.  Also, he was doing black face of 1 person in particular-- presumably a friend of his.  Presumably they reached out to Chris Rock and were like is this ok?  And presumably Chris Rock said no.  And then presumably Jimmy Fallon went Fuck you then I'm doing it anyway!
     How can you do an impression of a black man, as a white man, without wearing black face.  People would be confused.  Yeah he SOUNDS like him, is making similar poses and facial movements, but I DON'T GET IT ISN'T THIS OTHER GUY BLACK?  I'm HAVING SOME TROUBLE MAKING SENSE OF THIS.  Anyway, there are some days I'm fine with cooking in the evening and some days I don't really want to.  Today?  I Feel Like I'd Be Fine Doing That.  But it's still early yet I dunno!  I took a look at these meatballs we're talkin 2 Medium-Largish meatballs WTF.  My Mom and Dad were both like yea I'ma only have 2 with my spaghetti and I was like yeah I only want 3 so basically we've got enough meatballs for Three Family Spaghetti Dinners.  Fascinating.  I'll see ya in a little bit.

Dang Worthless Heir Conditioning

    One day I'd like to have a Male Heir that I could condition to be a Great Dude.  I also hope to have a Female Daughter who we would name [Wife's Name] Jr.  You never see that and I think it's about time we all see it together.  Julie Jr.  I'm marryin' someone named Julie in this scenario.  Not a bad name I think all other things being equal I'm fine with a Julie.  Also has there ever been any one who cheats with Blahblahblah The Third.  I mean, my name's Michael.  Can I just name my kid  Julius III.  Also I feel like in Rich Waspian places you might see The Thirds once or twice in your travels but I've never seen or heard of an American The Fourth.  My daughter's granddaughter will be Julie The Fourth.  LETS CELEBRATE IS HTE POINT!
    Stupid air conditioning.  I went up to the attic and changed the vents and now what's it worth.  Started re-watching Tom Goes II The Mayors' and I Am On Board!  So many laugh-em-ups.  Anyway.  The protests are specifically about getting justice for George Floyd so that the Police Man who Killed Him gets charger for murder, right?  Probably.  When you ask kids what they wanna be when they grow up, one of the default answers is POLICE MAN!  As a parent I feel its your responsibility to go, Well you better get started on your racism today!  It's a VERY tough job to do without racism in your bones!  I bet Firemen are racists, too.  Astronauts, too.  Meat packing plants?  Probably not racist, probably mostly minorities.  But if it was White People At Meat Packing Plants you better believe they'd probably be racist!
    You wouldn't think astronauts are generally racists because astronauts presumably have to be smart.  Oh how naive you are.  Nobody more racist than an astronaut!  Ugh.  Here's something in store if we don't start addressing Racism In The Positive Direction-- some white guy kills a black guy and just goes I WAS MAKING A CITIZEN'S ARREST!!!  I dunno if that qualifies as a joke-- that was the intention, but I dunno, I'm tired.  Just tired of it all.  What else is going on and crap. First Minneapolis, then what? MACROapolis?!?  WHERE DOES IT END?!  I'll be back in a little bit.   

New Idea-- Zoom Protests

    Just saw they arrested Cop who killed George Floyd.  Guess we can all go home now!  I dunno if I were there Doin It I'd stay doin it.  Lucky for protesters, though, demanding justice for George, they're doing it in the... Floyd... May Weather.  ITS A PORTMANTEAU OF PEOPLE'S NAMES GET ON BOARD OR GET OFF BOARD.  When I googled Floyd Mayweather, this came up 1st hit WRITTEN TODAY!!!

“Floyd Mayweather is being beaten up badly through 10 rounds by Marcos Maidana, but announcers say it is even. Two rounds left. “No way! Judges say Mayweather won. Investigation should take place. Fix?” said Trump on twitter in 2014.

     The point is Trump wants investigations into Boxing Matches but not Police Homicides.  Gotttemmmmmmm.  I dunno why they wrote the article today and not six years ago-- maybe they figured there'd be some confusion between George Floyd and Floyd Mayweather and were like well better re-up this article or write it from scratch we gotta get some Website Hits!!!  But I refuse to put out the name of the website I WILL NOT SUPPORT SUCH FRIVOLOUS FOOLISHNESS.  It looks like Trump's main pre-presidency era was just Wanting Investigations Into Black People for various things and reasons.  Oh, wait.  Now he's back around on it.  Obamagate.  He went a good few years avoiding investigations to himself, and focusing on investigating political opponents of misc backgrounds, and is now going back on the offensive against specifically black people! 
    I just had a bad thought about a possible future for Race Relations.  In about a week or two a black cop frivolously foolishly kills a black person for no good reason and then the minority of white people who are racist are like SEE EVERYONE DOES IT GET OVER IT!!!!  That makes me want to throw up partly because ya know that's kind of a plausible scenario.  Shouldn't the cops who arrested the CNN crew be fired immediately?  No oh this was wrong we regret it immediately!  You still did it.  It's done.  If no one faces consequences you've still sent the message out we will arrest and detain journalists on purpose.  Only way to rectify it is by firing them.  Pretty simple obvious course of action.  LOL BE BACK IN A BIT!!!!

I Guess Titles Are Worthwhiles

    Well what else is going on.  Lunch right now.  Soup is cheering me up.  Nice warm feeling.  Because the soup is warm.  Get a load of that!  I am!  Loads of Beef Barleys as well as Vegetables.  Anyway I know other people have looked into this before me but is there a Pet Cemetery type scenario where we can bring George Floyd back?  I remember in the original Pet Semetary the flashbacks of the wife's sister scared me, and I knew logically they were sisters, and it was a flash back, but I always thought of her as an old scary old lady scary.  Sort of in the same context of Bathtub Lady from The Shining.  One's a young lady with her whole life ahead of her presumably if it weren't for this spinal disease that eventually killed her presumably!
    My favorite part of sandwiches are the times when you get bites with no meat/any other filling of sandwich and its all bread all the time. Not only is it the joy of eating bread but its the joy of eating DOUBLE BREAD!  Anyway I dunno.  Whattado with the rest of the day.  Look into this June 8th this for New York Starting To Open Up.  See how that may or may not effect my plans.  Cook some Spaghetti Oh Well Gotta Do Somethin'.  Gettin' into watching these Interventions.  Boy I hope that Intervention Story I told recently about the person who was part of City High-- The Group That Made The Song What Would You Do was accurate and not just something I pieced together between several different episodes and/or dreams I've had.
    Last paragraph!  Looking back, I think I can safely say my favorite non-Eminem Rap Song of the Turn Of The Century was Nelly-- Ride Wit Me.  And another one in the top 5 would have been Ghetto Supastar --Aritsts I never knew but now appear to be Pras, Ol Dirty Bastard, and Mya.  Also, in retrospect, Ol Dirty Bastard is the funniest rap name I've ever heard.  And not like I'm laughing at Ol Dirty Bastard.  I'm laughing WITH Ol Dirty Bastard.  It's brilliant and I never even realized it.  Anyway, great, that'll do it for today.  What societal problems will I address tomorrow?  Eh probably should focus on my own problems.  I dunno.  Maybe I should address societal problems and society should address my problems.  You rub my back I'll rub one out sort of thing.  See ya later.

-2:27 P.M.

Thursday, May 28, 2020

You've Got My Whole Entry Ahead Of Us

    What's going on in the wide world of nothing  Watched the first 1 and 1/2 of the recent incarnation of I Spit On Your Grave! franchise.  Uh oh I'm like 60% into the 2nd one and she still hasn't had a chance to spit on their graves.  I'm starting to get worried.  But I have faith!  These are the movies where Women get raped and then inevitably Kill the rapists.  Fascinating.  I think when I was a teenager watching these movies were confusing because I liked nudity but obviously rape is not erotic.  But now I realize I like Revenge and seeing rapists get their comeuppance!  I think if you Spit On Your Rapists Graves' that might help with PTSD and other problems from being raped.  It's like well That settles that turns out I came out on top all things considered what else is going on.
    Hmm.  Fascinating.  Stories in the news about Black People getting discriminated against and/or KILLED by police for nothing.  I dunno maybe this time around people will care slightly more.  Each time it gets "Trending" (Not just on twitter but in the news/overall culture) maybe we get a little bit closer to conceptualizing it appropriately and maybe doing something about it?  That's my hope.  And it seems right!  I feel like each time people do seem to be taking it like 2% more seriously.  Which Is Terrible but actually Hey Better Than Nothing?  Which is no comfort to the black people who have to deal with this over the next 20 years and the 2%s every year don't accomplish much.  Oh well that's my Hot Take.
    From the context I learned in my African American Lit Class, I think one thing white people don't really realize is that its not just ok black people are getting along fine 99.5% of the time and then .5% of the time THEY GET KILLED FOR NOTHING HOW TERRIBLE!!!  Because that other 99.5% of the time, there's a wide spectrum of Fucked Upedness that can be done to your life (even just specifically from Police!)-- not just in acute situations, but the way it effects you as a person as a whole-- and it happens to pretty much everyone of color in this country.  That's my hot take on Hey I Went There!  The point is it seems hopeless but white people giving a fuck 2% more every other year?  THE MOUNTAIN TOP IS IN SIGHT!!!!  I think for a lot of white people they just don't wanna know.  They wanna think logically we are all equal now that's how it should be! but by deluding themselves into thinking that, they erase all the what-should-be-obvious unequalitude from their own cultural and political and legal consciousness.
    Ugh.  THERE I SOLVED THAT PROBLEM.  No I didn't.  Yeah but when I talk about it again in 18 months I'LL BE 2% CLOSER to solving it!  Well let's hope so.  What else is going on and crap.  The point is I have to deal with the fact that I've been drinking more French Vanilla Coffee Creamer than previously estimated and thus Coffee Is Even More Calories.  Remember that actor French Stewart.  Yeah I've spent my whole life trying to forget.  Probably should have Spit On His Grave, then.  That woulda given me some closure.  Also, I now realize you probaby haven't seen the movies-- when I say Spit On Their Grave I generally mean the rapee kills the rapist-- often in Rapey-ways!
    Of course it all comes back to my Pen Pal Program in 6th grade where I exchanged communiqué with a kid in Canada 3 times over a semester and, knowing I lived in New York, he asked if I knew any good Rapers.  I really should have reported this communiqué to my teacher so they could contact the authorities, this kid was fucked up as shit!  Well, anyway.  Took too many Ritalin yeterday.  I took 3, like a few times over the last 2 weeks, but this time around I was too much on edge.  The point is today I should take 3 Klonopin to even it out.  Even it out good!  Anyway Hulu has some good INTERVENTIONS.  My least favorite part is the INTERVENTION.  Where the INTERVENTIONIST 90% of the time leads with These people love you like crazy.  That's the boilerplate line.  I'm willing to bet half the time these people DON'T love the INTERVENTIONEE anywhere CLOSE to crazy!
    Huh.  One of my favorite Interventions/Addicteds is the episode revolved around one of the guys who did the song What Would You Do (From City High) which is a rap song I enjoyed as a kid.  And it turns out he's an alcoholic.  Why would I enjoy that.  I've said it a dozen times, I like watching addicted people enjoy their addiction for the first 30 minutes!  Or, if they're not enjoying it, they're deluding themselves into thinking they're enjoying it while they're really suffering-- CLOSE ENOUGH!  I'd like to see some #s on American Adults & Alcohol Consumption.  What percent of people don't drink at all, what percent drink once or twice a week, what percent drink every day, etc.  I WANNA KNOW WHERE I STACK UP.  Both Now and In Potential Future and Pasts.
    Anyway-- rape, racism to the point of murder, addiction, French Stewart, spitting on graves--  WHATTA LOAD OF LAUGHS.  French Stewart.  French is an adjective.  Hi my name is Stewart I'm from France.  I'm a French Stewart.  Also kinda sounds like a sexual act.  Did a French Stewart on her she enjoyed it no reason to spit on my grave in the future the French Stewart was 100% consensual!  Anyway.  Lotta talk about a Black Lady for VP with Joe Biden.  Great!  I think all other things being equal that would be the way to go.  Even with all other things being unequal it's a solid move to make!  Only thing better would be if Joe Biden came out as identifying as a black woman.  Anyway what's up time for a Break.
   

That's All Behind Me Now

    Well, great.  I found my Recorder from Elementary School.  The thing that's like a flute but presumably 1/10th the cost and no one really knows how to use it to make it sound like something.  Figure I'll give that a shot.  I'm not sure they ever even tried to teach us.  I think they just handed out recorders, and every Auditorium Session Once A Week, they were like alright go play National Anthem.  And we all did it in the right rhythm so it sorted of sounded like something but it was all random notes.  Or monotone. I can't remember.  I have a memory of just, whatever holes I was holding down or not, it just produced one note.  That can't be right but there it is!
    Cool.  I think that's something I never really realized, up to being in Chorus in middle school.  During practice is kinda sounded like something because a solid 2/5ths of us were singing in tune, but even the rest of us were singing At The Same Time, so it sounded close enough to me.  To an outsider its more obvious this is nonsense tunes.  Looney Tunes one might say!  Hmm wonder if anyone owns the copyright to that.  What else is going on and crap.  Anyway, I'm not equating it 100% or anything, but I kinda know hwat its like to be incarcerated against my will for dubious reasons.  I've been mental hospitalized without my consent at times where I Was Sick BUT posed absolutely no threat to myself or anyone else.  So in that case C'mon What's Your Justification?  Oh well I spit on their graves now it turns out it all was worth it.
    There was also that time I Was taking a test in high school and I had to use the bathroom but the rules were you can't while test is going on.  WTF I wrote a letter to the principal about that.  Nobody cared but I spit on all their graves anyway.  Hey 10th paragraph!  That's a multiple of... 10!  Don't even give them the Dignity of your spit.  Your body worked hard to accumulate that moisture to keep your mouth and gums and teeth clean don't even waste it on this presumably-dead-person's grave.  Unless you're standing over the grave for several hours and you develop the need to spit naturally.  Then, sure, I can see it working. 
    Man oh man do I have fun every now and then thinking about a good quote for a tomb stone.  That's a thing, right?  I think I've visited cemeteries 2 or 3 times in my life and there was never a quote.  But I think in some cases there could be.  GET ME OUT OF HERE!  I've come up with 2 dozen better ones but that's the one that just came to mind.  I don't think enough credit is given to ReturnOfTheLivingDeadI's setting as part of why its great.  Cemetery.  Brilliant!  I know Night Of The Living Dead starts off in a cemetery for 90 seconds, but barely even uses it.  Just to establish mood before they go somewhere else.  I'd like to be Stephen King's editor in the 1980's reeading the transcript for Pet Semetary, debating whether to be like Look, Stephen... you do know... it's spelled... I don't know how to say this...
    Anyway.  If American Indians were so good with Magic Burial Grounds how come they couldn't figure out a way to not get Genocided.  Say they get massacred by some Colonialists.  Surviving members of the tribe bury all the dead at Pet Cemetery (presumably not called that yet, but you get the idea) BOOM BACK IN ACTION.  American Indians would have WHUPPED OUR ASSES if they had Pet Cemeteries lets be real about it.  Anyway a un I thought of a few days ago--  American Indians using Peace Pipes-- Holy Smokes!  Cause they use it for mostly-religious reasons, right?  Not just to mellow out.  Holy Smokes there now that's out there into the ether.
    Cool.  13th paragraph!  Druggish Consumption today-- besides morning medication I take every morning, we're at 2 cups of coffee and 1 Klonopin.  Hopefully all I need.  Maybe another Coffee Probably that's one way to go.  I find Older African American Women comforting.  And strong.  Is that a weird stereotype to have?  I think part of it is They've Been Through More Shit Than Anybody and they're still goin' strong.  I find Pet Cemeteries comforting.  I know its BAD to bury pets or people there but just having the option is comforting.  I find Elizabeth Warren comforting.  She may be white but she wears glasses and I LIKE THAT.  Besides she probably has som inside info on American Indian Burial Grounds.  Isn't it a thing where people are always like American Indians couldn't understand the concept of owning land!  Then what's the deal with the burial grounds.  That's The Dead Owning Land.  I feel very strongly about this.  No I don't.  What else is going on and crap.  American Indian Super Hero.  The balls in your court!

Where Is Everyone Going?

    Four days until 28 days since alcohol.  That's a month!  I'm comfortable going out on a limb and saying 28 days is a month.  It's even true once a year roughly 3 out of 4 times!  So there's a small chance things'll be like hey ya'll NYCers go out some beer ya'll get it What would You Do He would get beer.  That's what's important!  On the other hand though, I had a phantom taste of that Last Beer I Had Which Was Peanut Butter Flavored and I was like yeah that was no good I'd rather have no beer than that.  Maybe I just find Michelle Obama comforting.  She's in a league of her own when it comes to Black Ladies in America so it would figure she has an outsized impact on how we conceptualize black women.  Not elderly enough, though.  Get back to me when you're 75 Then We'll Talk!
    Cool.  Havin' my Favorite Smart Ones: The Frozen Meals.  It's called Pasta with Swedish Meatballs.  Hey check this one out person who invented meatballs was all like Yes We All Like Meat But Have You Heard The Good News About Putting Them Into Balls Before Consumption.  There's also a lot of elderly black lady poets and writers.  Many not with us anymore.  Anyway lunch is over figure I'll writ another paragraph or two and then call it a day.  I'm, let's say, 85% certain that In I Spit On Your Grave II the lady gets to Spit On Their Graves.  I don't get why in Hell Raiser, Pinhead is the most recognizable of the demons.  I like the guy whose teeth are always chattering.  Seems like quite the character!
    Ugh.  16th paragraph.  It can end at any paragraph!  Ya think you live a good life, you only rape half a dozen women, and what do you get, people spitting on your graves.  Hardly seems fair.  Don't worry about them-- the Teeth Chattering Guy is gonna give em ALL THE GRAVE SPITTING they deserve-- FOR ETERNITY!  Whatta do for dinner tonight.  No communal dinner but I might make myself pasta.  Macaroni!  Easiest thing to make!  Cause I don't need to make sauce along with it!  But I just had pasta as part of my lunch!  Maybe I'll have more!  I'll see ya later!

-2:24 P.M.

Wednesday, May 27, 2020

I'm Doing Fine With Myself

    I was gonna say I'm Killing With Myself! but why lie?  I'm running a solid C+ with myself.  Isn't C++ a Computer Programming thing?  Look you got a C+ adding another extra Plus isn't gonna make a lick of difference to anyone but you, okay?  You don't need it!  I think Upper Lower Middle Class is about a C++.  I'm upper middle middle class which I think is a solid B+-.  But that's today.  I dunno how much of an effect I'd feel if My Father No Longer Teaches.  We'll be okay but we might drop down to a a B-+-!---!!  Also the first two exclamation marks were Part Of The Grade.  Now we got a new thing.  That makes sense.  A teacher wants to emphasize your grade?  Add a !.  Say you've been getting D's and now you got a A-.  Give 'em a A-!.  Or a question mark to be like what happened here.  You're running an A average and you get a C.  C?.  I'm full of great ideas.
    This entry so far is a real DjoC22229*3jqklS9#(#&.  Look, I could spend 7 hours working out a system where I can somehow explain that combination of letters, numbers, and misc other symbols n a way that makes sense.  But I don't have seven hours.  Would be a GREAT LAUGH EM UP THOUGH. Yeah for you maybe.  I DON'T GOT SEVEN HOURS.  Started watching Misery last night.  I think I had only seen it once before and maybe only 3/4ths of it.  The point is We Are All Miseries Now.  Also is it just me or is Kathy Bates HOTOTTTOOTOTOTO.  I mean just the way she carries herself.  I LIKE It!  Anyway.  I always associate Elliott Smith's OSCAR NOMINATED song Miss Misery with the movie/book Misery.  I dunno what that's all about but I'm sure HE knew! 
    What else.  Why Oscar.  Hey we got these little guys made out of goldesque lead, we give em to Movie Winners.  What's his name.  Kinda looks like an Oscar to me, right?  You're the award guy.  Actually this isn't my main gig I just needed some supplemental in-- LOOK I SAID YOU'RE THE AWARD GUY GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT. Award.  Draw..a.  DRAW AWARD.  Look he's a little guy you know what he looks like why do I have to draw it.  That'll take 7 hours and I'm already busy thinking of ways symbols can increase context for grades.  That's an interesting way to go with awards.  Don't just pick a winner-- give all top nominated movies exact grades.  You still have a winner-- whoever got the best grade.  So you'll have a runner up where its like Jurassic Park II, 5th place, B+-?... all the way to Adaptation, A-?! and then Adaptation gets a gold star.  I'm gonna take a break now.

Coffee Is Calories

    I feel like we instinctually sort of associate drinking coffee with Dieting.  Not consciously, but under the surface.  Because Coffee is an Upper and Uppers are Diet Pills.  But if you're like me and put Flavored Cream in your coffee then BOOM YER ON THE WRONG PATH.  And then there are people who get full-on milkshake coffees and that's even worse!  The point is coffee gets some great press but in the REAL world its not so great.  Ugh.  If I'm getting Ice Coffee I get skim milk.  If I'm making my own hot coffee I use French Vanilla Creamer.  YOU FIGURE THAT ONE OUT LOL HOW BOUT SOME CONSISTANCY LOL WHERE AM I COMING UP WITH THIS STUFF.
    Uuhghh.  HBOMAX has debuted!  I wish I knew what the difference was between that and Other HBOs but oh well such is life!  THEY AIN'T SAYIN'.  Anyway I feel safe to say HBO is the best of Premium Channels.  Best original series.  Best for nostalgia because they were the first one out there.  Just a great name.  H B O YA KNOW WHAT I'M ON BOARD WITH THAT.  Now they got HBOMax.  I had a friend name Max once.  He is involved with this one way or another, that's my impression.  I wish I could do some research on what makes HBOMax unique otherwise I'd fail my Max Exam.
    Hey!  Max had a subscription to Maxim: The Magazine For Teenagers To Masturbate To.  Never put two and two together about their shared names but Hey Who Am I To Complain Look It's Eliza Dushku!  It's called a Men's Magazine but I think Boy's Magazine is probably more accurate.  I don't understand Newspapers.  How is a whole newspaper made up of A Lot Of Paper and A Lot Of Ink, in and of itself, a profitable enterprise?  Cause of the advertisements.  I dunno that sounds like a scam.  I don't buy into this, "Advertisements," thing one bit!  Isn't there a starship enterprise?  Lemme look that up right quick.  Yep it all checks out.  How about that for some reason!
    Cool.  How come Eliza Dushku never really panned out.  The paper she was made out of and the clothes printed on her were just too expensive.  And she was a hard, "No," to selling advertising.  I guess that's how this business chews people up and swallows them why spit it out you already went through the trouble of chewing it might as well absorb the nutrients and whatnot.  Looks like Frenched Toast is in the cards for tonight.  I will do the Griddle Station and my Mom will do the Soak Bread In Egg Station.  My Father will do the Cut Challah Into Thinnish Slices Station.  We're all getting in on the action this is a real Family Shared Experience!  Maybe even get my brother on speaker phone just for the Heck of it!  How is HBOMax not copyright infringement on CiniMax.  I think HBO owns Cinimax.  Oh How Convenient!!!  Is your infringement running.  No we just settled it we are owned by the same parent company.  You better go catch it!
    Anyway I had a great idea for lunch you're gonna love it I'm gonna have a bagel wait hear me out I will put some sort of creamed cheese on it and it will be great just perfect.  Anyway how is Cuomo still getting on TV every day.  My opinion on Cuomo is that he's a real C++.  In this current situation, at least.  Which, lets face it, if you're running a C++ as a politician, that's not bad at all.  Well it is bad.  It's under a B-.  But its better than a lot of your classmates!  However if you take out This Current Situation I'm bumping him down to a C-/C.  Also it's assumed that 95% of Republicans are D's at best.
    9th paragraph!  I'll say this about Andrew Cuomo, he's no Mario Cuomo, I've looked into this matter extensively and I can say with great certainty they are now, and always have been, two different people.  Not a great entry today but on the plus side is its still killing the same amount of time for me and/or you as a good entry would.   So pretty much mission accomplished All The Same.  Anyway.  Thinkin' about magazines I've subscribed for.  Can only think of Baseball/Sports magazines in high school.  For Fantasy Baseball Purposes.  I got ESPN Magazine, I got Baseball America magazine (obviously devoted to baseball, but exclusively prospects [high school/college AND already in minor leagues].  And maybe a 3rd one.  The point is it sounds crazy to spend hundreds of dollars a year for 3 years on Fantasy Baseball Research but I SWEPT MY LEAGUE FOR THOSE THREE YEARS and pretty much came out of the deal breaking even.  But All The Fun I Had and the GLORY OF WINNING made it Great overall!
    Hey 10th paragraph then I get to take a break.  I dunno how you guys feel about this, but I'm kinda into the last 4 or 5 sips of coffee when its cooled down to room temperature.  I kinda like it.  Well, that's enough about me.  How are you.  The point is all my meals is bread.  Well, two in a row, at least.  The point is How are you.  Had a good experience with Sliced Roast Beef from last week.  Goin for it again this time around!  Twice as much!  Last time was .3 of a pound.  This time we're probably looking at .6!  I'm only ordering .5 of a pound but last time they rounded it up thusly!  I'm gonna take a break now but the point is This Is Important Stuff!   
   

I Will Save The Entry With Goodness!   Presumably!

     Starting.... now.  So what circumstances am I in right now, what do I have at my disposal to get on the right track.  Well, I'm eating lunch (UnFrozen Pizza) and I'm drinking soda (Sprite Zero) and I just took Ritalin (3!)  I've never seen Frozen.  Except for the 5 page Summary of a movie I wrote in 2002 about a guy who gets frozen In Current Time and wakes up in the future... unfrozen.  To be played by Tom Cruise!  That's right I got him committed to it and everything.  Haven't seen him in much lately.  Latest thing I remember is The Mummy.  Which is similar to Frozen but this time it wasn't him and this time It's A Mummy.
    Anyway.  I'm on board with Pizza that tastes like Pizza Hut.  That's a tongue in cheek name to a TV show.  I'm On Board.  Reminds me of Bored To Death but that's not a pun they're upfront about what Bored means in that context.  The point is I'm assuming in 2021 every movie is gonna be an addition to the Unfriended franchise. Because its te only franchise I can think of where Remote Filming is pretty much all good.  So now there's 2 of them and by 2022 there will be 87 of them.  That's my best guess.  I bet there's some big time filmpeople making some RemoteMovies on the downlow and we don't know about it yet.  I bet lots of things!  The compulsive gambling keeps me entertained!
    Huh.  Finished watching Misery.  Oh.  I get it.  Kathy Bates enjoyed James Caan's books.  Also the character James Caan is playing is a good actor.  50% of the movie is just that character humoring Kathy Bates' character and I KNOW he's just humoring her but part of me STILL BELIEVES! Anyway halfway through this section of website.  So far so good!  I think Stephen King should write a Nightmare about Susan Collins.  I know he doesn't like her based on his Twitterfeed, might as well stick it to her the way only he knows how THROUGH FICTION.  Sure I call horror books Nightmares.  I feel Stephen King would be Okay with that.  They're both from Maine.  That's why its relevant.  There was a baseball player named John Maine.  He pitched for the Mets for a while. Not that great a player.  Baseball America.
    Anyway, what else is going on.  I should donate 20 dollars or something to one of these Contested Senate Seats.  Dunno which one to do it for, though.  I'll research that at some point presumably.  I'm on a bunch of Uppers might as well do as much stuff as I can over the next 2 hours!  I don't envy people who live in states without Sports Teams for Their Favorite Sport.  King is famous for being a Red Sox fan but GUESS WHAT they play in Massachusetts!  You can support them  all you want but They Don't Give A Crap About You!  When they win Championships they're like we wanna thank the great people of Massachusetts! they're not like we want to think A Sprawling Region Throughout The North East specifically including Stephen King!
    I dunno.  Last paragraph, though.  I'm glad I don't have any miseries.  Hmm.  Miniseries.  Maybe Stephen King was upset at one of the mini-series based on one of his books.  CRACKED THAT CODE.  Anyway.  Also re-watched New Pet Cemetery last night.  The point is I just figured out my family's password to Hulu GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.  I've said it before and I'll say it again, Stephen King has probably had the biggest impact on our culture of the last 45 years.  It's crazy!  All those movies, TV adaptations, THE BOOKS THEMSELVES!!!  And the funniest thing is that he's so self referential.  He himself is in every other story.  Hmm.  Stephen King maybe I should write a thesis on him for some sort of imaginary Grad Seminar.
    I dunno but I will write some more!  One might imagine Stephen King'll be the deciding factor in this year's Maine Senate Race!  This guy is making stuff happen all over the place!  Did I mention Frenched Toast is probable for tonight?  That's the plan!  So I'd say a solid 75-80% chance that plan pans out.  Anyway you're not gonna believe this but I have roughly 40 cents on Poker PLUS a ticket to a tournament with a buyin ~40 cents!  But I can't use the 2nd 40 cents with the first forty cents!  Do you believe it?  I know I set you up that you'd be surprised so hopefully you had some time to prepare believing it.
    Hmm.  Whattado.  So much good Comedy Stuff I could watch but Drama/Horror is easier.  Don't need to get into the Rhythm Of Laugh Em Ups just absorb the MOOD AND WHATNOT.  17th paragraph!  Food Delivery Friday.  That's fun!  It's like getting to eat but The Before Hand.  Anyway a couple of days ago I was talkin' about how Pam Grier might be the closest we have to a beloved Elderly African American Lady.  Then the next day it was her birthday!  So now she's even MORE CLOSEST to elderly!  I dunno that much about Pam Grier outside the Quinton Tarentino movie.  I know sh was in a lot of blaxxxplotation movies but I don't know too much about that genre at all.  heh just googled Pam Grier but typed in Pam Grief.  Good Grief.
    I dunno.  Brought up HBOMax to my Mom.  We have HBO so I was like yo some ppl with hbo get this bonus u shuold check it out and she was like cool cool yea def.  That's presumably how we talk to each other.  Anyway ALERT I am using that 40 cents that could only be used in a Sit n Go or TOunry NOT A CASH GAME.  So far so good!  I I can watch every Tales From The Crypt o n Youtube but it would be VERY EXCITING if they were all neatly thre on HBOMax.  And when I say Very Exciting, I mean VERY EXCITING IN CAPS JUST LIKE I TOLD YOU ORIGINALLY!  I dunno why any of this is happening.  Figure I'll aim for 20 paragraphs overall at this point.
    2 to go!  Then Dinner Preparation in about 3 hours.  Also spoiler alert-- I'm drinking water.  Little, "Inside Baseball America," right there.  Hey lets support the American League!  ALRIGHT GO USA!  Hey lets support the National League!  WAIT A SEC I THOUGHT... I ALREADY... Now I Don't Know WHAT To Do!  I think at some point they shuld have a league of their own.  Right?  Seems like there should be.  Hmm good solution to 2020 sports crisis.  Have All Female Leagues for just this year.  But they could get coronavirus just the same. Yeah but they're LADIES doesn't matter as much!  Oh no what have I done I've made a joke in poor taste.  By which I mean, if you enjoyed that joke, you have poor taste.
    Cool!  How's that DemA7 song coming.  I thought of a chord progression closer to Dumbass, that's the bad news.  DEBmA7.  But I don't like that B Major NOR Minor.  So lets just move along from that.  The good news is about Fresh Direct Delivery on Friday is htat there's no process of keeping up with the order while they replace/refund certain things.  You just get what you get.  The bad news is we just get what we get.  But the good news is ALRIGHT LESS WORK TO DO. Besides Coffee my most Bad For Diet For What Its Worth In Pleasure thing is indulgent breakfast sandwiches.  Great just great.  As long as this sit n go is going on so will the entry.
    Shuold be over relatively very soon, though.  We're talkin' between zero and 20 minutes probably.  But hey maybe just write this 1 bonus paragraph and that's it either way.  That's pretty good.  After the first 10 paragraphs I was like yeah I'll probably make it to 15 but none of it is worthwhile.  Now, I'm making it to 21, and presumably some of it is worth while?  I'm a happy camper!  Makin' more progress with podcasts.  That's become my Daily CircleWalk routine.  Listen to an hours worth of Podcast each mornin' while gettin' in my Circling!  Anyway I guess that's it for today.  See Ya Tomorrow!

-3:49 P.M.

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

There's So Much More To Me Than Laugh-Em-Ups

    I hope so, at least.  Because if I'm just laugh-em-ups wuh oh I'm not much of anything it turns out.  Damn I hate when that happens!  Anyway cooked a Raw Chicken last night for 2 hours and I feel there's a solid 80% chance I Don't Have Salmonella now.  I like those odds!  Anyway I'm Warm as fuck but I can't turn the air conditioning are Cause OTHER PEOPLE don't feel the same way.  PS IT'S MY MOM.  PPS MY MOMS ASLEEP SHE CAN'T TELL ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.  PPPS BUT SHE MADE HER WISHES KNOWN BEFORE SHE WENT TO SLEEP AND GREAT LOOK WHERE THAT'S GOTTEN US. ... ... ...  GREAT NEWS it just go EVEN WARMER so now its warm enough that Air Conditioning TURNT ON ITSELF.
    There's so much nothing to me including laugh em ups.  Oh well such is life.  I Started watching HOUSE: The Horror Movie Where George Wendt Is A Supporting Character and yep this movie Is Nothing.  There should be a Cool New Weird Social-Experiment Reality Show where they take 12 homeless people from different places all over the city and they all have to live together in the same house!  And see the sparks fly!  Wait, no.  Just let them live in a house with dignity.  SOUNDS WACKY.  Imagine if we had a war on homelessness which would be GOOD instead of other things that are DUMB!  George Carlin pointed that out once.  And, also, then imagine a politician flubbed a line and was like We must win our war on The Homeless.  SOUNDS WACKY TO ME.  There's so much more to me than going crazy roughly once every 3 paragraphs.
    I don't know what happened to my White Castle Mug.  My best guess is its in the dishwasher and no one has done the dishwasher in 3 or more days.  Kinda my only guess, too.  The point is great what else is going on.  We have Diet Mug Root Beer, is that relevant?  That's the soda My Mom Likes.  Spoiler Alert.  Anyway I was pleased to find out that the raw chicken was actually able to be cooked in such a way that it didn't feel like I was eating Raw Meat.  It still may have been raw, but it tastes 80% normal.  And only 20% raw.  Raw Is War, we learned that from the WWF.  Dunno what that means in retrospect.  That was the name of the weekly Cable TV WWF/WWE 2 hour wrestling show.  Raw.  Which, fine.  But they always advertised it as Raw Is War. And I get its a palindromes you don't have to go around tellin me about palindromes.  But WHY.  Is it like each wrestling match is a WAR!  Or maybe the entire show is the war.  Each match is a battle.  So one Tag Team can win the battle but the highlight match at the end for the Intercontinental Belt is THE WAR.
    I don't know what happened to my sanity.  I think I had a thought in a dream last night Ya know what I should figure out how to bingewatch Seinfeld.  But its hard to say because I Also Had That Thought When I Woke Up.  I definitely had it when I woke up.  But I'd say there's over a 50% chance it was spurred by having the thought in the dream beforehand.  Also whose the guy who writes/plays the bass riffs for Seinfeld Interludes.  Because WTF THIS IS NONSENSE.  There's no real tune to any of it.  Just random notes.  And my point is are there any jobs like that.  I feel like I could play random notes like that just as well as any real-time bass player.  Also whose idea was it.  Was Seinfeld or Larry David just REALLY into bass guitar and they were like OH MAN WE GOTTA DO THIS.  Maybe it was the network's decision?  The kids these days they love bass riffs.
    We'll figure that out presumably at some point down the line.  In retrospect I think one of the most charming things about Seinfeld is that it really feels like these 4 people are friends.  I think its possibly because its grounded in the idea that Seinfeld Is Real (Because he is!) and in a way he kind of knows he's in a sitcom.  He just projects this is my life my life is a sitcom I'm gonna see where this episode takes me.  And also because the actors are great.  Also have we retroactively Cancelled Michael Richards?  I mean, I think we did at the time, but we weren't explicit in referring to it as Canceling.  Also is there a Parole Type Situation for cancelled people?  Doesn't seem fair to cancel them for Natural Life.  5 or 10 years down the line let Michael Richards appear before a parole board and let him give his case.
    Also I think it's kind of naive to think we can cancel people.  WE HAVE NO POWER.  If we could we would have Cancelled Trump 2000 times already (Going back only to 2016... if its his whole life, let's say 20,000 times).  We can whine and moan and sometimes Entertainment Industry is like better cover our ass and drop ties with this Guy but ultimately we have to eat whatever shit sandwich they're serving us.  Whether it's Michael Richards and/or Donald Trump.  I'M GOING TO MAKE A CITIZENS CANCELLATION ON MICHARL RICHARDS HE RUBS MY BOAT THE WRONG WAY.  Michael Richards appeared on Curb Your Enthusiasm working with an African American.  I think that means all is forgiven.  Until we cancel Larry David!  Then everyone he's un-cancelled goes back to being cancelled IT'S THE ONLY FAIR AND RATIONAL WAY.  Break Time! 
    Oh, one more thing.  Is Citizens Arrest a real thing?  Does that work?  I feel like we'd be seeing A LOT of citizens' arrests' if its real.  But I mean, someone got that from somewhere, right?  I'll look that up right quick.  WIKIPEDIA----In the United States a private person may arrest another without a warrant, for a crime occurring in their presence. However, the crimes for which this is permitted may vary by state.  That Does Not Sound Right.  But now you know!  Kinda seems it would be used 95% of the time White People On Black People, right?  Well, maybe not 95% of the time.  Maybe only 70% of the time.  And then another 25% White People on Latino People.  Can I make a citizen's arrest ON THE LAW and be like yeah this law I'm calling it into question WAIT RIGHT HERE WHILE THE SUPREME COURT COMES.  Be back in a bit.

That's The Spirit!

    Maybe there was a war on Homelessness?  I don't remember the GC bit the whole way through.  I was just thinking about it and it worries me a bit how Excretion Through Pee Holes work.  What if The Pee Source and The Cum source get confused?  What if Cum is jamming up the circuit and pee is being impacted?  It seems like a mess waiting to happen.  I remember my entire life I was like jeez living with a catheter must SUUCK Sounds like SO MUCH PAIN.  But now that I think about it I'm like ya know I could probably get used to it.  Not such a bad deal, after all.  Cause at first I imagined it widened up your P-Hole to painful measures and even goes inside a bit UGH.  But now I think I can live with it and see the bright side which is that I don't have to do anything if I wanna pee.
    That's the spirit!  Not 100% sure why we need two balls.  Can't one ball get the job done?  Why was evolution like NOPE WHAT IF 1 BALL IS HAYWIRE WE NEED A BACK-UP BALL.  I mean, I'm glad we got back up balls.  And also aesthetically its more pleasing being symmetrical.  But I don't 100% see the point.  What about nipples.  Again, we need backup nipples.  I feel very strongly about this.  I was feelin kinda sick last night and I was like boy I hope this is salmonella from eating raw chicken and not CoronaVirus!  I feel better now though so I Hope This Is Nothing.  Anyway.  When I was throwing out the garbage last night, I was thinkin, to the environment, GET READY!  I may not be taking a walk tonight, I may not be taking a walk tomorrow, but it's coming.  Fair warning!  PREPARE YOURSELF!
    I dunno.  What paragraph is this overall.  10th!  Perfectly.  Err, perfect.  I saw Trump is stepping up his effort to muddy the Vote By Mail water by now tweeting negatively about it IN ALL CAPS.  First he starts no caps with an issue.  Over time it's some caps.  Once he's at ALL CAPS HE'S AT FULL CAPACITY EVERYTHING IS FIRING AT ALL CYLINDERS WE'VE BEEN PRIMED FOR THIS AND NOW THIS IS WHAT WE'VE PREPARED FOR!!!!  I dunno what any of that means but it Feels Right.  Lunch today is probably finishing Once-Raw Chicken with some Spanish, "Yellow," Rice.  Or was it Yellow, "Spanish," Rice.  I'm guessing the 1st one but there's no way of knowing for certain.  I'll be back in a bit!

Smells Like Teen Laugh-Em-Ups

      I, well, sure, yeah, if you put it THAT way.  Hey lunch should be in about an hour, an hour and a half.  We're talkin oh right I already told you.  Here's some New Fresh Info, though-- GONNA EAT SOME SOUP WITH IT TOO!  We've got a dozen different kind of chicken mostly-noodle soup, and some vegetable soups, and a Manhattan Clam Chowder, but FUCK ALL THAT I'M HAVING THE ONE BEEF BARLEY.  This is as rebellious as I get.  I'm gonna have the 1 soup we don't have a back-up for FUCK YOU IF YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH IT AND THINK OTHERWISE.  I, well, sure, huh, that way, huh?  In theory I might like Manhattan Clam Chowder but I'm not willing to take that risk, not today.  What if the Manhattan Project was to Perfect Clam Chowder.  Laugh-em-ups!  Be on the look out for more laugh em ups as this section of the entry continues.
    Another great option of what to bingewatch is Tom Goes To The Mayors and Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Jobs.  I think Awesome Show Great Job is sweet because its not just saying hey you did a great job it's also saying This is a great job that we get to do and I like to see that sentiment out there makes me feel good.  I remember there was like a 2 hour block of 15 minute shows on Adult Swim that I would watch while, "High on, 'Marijuana" as the kids used to say. It was fun!  Also this must have been in the summer because I was still in NYU but I'm picturing watching it Pre-recorded and NYU TV didn't have that option.  Mmm summertime highs.  Summer Heights High.  Hmm.
    What's the policy on getting rid of small bugs you come across indoors.  Get a tissue and crush em and throw it out is probably the popular option, right?  What I like to do is Flick 'Em Across The Room.  Ya know, with my middle finger.  Nice ol' powerful flick.  And if they survive that all the more power to them.  Either way they're not my problem anymore unless they survive and come back to this part of the room.  Which I don't see happening why take the risk they saw what happened the first time they showed up at this side of the room.  How many people have made a Herbie The Love Bug STD joke.  Hundreds?  Thousands?  Well if it was zero... There You Have It.
    I dunno.  I was thinking about how when I was a kid having a job being funny seemed impossible and I was Funnier Then and now it seems somewhat within reach if all goes well and I'm Less Funny Now.  But when I was in middle school, in my mind, I kind of imagined ok like only about a dozen people actually get paid to be funny.  Now I realize yeah there's probably thousands of people in America who get paid primarily for Laugh-Em-Ups or The POTENTIAL for Laugh-Em-UPs or a PAST RECORD of Laugh-Em-Ups or their work is somehow Laugh-Em-Up ADJACENT.  So the point is I'ma do me and see how that goes for some reason.
    15th paragraph!  Figure I'll aim for about 20 overall.  I figure lots of stuff, this being one of 'em.  Also I refuse to spell Laugh, "Laff," even in an, "Em-Up," context.  That's one bridge too far!  Like the bridge to Teribithia!  If I remember correctly it was make believe!  But one of hte main characters dies or something!  I don't have all the details I read this book 23 years ago!  You know what book I loved as a kid.  Air Bud.  That movie adaptation got so much of it wrong, though.  I dunno what that means.  Inhaling Marijuana through Vaporization is Air Bud, right?  Sorta?  I don't have all the details I haven't smoked marijuana since 12 years ago!  And even then I don't think I ever used a vaporizer!  I bought one once, a cheap ass thing that looked like a pencil sharpener, it was like 100 or 200 bucks, and I never got it working!  But if you needed a pencil sharpener prop in a movie It Could Get The Job Done!
    What about Heir Bud, and the dog turns out to be the rightful heir to the British Crown, and then The Dog Becomes King.  What about it.  I dunno just think about it.  I choose not to.  Fair enough.  I wanna read about past (or present!) civilizations where they didn't just hold animals in esteem and/or worshipped them, but where the animal was actually the leader and made important policy decisions.  Closest thing I can think of throughout history is Groundhog Day in America.  So basically the 1st Best Democracy for a while, but also, we're the closest thing to an animal is sort of in charge of part of the country every now and then.  Anyway.  Take a break.  Come back with lunch and write a final 4.  Seems like one way to go.

Major Mix Up!

    Instead of pairing Chicken & Rice with Soup, I'm pairing them with SMall Roll (Made Out Of Bread).  But anyway chicken is on point roll is doing well and the Spanish Rice is the tits.  Remember for 2 days Trump was trying to make Wuhan Flu catch on?  And then he just sorta gave up.  We did used to have the Spanish Flu, though, no one complained about that!  LETS CANCEL ALL OF THEM RETROACTIVELY.  The Spanish Flu IS the one we've all been thinking about.  The stuff from 1917.  Or, as Trump says, 1918.  We're gonna have to agree to disagree on that one. Anyway getting FreshDirect on Friday.  Which means I can try 2 or 3 New PreCooked Awesome Meals!
    Wow!  How come its not a Man Thing where its like how would I like the chicken?  RARE please.  Steak it's very masculine to eat as undercooked as possible.  But other meals no one gives a shit!  What's the deal!  How would I like this apple?  ROTTEN, please.  How would I like that ice cream?  MELTED, please.  Men embarrassed to wear masks outside.  But all of their heroes wore masks!  Batman, for example.  This is dialogue from a Simpsons episode.  Anyway why aren't they embarrassed to wear regular clothes.  I COULD BE WALKING AROUND HERE NAKED BUT NOW PEOPLE KNOW I'D BE TOO COLD AND EXPOSED TO THE ELEMENTS TO TOUGH IT OUT.  Which brings me to another Simpsons line-- someone who doesn't want to wear pants yelling at a Trump Rally saying DONT YOU HATE PANTS?!?
    Also, if someone is so insecure that they're worried how wearing a mask that stops them from getting sick, how is that manly?  That's the wimpiest shit I could imagine.  THE BIGGER BOYS WILL LAUGH AT ME MOMMY.  I NEED TO PROVE TO DADDY TRUMP I AM A MAN I RISK MY LIFE FOR FACES I'M THE BIGGEST HERO OF ALL THE TIME.  The point is dinner is wide open.  It could be some sort of Cooking Pasta like Macaroni.  It could be some sort of Frozen Pizza-Hut-Esque Pizza.  Could be 2 Lean Pockets.  Could be chicken nuggets + mini NONWHITECASTLE hamburgers.  Some sort of sandwich I suppose, with a soup!
    The world is my oyster.  WTF i wanna do with an oyster pointless.  I was reading somewhere that Trump secretely hates/doesn't respect all his followers, and I dunno if that's true, but I kinda hope it is.  Not like me, thuogh.  I don't know any of my followers, but I know Search Engines like this website well enough, but either way I'M ON BOARD WITH YA!  That's one of 2 or 3 ways I'm different from Trump.  Another way is how we spell our names.  Totally different letters and in different orders.  Ugh. Anyway the entry is done lunch is done I'M DONE!!! I'll see ya tomorrow friends.

-3:03 P.M.

Monday, May 25, 2020

There Is A Pun Hidden In This Title

    Anyway, what else is going on.  Was reading an analysis of how COVID #s are going in New York, and at this rate, looks like most preventative measures will start being relaxed end of June/early July.  And that very reputable SubTweet I was reading concluded its Thread by saying so at July 4th New York may have a lot to celebrate.  And 2 months ago I Freakin' predicted July 4th!  LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S A GENIUS.  Unless the Subtweeter read my prediction and went along with it even though the numbers are different.  In which cas LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S POTENTIALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR A RESURGENCE OF CASES AND DEATHS!  Either way HEY LOOK AT ME!
    So that would be 4-6 weeks.  I like it!  Also July 4th is great because I could use that to Sell me resuming alcohol consumption.  I'd be like look been over 2 months now its July 4th PPL DRINK ON THIS DAY.  And that's how the resumption of Alcoholic Consumption Begins!  Anyway things are looking up and whatnot is the point.  Anything can happen though.  There are, "No Holds Barred," when it comes to dealing with CoronaVirus so we can't get ahead of ourselves.  The good news is maybe in like 2 weeks I can start taking walks outside by my lonesome and wearing a mask.  The other good news is this paragraphs is over by the end of this Good News Sentence.
    Why.  I dunno.  Had a nice Roast Beef Sandwich last night as a change of pace and ya know what GREAT.  Also got 1/2 Chicken BBQ Style which I will pair with RICE for either lunch or Dinner.  Well, split it into 2 meals presumably.  With one being either today's LUNCH or Dinner.  My other CoronaPrediction was 10 superbowls of death, although I also left room for it being only 1 Superbowl.  Right now we're at 1.5 Superbowls or so, looks like, if all goes perfectly, we might top out at 2 or 3 superbowls.  In an ideal world.  But certainly possible based on my expert analysis from reading various different subtweets which are sub-tweeting of Experts Analyzing.  Subtweets on Experts is like when you're researching in an intensive college class and you have to go to a 2nd book to find the definition/reference in the 1st book you were studying.  Except its by either Dumb People or Straight Up Robots.  I STILL TRUST 'EM THOUGH THERE MUST BE SOME VETTING PROCESS FOR PEOPLE REPLYING TO CHECKMARKED PEOPLE!
    Whose wheel do I have to grease to get me a check mark.  There's gotta b someone who'll take a 3 figure bribe for that.  In all honesty, yeah, I'd probably pay 150, 200 dollars for a Check Mark.  More than that is just stupid.  Might as well let time play out itself and maybe I get there naturally.  But that's a nice cool gift you can even give someone else.  Birthday, Christmas, hey I sponsored you for a Twitter Check Mark.  That's fun, right?  Sometimes I think about people who register obvious Twitter Names and/or domain names and how much do they get for selling it to the people who its obviously relevant for.  Like a Celeb's name on Twitter.  Say a B List celeb.  How much cash are they willing to shell out for just @TheirExactName.  If it's A LIst you can probably honestly get 5 figures.  But it goes down exponentially from that.  The point is Start Registering All Kinds Of Combinations Of Names and sooner or later there will be a celebrity with that name and then CASH IN TIME all your hard work has paid off!
    I find it amazing that across celebs, comedians, politicians, media figures-- I always see this person signed up for twitter in 2009.  HOLY SHIT how were all these people so ahead of the game?  Not a joke just wanted to say how impressive I found that.  Hey what else is going on and crap.  Not 100% why many Twitter Bios these days say Him/His/...etc.  Is that necessary to reading someone's tweet.  Well I was gonna interpret this tweet and react to it one way BUT IT TURNS OUT THEY IDENTIFY DIFFERENTLY NOW I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK.  That's my, "Hot Take," on things.  Also Retweets are not endorsements.  That's all over MediaPolitic People.  Honestly I wasn't gonna assume they were!  Especially since its been pounded into my head how retweets aren't endorsements from all those BIOS at this point already!  You can remove it Your Message Has Been Made!
    Also let me revise my estimate of CoronaDeaths being 2-3 superbowls... lets say it's 2-3 NBA Finals Game 7 if you catch my drift.  It would make more sense if it was baseball the first time around.  Football is pretty well beloved by all colors and creeds.  But its close enough to a joke that I felt comfortable making it.  Also I can easily look it up but lemme throw it to you-- does wearing a mask help keep CoronaVirus from you does it help keep you from spreading it to someone else, or does it do both?  Lemme look that up right quick and share answer with you!  it's definitely the 2nd thing and maybe the 1st thing I GREW WEARY OF READING TOO MUCH SCIENCE.
    My guess is it helps!  And as someone who reads subtweets by anonymous dummies I think my hypotheses are pretty worthy of your consideration.  Anyway finally finished The Wire Again.  Obvious thought about whats next was well I guess I fuckin have to do The Sopranos again at this point right?  But I don't really want to.  So each side makes a compelling argument.  On one side, seems like a logical prediction of what I might do based on recent evidence.  On the other side, I'm Telling You Right here and now I DON'T WANT TO.  Hey already into the seventh paragraph.  Whatta do with today.  Thought about watching Mr. Show again and it is my favorite show in history but on the other hand I just don't feel like it!
    If I'm joking about how African Americans are more likely to get Coronavirus, shouldn't I make a similar joke about how its even more likely by far for it to be elderly people?  What sport d elderly people like?  Baseball?  Yeah but you're forgetting probably mostly Elderly BLACK People!  Negro Leagues?  Ugh I apologize for this Unless I Think Of A Good Joke From It which I haven't yet But I Still Might.  I know we're desensitized a lot from Bullshit Trump says and pulls, but explicitly encouraging people, over and over, to take drugs which will kill you a very significant amount of the time... uh... we're supposed to just move on from that?  I mean... huh?
    Oh well such is life.  Today is Memorialize Day.  I learned somewhere Memorial Day is for Dead Troops and Veterans Day is for Live Ones.  That's one of the main Federal Holiday pieces of knowledge I have and I am very very proud of it.  How come there's no Great Citizens Who Were The Tops Hell Let's Just Say ALL OF US Day?  I dunno.  How come lots of things!  My mom has always said for years and years don't put her in a nursing home.  No matter what the circumstances.  She'd rather die.  And I still refuse to honor that request should those circumstances arise but now I kinda get it seeing how they just don't give a shit to protect their residents from CoronaTheVirus.  Also I may be confusing Two Things My Mom Has Said.  She said No Nusing Homes, and she said No Hospitalizations If She's On Her Death Bed.  I conflated the two which are slightly different.  NOW YOU KNOW.  Anyway...
    10th paragraph!  I don't believe it 10 paragraphs without a break?  Been a while since that happened.  Maybe having a solid day in which Drinking Will Probably Resume has got me excited.  Maybe taking 3 Ritalin and being on my 2nd cup of coffee has got me excited.  Maybe reading Subtweets of Paul Krugman has got me excited.  Maybe lots of things!  I love Robert Reich and I don't care who knows it.  Me and him Super Short Guys we gotta stick together.  Also he's really smart and I agree with his politics!  That covers that.  ALSO he had a bit with Conan he did at least 2 times where they're crime fighters or something and it looks funny because Conan is 16 or 18 inches taller than him.  ALSO well that's about it but the point is Robert Reich is Great.
    Wow.  11th paragraph.  Been quarantining for about 10 weeks.  6 weeks from today is July 6th.  WE'RE GETTIN' THERE BUDS HOLLLLA.  Maybe resurgence and then we have to readjust again.  DAMMMIT.  The important thing though is what sports do Elderly Black People particularly like.  Shuffleboard?  I'm not 100% what that is but if FEELS right.  I was thinking about the war on Terror and all that in the 2000's and how if we do this or act this way The Terrorists Win but all Republicans did was use Fear to keep us supporting them and their foreign policy in particular but also domestic spying, etc, all based on fear... THE TERRORISTS FUCKIN WON.  We spend a decade being terrified!  JESUS!!!  The good news is I'M NOT SCARED ANYMORE just like Kevin McAllister With His Radiator!
    Anyway.  It's a good thing we solved terrorism.  I mean, Muslim Terrorism.  White Terrorism is on the rise but I'm assured they're good people so Nothing To Worry About.  Its because they hate our freedom.  How did that line ever work at all.  Hmm yep sounds about right it checks out they want us dead because they think about our freedom so much and it just drives 'em Crazy.  Is it because they're jealous and want our freedom for themselves?  Or is it just they live in a culture/political world where they see people with somewhat more freedom and they're like NOPE THAT'S NO GOOD BETTER TERRORIZE THEM TO MAKE 'EM STOP.  I dunno crap and crap.  One example of a freedom I can imagine Muslim Extremists hate is Abortion BUT THE REPUBLICANS HATE THAT FREEDOM TOO!
    13th paragraph.  I should call this the 14th paragraph.  Skip 13th paragraphs every entry Because of Bad Luck.  But I won't.  But I should.  And it can be a running joke.  Lets just pretend I went with the running joke and Laugh All About It now without me having to follow through with it.  Who decided 13 was unlucky.  Hmm, 11, 12, thirte--- wait a second I DON'T LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.  I'm sure there's probably some physical reason that for some reason 13 is different.  Like how we got 10 digits, that's a thing.  Or we have.. I dunno... 13 occurs in nature somewhere in a BAD WAY.  That's my best guess.  Either that or Someone Just Had It Out FOr 13 and it caught on with everyone I DUNNO.
    I like how Michael Moore Never Wins.  I mean, I don't like it, cause I agree with him pretty much all the time as far as  I know (I don't know Too Far), but it just seems like every time he makes a movie or puts himself out there for a cause He Always Fails.  He's the perennial underdog who for a week or two it feels like alright Now Michael Moore is on the war path and he's finally getting something do-- oh wait no never mind what he was advocating for has floundered yet again.  I think Bowling For Columbine was the 1st Major Motion Documentary Picture I was aware of.  Prove Me Wrong!
    Other than Jurassic Park.  It may not have been true but it was a Warning.  Dunno what the point of that was.  Anyway 1 more paragraph and then take a break!  There's gotta be a good reference for what sport Elderly Black people like.  That's not just a sport All Elderly People and/or All Black People like.  Specific to Elderly Black People.  WHAT SPORTS KEEP EM GOIN' COME ONNN.  I was thinking about, and probably will, googling it, but I'm not 100% I'm gonna get any kind of answer.  Ok here we go what sport do elderly black people like...  Oh.  I Get it. Parkour.  Be back in a bit.
     

Oh.  Right.  Hot Dog Eating Competition

    Anyway can Twitter be like #Dontkillmorganfreeman so people see who is actually dying from this?  Yeah it was fine when he was driving miss daisy but now that he's in trouble WHERE ARE YOU?!  Elderly Black People are some of the best people we've got!  If you did a NCAA 64 team bracket but instead of College Sports its Different Demographics, Elderly Black Men and/or Women WILL MAKE IT FAR.  So its nice to fantasize about things returning to normal but lets not get ahead of ourselves.  Why is it even a thing where 10% of people are like THIS IS VIOLATING MY RIGHTS I WANNA GO OUT SIDE I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING.  When they're recovering in the hospital from heart surgery, do they wake up from the surgery and a doctor is like looks like it was successful!  We need to keep you here another 72 hours... and they're like NOT IN MY AMERICA I'M OUTTA HERE!!!
    But its extra worse because its as if that happens, but on top of it, you're spreading your broken heart to other people.  Aww.  I WANNA STAND AROUND OUTSIDE WITH OTHER PEOPLE... ALRIGHT HERE WE ALL AER...  THIS IS FUN I GUESS... HOW LONG ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS?  I WONDER IF PAPA JOHNS IS OPEN LETS START A REBELLION TO OPEN PAPA JOHNS.  I dunno what's going on anymore.  Anyway If I've learned anything from Spiderman its that diseases Can't Stand loud clanging so if you clang a lot of metal things, ring some church bells, the disease will jump out of its host and flail around wildly, in which case you ideally have a Green Goblin Hand Grenade and destroy it completely once and for all.

A Title Is Worth A Thousand Entries

      That can't be accurate.  I'll look into it later!  I got things to do for now!  Just did some Disinfecting/wiping down stuff.  Now we're back to Zero of things I have to do!  I just lied when I said, "I got (i) things (i) to do for now!"  Sorry about that!  Anyway what elderly black lady should we make sure to save from Coronavirus.  Hmm a lot of MIDDLE Aged Great Black Ladies come to mind.  First thing I can think of is Younger Black People I like and like save THEIR MOMS and GRANDMAMS. No, there must be elderly black ladies Currently Alive that are wonderful.  Well Morgan Freeman was an actor.  IS an actor, even.  What elderly black lady actresses around?  OF COURSE I JUST GOOGLED, "ELDERLY BLACK ACTRESSES..." the results in the next paragraph!
    Angela Bassett?  What The Hell?  She's that old?  She's 60 apparently.  SIXTY IS MIDDLE AGED NEXT. A lright here's what Whoopi Goldberg she's a bit older.  She's 64!  That's gettin' there...  Pam Grier?  70 years old SHE'S IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD!  eThe point is this page defines Elderly as above 50.  At this point lets just say SaveLeslieJones-- 52 years old.  UH oh i was joking THE JOKE IS OVER WE NEED TO KEEP LESLIE JONES ALIVE.  I was playing in the beginning, all that's over with now.  If she dies, though-- the ghost buster has become the ghost bustee.  Anyway, sorry about all that.  But the point is African American Elderlies are disproportionately affected so lets keep them particularly in our thoughts and prayers.  And have that guide us through relaxing the responsibilities we've had thrust upon us.  It's not just about hey I'm safe it's about hey lets keep other people safe!  It's like taking a shower and you don't wanna waste water.  THAT WATER IS SOMEONE ELSE'S POLAND SPRING.  I kinda hope not.  SORRY POLAND SPRING.  So take shorter showers and don't spread Viruses.
    Last paragraph!  I dunno I was doing some research its all relative.  More white people get it and/or die but that's because there's more white people. The point is we are all relative.  Human Family.  In NYC alone, though, just barely slightly higher numbers of black people than white people get it!  No addressing for percentages or rates!  That's pretty notable because there's a lot of white people in NYC.  But that's my point of reference Cause That Be What Where I Am.  Anyway, great, I'm glad we ended on that.  Let's just make sure as little people die as possible is that a thing?  I don't mind not taking walks and drinking beers even though I've Now Been Explicitly Promised I Can Do Both On July 4th.  SET IN STONE WHEW THAT'S A RELIEF.  That's the point of the last few paragraphs.  Nothin set in stone lets take it slow we'll get there.  See ya later!  ...oh get this i just remembered something. I CAN STILL GET IT AND DIE or more likely I CAN STILL GET IT AND MY PARENTS DIE Wuh Oh!  And all those years being white never even paid off!  I'll see ya later.

-3:04 P.M.

Sunday, May 24, 2020

The Future of Entertainment!

    I think the future of entertainment is in Choose Your Own Adventures.  But more seamless than turn to page 64 for this, 83 for this other thing.  And also For Adults not just adolescents.  Also SEXUAL IN NATURE (sometimes).  And its not like you read a whole page than make a binary decision.  No you're making one decision with a dozen possibilities  EVERY SENTENCE NO EVERY WORD.  Once Technology has caught up with this ALL stories will be Choose Our Own Adventures!  Anyway finally made progress on a new song for the first time in A Year Or So!  We're talkin' a D Em A7 chord progession.  Probably for verse MAYBE chorus instead!  Also is the Em actually an Em7?  I'm not telling I gotta keep ya guessing somehow!  I also like it because DEmA7 is the closest you can get to spelling out Dumbass in Musical Notation Chords as far as I know.  My fingers instinctually know whats up how to make a vulgar profanity pun.
    I think the future of entertainment is DIY make your own entertainment.  Wait, that's not just the future, its also the past and present.  That's why Choose Your Own Adventure is so great.  It puts you in the driver's seat without any of the hassle of Trying.  Anyway what kinda meals been goin' on.  You know pretty much the same stuff.  I heard my Brother is taking a Walk Today!  And he's been very cautious this whole situation so if he's doing that it speaks well of where we're at!  I would do it too but DAMN ELDERLY PARENTS STILL BEING A LIVE AND GIVING ME LOVE AND FINANCIAL AND SOCIETAL MEANS TO CONTINUE LIVING A COMFORTABLE LIFE WHERE DO THEY GET OFF.  Probably on giving me love and financial and societal means to continue me living a comfortable life.  Sounds about right PARENTS amiright?
    I think there may have been a dozen times from Ages 2-8 where I wake up from a nightmare and go sleep in my parents bed.  1 Thing I remember, interpret it as you will, I felt more comfortable on My Mom's Side than my Dad's.  I think its the nightmare aspect.  Momma is more of a NightmareComforter.  I used to Nightmare it up A LOT.  And I remember screaming MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM when I wake up.  So its only natural! Anyway Indulgent breakfast sandwich this week is Biscuit Based instead of Croissant based and Man Oh Man I'm into biscuits.  I think I first got into biscuits around 2008 when McDonalds had them their Southern Style Chicken Sandwich which is just Some Fried Chicken in a Biscuit Sandwich.  Presumably with a pickle on top.  SOrta copycatting other Southern Style Chicken Sandwiches.  But the point is This Was The Tops! 
    That's a prank we once pulled on my Dad.  He was picking us up ice cream (me Brother and Mother From Another Brother As Well As Myself) and I was like pick me up some cherry biscuits and he was like they'll know what I mean? and me and my brother were like yep.  And then apparently he asked for it, they didn't know what he was talking about it, and my entire family rejoiced in the minor humiliation of our Patriarch.  That'll learn him for going out of his way to pick us up ice cream: the frozen treat sensation!  Not a lot of other pranks in my past.  Or present.  Mostly just Pranks Pulled On Me.  And half the time I don't even realize!  Those are the best pranks.  Pranks are a dish best served cold, as the saying goes.
    Well, what else is crap.  If brother is taking walks, I can predict my parents will be encouraging about me taking Safe Walks maybe 1 or 2 times a day in one or three weeks.  I don't wanna rush it but if it seems almost definitely safe Way To Go!  I mean there's all levels.  In one week I can take a walk, in one month I can get a contact-less coffee, in 3 months I can start licking strangers buttholes again... these restrictions ease up over time.  That's where Coronavirus lives, right?  In the Butt?  I heard feces is particularly dangerous.  The kind that's defecated.  From a butt.  You lick the butt there may be some residual defecation feces.  Fun words to say!  I'll be back in a while!

Step Outside But Not To Brawl

    Scar Tissue that I wish you saw.  What kinda guy wishes people would see his scar tissue.  As if that's something to be proud of or want to share with people.  I'd say, you aavoid getting scar tissue, you're Up On Top You're Ahead Of The Game?  Scar Tissues?  Don't bring me down man I don't care about your failures.  Scar Tissue that I wish you saw.  WTF do you think it maeks you look COOL?  It makes you look WEAK.  A COOL Dude would have avoided scarring altogether.  sOn the other hand scar tissue is like Natural Tattoo.  That's a primitive way to tattoo, right?  Cut up your face in a pattern you like, when it heals, nice little scar with a smiley face or whatever you decided on.  First instinct for facial, "Tattoo," was a smiley face.  Hmm.  No wonder those Bikers kicked me out of their gang.
    Anyway I found a nice new Porn which is looking at Girls Gone Wild from the 2000's.  That's what Comedy Central was from 2-4 AM Lots of Nostalgia.  Pretty sure that's a win win for them-- they get the ad revenue, and because its infomercials of Almost Pornography for 2 hours, you get people tuning in SPECIFICALLY for the infomercials.  And anyway yeah its stimulating but I especially like the nostalgia aspect.  I also looked up the 30 second theme song to Dave Attell's Insomniac.  The point is Late Night Comedy Central was the tits and if I could go back in time I'd probably stay there for the rest of my life.
    Anyway.  Scar Tissue that I wish you saw.  Well, be patient, that's the great thing about scar tissue, it's NOT GOING AWAY.  The, "You," in question will come around eventually, physically as well as metaphorically, don't worry they'll see your scar tissue eventually.  Sarcastic Mr Know It All.  HEY YOU TALKIN' TO ME?  IS THIS ONE OF THOSE CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURES AND I'M RAGGIN' ON YA AND NOW YOU'RE CALLING ME A SARCASTIC MR KNOW IT ALL?  AHHHHH I HATE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS. sWith the bids I share this lonely view.  Well apparently its not that lonely YOU GOT BIRDS TO SHARE IT WITH.
    I can do this forever with this one song or forver times infinity with more songs.  But I choose not to that's my adventure.  Be a conscientious objector.  It may not have all the glory of someone who reads an adolescent book with a dozen different storylines but that's not the kind of guy I am my adventure is my adventure and you can't tell me any differently.  Also when you read a standard Choose Your Own Adventure, do you make your decision, then turn back and read the other way just because like GOTTA KNOW LOOK I MADE MY DECISION BUT A LITTLE EXTRA KNOWLEDGE AND PERSPECTIVE NEVER HURT NOBODY NO HOW.  Anyway, I remember some if not all of the CYOA I had were Goosebumps.  And sometimes it ended with you dying.  So you have to change your mind and read a different line.  I remember one Adventure ended with me turning in to a snail/slug and someone steps on me.  And I'm like that's hardly fair that didn't turn out great lets see what other option I WOULD have had were I still alive.  AAlso I have a sense memory of reading this exact book and this Exact Snail subplot while on Holiday that one time I went to DC!  First 10 days in Orlando Florida (Staying @ Disney resort but also spending a few days travelling to Universal Studios), then another 7 between DC and Williamsburg... but anyway Got Stepped on while at Disney Hotel.  I feel very strongly about this!
    Anyway got lunch in the oven we're talkin' 2 Lean Pockets I can, "Dig," that.  Was a great life hack when I realized to cut Hot Pockets in half before taking them out of oven, a lot easier to handle and eat without stuff oozing out of it.  Having them cut in Clean Halves.  Alright!  Also on Plane Ride to Florida, they had 2 extra First Class seats and me and my Mom claimed 'em, and I got some free Orange Juice and I was like ORANGE JUICE WHAT THE HELL THIS IS LIVING THE LIFE I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.  I can, "Dig," that.  My mom is watching, "Green Book," but insisting its called, "Green Card."  Bless her little soul.

I'll Have The Adventure He's Having

    Anyway, closing in on 3 weeks without ingesting any sort of alcoholic concoction.  ALthough at some point I still want to try my experiment of bathing in Liquor to see if I die.  I bet I would!  But gotta try just to see.  I think one of the biggest loses in Late Night Comedy over the past decade and a half is when there stopped being a ThrowOver from Jon Stewart's The Daily Show to Stephen Colbert's The Colbert Report.  And tehre's 20 seconds of them talking to each other.  There's nothing else like that anymore on TV!  Except on every cable news channel All The Time.  But not For Comedy And/Or People You Like!
    Sure I'd be interested in seeing Green Book.  My guess is I'd enjoy it because I'm white.  Also because Farrelly Brothers have made some of my favorite movies in Life including my One Absolute Favorite so why not give 'em a shot.  Besides in the end isn't Green Book just a Reverse Driving Miss Daisy?  My guess?  No idea haven't seen the movie have seen very little clips from the movie altogether I got no idea!  I like movies like BlackKkKlansman because its explicit about how African Americans and Jewish Americans are allies and I'm like YESSS WE'RE IN THIS TOGETHER! TEAM WORK! I KNEW WE'D BE FRIENDS I JUST KNEW IT!
    If one movie suggests it in its plot ITS GOTTA BE TRUE.  Whoever came up with the term Ally to mean someone who supports in both feeling and action sometime-marginalized communities did society a real Solid.  The word helps conceptualize it and it feels good to be/have allies!  We're in this together alight!  Also if we're the Allies that means everyone else are the... ugh.. WWII our side were allies, what did you call the ohter side?  The Evil Empire?  That's Start Wars... AH AXIS.  Not sure what that term is all about.  Lemme look that up right quick.  Looks like maybe Mussolini came up with the term.  He started it for just an Italy/German allience years ago in the 20's, but then they all (Them 2 + Japan + some other random places) agreed to team up to face Allies and Mussolini  was like hmm got this term Axis you guys in?  Good for them!
    HISTORY.  14th paragraph!  Lunch ready in about 25 minutes.  All in all Solid Day So Far.  Gotta do some disinfecting/drying/putting stuff away in a couple of hours, maybe 15 minutes worth of Chore.  Then even later today getting some new Supermarket Reinforcements which I'll have to do some more disinfect/dry/put away for another 20,30 minutes.  But all in all nothin' too heavy.  Two new interesting things I'm gettin from FreshDirect tonight is .25 pound of Roast Beef-- enough for a sandwich!, and some sort of BBQ Chicken Breast or something.  Enough for probably 2 meals With Some SOrt of Side.  Also, some sort of side I got --rice, not same as last time though!  Last time it was steamed brown rice.  Now it's called Spanish Yellow Rice.  THEM'S THIS WEEKS SPECIALS4ME.
    What kinda drug regimen I'm on for today.  Two Ritalins before entry.  Just barely outside the realm of Responsible.  Take one in morning every day, that's that.  Prescribed another one in the afternoon every day.  Today I took 2 instead of one.  No bueno but Could be a lot worse No Bueno if you catch my meaning.  I mean something easy to say but am Cleverly using Weird Phrasing And Words Sometimes Of Different Languages To Make It Sound... Funny?  I Dunno somethin'.  Anyway after this paragraph, take a 15-20 minute break, be right back here with the end of the entry.  Last  couple of weeks, my Writing While Eating skills have diminished.  I'm lucky to get 1 worthwhile paragraph.  Hopefully I get back into a groove today Let's Find Out Soon!

Entry Just About Almost Over Now

    Hmm, great.  If I am taking a walk in a week, maybe in a month I'll work up the courage to be like to my parents alright yo gonna get 2 beers on my walk, get on board with it, or ship out.  Except instead of ship out its more like get on board with it or... wuh-oh, you're not on board?  I guess I gotta ship out.. we'll revisit this issue at a later time.  Anyway in an ideal world here comes 4.5 more paragraphs.  Lets see how that pans out.  I think I had a deal They Solved Baseball.  It may not have been a dream and it may have been something I read when I woke up. No way of knowing.  ...Lemme pull that up right quick.  Doesn't look like they solved baseball.  Maybe whatever incremental progress they made from yesterday made a big impression on me when I first read it.
    Maybe lots of things!  I gotta stop getting these lean pockets.  The Pocket itself is Pretzel Themed.  I'm not 100% on board with that!  In a pinch fine it's just slightly worse than other Pockets.  But if I'm choosing why not go for a better Themed Pocket.  Anyway, after using Hot Sauce for everything for 2 weeks, I stopped using it completely.  Because it's good but Whatever I'm Eating is now just Tasting Like Hot Sauce.  And I don't want to eat Straight Up Hot Sauce Every Meal.  And any, individual meal, I'm like well I'm goin' out of my way to Eat This One Here Thing might as well Taste It Like It Should Be Tasted.
    Maybe lots of things!  I shouldn't have revealed my brother took a walk today. Now you know he's out there and I've put him in danger.  You're gonna go cough up Corona on him, but oh well, no going back now.  We're pot committed to everything this entry has and/or hasn't been!  Also the good news is after this paragraph Only Two More Paragraphs!  Sure there's Chores about an hour after this is over but hey chores exist from time to time that's part of life.  When you're an adult with a family providing for the family financially emotionally socially Everything Becomes A Chore.  That's my impression of how things work.  Oh my life is just to take care of these people now.  Well, I guess that's what I signed up for!
    Huh.  19th paragraph!  Maybe make this the last paragraph.  Maybe lots of things!  Good news I had to use an extra contact lens today because 1 of them got irrevocably damaged but it was THE LEFT EYE one which I have a surplus of.  Because probably 8-10 times I need to use an extra one it's ALWAYS THE RIGHT EYE.  So now we're making up some lost ground that's what I like to see regarding contact lenses!  One thing I noticed in Joker: Major Motion Picture, is some scenes of Joker writing is with his right hand, and other scenes he's using he left hand.  That sums Joker up lol.  Sweet lovable ambidextrous joker.
    And he is ambidextrous.  I could totally make out what he was writing either way!  Very Highly Skilled.  Also I'm not 100% convinced Thomas Wayne isn't his father.  I'd like to see some blood tests done and perhaps an appearance on Maury where they cover this extensively.  Whatever.  Another entry in the books.  Finally replenish my supply of soda after 1st round of Wiping Stuff in an hour.  I got bottles but none ready for Refrigeration!  The point is hey great I'll see ya later.

-3:15 P.M. 

Saturday, May 23, 2020

I'm The Best Idiot You've Got

    That's great, just great.  One of the main things I've learned from The Wire is that Stringer Bell holds his coffee cup from The Other Side Of Where The Handle Is.  And I thought that was really classy so I started doing it.  Between me and Idris Elba I think it's got a great shot to catch on with all sorts of demographics.  Also, I saw some other thing where Idris Elba was on a different channel, and apparently he's not really a drug dealer.  Also, he's still alive.  Also that ain't even how he talks!  I've also seen McNulty talk he's a Britain, Too!  The point is The Wire is really about England Trying To Reclaim What Was Once Theirs Namely Baltimore Maryland. 
    First you're marrying land, pretty cool you'll be marrying people of the same gender!  We're already there.  Well Great Why Didn't You Say So!  I Can Finally Marry My Land!  No just the Gender Thing.  WHAT THAT HARDLY SEEMS FAIR.  Maybe it's just a state of Only People Named Mary LOL.  Anyway.  I usually picture Maryland as Below Washington DC on a map even though I know its Virginia, and Maryland is above it.  I know Virginia also borders DC and I know Virginia is legit south.  I still picture Maryland under DC.  And I guess Virgina under Maryland, and its border with DC is attributed to the transitive property of Maryland.  I get confused easily is the point.
    I was in Washington DC once!  TRUE STORY.  The main memory I have is going to the Holocaust Museum (ANTI Holocaust Museum) and Whose That Supposed To Be Fun For?  I was about to say they should make Trump go to the Holocaust museum see how he likes it lol.  But then I realized I could just say they should make Trump go to ANY museum see how he likes it lol.  Anyway.  Made some Penne with Bolognese Sauce last night.  Pretty good!  Gonna finish it for lunch today and pair it with Some Other Stuff because the amount that is left isn't enough on its own!  I feel very strongly about this for some reason.  Good idea for Italian Restaurant-- Penne Lane.  But it has to double as a bowling alley.  That's The Rule. 
    Huh?  What else is going on and crap.  I could do without that Beatles song.  I could do without lots of Beatles songs.  But then there are lots of Beatles songs I'd not be able to do.. with or without... songs are gone... the movie Yesterday... what's going on.  Great news I'm down to ony 2 more episodes of The Wire until I'm released from my Long Term Contract of having to finish The Wire over the last 2 months.  Whew!  Anyway, I've made the joke about how Virginia's slogan Virginia is for Lovers is explicitly not true (VIRGIN-ia) but also just on a more basic level that's a freakin' creepy state motto.  It's like Virginia is Swingers coming onto us.  I DON'T LIKE IT I'm FLATTERED BUT I'M ALREADY IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP WITH MARYLAND.
    Anyway, probably take a break after this paragraph.  It's actually very exciting I just proposed and now we're in Engagementland.  Huh I could have done without that.  Too late to go back now!  Anyway lemme preface this by saying YES Slavery along with Native Genocide are the worst things this country has ever done and right up there with Holocausts Elsewhere In The World and Whatnot, but ONE GOOD THING about being a slave, if you're a slave At The End of Slavery, once you're set free, YOU GET TO CHOOSE YOUR OWN LAST NAME.  Cause they didn't give you one when you're a slave. Suddenly you're recognized as a good, full, 5 out of 5 Man, you need a name.  I think you probably had a first name but hey guess what pick a great last name!  That's why there's a lot of African Americans with the last name Washington.  You never meet a White Washington.  Because they choose that name after slavery AWESOME. 
    You know what?  I could fuckin' choose my own last name.  But it's too late into the game for now.  Also I, "Got There," because I was thinking about Colonial Williamsburg which I also spent time in when I went to DC and then I was thinking hhmm a whole Burg devoted to people named William.  That sums that up!  Maybe also why a lot of African Americans have the last name Williams.  Huge Fans of Colonial Williamsburg.  Are there a lot of Williams?  I knew Bernie Williams.  He was a Baseball Player in the mid 90's on The New York Yankees Of Baseball.  Well great I'm gonna take some sort of break now.  Be back soon! 

Do I Enjoy Doing This    

    When I was drunk during and/or full of ideas to say even before starting, sure, it was great.  Now, when I get into a groove here and there, that's fun.  I enjoy having DONE it, it feels nice to know another day has been relatively productive. But the point is GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT AND WHATNOT.  I saw Patrick Ewing has COVID19.  First the aliens from Moron Mountain, NOW THIS!  He's got the worst luck.  Also Moron Mountain, on further reflection, is more like an asteroid or something?  I like the Asteroid Belt.  The one in our solar system.  Between Mars and Jupiter.  I just think it really mixes things up, adds some variety to our solar system, breaks up the monotony of planets.  All them little asteroids man oh man I Wonder What That's All About.
    Sure, why not.  I hated it when my Father would untie his Asteroid Belt and beat me with it.  On MY ASS ter.... hemmeroids... well what else is going on.  My parents never beat me.  I'm not passing judgement.  They were just doing what they knew, what they thought was right.  I hold no ill will to them for Not Beating Me.  I think it takes A REAL MAN to beat his child.  Because he presumably loves his child and as the saying goes This will hurt me more than it hurts you.  Talk about A HERO.  That's my hot take on things.  Also I recognize beating a child is almost as bad as Native Genocide And/OR Slavery in macro terms as related to the microterms of How To Raise Children.  Well, not quite.  You're not genociding them by hitting them and you're also presumably not making them your slaves.  But still DON'T HIT KIDS I'M PRETTY COMFORTABLE COMING OUT AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE OF ALL KINDS.  Why did that paragraph happen.  I'm the best idiot you got. 

The Other Way    

    Instead of Ritalin today, I took a couple of Klonopin.  So Far So Good!  I don't feel that relaxed, but that's attributable to wrting something meant for human consumption with absolutely no inspiration or idea of what its gonna be ahead of  time.  But on the other hand Some Part Of Brain Go Sleepy Time Presumably.  I hardly feel any different but I'm Sure Somethin's Goin On.  I have no idea what the premise of Colonial Williamsburg.  Even if you want your kids to do something educational instead of fun, what the Hell are you gonna pick up there?  Hmm someone dressed in old time clothes is churning butter.  Now I understand the 18th century.  I don't even remember any churning butter.  The only thing I remember is being antsy about LETS GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.  There is a decent Amusement Park nearby if I remember correctly but Hey Why Be Decent Amusement Park Adjacent For Three Days And Go On The Fourth Day LETS JUST SKIP TO THE AMUSEMENT PARK!
    Wow!  Anyway I was about to be like hey anyone down for going to Sxi Flags but then I realized that might not be safe for another 2 years WHATTA SCAM.  What about Moron Mountain.  I feel like they might be safe from COVID because not a lot of human contact with Moron Mountain.  But I'd hate to be the guy who brings it over.  Its bad enough to imagine I bring it to my parents and they die.  Imagine knowing being responsible to bringing it to a whole population.  Like, in America.  There may have literally been JUST ONE GUY who brought it here.  And he's either dead or is like hmm wonder if it was just me or maybe he's Joker and he did it on purpose I don't have all the answers Maybe This Guy Does Let's Bring Him In Here!
    I think its unfortunate the only character I could play in a Batman is The Penguin.  And maybe Robin if they wanna go with a new, interesting interpretation, where he's not just sidekick in terms of Fighting Skill and Backstory but also Sidekick cause he's just a little guy.  All depends on my weight.  I'm a big heavy dude?  Penguin.  I'm an athletic Sprite of a fellow?  Lemme be Robin I'd settle for Robin I'M OUT THERE ON THE FRONT LINES IN THE CIRCUS I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE.  Also Robin and the Penguin should have a lot to talk about they're both birds.  Batman is a flying mammal.  I'm starting to notice a theme.  They all have names.  That's The Theme!  Not enough attention is given to the fact that Michael Caine NAILED Alfred.  Heath Ledger Nailing Joker, that's good, too.  And all the main actors in that iteration nailed it pretty well.  But Michael Caine as Alfred DONE THAT'S IT YOU CAN'T COMPETE WITH IT PAST FUTURE OR PRESENT.

Now We're Talking!

        One of my biggest fantasies is finding a group of like-minded people who I could work on Junk (comedy music whateve with) BUT OMRE IMOPTANTLY who can guide me through junk (comedy music whatever I SHOULD BE INTO).  I on't trust myself to delve into the world Popular Art to see what I like.  I need a Guide, a Teacher!  Some things Pasta-related I could figure out for myself But in terms of th 10,000 bands that may o may not be worth listening to I NEED HELP.  Same with Comedy.  Won't Somebody be my neighbor?  And the kind of neighbor who helps you with... stuff that you shuold l... why is your relationship with your neighbor so intense.  GIVE HIM SOME SPACE  I like Penne because its what I used to think Ziti was.  Same thing but with ridges.  The point is I'm done.  See ya later.

-3:07 P.M.

Friday, May 22, 2020

First The Title, Now This!    

    That was the entry talking.  Confused?  Welcome to my world.  Anyway welcome to the wide world of sports.  Why are we still listening to Andy Cuomo.  He's had his moment in the sun now its time to pass the torch to another governor.  I think each governor should get three weeks to talk every day where we have to listen to them and then pass it over to the next governor.  I also think EVERYONE should get one day at random to talk to people where they have to listen to you.  Just make it some sort of TVTime Lottery.  That would raise tax revenue like gangbusters.  Buy a 5 dollar lotto ticket where all the winner gets is a 1 hour timeslot in prime time on a basic TV network.  You'll raise hundreds of millions of dollars for something worth a fraction of it.
    The only problem is if it goes on too often it loses its novelty.  Maybe like once a month is spread out enough that people would still be interested.  Hey Lotto Winner on TV Tonight Wonder What They're Gonna Do.  Do they get a production budget to put together some kind of show?  I mean, I was thinking just let em talk or do whatever to waste time.  But logically speaking most people are gonna be like IMA PUT ON A SHOW!!!  So they'll need some funding, but still, a fraction of what the revenue would be.  Give 'em 100k, Hell, give 'em 500K its still a great money making scheme.  Also second prize gets to Give The Rebuttal.   Huh.  Yeah Winner gets 1 hour UNINTERRUPTED and then 2nd place winner gets 20 seconds after to deliver a counterargument.  How can a One Off Sitcom have a counterargument.  How CAN'T it is what you should be asking!
    And also--- get this-- give 'em the 42 minutes of the hour.  FUCKIN SELL THE AD SPACE ANYWAY.  What I would do is, if I won, I'd gather the Lazy Dozen of the other people who won that year, and be like OK GUYS I KNOW YOU WANNA DO YOUR OWN THING JUST HEAR ME OUT LETS BUILD A NARRATIVE WORK TOGETHER A!N!D! M!A!K!E! A! S!E!R!I!E!S!.  Also HELL YEAH I just discovered an extra way to emphasize something in text.  Feel free to use that yourself, in fact, I strongly encourage you to.  I can see this really catching on because Why Not.  Some places you can't use italics, underlining, or bold-- say, Twitter.  All you have is capitalizing everything and Mr. DumbFuck has ruined that for everybody.  S!O! G!O! W!I!T!H! T!H!I!S!
    Whose Mr Dumbfuck.  You know, that asshole.  What's his name.  He's been on TV a lot lately.  Anyway, what else is going on.  Got my Supermarket Order delivered a few hours ago.  Disinfected Wiped and Then Dried and then put away Fridge/Freezer stuff.  Other stuff'll just have to wait!  First Idea for what I would do with LottoTVShow-- have it as sort of a Film Critic Show, but instead of reviewing films, I review Past Episodes of Lotto TV.  Seems like a fun meta thing to do and would help elevate this whole enterprise into a new and fun space.  The point is I'm full of great ideas, I've got about a Lazy Dozen of them, and this is solidly One Of Those!  Anyway, gonna take a break now.  See ya soon!
   

I Think There Should Be A Thing Where Laugh-Em-Ups Happen    

    Well, sure, what do I got in store for today.  Gonna have a nice big ol' lunch.  We're talkin 2 Hot Dogs with 1 slice of bread, we're talkin Four Spheres of Potato I alerted you about a few days ago, we're talkin a Beef Barley Progressive Soup.  I like my Politics like I like my soup ideally not out of a can.  I like my Politics like I like my soup and I don't like soup.  I like my Politics like I like my soup Beef Barley we already covered that.  I like my Politics like I like my shoup I like to split it between two meals.  I like my Politics like I like my soup can I get a side salad instead.  I like my Politics like I like my soup imagine a different world where I actually tried separately from This Here Rambling Train Of Thought  to come up with GOOD punch lines here instead of just settling for the first dumb thing I think of.
    Well, sure, in an ideal soup.  Sometimes I think about it and I think one of the things I resent most about Trump is that he was in Home Alone II.  InsideBaseballMoment-- I just almost wrote World War II.  He wasn't in World War II because hes a coward would be on the other side and wasn't born yet.  But if you take out all those things sure he'd be in WWII.  Anyway, I resent he was in Home Alone II.  NOW HOW CAN I TRUST ANY Family Friendly Movie.  I like Family Friendlies.  So much more positive than when Families Feud.  They should have IntraFamilies Feud.  You'd need a lot of extended family members but yeah lets watch Families Go At It FROM THE INSIDE OUT.  I feel like that's a fun idea waiting to pop.  Generic Game shows where Families will be TORN ASUNDER by the lust and desire for Prizes!  Sweet, Sweet Prizes!
    On the other hand one GREAT thing from Home Alone II is they had that product tie in, the portable Audio Recorder.  In the movie he uses it and its main feature which Slows Down The Voice Recorded which also makes it deeper, so basically he's talking in a very low, slow, monotone voice, but for some reason people buy that its a Grown Up talking regularly.  And anyway I remember having one of those!  And I'm 99% sure its because it was a tie in with the movie that they sold though.  I'm 99% sure about a lot of things!  Like that I'm 99% sure about a lot of things!  Very Almost Definitely Sure about that one!
    Also Family Feud is one of my go-to topics.  I dunno why.  I feel like there was a period in my life I watched that semi-regularly but I cannot place it in the timeline of my life at all.  Must have been after I got sick and before I went back to college.  In those DumbFuck Years probably.  I think it really bothers me that my Mom said she liked The Dark Knight Incarnation of Batman, but not as much as Joker.  Because I don't think she liked those movies at all!  I think she's just being polite.  Because she knows how much I'm emotionally invested in Batman and doesn't want to hurt my feelings.  I think a lot of things.  Also I realized in Joker his name is just Joker as opposed to The Joker.  It's the little things that matter, right?
    Sometimes it bothers me that the world is being destroyed.  Because of the Changing of Climate.  Oh well what can ya do Apparently Nothing?  The crappy thing about life is I just watched Poltergeist Three: Why Was This Movie Made? and the answer is probably figured they'd turn a profit and they may or may not have I don't have all the answers.  The back-up reason, presumably is, figured it was a story that needed telling and the world needed to experience.  Is there a tertiary reason?  Maybe.  I'll get back to you on that.  Anyway 1 more paragraph and its 10 overall. The 2 sections aren't multiples of 5, but combined they are.  So I think that's pretty good.
    Well, great.  Spaghetti in Bolognese Sauce is a possibility for tonight.  On the one hand great I like food but on the other hand great I'll have to do 2/3rds of the cooking of it.  So I got that going... against... me?  Yeah sounds about right.  Good idea for a new Home Alone movie-- Macaulay Culkin is all grown up with a family and he leaves his kid home alone.  The kitchens have come home alone to roost.  Chickens, even.  Kitchens oh many what a Freudian Slip I don't believe it.  Now I don't even know if I WANT lunch.  I got some time to think about it though so I'll keep myself updated on this situation as it progresses. 

I'm Still Here  
   

    How's that working out for me.  Anything NEW or EXCITING about Supermarket Delivery I just got?  Well, sure.  Reduced Fat Cheez Its!  Haven't gotten that in, jeez, maybe the first week or two of Pandemic Quarantine.  At one point I plan to learn how to spell quarantine right on my first try, instead of relying on Spell Check each and every time.  I keep saying guarentine.  that first e is an a!  Quarantine.  There we go!  PSA U JUST GOT PSA'D. Guarentine.  Guacamole you eat while on Quarantine.  Is that turn of phrase.  Like how you could be On Holiday or On Vacation.  We're all On Quarantine.  Sure why not phrases are made to be broken.  Yeah.  YEAH.  Caronatine.  That's A Little Too Close For Comfort!  I smell a scam.  I don't think I've ever had guacamole but on the other hand who cares.  Gonna put the Hot Dogs in oven in about 15 minutes.  Eat in about An Hour From Now!  I don't care how ambivalent I currently am about eating lunch IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO. 
    Cool!  Workin' on just the one Ritalin today.  So far so good.  In fact it has been So Far I don't see myself poppin' another one this deep into the entry!  I think Delivery People have become very stealthy.  I can answer the door for a delivery less six seconds after the bell rang and I open the door and there's a box AND NO ONE TO BE FOUND.  I don't even see a car or anything.  NOTHING.  So maybe ghosts are delivering us packages?  Hey as long as it gets here Whatever Works.  What else is crappening.  Whatever paragraph I'm up to, I'm gonna take a beak @ Putting Food in Oven.  Then presumably write at least 1 Wrap Up Paragraph And Maybe More while lunch is being consumed.
    Cool!  What if Poltergeist 3 Was A Ghost and the movie never really existed it was a ghost movie that showed up on my Free TV/Movie App Which Itself Had Mysterious Origins and now I'm Haunted By Ghost Movies for some reason?  No that can't be it I've seen the movie a half dozen times here and there going back to my childhood.  But on the other hand maybe its always been a ghost movie.  Maybe all movies are ghost movies.  I don't have all the answers but presumably if I had some answers this may be one of the things I have an answer to but no such luck. Ugh.  Sure was a paragraph, though!  Can't take that away from me.
    I dunno.  The point is if and when I get married that absurdly short PsychicHelper Lady from Poltergeist is more or less the best I can do.  Oh well such is life.  Maybe she was a real looker when she was younger I shouldn't rush to judgment!  Maybe she's a ghost herself and not possible to be in a relationship with altogether!  I don't know anything these days!    The point is if and when I get married Mr. Miyagi is probably the best I can do.  I know he misses his dead wife he looks at pictures about it, he's gotta move on from that, but we'll work on that together.  Both 1980's character who probably type-casted their Actor Hosts into oblivion.  Anyway Mr Miyagi might have been a looker in his early years that'd be my guess at least.
    Not a completely terrible idea for a movie.  Prequel with Mr. Miyagi as a kid in Okinawa learning karate from Whoever Taught Him Karate.  And he's friend with the person who goes on to be the actress who plays short Poltergeist lady!  No, no, that's no good.  I was really on board with this idea before I Went Too Far!  Who would play him.  Whose a good Young Asian (/American?) Actor?  Preferably specifically from Okinawa lets get it right.  Okinawa is apparently part of Japan.  I knew they were related but I now know it's 100% in Japan.  Now I Know Lots Of Things!  Thanks To Internet.  Wonder what real nationality Actor Who Played Miyagi Was.  Hmm.  He was American.  Born in California.  Parents were from different part of Japan.  That what his role was in Karate Kid he was the best of both worlds Okinawa & California he helped Danial La Russo learn from Both Cultures.  I'll be back! 

Alright Now I'm Not Here    

    Th.. huh.. wha?  Anyway.  Terrible news-- was just puttin' together my lunch and I spilled a fair amount of soup on Kitchen Counter!  Had to mop that up and crap  Plus it spilled over the Bowl onto the Plate the Bowl was on with The Other Stuff so my bread got soggy with beef barley.  Oddly, tastes pretty good with the hot dog.  I dunno if that's odd.  Maybe its intuitive.  But the point is I lost some soup but on the good side I decreased my Soup Calories by around 25 or so.  That's how I measure calories when I keep track!  Round it off to the nearest 25!  Prove me wrong and show me another way oh right you can't Mine Is The Best Way!
    The good news is That's Over.  The bad news is That's Over.  Anyway I've got the rest of the day Up Until Possible Evening Cooking wide open.  I can read more twitter.  At this point one of my top 3 dozen accounts might have a new tweet!  I noticed tweets are gettin' a lot more likes these days.  I guess that's how Quarantined people are gettin' busy.  More time on Twitter more time LIKING on Twitter.  I don't like the Like Emoji being a Heart.  WOOAHHH I JUST SAID I LIKED IT.  I'M NOT IN LOVE OR ANYTHING.  TWITTER IS MOVING WAAAAAY TOO FAST FOR ME.  Anyway, do kids think in emojis nowadays.  When I was a pre-teen we had the guantlet of AIM smiley faces, and I learned intuitively how to incorporate them into Web Conversation, but it never made such an impression on me that I started THINKING in images of The Aim Smiley Face.  But I feel these days with TEXTS and SOCIAL MEDIAS people might be utilizing emojis beyond what we Responsible Adults Caring About Kids are comfortable with.
    Whatever, I don't care. APP where you can make your own emoji.  And then whenever your texting or social media-ing you can go to your well of SelfMadeEmojis.  That's an idea waiting to pop if Cell Phones and Social Medias could accommodate such an expansion.  I feel like I should be given 2 million dollars Just For That Idea EVEN WITHOUT KNOWING IF ITS FEASIBLE.  Oh well live and learn.  If its feasible I'm goin with fuck that I want TWENTY million dollars.  And then if it turns out It's Feasible But Other Companies Got There First then FUCK THAT I WANT TWO HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS.  And you're like, but, we just said, you can't... and I'm like TWO BILLION DOLLARS!
    Great negotiator.  Penultimate paragraph.  Cool!  I have an irrational fear of accidentally Liking or Retweeting a post on twitter that I had no intention to.  Which is every post.  I don't retweet or like anything I don't play those games.  Oh, and adding someone, that's the worst!  I have to go however many seconds having some bots think I'm 100% on board with this PolitcalGuy/Entertainer/Misc?  I Don't play the games I like to keep my twitter views close to the vest you know how it is.  Anyway looks like we're gettin' to 20 paragraphs this entry, first time in a few days I think.  Awesome!
    That's it.  Great.  Beef Barley I'm still on board with.  All the miscellaneous Chicken Noodle Soups I've grown tired of.  That's how that goes.  Hmm wonder if there's still 2 or 3 Tales From The Crypt I can wa... you know what there's ALL The Tales From The Crypt I Can WATCH It's been over a week for all those great episodes the time is ripe to do it once more!  I guess that's how my quarantine worked out for some reason, maybe kind poetically?  Tales From The Crypt over and over and over again.  Seems pretty appropriate, right?  Also, fun!  Also, INFORMATIVE.  That's gonna be my memory.  Ugh.  Life Well Lived!  I'll see ya'll later.

-2:12 P.M. 

Thursday, May 21, 2020

All These Dream Cigarettes Are Catching Up With Me  
   

    I wish that was a joke.  Last few weeks I've had smoking tobacco cigarettes show up in a dream around 80% of nights.  And then when Day Comes I feel LungCrappy like I just smoked some cigarettes.  Pretty sure I'm not SleepSmoking, someone would have noticed that.  But the point is Dreams Have Too Much Power.  Just ask teenagers who live on Elm Street.  Or Elm Street Adjacent.  Surely not all those teenagers haunted/stalked/killed by Fredrick Krueger lived on the some street!  Same Town maybe but All The Same Street?  I'm not buying it unless for some reason Fred is trapped on Elm Street and not The Rest of Town.  NOT BUYING IT!  Hmm wonder what the town is called I'ma look that up Right Quick.  "Springwood, Ohio."  Not Buying That Either sounds like a made up town.  In fact I'm starting to doubt this is documentary is grounded in reality altogether.
    Is Spring Wood an erection pun?  Is Ohio a Greetings Pun?  Wait do I think not only is Springwood made up but also Ohio?  I dunno I think a lot of things you can't expect me to keep track of every little thing I do or do not think.  Anyway have 2 flavors of soda in fridge at the same time been a while since I had that luxury.  Got some Supermarket To Deal WIth tomorrow morning.  But in the meantime lets enjoy life.  What's going on in life worth enjoying.  Been over 2 months since I started quarantining.  My best guess is I'm over 50% of the way to being able to take walks again.  At least, right, probably?  Maybe not ready to take OTHER STEPS (LOL PUN) but good shot I'll feel comfortable walking by my lonesome wearing a mask.  ALRIGHT!  It's always been my dream to take walks by my lonesome and Wearing A Mask is just the icing on the cake! 
    Hmm I COULD continue writing more paragraphs OR I could take a Hulk Hogan No Holds Barred Break.  I'll flip a coin.  Heads No Holds Tails More Graphs.  Uh oh can't find a coin.  Alright I Find A Coin Hulk Hogan No Holds Barred I Don't Find A Coin More Graphs.  Hmm now how intensely should I look for a coin. If I can only look without getting up from my chair No Way I'm Gonna Find One.  If I move around a bit then the chances I find a coin increases considerably.  Hmm.  What's a fair way to go about this that there's a 50/50 chance I Find A Coin.  Ok, here.  What if I have to stay in my seat, but if I CAN use telekinesis get a coin from somewhere else to me.  Around 50/50 shot I can do that.  Alright lemme look around.  Hold on.  Gotta really try.  Nope Nothin.  Did you imagine me Actually Trying?  Or Just Leading You On?  Write in your answers to whether I actually just mock-tried to use telekinesis by waving my hand to and fro mankindguy@gmail.com.

Meet Myself Half Way  
   

    The last paragraph was originally a continuation of the paragraph before.  As that line of thought grew and grew, it became its own paragraph.  So I wrote One more 'Graph and then took a break.  It's called a Self Compromise ever heard of it?  Anyway I'm back now after a short break.  Chores for the rest of the day, hmm.  Gotta go over Tomorrow Supermarket ORder, that shuoldnt be more than 10 minutes.  Gotta Drink Coffee, that sh... wait that's a Joy not a Chore!  Yeah but I gotta walk all the way down the stairs, through the living room into the kitchen, fuckin' pour the coffee into the mug, nows the real tough part, open 5 Equals ONE AT A TIME to dump in, put in some creamer... ugh KILL ME NOW.
    NO DON'T I WAS JOKING.  Hope I got that message out in time before someone decides to kill me Then.  Well, anyway, what else is going on.  Lunch'll probably be in an hour or so.  Yesterday I skipped lunch!  Just because I had a late breakfast, I wasn't that hungry, and knew I would be having an early dinner on account of making Frenched Toast with Mother, as she and Father like to eat relatively early (we're talkin' It Being Ready For Consumption at around 6:15, 6:30!)  So the point is probably finish that mediocre chili and adequate brown rice for Lunch today!  Then dinner is whatever I want out of the half dozen or so options I have Whenever I Want out of the Time That Exists over the next, let's say, 10 hours.
    So what else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Seeing them debate and whatnot about MLB Baseball Season I've become more aware that Apparently the MLB isn't really financially solvent.  They've been seein' revenue dry up over years and there's a lot of testy people there, even before this CoronaVirus Cancellations.  Fascinating.  Maybe they should air more Video Game Versions of Baseball that's fun.  Because I can actually imagine myself doing it.  I'll never be able to Hit a Baseball even from that batting cage scenario.  But playing a video game?  I may not be at Professional Skill Level Yet but with practice MAYBE! 
    I used to play Command & Conquer: Red Alert II: The Game Where You Fight War Battles By Building Buildings And Tanks And Infantry and Fight Against The Other Persons' Thats.  I played that pretty seriously, probably like 2-4 hours practically every night/day.  This is when I was around 10-13, 14.  And they had leader boards for playing online with thousands of people on the board and several months I was as high on the 'boards as around 50th place or so.  Not Bad!  The bad news is for some reason I stopped pursuing getting better at that and Man Now I Look Like A Fool letting all that innate video game skill go to waste and instead concentrating on HOMEWORK?  WHAT A SAP I WAS.
    Well, what else.  Hmm coffee should be ready now!  I could never understand why cities would pay themselves for 400 million dollar Stadiums for professional sports teams.  And presumably get nothing in return.  Except for theoretically more cashflowrevenuemoney as people visit the stadium presumably from intra and outra-city.  I could never understand a lot of things!  Thwas was just one of them, hmm what else could I never understand.  Wasn't I gonna go pour myself some coffee.  Yeah I Was!  You know what?  I'm going To Go Do That RIGHT NOW!  Anyway gonna have a Late Lunch in a little bit but its okay because its a relatively small portion of lunch AND it means NO MORE CRAP CHILI!
    Chili Davis, remember him?  We had a discussion about him a week or three ago.  I feel like he was a DH, maybe originally a 1B.  DH means designated hitter.  In The American League of Baseball, instead of having Baseball Pitchers Hit At The Bat, you get to pick someone to be the, "Designated Hitter," so every time the pitcher would be up to Play Hitting The Baseball With The Basebat, it's the, "DH."  And he does no fielding.  Anyway Chillard Davis.  Ugh gonna continue this in a second but Fred Willard is dead and I'm not happy about it!  Ok Chilly Davis.  HMM NO he was an Outfielder before becoming a DH in the mid 90's.  Which you must excuse me for not knowing I only became intimately familiar with the Baseballers around the late 1990's!
    10th paragraph?  How the Hell did I get here.  Last 2 months, whenever someone notable dies, I assume you all, like me, quickly think CORONA OR NOT.  Dunno why it really matters but GOTTA KNOW!  Anyway we still don't know but it looks like my Estimate of Everyone With Today's Birthday Dies Covid death toll may be being avoided!  I would refine my own personal guess, at least.  But the point is what can ya do.  Just gotta keep healthy keep your family healthy keep Major League Baseball Solvent Spend More Hundreds of Millions of Tax Payer Money for Sports Stadiums That Won't Return The Revenue.
    I think I remember reading the new Stuyvesant High School Building (new in around 1990 or so? lemme check that out right quick-- opened in 1992) was like 10 million dollars.  Cause its a nice fancy building in a very expensive area with 10 floors and a bunch of escalators and elevators and whatnot.  But now that  I think about it that's pretty cheap for such a venture.  Maybe it was more?  Lemme check that out right quick.  Hmm.  150 million.  It was, actually.  THAT SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT.  he At the time you could probably get a Sports Stadium for only twice that.  So the point is I was in the Major Leagues of High school.  And I was a solid utility player.  What was my specialty?  I dunno hmm lemme think about that.
    Couldn't play multiple positions, that's one mark of a good utility player.  Not very fast, can't be a pinch runner.  No good at Drawing Walks, hitting for average or for power.  OH I KNOW.  The team had only 24 players before me so they needed me to be a legal team ready to play games.  That's why my nick name was, "Twenty Five!"  Anyway what else is going on and crap.  Also based on the 6 seconds I spent researching, I think the 150 mil was on the building itself and not to pay for the property.  I think they got that for free.  By the way that there expensive property, it's downtown financial district 2 or 3 blocks away from the Late World Trade Centers.  And presumably the New World Trade Center.  How's that new world trade center been working out, haven't heard much about it lately.  Hanging in there I hope.  Yup One World Trade Center opened for business November 2014 STILL STANDING that's what I like to hear!  Anyway gonna take a break.  Be back soon!

My Crazy Website  
   

    Presumably 3 more paragraphs for a total of 15 paragraphs for the entry.  That's how things might work in some sort of ideal world.  What to do with the rest of my day.  Been spending too much time on Twitter last few days.  There's a couple of dozen accounts I like to keep my eye on but I don't need to circle through them constantly.  Once a day would be ideal.  But I get bored I WONDER WHAT NATE SILVERS GOT FOR US AND EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY THE BETTER STATISTICIANS I CAN GET TO FROM NATE SILVER'S PAGE.  Well, great, what else.  I used to be all about FiveThirtyEight.  At some point though ENUOGH IS EHOUGH.
     Not sure what that means.  2 paragraphs to go!  Also Twitter changed their format/algorithms a few weeks ago so that the Finding Other People From Original Person isn't as smooth and accurate as it was before.  I blame CoronaVirus but that's just one man's opinion.  Looks like some private colleges are planning on Regular In Person Semester for Fall.  I hope not CUNY cause My Dad can teach ONLINE but he won't risk IN PERSON because he cares about his Health and Longevity.  It's a good thing we didn't end up with free college because suddenly WHAT'S IT WORTH? THERE IS NO COLLEGE WHATTA SCAM.
    I dunno why I do this.  One more paragraph to go.  Maybe finally resume No Holds Barred.  That's what Hollywood Hogan would want from me.  Is it possible that there's a worse/least sympathetic character in The Wire than Scott Templeton: The Reporter Who Makes Things Up.  Clay Davis, at least him Ya Love To Hate.  Scot Templeton is just a big fat Negative Zero.  Not only does he make stuff up and completely fail as a journalist BUT HE THINKS HE'S A GOOD JOURNALIST!  And that he should be moving up in the journalism world!  This guy is MAD maybe he should get a job at MADTV!  THEY PROBABLY WOULDN'T EVEN HAVE HIM HAH.  Maybe I should get a job at MADTV.  Maybe MADTV May or May Not still exist.  On further research, It doesn't.  SORRY TEMPLETON YOU'RE OUT OF OPTIONS.  I'll see you guys later.

-2:54 P.M.

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

The Titles-- Every Title-- They All Matter!  
   

    I suppose so in some sort of vaguely alternative universe.  How do we know the universe identifies as a universe.  Maybe it considers itself a multiverse.  Incorrectly.  But THAT'S THE UNIVERSES'S decision!  So the point is Here I Am again for another entry.  Having taken only 1 Ritalin-- which is exactly what I'm sposed to do.  Lets see how that plays out.  Are we part of the universe.  Maybe that's how I identify.  Not as an individual person but as  The Universe myself.  That's why my WWE name will be The Universe.  And its also why my finishing move would be to slide between the legs of the person 2x my size and then somehow grab their torso from beneath and PIN 'EM.  I feel I would be very effective with such a move so much so that I would win every match Vince McMahon and the StoryWriters want me to win!  A solid 10/10 matches they want me to win I WILL.  No Bailing Out on live TV and going against the script! 
    Started watching No Holds Barred: The Wrestling Movie on that Free Tubi Service and HEY I'M ON BOARD WITH THIS MOVIE!!  How come Hulk Hogan, probably born in 1950 or so (lemme check that up right quick-- 1953!!!) aAmd this movie was from 1989-- so he was 35--- and presumably other people interpreted his appearance as a regular young man-- but to me this guthis guy looks like he's 63.  Muchly because of his moustache and hair style.  But he doesn't look like someone my age I DON'T GET IT.  WELL SURELY SOME HOLDS ARE BARRED.  Nope!  No holds barred.  WHAT THE HELL YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!
    Who was the guy who decided I think our fans will be on board with us abandoning the Real Sport Wrestling Concept and just have people hit each other with chairs and throw people off of Hells In The Cells.  Because in retrospect that guy was a genius but also presumably a very sick individual.  My favorite Wrestling Move, which I think was one of the most common moves early on and still happens now and then, is just hitting the guy on the top of the head. And it's usually done half a dozen times in succession.  That's the move.  BOOM PUNCH SLAM ON YER HEAD.  Veerrry Theatrical.  Well, great, what else is going on.  I feel like I used to watch every episode of The Hulk Hogans: Reality TV Edition back a decade and a half ago or whenever.  I feel like I used to do a lot of things that I used to do! 

What's The Matter Again?!  
   

    I guess.  Starting to get acclimated to life without booze.  Still not as good.  In a lot of different ways.  But also Better in a couple ways.  Overall there's a deficit of about 3-4 ways where It's Negative Overall.  I Did The Math So You Don't Have To!  Anyway TOPIC people are concerned with Baby's Weight When Born.  Does Mother's Diet Throughout Pregnancy Affect Baby Weight?  Lets go to the phones I wanna hear your opinion on this.  That's a good premise for a Call In Show.  You talk about science or math or something Definite and then you say lets go to the phones I wanna hear your opinion and just let people say wrong stuff.  I feel America is ready for such a show.  Ready as it'll ever be.
    So, great, what else.  Had 1 cup of coffee-- leftover from when My Mom Made It earlier.  Now making my own pot.  It's called being Responsible ever hear of it?  Lets go to the phones.  The point is I was underweight as a Newborn so I had to stay in Hospital for a few days without Mama.  Never called her Mama in my life.  ITS ABOUT TIME.  Wonder if that has any effect on someone's life.  Separated from mother for maybe even close to a week.  Hmm I wonder LETS GO TO THE PHONES ABOUT IT.  There should be some sort of process in hospital where Momma can give birth and then take a look at Baby and be like yea this isn't what I was picturing, changed my mind, you take it. And hospital is like alright well there's some forms you have to fill out it's a relatively intense procedure.  But it's win/win//win.  Anyway.  I dunno why my parents rely on me to always answer front door.  Which is very often.  Probably 2-3 deliveries a day ON AVERAGE NO JOKE ACCURATE ESTIMATION.  They can open doors c'mon what's the dealio.
    I feel kinda jipped that I haven't gotten to wear a mask yet.  I feel like I might get a chance in a couple of weeks, I really need to get some blood work done for one reason or another (well, one reason.  Lemme tell you right quick even though I have before.  take a medication where blood work needs to be done regularly cause it could negatively impact it) so hopefully then I can wear a mask.  SOMEBODY STOP ME.  Anyway, jeez.  Pizza Lunch yesterday was great may do it again today.  Chili/Rice dinner wasn't so great it was Vegetarian Chili and that may have been why it wasn't so great or maybe another reason but the point is Not So Great.  I had gotten another kind of canned chili that was pretty good but this kind No Es Bueno!   
 

What's Going On Again
   

    I guess I might finish ChiliConRice for lunch just to get it out of my life for good!  Well, I dunno.  Catching up on Podcasts slowly.  Making progress in The Wire.  a 3rd thing.  Oh.  Everything Else.  That's the 3rd thing.  Podcasts, The Wire, and Everything Else.  Name of my podcast.  I stole the ending from a Past Real World Podcast.  I steal lots of stuff from podcasts.  Anyway, looks like I'm gonna be getting a new phone soon.  Current Phone's Phoning Capabilities have been compromised.  Everything else works except for the placing and/or answering calls.  Oh man I hope my new phone is better in some very small un-useful way.  Like maybe have half a dozen more Stock Backgrounds.  Well that sounds pretty useful to me.  Jeez.  I'd have a drink in a second is the point but I'm survivin' without it!
    Three paragraphs to go to make an even 10!  Been going to sleep later the last few days.  We're talkin' actually falling asleep around 10:30, 11:00 as opposed to around 8:30, 9:00.  That's roughly 2 hours later!  Pretty much exactly 2 hours later!  On average!  I crunched the numbers and everything!  So, great, what else.  Figure I'll have lunch in roughly a paragraph and a half.  That's how I keep time during the early afternoon.  By paragraphs.  I challenge you to Show me a better way!  Possibility Frenched Toast is in the cards for tonight.  I'd say probably a 1/3 chance. 
    I dunno.  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  Not a lot all things considered.  Been refined into the Wide South Korea Of Sports.   thought South Korea was hit hard by Covid wtf why do they have sports.  Maybe their athletes are TOUGHER than ours.  They play RAIN OR SHINE.  EXCEPT FOR RAIN IF ITS RAINING TOO HARD NOBODY WANTS TO CATCH COLD C'MON BE REASONABLE.  Watched an early episode of British Whose Line Is It Anyway and not ONE OF THE FOUR PEOPLE FEATURED WERE ANYONE WE KNOW.  Colin is making a mockery of this show, Ryan has got Style, though.  Greg is good with the Props game and... Wayne Brady is.. American, he's not on these... but he does complete that Bunch of improvisers.  I'd like to subscribe to IMPROV MONTHLY and see a nice profile on Colin Mochrie.  I'd like to do lots of things.
    You could argue that all those other 3 people were American as well, as they may be, but they still were on the original British version for some reason while Wayne Brady... might have been???  It's possible.  I DON'T HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS.  Oh hey I still got 2/3rds of No Holds Barred to go.  Hulk Hogan is a 75 year old man in a very muscular body.  I just had a great idea for WWE have a prolonged storyline involving the referees.  They might have done that before.  I feel like that was a thing, you could watch people training to be referees or something and its like a reality-contest show.  Either that already happened or That's My Idea Make It Happen.  Sums up my life pretty well.  Either it already happened or Hey Maybe I Thought Of It!  See ya later.

-3:23 P.M.   

Tuesday, May 19, 2020

Lemme Title This Up Right Quick   
   

    I don't mean to alarm you, but I have two standard Coffee Cups I use (for coffee!) and neither are ready for use right now.  Big Tall White Castle Mug still in Kitchen Sink!  Standard Black Coffee Mug Artists 4 Bernie Sanders or Somethin' Like that (Not the official Text of Logo But Probably Should Be!) also in Kitchen sink.  Gotta go with a standard Brown Coffee Mug we've got half a dozen of.  Is this even Coffee if its not an advertisement for 1 of 2 of my favorite things?  White Castle and Bernie Sanders?  Well, I guess this mug is an advertisement for Brown.  I like brown.  Not one of my favorite things but it's in the top 20% all things considered!
    What percent of people recognize Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle is some sort of Racial Pun.  Because Harold is Asian American and Kumar is Indian American I believe.  Maybe Pakistani!  Maybe Sri Lankan!  I'ma look that up right quick.  Hmm, AS ODD AS IT MAY BE, in the Wikipedia Synopsis it doesn't just say, "Harold (WHO IS ASIAN AMERICAN) and Kumar (LETS SAY INDIAN AMERICAN?)"... and so on.  But anyway White Castle is The Film Industry and/or America as a whole.  Harold and Kumar are Breakin' Down The Wall To Our Country White Castle AND AUDIENCES CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF IT!!!!
    Huh.  My dad's name is Harold.  Spoiler Alert!!!  Uh-huh.  How come I was fine with just calling Harold, "Asian American," but wasn't fine with just calling Kumar, "South-Asian-American."  Kumar's racial background merits special consideration where as Harold's doesn't?  Seems like a pretty big fuck-up.  This is gonna haunt me for the rest of my LifeCareer!  Anyway had some Real Fresh Dinner last night it was Great.  We're talkin' 2 nice slices of Turkey Meatloaf and a bunch of these spheres of Potato.  Kinda like Pellets but 8x the size.  And Just Made Out of Potato with spices and herbs.  So I had that going for me is the point.  Lunch today is probably finally 1/2 can of chili with ~6 oz of Steamed African American Rice.  Was originally gonna say South-Asian American Rice  but I made y choice and I will live with it.  Brown rice might be indigenous to South-Asian Countries.  So if I had said that you'd be like yup makes sense.
    Whys the Castle Gotta Be White.  Who Comes Up With This Stuff!  Also now that I think about it almost every Big Fast Food Chain is reliant upon a Heavily Marketed Spokesman and/or are explicitly named for their Leader.  Wendy's-- a variant, Dave Thomas' Daughter name was Wendy.  McDonalds-- Clown named Ronald runs the show.  Burger King-- I don't know his full name but presumably there's a Burger King running the show.  KFC-- Colonial Sanders.  HMM, HAMBURGERS?  RUN BY A CLOWN?  NOW YOU'VE GOT MY ATTENTION!!  HMM CHICKEN SANDWICHES?  RUN BY A GUY WHO HAD A DAUGHTER?  ALRIGHT WHY NOT.  HMM FRENCHED FRIES MADE BY A SELF PROCLAIMED BURGER KING?  I'D BE MORE COMFORTABLE IF HE WAS A FRENCHED FRY KING BUT BEGGARS CAN'T BE CHOOSERS.
    Right.  Sometimes I fantasize about a Marijuana Future.   A future where I smoke marijuana.  Glad I had an opportunity to clear that up with you.  I even think in weeks or months when I can start relaxing Quarantining, just be like alright parental units I'm just gonna get 2 beers at a time that way you know I'm not overdoing it.  Anyway.  I gotta stay quarantined more than many of you people on account of living with elderly people who have various preconditions.  Such is life!  I always like being productive and Not Killing My Parents Each Day is a pretty simple and obvious way to be productive.  That's how I feel about things these days!  I was thinking about my age and I have 3 and a half more years As A Young Man.  I know in TV they say best demographic is 18-34.  I'll be in there for 3.5 more years Sweet!  But also oh man I'm gonna be Legally Middle Aged in less than 4 years NO ES BUENO. 
    Also I dunno where I picked this up or if I just made it up but the age of 35 years old just always seemed like a turning point.  Maybe because I was unconsciously aligned with TV Sub-Demographics.  I wouldn't put it past me!  On the other hand they also measure TV/Ad demographics as 18-49.  Which I'm on board with I got almost a full TWO DECADES of that nonsense.  Man oh man.  That's how I've been conceptualizing the rest of my life lately-- in decades.  Born Dec 1988, I'm only 1 year off from having my Age Decade corresponding with Actual Calendar Decades.  So 2020's are my 30's, 2030's are my 40's, and so on.  Which is fun because I'm like man in the 2040's I'm gonna be a relatively young Middle Aged man!!!  AND I'VE GOT 2 DECADES TO FUCK AROUND even BEFORE I get to that point!
    Also presumably at some point America will stop seeing its Average Fatality Age Decline and get back to an INCREASING rate.  I'd like to see some movement in the positive direction!  Climate Change might muck that up, though.  In fact it almost definitely will.  To a very large extent in America and even Way More in Developing Countries!   Great just wonderful.  The good news is, I dunno.  What else is going on and crap.  Also gotta think about starting a family when plotting out Life and Whatnot.  That's bound to happen sooner or later!  Anyway, Parents had me when they were 40.  I kinda never liked it, felt like my parents were pooped out by the time I showed up.  But if I see my mortality rate a few years more than my parents were/are at, I think having a kid up to around age 40-42 is perfectly reasonable.  PERFECTLY reasonable.
    Also presumably at some point I will move on from this nonsense.  Good news I started The Wire back up so I'll probably make a clean break with that in a few days.  Last Season can be Pretty Good depending on your mindset.  It can seem like a huge departure from past seasons in terms of it being kinda rediculous, or it could seem like they're continuing their track record of making larger points and whatnot.  See sometimes cops fake homeless killers It's A Story B-more has seen time and time again.  The point is, I've told you many times, I used to confuse Baltimore with Cleveland.  And I mean into being a teenager and even possibly an adult.  Particularly in the concept of baseball teams.  Baltimore Orioles and Cleveland Indians, who can tell the difference??!?  Cleveland were the franchise in Major League.  Yes all top professional baseball teams are in the Major Leagues what's your point.  The film franchise.  OH OK I'M TIRED OF THIS NONSENSE.
    Also, you're not gonna believe this-- My Mom's name is Kumar.  Also, you're totally going to believe this-- I should have said that 6 paragraphs ago.  Well, great, what else is going on.  Was talkin' about Supposed ways of MLB doing a Baseball this year.  Anyway.  THere was a good 5-10 years of Baseball where I completely lost touch with it and couldn't identify probably 80% of players who I didn't already know from the mid 2000's at the latest.  But over the last few years I've gotten slightly more immersed to the point I could have a RESPECTABLE draft in Fantasy Baseball.  Not Great RESPECTABLE. 
    Anyway.  10th paragraph already!  Today is goin' swell, real swell.  And only 60% of this is stuff I'd said before!  And only 60% of the remaining 40% is totally wothless!  That's, what, 10 or 20 % or so that's worthwhile?  Lemme Calculator that up Right Quick.  .24.  24% of this entry, according to those paramters, is Worthwhile.  Right Quick.  ROUNDS UP TO 1 out of 4 THINGS I Like THOSE ODDS!  Cool.  Well, what is in the cards for meals.  I think I already told you about lunch.  Breakfast was a FRozen Breakfast Sandwich Made Warm Through The Magic Of Microwave Powers.  Dinner?  I dunno probably not a communal thing though because my Dad is teaching tonight starting at 6:30 so we'd have to make a Communal Dinner Real Early! 
    Well, great.  My Mom was really on board with Joker.  You know how Moms are, right?!?  After talking to me and my Brother separately about Nolan Bros Batman movies, she freakin' binge watched all 3 last night.  Which she says she liked but not as much as Joker But II Know she's just being polite SHE HATED THEM.  But she watched all 8 hours of it JUST TO BE NICE.  Mom was telling me one of her favorite movies, if not her favorite, is One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.  And that she liked Joker because its also in the theme of mentally ill people.  And I of course had the tought hmm is My Mom's affection for Mentally Ill People/Storylines somehow related to ME BEING MENTALLY ILL? And I supressed that tohught deep down inside because the truth is horrifying.  Horrifying!  Nah just kidding i don't THINK it's related.  But it could be and that 24% chance is Horrifying Or Something For Some Reason!
    Or maybe its just that my Mom liked those storyline/characters because she was mentally ill in one way or another.  And it got passed on genetically.  Lots of Horrifying Possibilities here but I will let go ot talking about them for now.  Anyway here's GREAT news I got 40 cents on Poker!  I only need to somehow increase that to 80 cents in aw ay I don't know how to have enough for a minimum buy in at the cheapest table possible!  Hey 12th paragraph.  And I ain't even needed to take no break no way no how yet!  Bad news is Dunno At All what to have for dinner Good news is Possibilities are wide open!  Well probably 8 or 10 legit possibilities!  One thing I thought of was have a reasonable portion of Frozen Pizza.  That's possibly in the cards!  Speaking of taking breaks-- I'm gonna take a break!  Be back in a little bit.

What's Gotten Into Me Today?!?!?   
   

    It's called 3 Ritalin at once!  Dammit meant to say spoiler alert.  Well, now that I ruined the mystery behind why is this entry the best one in a few days.  Because of abusing Drugs!  Again, more evidence to be used in my Reverse Intervention.  Anyway I was thinking about it and if they do have a shortened MLB season they should not let players 75 and over play.  I know it sucks and seems unfair but I'm just thinking about the health consequences.  Based on the few stats I've seen without really paying attention I think its possible there are more CoronaDeaths in 75 and over than in everyone else.  Or maybe about the same.  Or maybe slightly less.  But it's something extreme like that!
    Hey great news MY PARENTS ARE ONLY 72.  But they got some real sweet pre-existing conditions oh boy you ain't ever seen pre-existing conditions like that ones these people got.  Also saw Biden is beating Trump with elderly voters but losing with young people.  Which is a reverse of how Dem/GOP votes usually go!  My feeling is Sanders is gonna give a Great Virtual Speech in Cleveland/Baltimore/Milwaukee/I Wanna Say UTICA? and then young people are like OH NOW I SEE ALRIGHT I'M TOTES ON BOARD!  But it takes two to tango Biden gotta give up some love to Bernie!  Anyway, I dunno anymore.  What paragraph are we into.
    Is it possible this entry is as bad as the last few ones?  Sure!  But I'm On Uppers for the next hour or three so I'll be None The Wiser.  Anyway, 15th paragraph.  Maybe have Pizza For Lunch and Other Thing for dinner.  Maybe lots of stuff!  I shouldn't have Pulled Back The Curtain about the Ritalin.  A little too Inside Baseball.  Ya see what I do is take different kinds of substances to help me get into different kinds of head spaces.  Like have you heard the good news about Coffee?  People are on board with doing that with that.  I'm just taking it a step further!  And other people may take it 10 steps further I'm Only Taking It 2 or 3 Steps Further At Most!  But yeah, real break now.  Last break was like 15 minutes  REAL break this time C'mon GET PUMPED. Oh right, the reason I had to return so quickly was because I thought of that, "Joke," about MLB players 75 and over.  Had To Get That One Down On Paper Immediately!  Is this paper?  Not literally but based on the Name of Website you could make an argument!  Oh also I'm messin' around I'm more focused and whatnot but I'm not HIGH or anything.  I'm adopting a Relatively HIGH character for these 3 paragraphs but that's all it is!  I'm Doin' Just Ok Dontchu Worry Bout Me.

Let Me Put My Titling Hat On   
   

    One of my main hats.  One of my least favorite hats.  Lately, at least.  I feel like I get into grooves where I'm Totally Into And On Board With Doin' Some Titling.  Not now, though.  I know the titles are no good and I can't do anything about it!  Anyway let me put my Crazysheet Hat on.  One of my main hats.  In the top 2 or 3 Generic Hats I have for, as well, at least since I stopped doing open mics stopped happening.  Maybe even since I stopped doing The Uppers.  Which is freakin' 5 years at this point!  Anyway I had a dream last night, last dream of Sleep and slightly into Waking Up, how I could get on track back into GuitarMind.  Basically just pluck two adjacent strings over and over, just changing holding down the fret one at a time.  Like...

-0123456789101112
-0000000000 O O O
-x
-x
-x
-x

-0123456789101112
-1111111111 1 1 1
-x
-x
-x
-x

Hmm if you don't know how to read tablature google it up right quick.  Not too complicated to understand

    THe idea being that even when I was good at guitar I was never very good at Solo-ing.  Not good at doing a 2 or more string Guitar Sounds that wasn't just chords.  Either 1 note melodies or chords.  There's playing to be done between those, though!  And I could start off real slow and stupid, and over time Slow and Stupid becomes Slow and Hey Not So UnSmart!  Google says melody is A Sequence of SINGLE Notes that sounds satisfying.  What I'm describing is Harmony. Agree to disagree!  I insist you can have multiple note melodies and Harmonies are JUst Something Else!  Maybe a Harmelody is what I'm looking for, that's what I Call it!  What did Elody ever do to you that you should harm it UHehHuhehH.

Let Me Put My What's Wrong With My Titling Hat Is It Doing Okay? On   
   

    Because these titles are worse than the pits.  Anyway I'd probalby be slowly losing w eight if not for coffee and orange juice.  We're talkin 300 calories a day I'd say, more or less, between Coffee (+Creamer) and Orange Juice (Orange Juice).  I water down the Orange Juice but Not Enough I guess!  Speaking of watering down Life Hack my Mom adds Water to Beat Egg in French Toast.  Gives that French Toast that extra watery flavor those who are are always looking for.  Her French Toast is good I got no complaints.  Anyway I'm fine with Challah as bread for a sandwich but I'm not on board with cutting slices myself.  Hard enough to keep it steady and get a nice clean cut of Bread-- getting a slice that's not Way Too Thick is damn near impossible!  Unless you got a machine to do it!  I'm in the market for such a machine!  Cut things nice and quick, good sharp cutter, I'm in the market!
    ~19th paragraph.  Figure 20 is the way to go.  On further inspection there are only 4 Free Interventions.  Which could be a whole lot better, there shuold be dozens!  But 4 isn't that bad.  Exponentially better than 2!  The exponent in that equation is 2.  See I Told Ya!  Probs gonna have the Frozen Pizza for lunch in an hour or so.  Save that there ChiliRice for dinner or something.  Or skip lunch.  It's 2:43 and I'm not that hungry.  Ya know, probably on account of the uppers.  Hey I saw that there are plcaes in NYC where anyone who wants a free Covid Test can get one!  I need to study up before I take my test might as well do some online exercises and get some sort of Textbook/Workbook Combo but at some point I'm interested.
    Well, that'll just about do it.  Tomorrow will I take more Ritalin?  I think maybe try Only Two.  That's only Not... exponent... 2x... It's One Less Than Today!  So great I presumably will take the first of 10,000 steps towards getting back into guitar.  Or at least the first .1's of steps.  I can see me doing some Decimal Amount of One Full Step!  Hmm.  Used the word, "Challah," a few paragraphs ago, I see.  Ain't No Challah Back Girl.  Well, great, still not that hungry for lunch, gettin' relatively late into the afternoon, maybe just skip lunch!  But that's not being a responsible adult.  Adults have 3 meals a day I don't care what the circumstances are!  But, yeah, huh?  Wha?  I'll see ya later.

-2:48 P.M.
     

Monday, May 18, 2020

Google What Are My Lyrics?   
   

    Well, great.  Spoiler Alert-- I know I have some sort of audience because if I google crazysheet net the cache (freeze frame of the website at 1 moment in time) it has is always at most a few days behind.  Which means that at least Google Is Constantly Checking Out My Website.  Which to me is Good Enough.  Anyway Google now that I got your attention What Are My Lyrics.  I've thought at least a dozen times over the years oh yeah I got some lyric like that.. how does the rest of it go... what song was it in... and my instinct is to Google it but apparently Google Gives No Fucks About My Lyrics.
    Oh well such is life.  Anyway Brand New Day.  Compared to yesterday.  And If you're Reading Google Presenting This Day To A You, A Googler, It May Be Two Days In The Future For You.  How is it not common knowledge that Google is a pun for porn.  Go Ogle.  I've mentioned it a dozen times here and its about time its caught on with the general public.  And that's like the most valuable company in the word.  A Pornography/Merely "Hot" Pictures/Videos Pun.  Anyway if I had a company would catchy name would I give it. FancyFeast.  And it's a company about cat food.  And for some reason it didn't already exist.  But I knew it existed in an alternate universe. That's where I got the idea from.
    Cats need Neither Fancy Things nor Feasts.  I mean if a Cat is stuffing itself with its meals No Bueno Unhealthy Cat Diet it's got there!  Also sometimes the fanciest feasts are the ones you would least expect.  Like in Indiana Jones where the Jesus Cup is the most plain cup.  Sometimes the fanciest feasts are from the plainest cat food... bowl...  What was I talking about again?  How do they decide the exact percentage that Dog/Cat Food is in Quality compared to Humans.  I mean all in all its a similar diet, but for pets its less quality, right?  So what's the percent.  Do they go alright pets deserve around 50% the quality we give humans.  Or is it like nah closer to 10%.  Or maybe 80%!  I can't even just trust the brand name Fancy Feast and be like OH WELL CLEARLY THEY'RE THE HIGHEST QUALITY JUST LOOK AT THE NAME!  There's no accountability to the name.  Sure I want my cat to have the fanciest feast possible but I don't know how to go about ensuring that!
    Try the cat food yourself.  Doesn't sound like an ideal situation but it may be your best option all things considered.  You gotta ask yourself how much Do You Love Your Cat?  Enough to try different cat foods yourself and then be like Oh Well Clearly THIS ONE Is The Best?  Cause if not YOU'RE NO BUENO IN TERMS OF FRIEND AND CATERER TO YOUR CAT.  Anyway when I had a cat we just fed her pellets.  Looked like Cocoa Pebbles if I recall.  No fancy feasts at all.  And I AM NOT gonna taste come Cat Pellets not on purpose at least!  I could be easily fooled into tasting them if you just said they were cocoa puffs, even though I've never had cocoa puffs and even they seem kinda gross to me, I might be willing to TRY cocoa puffs, and I might be willing to TRY cat food pellets, and I.. uh... what was I talking about?
    Cool!  Got some FreshDirect last night with a couple of Legit FreshMeals.  We got some Turkey Meatloaf PROBABLY IN THE CARDS FOR TONIGHT OR TOMORROW got some Roasted Potato Type Spheres PROBABLY A SIDE FOR THE TURKEY MEATLOAF got some "Loaded," Potato Salad AIN'T FOR ME SEEMS GROSS and got some STEAMED BROWN RICE HOLLA THATS ALL MINE GONNA HAVE HALF THE PORTION WITH HALF A CAN OF CHILI then REPEAT ProCEsSS AGAIN A FEW DAYS AFTER.  Not 100% sure wy its safe to eat Prepard meals from FreshDirect but not from random Delivery Place From Real Life but I trust my parents judgment in most things.  Is there a way we could train cats to go to the supermarket for us.  Cause if so we could save a lot of money on giving Big Tips to delivery people.  I think people working as delivery people these days have Got It Too Good what with their standard 20% tips even among people who would normally give 15%. They're livin' large ugh I hate it so much.  Well, wonderful.  Gonna take a break now.

I Prefer Entries To Titles   
   

    It may not show but that's how I feel deep down.  Anyway it turns out all you need to go is Google, "Title of whatever movie yuo want" Full Movie and half the time its up there on Youtube or some Free App!  It's insane!  And by half the time I mean it worked 2 out of 4 times for me.  And those 2 times were a very similar genre of movie-- semi-obscure horror movies from the 1980's but RELATIVELY mainstream compared to more obscure horror movies from the 1980's.  One was on Youtube!  THe other was on, lemme make sure I get this correct, "Tubi."  I don't know what it is but its like a netflix apparently and its for free apparently!  Get the word out on Tubi it did me a solid by letting me watch this movie I have on DVD but DVDs don't work on my computer and I don't have a TV hooked Up!  Tubitv.com!  Presumably there's even Other Movies besides Return of the Living Dead I!  That'd be my guess!  Hey I'ma check that up right now right quick.  WHAT HTE HELL THEY JUST HAVE A BUNCH OF MOVIES AND ITS ALL FREE I BELIEVE.
    Well that's your Solid for the day.  I did you a nice Solid with that suggestion and now we're even.  What solid did you do for me. Well nothing yet but I anticipate roughly One Solid over the course of the day I'll give you credit for that Future Solid for now.  OH MAN THEY'VE GOT INTERVENTION: THE DOCUSERIES WHERE YOU ENJOY OTHER PEOPLE ABUSING DRUGS!!! And then presumably there's some intervention I Dunno I stop watching 2/3rds in NOT INTERESTED.  Anyway my life has just been rescued from the baragain bin with this TubiTV.com!  PAY IT FORWARD tell 3 people YOU know about TubiTV.com and eventually all our karma will be Right!  Gonna take another break!
 

WHERE'S MY REVERSE INTERVENTION?!!?   

    WHERE'S MY REVERSE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD I?!?!  I'm just waiting for a person(s) of authority to sit me down and be like you're a better person when you drink every day lets get you the help you need.  I'm also just waiting for... zombies to NOT Be... zombies... some sort of reverse GraveYard Setting... uh... not sure how all that would work...  ANYWAY.  I was finishing watching Joker this morning and with further introspection I like a Smart and Savvy Joker as opposed to an Emotionally Retarded and Random-Acting Joker.  Maybe this is how Joker starts out and over time being Joker he becomes more intelligent, emotionally and strategically and even, lets face it, Comically.  I dunno.  But that's a GOOD joker.  The joker whose always one step ahead!  The joker who just is a weirdo and does random things?  I can do without that joker!
    WHERE'S MY REVERSE JOKER.  Sounds like a sex position.  Wonderful.  Anyway not gonna lie to you the Main Cookie we've had in stock in the pantry the last month or so are Vanilla Oreos.  It's Oreos but instead of chocolate CookieOutside its Vanilla!  Did I really need to explain that.  I feel like its pretty intuitive what Vanilla Oreos would mean.  Such is life thuogh, we never know, can't be too careful.  Maybe have some Chili Con Arroz for lunch today.  Maybe just a turkey sandwich con... something else...  The point is after this paragraph 1 gonna take a Real Break.  No 20 minute breaks we're talking a Legit Break.  Be back so... uhh... relatively soon I guess!

Entertaining To Some   

    That'd be my neutral-positive 1 line review for anything I've done.  Right?  10th paragraph.  This'll be the last section-- who knows how many paragraphs though!  Anyway I can see myself getting into some Interventions.  I can see myself eating lunch seeing how I have already started!  Lets cover it quickly Chicken Noodle Soup + Open Faced MidShelf Turkey On Thick Challah Bread.  And Pepsi Zero.  So what else is up.  Read a few pages of some book I got from some English class in college.  EZRA POUND: ABC OF READING: THE BOOK.  I think Ezra Pound was some sort of poet but this book is about How To Read.  And I read some random pages where he talks about Shakespeare and Chaucer and a 3rd and 4th reference I had never even heard of.  And the point is shouldn't this be the type of stuff I Learned Majoring In English In a Fullout, RealTime College?  Probably!  The price of college goes up while the learning done goes down.  Someone should write a book about it.  Called ABC Always Be College.  I'm done.

-3:15 P.M.

Sunday, May 17, 2020

Something?!?  More Like SOMETHING ELSE!   
   

    Was just re-watching Joker This Time on TV and I was like Joker?  I've seen this guys stand up MORE LIKE CHOKER.  Now whose the joker.  So great, what else.  Anyway in about 90 minutes I will collaborate with my Dad to do two chores-- replace one of the light bulbs in my room (on account of it not producing light anymore) and then go into the attic change vents so air conditioning works (because it's warmer these days for some reason no one is really sure of).  Is it just me or does It Being Warmer add another level of quarantine frustration?  Presumably you've got some windows open and/or can tell its nice and toasty outside some other way.  And even if you would never leave your house anyway you gotta be thinking WOW OUTSIDE I COULD HAE FUN RUN AND PLAAY maybe do a Roller Blade.
    Oh well such is life.  What if I got roller blades and just roller bladed around the neighborhood when this is over.  Just a 31 year old roller blade-ing waving at the adults as I pass them by.  Anyway got some coffee goin' ya'll know what that's like.  Also I said I saw Jokers Material and More Like Choker which is accurate in that In That One Set In Particular He Choked Cause Audience Wasn't On Board but he had 2 relatively decent jokes!  Are we supposed to pretend those 2 jokes aren't adequate?  I used to hate school, and my Mom said its better than having to work for a living, but I said I was gonna be a comedian! (phrased even better than I did) SOLID.  They laughed at me when I said I would be a comedian But NOBODIES LAUGHING NOW!  SOLID. 
    Anyway if only Joker was into Roller Blades instead of hurting people that movie would be a lot more positive and family friendly.  I think its a negative thing to have all these alternate universes of Characters all the time.  Over the past 30 years there have been, what, 6 or so different Joker Stories in major motion pictures?  And the context for each of them is the Implied Joker we know from comics and/or old live action show and/or cartoons and/or previous movies.  But at some point it just gets confusing.  Those contexts start to fade into each other and away and now its just Too Much!  Too Many Jokers!
    I mean, the first Batman movie in over a decade, WOW SO THIS IS BATMAN AND HOW BATMAN GOES I NEVER WOULDA THOUGHT IT.  A decade later with 4 different Batmans over that time span OH WELL THIS IS JUST 1 INTERPRETATION I DON'T HAEV TO BUY IN COMPLETELY BECAUSE NEXT YEAR IT'LL BE A NEW THING ANYWAY.  Way to ruin fun insulated experiences by milking the cow once too many times.  Which may be an expression and if not it may be one now.  Anyway some Bonus Supermarket Stuff tonight.  Friday was Main Supermarket.  Now is BackUp Supermarket with some Fresh Things thrown in.  Yeah.  Sure.  Wait, Milking The Faucet.  That's the expression.  My bad!  I think Squatting should be called Faux Sit.  I feel very strongly about this!

Off brand adaptation of Joker called Wild Card   
   

    Well that's a title apparently.  Anyway some more paragraphs before 15-20 minutes of semi-strenuous chores.  Talkin' about goin' up ladders.  Talkin' about crouching in attic.  Talk about being very careful walking in attic because the wrong step and I Fall through the Floor/Ceiling.  We're talkin' hopefully no 'coons in the attic.  Here's the bargain-- I'll walk through some BIG spider webs as long as there's no live rodents mucking around.  That's a fair tradeoff.  Now where do I go with this proposal.  Who Do I See to make that compromise a reality?  Ugh.  The point is Hmm lunch is after that stuff wonder what lunch'll be all about.
    Great, just great.  In the future people will use Roller Blades for Fun as a Hobby, not just to get around quicker.  WHAT KINDA FUN IS ROLLERBLADES?  Does beg the question though When Were Roller Blades invented/became widespread.  And is it even slightly possible they were originally intended as a fun, fast way to get around?  I'ma look that up right quick!  UHH, roller blades were invented in 1080.  I did NOT see that coming.  I was imagining like 1910's, 1920's.  And they're already out of fashion for decades.  I might have been the exact generation for several years that was Slightly Into Roller Blades As A Tertiary Hobby.  Hmm, now I feel kinda special.  RollerBlade generation!  Do people do tricks with roller blades like with skateboards.  Or is it just like running on a that Level Escalator at the airport.  You run but also the wheels make you go fast!
    Or was it just 90% people like me who skinned knees over and over again.  I feel like 1/3 times I roller Bladed for 20 minutes I fell down and skinned my knee.  And a scab would form.  And I would pick at the scab.  In retrospect picking at the scab was the main hobby and fun part of it, roller blades were just a means to an end.  Oh well it made my knees Ever Stronger, its like calluses on your hand when you first start playing guitar.  Now my knees are stronger than ever and you gotta imagine that'll pay off somehow somewhere down the line.  I think going into the hobby with roller blades instead of skateboards is just a tacit admission I am so bad at Physical Activities I can't even LEARN skateboard over time.  I'm gonna be a beginner either way so why not start with the Better Thing?  NO CHANCE I'LL EVER MASTER IT ENOUGH TO BECOME A BEGINNER Best to just go with Baby Roller Blades.
    Wonderful.  Last section was 4 paragraphs.  This is the 4th paragraph of this section.  Chore Time is creeping up soon.  I think this all culminates in the determination this'll be the last paragraph of this section.  Most likely.  I had 1 Roller Blade Buddy.  Same guy who was my Rap buddy.  And wrestling Buddy!  The point is he was one of my best buddies for 2 or 3 years now that I think about it.  Also he lived in an apartment. I  believe my only buddy who lived in an apartment.  Actually he lived in two!  his parents were divorced!  I never visited any other apartment but with This Buddy I visited TWO apartments!  The point is huh wha maybe do one more paragraph for now.
    Why didn't his parents just pool their money and buy a house.  They could sleep in separate rooms if they want!  How have I thought of this wonderful solution yet it escaped my buddy's parents?  I I kinda recall having the thought when I was younger yeah my parents probably SHOULD have gotten divorced at some point seems like they messed up by not doing that.  And at this point they're just pot committed to staying together.  I dunno.  They're a good team!  That's my official position!  Anyway wow another section down.
   
 

More Entry   
   

    Physical Chores Done!  Dad showering now, me showering soon after that.  Then Lunch.  And at some point Finish Entry.  I totally went into the addict and adjusted 4 things from PERPENDICULAR to PARALLEL.  And I only almost fell off the ladder to the attic ONCE!  I thought it would be more Steady than it was that's On The Ladder that Ain't On Me.  Anyway now my room has 2 light bulbs at full capacity instead of just one.  Talk about a Rick Bright!  I originally guessed his name was, "Richard," but apparently it's, "Rick."  I don't trust anyone who chooses to go by Rick instead of Richard before the Senate. No matter how Bright they are!
    I also don't trust anyone in general overall.  You gotta earn it!  Anyway.  Six months ago when I changed Vents from Air Conditioning Ready to Heater Ready, I was definitely drunk, stumbling around dangerously, and now I'm like shouldn't I be drunk for this?  But that's all behind me now and I'm doing fine!  Also no Live Animals that I saw!  Some spiderwebs that's bound to happen and a lot of Concentrations of Dust but none of those were alive as far as I know.  The good news is I won't have Chores until 2-5 hours from now when I need to dinfect Fridge & Freezer stuff from Evening delivery!  And that's fun.  I got it all worked out.  Nice assembly line of putting out paper towels on My Side Of Kitchen Table, get a paper towl for drying and a disinfecting wipe for disinfecting, knock all those things out 6 or so at a time.  Then replenish the table with another 6 things and Boom Several Times Through This All Done!
    Anyway figure I'll finish up this entry after this paragraph and/or return a little bit later to add more.  Wait, not And.  Just Or.  Whew glad we settled that one.  Late Lunch'll be my favorite Smart Ones:Frozen Meals Meal.  Swedish Meatball with some sort of pasta!  I'm on board with this one I've gotten it half a dozen times already!  The bad news is my Mom was like well I wouldn't want the air conditioning on Now anyway.  And its not gonna get any warmer for another week at least.  So all of this was for Naught!!!  But such is life sometimes you do things which turn out to be for naught.  Anyway, just gonna wrap up entry.  See ya later!

-3:44 P.M.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

I've Got a Good Feeling About Next Year!   
   

    Was originally gonna say next MONTH but I on second thought I was like yeah not 100% sure I've got a good feeling about next month.  In terms of Crazysheet I Do because it'll be back to Black Background/White Text, but in terms of Life and The Outside World and All Thins Considered yeah lets set our sights for 2021.  I like Joe Biden's campaign right now because I have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what he would be like as president.  Would he be a relatively moderate in terms of Democrats?  Will he be solidly conservative even in terms of Overall American Political Definitions?  Will he throw some bones to the progressive wing time and time again?  NO FUCKIN CLUE but I DO know that hey maybe HE DIDN'T rape that lady.  I mean I know the stat that like over 90% of rape accusations are true, but also I was reading that article about 74 or whatever former staff members for Biden and not one of them is like yep that's probably true.  So He's Got That Going For Him!!!
    He may not have a lot of policy positions to support HOWEVER he MAY be innocent of rape.  And also SURE he may not have ANY enthusiastic supporters but this guy OOZES charisma!  Not just Charisma but man oh man is he inspiring!  He makes ME want to challenge people to feats of strength, which I believe is his campaign premise.  Anyway.  I think once Sanders puts all his weight behind Biden at/after presumed virtual convention, that'll give him a big bump in the polls.  Sorry, Terrorist Fist Gesture in the polls.  People are enthusiastic about Sanders!  Lets translate that, with his full encouragement, into a subdued enthusiasm for Mr. Joseph Biden At Least For Now He's Not So Bad 2020!! 
    The good news is I decided to google The Gate Full Movie and for some reason I can just watch the entire movie for Free on Youtube.  I've tried YoutubeSearching full horror movies and this never came up.  But you google it and BOOM there it is.  I liked the gate pretty scary for when you're a kid and presumably for toddlers and adults and also kinda just offbeat and interesting.  It's about some kids who accidentally open the Gate to Hell or something like that and spooky stuff happens!  Not kids who are friends.  2 Siblings and one of their best friends!  It's a nice little cast of characters I Really Buy that they oppened the gate to Demons and now they gotta deal with the consequences good or bad! Anyway, that reminds me.  Last night I had a dream I could do telekinesis and my main way of utilizing that insane super power was to just show it off to other people.  Like Hey, wait, come here.  Check this out.  And I would raise something off the floor a little bit or something.  And then they would be totally unimpressed.  I was like C'MON THAT'S AMAZING and they're like yeah whatever.
    I could only do it a little bit, not enough to actually make use of it in any practical way.  I would just focus and then it moves a few inches.  But still No One Else Can Do That!  Pretty impressive I think.  But no one else was on board.  Such is life.  I think that's probably a pretty good picture of my unconscious mind.  I have some very limited skill in something or another and I do realize its slight enough that there's no Good Use For It but I'm proud of it all the while no one else can give a shit.  Crazysheet 2020.  But also Beyond Crazysheet.  Anyway got some coffee going on pretty good stuff that's how I feel.
    Figure I'll take a break after this paragraph.  Didn't have breakfast today which means I can pretty much have lunch whenever I want to.  I normally try to wait 5 or so hours after breakfast for lunch.  It's called Strategy get on board.  I think the bad thing about gaining weight even though no one else is the wiser is I Still Know and it effects my self esteem being 10-20 pounds heavier than I'd like.  Stupid self esteem doesn't it know it means nothing.  All that matters is what other people think about you!  What you think about yourself, that's just stupid!  I dunno what this riff is about-- 1 interpretation is me being silly but another interpretation is me being Actually Right.  It's silly in that yeah its a joke  you shouldn't care what other people think care what you think.  But its also kind of Actually Right because ok you're getting enough judgment from other people thats fine but don't be so hard on yourself!  Maybe that makes sense Maybe It Doesn't Who Am I To Say! 

I've Got a Good But Trending Negative Feeling About Lunch   
   

    Well that sums that up.  Was thinkin something along the lines of Cup o Noodles + half a sandwich.  And at first thought Boy Oh Boy was I on board.  The closer I get to it though I start losing enthu-- wait a second now that I'm thinking about it more clearly I AM BACK ON BOARD WITH LUNCH.  Yeah that'll do the trick.  Anyway, tomorrow gonna change the Vents of the house so that they're tuned for air conditioning instead of heat.  They're turned This One Way so that the house can be heated during Winter.  Then we turn them This Other Way so that the house can be cooled during Summer.  Glad we settled that.
    Cool!  Hope there are no raccoons in the attic.  I hope tehre are no raccoons anywhere!  That's my take on raccoons Scary Disease Riddled Large Rodents.  Nocturnal, though, we should count our lucky starts on that one.  I'm mostly around during the day.  Is it possible During Quarantine that certain animals may Reclaim The Outside so to speak?  Squirrels and Pigeons might just be getting cocky and too big for their britches and when Pandemic is relaxed enough that we can go outside comfortably they're gonna be holding down all the corners and be like snooze ya loooze.  And presumably be selling drugs to heroin addicts.  Somewhere along the line I started thinking about this in terms of The Wire.
    I remember the time I did mushrooms in the park overnight there was some frog just frogging around and I was like oh my god I've never seen a frog before in my life!  I didn't know frogs were nocturnal.  Maybe they just wanted to be my Hallucinogen Friend.  Isn't Frogs a thing where you lick them and go on trips?  I shoulda done that then it would be a 2x Trip.  A trip trip.  Anyway I dunno how's this entry going so far.  Where are raccoons during the day time.  There's no caves or underground paradises are they sleeping high up in the trees?  Now that I think about it I've never seen any street animal Sleeping.  What's up with that?  Where are they hiding during their daytime/nighttime slumber lets figure this one out.  I dunno.  I'll be back in a bit.
   

If Elected I Will Close The Gate To Hell   
   

    Well whoever is saying that has got my vote!  Even seems like a pretty good bipartisan position, right?  So, jeez, on Coffee Cup #3 of 3.  I ain't gonna go ahead and make more coffee after 3 cups I'm no junkie.  I will only drink 3 cups of coffee within an hour and a half that's all.  Anyway what else to do with the rest of the day.  A lot of lying in bed but no Under The Blanket too hot for that!  Not even resting my head on a pillow too hot for even that!  It's fun because part of it is uncomfortable to be so hot but on the other hand This Weather Means SummerSoon which is unequivocally the best season for a child like me.  Schools out for summer!  Right?  Also it makes you sweat which is a productive thing to do for some reason.  Losing weight?  Even just seeing your body kick into gear is a thrill in and of itself.
    Well, great. I've gone many months without a haircut many times, but seeing my Dad without a haircut in over 2 months is throwing me for a loop.  Well, half a loop at least.  Maybe not the whole loop.  Gets all the way to the Top Of The Loop and then plummets down because of gravity.  What else is going on.  Figure take another break after this paragraph.  I figure lots of things many times and sometimes those figures turn out to be right and/or accurate!  Hmm speaking of SummerSoon is there going to be a SummerSlam this year?  That's the 2nd most serious WWF/WWE pay per view event.  Everyone knows Wrestlemania is the highlight of the year.  There's one every month, though!  And somewhere along the line I either picked up through inference or because it was explicitly said, SummerSlam is the 2nd most serious one.  Hah. Slam.
    Royal Rumble is another good one. Takes place in January and the premise is, the main Wrestling Battle is a ROYAL RUMBLE in which it starts with 4 guys and/or gals in the ring, and you have to throw someone out of the ring for them to be eliminated.  And then each time someone is eliminated A NEW PERSON comes into the ring--this happens 40 times-- and at the end the last one in the ring is the winner.  And presumably each time there's one guy who was one of the first people as one of the last people to Kick Drama Up Into Overdrive!  And I think its standard that the winner of this Royal Rumble get to face the current WWF champion at Wrestlemania.  At least that's how they did it when I was just a kid.
    Well I'm glad we covered that.  Figure I'll write another paragraph because Hey I Just Started Writing Another Paragraph.  Also if you have Wrestle Mania PLEASE see a physiatrist immediately.  And if you think, "Summer Slam," means something beyond just containing alliteration, PLEASE see that same psychiatrist maybe you could book this psychiatrist at a better rate based on all these visits.  Sure it means something.  SLAM is something that happens on occasion during wrestling.  Like one wrestler slams the other one into the ground.  And this is going on during Summer.  Summer Slam.  Also its fun its an expression like Ah this is a real SLAM I'm having a blast!  So it's a Wrestling Blast during Summer.  Right?  Presumably.  Alright Break Time.  A SLAMMIN' good time.  That borders on almost being possibly accurat-ive-ish?

Video Games is a Luxury I don't Have   
   

    Well maybe I do.  I still have a TV.  I still have my xBox 360.  I have probably a dozen games that would work wth it.  HOWEVER I.. uh... hmm.  Maybe I do take the plunge and Re-hook-up my TV after over a year without it.  I was promised a New TV in Winter of 2017 but right now it doesn't look promising.  Unfortunately Either Way I don't have any Wrestling Video Games which was the thought that inspired this entire Title/1st paragraph.  I'd like a Nice Baseball game, too.  One where I can do Fantasy Drafts and draft a team and then either play game by game-- I've got the time-- over an entire season and HOPEFULLY Post Season, or just simulate all the games and see how my team does!  And then if I make it to the playoffs SAVE PROGRESS and if I get eliminated GO BACK TO SAVED and then I win the series SAVE PROGRESS and if I lose the next series GO BACK and basically repeat this until it's game 7 of the world series and my Drafted Team is ready to make World History and then I finally Play That One Game.  I HAVE TO HAVE IMAGINARY STAKES IN MY IMAGINARY BASEBALL TEAM IN WHAT IN ACTUALITY IS AN IMAGINARY SCENARIO BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE THE GAME OR THE SYSTEM OR THE TV TO HOOK IT UP TO.
    Well that's great. I  don't wanna hook up my TV just for video games.  I've been doing so well without it I am well adjusted I am living my own life and I am using my computer on the surface the TV would be on.  So I got all that going for me is the point I'm not just gonna throw all that away!  Anyway what else is going on.  When you're playing Games where you have to Create A Character to play as, what's the percent of people who Create Themselves (either as accurately as possible OR as high-quality-in-attributes as possible) vs people who just see this as a blank canvas to make up someone new and have some fun with it.  I feel like I've done both over the years with various types of video games.
    Can't argue with a feeling.  We learnt that from Boston.  With their hit song, "DONT ARGUE WITH MY FEELINGS."  HEYu heard about More Than A Feeling is the same Chord Progression to Smells Like Teenage Spirti YEP WE ALL HEARD THAT ONE get off my back about it.  There's a finite amount of chord progressions that make sense.  You're gonna have some repeats!  Especially if you equate chord progressions that are the same but in different keys.  Then there's a real limited amount!  Anyway what else, what paragraph are we into.  15!  I like those odds.  I fnish this paragraph then write one more section of either 1 paragraph or 21 probably around 1-5 that'd be my guess!  
 

I Shall Continue To Drink Watered Down Orange Juice   
   

    Gotta make a stand somewhere, right?  Anyway last section of entry presumably.  Start up lunch in half an hour, presumably during this section but possibly After Its Done.  I shall continue to drink Orange juiced Water.  Hey been a while since I had a VITAMIN WATER.  Mostly just get those at convenience stores or bodegas and whatnot.  No longer going out and about?  No longer getting Vitamin Water!!!!  I LIKE A LOT OF THOSE ZERO FLAVORS.  Wait, no.  I like a lot of Vitamin Water:Zero Edition, flavors.  I don't like zero as in none flavors I LIKE A LOT OF ZERO FLAVORS!
    Hmm.  Well, what else is going on.  Id like to see some sort of graph charting people who drink soda and over time the slopes of Diet Soda vs. Sugar Soda.  I bet Diet Soda has made a lot of gains over Sugar Soda over time!  At this point maybe even over 50% soda drinkers is diet?  It's probably pretty close.  HEY I'MA LOOK IT UP TO SHARE INFO WITH MYSELF AND U GUYS.  Hmm these studies are complicated.  And most deal with Health Consequences of Diet vs Regular. Not a lot of MarketShare studies.  I think internet is really dropping the ball on this one.  I'm look some more Brb!  HEY I saw a thing that was like Diet Coke overtook Regular Coke at some poi.. then I tuned out because that's the info I was looking for Close Enough!
    Dye It Coke is the Rolling Stones sequel to Paint It Black.  If only, "Coke," was a color.  It could be, right?  I imagine a blackish color.... so not much of a sequel as it is a re-imagining.  Yeah Coke is black both because Coca Cola is black and also because isn't COKE some sort of Mine thing like coal?  YEAH it is related to Coal and coal is black right that's been my interpretation.  I have no idea how every story about Trying To Open The Economy Back Up! doesn't mention OVER A QUARTER OF PEOPLE WITH JOBS 3 MONTHS AGO NO LONGER HAVE THEM.  I'm no, "Economist," but you gotta figure That Will Effect The Economy, right?  Or is the economy just Stock Market and Companies Profit and Ultra Rich profit.  That's just what Economy means from now on.  The economies of people who don't benefit from those areas are just inconsequential, not newsworthy, not even worth our attention or consideration or least of all our concern.
    I SEE AN ECONOMY SCAM AND I WANT TO DYE IT COKE.  Remember when Coke bought the rights to Santa Claus?  I feel like when I was a kid there was a recurring commercial campaign every Christmas where Santa was drinking cokes or something.  I think the red that features  in each brand's color scheme might have had something to do with it.  The real depressing thing about running on closing the gates of hell is that There Was a Movie The Gate II which implies That There HellGate can re-open any time.  Hellgate.  Like Watergate.  Some sort of Scandal Involving Hell.  Let's get some humorists working on that one. Anyway.  Not sure if I had The Gate on VHS or just rented it a dozen times.  I think I only saw The Gate II once or twice, though.  IMPORTANT TOPICS.
    Cool!  Anyway 20th paragraph how about that.  I dunno take a break after this one wait a bit GET LUNCH GOIN come back and write another 1-5 paragraphs.  Essentially the exact same plan I laid out 5 paragraphs ago but this time with more paragraphs under my belt so its all Gravy From Here.  Hmm Fresh Stuff I'm getting from Fresh Direct tomorrow-- some sort of Turkey Meatlove boy oh boy some sort of RosemaryGarlic Sliced Potatoes I'm on board with that some sort of Brown Rice I CAN WORK THAT INTO STUFF!!  So basically things are lookin' up!  Only 2 chicken fingers to go but they were good, too.  Salmon was fine.  And the greatest news of all is I still don't have Coronavirus as far as I know!  Alright break time see ya in a bit!  Hah.  Meatlove.  I meant Meatloaf but Meatlove sounds like a... eh... what else is going on..

There Best Be a Summer Slam This Year That's All I Can Say   
   

    I can say a lot more.  For instance, the upcoming paragraphs!  Lunch right now-- Beef Cup o Noodles + 100 calories woth of Tostitos: Bite Sized Edition.  Easily could be just 1 paragraph here.  Whattado with the rest of the day.  More Watching Crap.  You can tell its Beef flavor because there were 2 pellets of Beefmeal.  Anyway crap and crap, got a dozen or so Tales From The Crypts that I haven't been re-watching but may be worth it.  Not the last season though.  The British Season.  Not on board with that!  Not out of any hatred or distaste with Britain in general, I just haeppened to not think that incarnation of Tales From The Crypt was that great!  I ain't pointing fingers!  Well, I dunno.  French Toast for tonight?  Turkey Sandwich?  The possibilities are... wel... most likely one of those two things.  I'll see ya later.

-3:12 P.M.

Friday, May 15^th, 2020

That's What I Like To Hear!   
   

    That sounds like something I'd like to hear.  Especially if you're saying it.  Man Oh Man.  GOOD NEWS Supermarket order has been put together, delivered, and all Frozen And Fridge Stuff has been disinfected andput away.  BAD NEWS nope no bad news that's the last thing that happened and its Good News!  How about this for bad news-- I cannot play guitar anymore.  I try sometimes and I just can't figure it out.  I don't know if that sounds like a joke or maybe self deprecating humor or maybe I'm just making it up and/or don't relaly care either way, but its 100% true and very unfortunate and it PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF.  I was listening to my 1 Recording of my Show I Did where I did Open Mics and of the 14 or 16 songs I'd say a solid 2 or 3 are worthwhile, half of the rest are well there's SOMETHING interesting here if only it was being performed better [more in tune and in more f an appropriate rhythm] and the rest are just well, clearly this boy needs help.
    I got Help its called They Closed Down The Place I performed.  No more failure there!  Problem Solved, Done & Done.  Sometimes when I talk to psychiatrists I don't go into all my problems, not because I'm embarrassed or I want to mislead then into thinking I'm doing better than I really am-- just because I'm lazy and wanna get this over with.  They ask questions like any voices?  Any paranoia?  Any Whatever Else?  And I always say yes to the first issue broached, and then by the second one I'm like, to myself, look this is gonna take forever if I'm 100% accurate and Say Yes to everything, I'm just gonna say, "Yeah I'm Doin Good There No Problems," for the rest of the appointment.
    Wonderful.  Riff where Improv Student practices by saying, "Yes And," to therapists.  That could be fun either as a riff or a, "SketchScene."  A Most real life psychiatrists wouldn't be that great an improv partners, though.  Instead of going Yes And Himself, he goes, well that troubles me greatly. ... I'm very concerned about that. ... I think you should walk with me to our intake facility...  Well great that was Nothing.  Chicken Finger I had last night was Great!  More for today's lunch and possibly dinner as well.  I got 10 Chicken Fingers which is the perfect amount of fingers for a human to get IT CHECKS OUT AND EVERYTHING.  I don't think Chickens have fingers at all.  Maybe some sort of claws.  "Talons."  That sounds right.  Sounds right are what I like to hear!
    

Alright Now Shut Up  
   

    Drinkin' some orange juice you know how that goes right.  Got some food in the oven that's the tops.  Got Some Legit Midshelf (as far as Supermarket Go) Turkey maybe for dinner toinght.  We're talkin 4 real sliced turkey not Processed Turkey NOT AS THICK AS I LIKE IT but that's what midshelf means.  I remember when my room had shelves installed.  Pretty much as soon as it became my room.  I moved into my older brothers Bigger room when he went to college, and immediately I was like ya know what this room could use some SHELVES.  So we put up 2 shelves above The TV Side Of The Room.  Which I soon employed to hold my Growing DVD collection and also sort random knick knacks.  Also one of my biggest claims to fame was that the person who installed the shelves, and who had done some painting for us too, painted the house of Rosie O Donnell and/or ...who was the other one... I forget.  Pretty confident that Rosie was one of them.
    Dunno how that information came to us.  It wasn't in his Bio when we were reading applications for Who Will Be Our HandiMan.. he must have dropped it at some point.  Why.  Why not.  CHECK and MATE.  Good idea for a RomCom about a high class Escort Agency that is so high class that you can ONLY pay by writing a check They Know You're Good For It and its WAY TOO MUCH cash for walking around. Also is it still considered Mating if there is no intention to follow this conception to completion?  I mean, first lets settle, if there's condomesque protection in place, is that mating?  And then incremental steps until is having sex with someone and then 9 months later A Birth Is Given but you don't really want the baby and just lose touch with it mating?  In modern history what's the youngest someone has been to go out on their own and get a job to survive. 
    I mean I'm sure its happening hundreds of time all over the globe at any given moment.  I wanna see that reality show.  And its just interviewing 4 year olds who have jobs.  I just wanna see toddlers acting like adults.  Not babies-- that's been done.  Not kids-- that's been done. TODDLERS.  We're talkin' 2-4 year olds I WANNA SEE THEM DO ADULT THINGS!!!  I feel like personally I probably peaked when I was 2-4 years old.  I was into reading and had a couple of friends and I was just chill ya know I was calm cool collected and centered.  And considering I could read Basic English sure why not I could handle a job.  Prove me wrong!   

WHY MUST THIS BE  
   

    I was thinking about it and I wonder if Moons Can Have Moons.  Satellites, so to speak.  I could look that up easily, even easier than just typing it here and moving on.  Would be easier to type it into google and find out.  But I'm not gonna do that because ALRIGHT FINE ILL CHECK IT OUT.  Anyway Internet shows there's been scientific analysis of, "Subsatellites," as they're called (COOL NAME!) and that in theory Sure Why Not but they have not come across any yet for Tidal Reasons or something.  Sub Satellites are what Blimpies' Corporate refers to each of their individual franchises.  Could have said Subway.  Blimpies is funnier.  Almost funny enough, even, that it almost borders on the realm of Actual Humor!  Hah, this is funny--  Blimpies isn't a word, Microsoft FrontPage says.  "Do You Mean To Say, "Blimpish?"  Well I didn't, but Now I definitely want to!
    Internet defines Blimpish as--

Someone, especially an old man, who is blimpish has old-fashioned military principles and is too proud of his country: a blimpish old colonel.

    Other definition---

adjective (sometimes initial capital letter)

  Well we're not gonna settle this any time soon.  Three first hits of Definition and three different definitions.  But for all of them I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ANY OF THEM MEAN.  Dunno what a Colonel Blimp is.  Don't know what a pompous reactionary would be.  Don't know what old fashioned military principles are, or why someone would be too proud of his country... Blimpish.  Ugh.  Anyway lunch is coming up in a minute.  2 Chicken Fingers, 1 .5 Left Over Frozen Pizza and 6 Or So Tater Tots.  I'll resume here when I commence there!  Oh.  I get it.  Like Colonel Klink.

Well Done Enough! 
   

    Dunno.  Lunch Going On then entry will be done. Have we ever established what side Colonel Sanders was on in the civil war?  Seems like he'd be a Confederate, right?  HOW IS THIS OKAY?  Hey if he wants to be From The South thats his perogative.  WWas there any widespread phenomena during the civil war where people living in the north were like nah I think the Confederates Got This One Right and fought with the south or vice versa?  There must have been some not totally insignificant amount of people who agreed with the Other Side From Where They Lived.  Hey ya wanna year something Cool?  We WON The Civil War!!!  I know its been a hundred and a half years but still ALIGHT CHALK A BIIIIG WIN UP FOR THE GOOD GUYS!
    Cool.  This'll probably be the last paragraph!  It does beg the question though is there a KFC/Blimpies CrossOver Narrative that we've all been too blind to see?  I remember when I first started Stuyvesant, maybe the first day the KFC in Penn Station was the first thing I got.  I was psyched the fuck out.  I CAN GET ANY FAST FOOD ANY TIME WTF IS THIS PENN STATION IS IT HEAVEN???  And then after a day of that I was like ah I see KFC not so great.  But then there was a few months that semester I would get McDonalds on my lunch break.  And my one friend/asshole-whose-companionship-i-tolaterated-because-i-had-no-other-choice would insist I get him stuff from McDonalds and to justify it with myself I made him pay me like 10 cents each time.  TRANSACTIONAL NATURE OF FRIENDSHIP I LEARNED IT THEN YOU LEARNT IT NOW!!  I'll see ya later.

-2:26 P.M.

Thursday, May 14, 2020

Another Day Down (Yesterday)   
   

    Today isn't down yet.  Its only just begun.  If anything, today is up. Anyway Wonderful News BACK INTO PODCASTS.  Whatta LifeSolution which is my PC way of saying Life H-word.  Hack brings up too much negativity for several reasons this will be the last time  I use it In Life.  Hey you guys like that game H-word y sack?  Cause I don't.  Anyway I was having some deja vu just now with that terrible riff, possibly because I've done it before and possibly just because de ja vu is a documented common phenomenon, and I also had some last night when cooking, and I realized that it must be universal that the main thought people have when having De Ja Vu is hmm wonder how long this is gonna last!  That's the most logical reaction.  I mean there's the base wtf does this mean am I a Future Teller or is time just cyclical and not a straight line and... but that goes away quickly because its uncomfortable and complicated so it quickly becomes hey this is kinda weird kinda fun WONDER HOW LONG IT LASTS!  And that thought is usually a precursor to it ending. Because its common enough that it wipes away the novelty of it.  Wonder how long this lasts.  Seems to be a theme of life these days.
    Yeah!  Another obvious thought-- hmm what is it about This Specifically that Time has decided to Hammer Down On.  Me making tortellini WHY THAT OF ALL THINGS.  I think one explanation I've read is that they're just like well it means you've done something similar in the past thats all it is.  I don't think so because its always sparked by Doing Something, but then there's half a dozen immediate thoughts and reactions In My Head THAT ARE PART OF IT.  I REMEMBER THINKING THA... NOW I REMEMBER THINKING THA... WTFTHISTOO!  Maybe my thoughts are just hilariously uniform and predictable.  I wouldn't put it past me, that could be the case.  Anyway Tortellini was shit way too much al fredo sauce and also the sauce tasted not so great.  I mean there's cheese in tortellini isn't that Creamy enough?  I feel very strongly about this.  So strongly that I'm gonna finish it for lunch today.  The good thing about putting it in the fridge is that the sauce evaporates/dries up/gets absorbed so I may still be eating the 1000 calories of sauce but it won't taste so bad.
    Also I don't mean to get you too excited by Chicken Fingers MAY be in the works for tonight.  Also I don't mean to get you excited so I will say nothing exciting.  Whew dodged that bullet.  Its really hard to dodge a bullet.  I mean you can dodge ahead of the bullet.  You see a bullet coming soon You Start Dodging.  But that's not really dodging the bullet that'd dodging in anticipation of the bullet.  If you're trying to dodge a bullet, I don't know what to tell you, bullets are pretty quick I think you're gonna have a tough time dodging a bullet.  So great we got a solid 3 paragraphs of about a D/D+/C-/C/C+ Quality and now I will take some sort of a break.  I'm very uncommittle in grades.  But I am committal in insisting that if Committal is a word then Uncommital must be or Incommital maybe but I'm being total neither are words by Microsoft Front Page I Dunno I'm Gonna Look Into That At Some Point.

Mike's Quarantine VII: An Old Hobby Emerges
   
    Podcasts I LIKE EM.  I may not be drinking or smoking cigarettes but I'm High On Andy Richter!  I'm about a 7.8 on the Richter Scale!  I wouldn't use the phrase Richter Scale in Andy Richter's presence.  Blah blah blah... Richter Scale. and then he goes IM TRYING MY BEST I KNOW I'M A LITTLE OVERWEIGHT.  Because it sounds like an order, a way to get his goat.  Richter-- Scale!  I KNOW he says I'M TRYING MY BEST.  Well, that's great, what else is going on.  How did primitive people who explained everything with religion and myth describe Earthquakes.  The Earth is Angry At Us Presumably For Some Moral Fault we... hmm, fault... that sounds about right, based on knowledge and terms thousands of years in the future, lets pick this topic back up then.
    That's my understanding of how conversations went thousands of years ago.  Hmm we could better address this in a thousand years why bother lets move on!  Anyway Why Bother Lets Move On.  Lets play a game of who can gain the most weight this year.  Might as well turn it into a positive thing, right?  The more you eat the more it shows you're just really competitive and Want To Win This Game.  And presumably there's some sort of prize, either a real valuable thing or just some sort of Symbolic Plastic Bowling Participation Trophy.  The point is I'm back to wearing my Puh Hamas.  How am I already up to VII in My Quarantine Saga.  And how long does it go.  If we're about halfway through, which seems like a good guess but could end up being way short, then, all things being equal, I get to around XIV Episodes.  But there's no law that forbids Episode II from being 2x as long as Episode III.  There's no law to this at all its the wild wild west when it comes to Quarantine Sagas.
    I vaguely remember in Little League Baseball/Bowling you had to pay for your own trophies.  I could be wrong but it feels right.  And everyone gets a trophy.  I remember on the odd occasion I would get a trophy thats actually for something, as minor as it would be, it was a great source of pride.  It would be the stupidest most inconsequential thing but at least its SOMETHING you're saying I'm good at SOMETHING SPECIFIC 10x better than just way to go you played in 75% of these games... 75% of the time.. you were on the bench 25% of the time which is really something because they HAVE TO LET YOU PLAY.  It could go the other way, too. I  feel like I might have gotten some award in Baseball where its like The Spirit Award! and its like you rallied your team and got everyone In The Zone! whereas I knew in real life I HAD NO FRIENDS ON THIS TEAM AND NEVER SPOKE TO ANYBODY!  AND ALSO I WAS TOTALLY TUNED OUT FROM THE GAME ANYWAY.
    I dunno, maybe they were like, HEY THAT KID WHOSE WEIRD AND SUCKS-- LETS WIN THIS ONE FOR HIM!  REALLY RUB OUR SUCCESS IN HIS USELESS WEIRD AND STUPID FACE.  I was decent at bowling.  I like the part where see you gotta bowl it in this direction, but you got some curve on it, so over the course of The Lane it starts turning in the other direction and BOOM KNOCK OVER AS MANY PINS AS POSSIBLE.  Cracked that code.  I liked Bowling Leagues because I don't think they ever taught you at bowling.  They just put you in teams of 4 and said go for it!  Anyway, I wasn't even fast in baseball.  You'd think a small guy, not a lot of meat on him, he could probably run pretty good.  But 1) I was so small my strides were so short so I was slower getting around and 2) I would get TIRED running to first base.  Partly because of Short Strides.  Halfway from Home to First (which I believe would be 45 feet) I would just give out and be like I.. CANT.. MAKE IT!!!!  Also no good at pacing myself.  It was sort of just like THIS IS GONNA GO ON FOREVER partly because I got so little practice running to First Base that it never became routine.  On the odd occasion I did make contact softly towards someone in the infield, running to first just seemed like an Inevitable Slow March Towards Failure.
    Sounds about right, I guess I did learn some life lessons from baseball it turns out.  Well, I got that going for me is the point.  Gonna take another break after this paragraph.  One thing I haven't figured out yet is to put in the Time Stamp after each section of entry.  I should commit one way or another but I haven't.  I do sometimes and mostly I don't!  Who gives a truck.  Supermarket Order comin' in tomorrow morning.  Whatta Slow March Towards Failure.  My favorite part is where I get Stuff That'll Last me Another Week.  I'm getting really good at being like alright I can eat this thing 2 times a week, I can eat this other thing 4 times a week, lets figure this one out c'mon guys.  So the point is Hey Another Break!

Tomorrow's Chores Are Today's Hang Ups
   
    Probably.  Anyway about halfway through May.  I like those odds!  June is practically in sight and then July is already the next month a fter that.  Reasonable to think at least I could start takin' walks in July or so.  They say I can already now!  By then I should be able to do it more comfortably.  That's great, just great.  Until then hmm outside wonder what thats all about.  Everytime I take out the trash I GOTTA DEAL WITH OH YEAH OUTSIDE PLZ DONT HURT ME.  Meanwhile if I was taking 5 walks a day OUTSIDE GOTTA DEAL WITH ME SHIT UP OR SHIT OUT I'M ROCKIN' THE OUTSIDE LIKE A FELON.  I saw they released Manafort from jail to put him under house arrest.  So, basically, he's like the rest of us.  How terrible. --My submission for, "Most Obvious Joke," of the this week.
    I DONT GET HOUSE ARREST HOUSE DIDNT DO ANYTHING BESIDES HOUSE AIN'T GOING NOWHERE EVEN IF IT IS GUILTY NO THIS IS A PERSON ARREST INSIDE A HOUSE.  My submission for, "Is this guy actually insane? Joke," of this week.  So, great, what else is going on.  Gotta Psychiatrist Phone appointment tomorrow.  That's great.  I only have to present myself as Totally Sane In Voice as opposed to In Voice and Appearance.  I could be flailing my arms around wildly and turning my heads 360 degrees like The Exorcist and my psychiatrist would be None The Wiser!  It's the perfect scam.  I'm not sure I'm 100% grasping the point of seeing a psychiatrist.  I'm not sure I'm 100% anything!  I'll be back in a bit presumably with lunch.

Oh Right More of the Same  
   

    Well, what else is going on.  I am having some lunch True Story.  It is Left Over Tortellini just as predicted as well as Half a Roll.  Since Quitting Drinking At Least, the middle half of the day is the worst.  Starts off with walking in a circle, great, I'm At It, Accomplishing Stuff, not so bad a day.  After dinner and just before dinner, great, relaxing a bit.  Between those times?  Whatta slog I'm not 100% on board with the middle of the day.  I Should just be drunk for 6 hours from 11-5 but this is not a just world so I have to make do with what I got.  Anyway this paragraph is over?  Cool! Whatta denouement.  I found the CD to RISK but I couldn't get it up and running.  Maybe I'll try again later.  Maybe a lot of tings.  That sums that up.

-2:17 P.M.

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

Today Is Tomorrow, Yesterday Was Next Week
   
    How about that.  New Day New Entry.  Same ol', same ol'.  I DON'T HAVE TIME TO MAKE A, "D," SOUND I GOT PLACES TO BE.  Presumably.  Possibly.  I got nowhere to be.  Makes Quarantining that much easier! Aww easssy.  Anyway started writing a new song yesterday.  And by started writing a new song I mean I, "Laid Down," one track of 60 seconds of terrible nonsense that is Nothing, and then, "Laid Down," another track of 60 seconds of even worse nonsense that has nothing to do with the first track of nonsense.  So yeah I'm about halfway there.  I think part of the reason I'm hesitant to get into recording music is because its better to do it with earphones on than hooking up 8 track to an amp, and I'm paranoid my parents will try to get my attention and the result of that will be SUDDENLY POUNDING ON MY DOOR MICHAEL MICHAEL HELLO?  Which in and of itself isn't so bad but the SHOCK of it happening UGH I CAN DO WITHOUT SUDDEN SHOCK.
    Also my upper-midshelf earphones I got 2 years ago, one side doesn't work so well.  It's the right side!  But I can reverse them and suddenly it's the left side!  So I know its the earphones and Not My Ears.  Anyway got some Tortellini Al Fredo for dinner tonight.  I don't make the rules but I also don't break the rules.  Basically I'm indifferent to the rules.  Gotta figure out what to pair Tortellini with.  Only enough for it to be 1/2 a meal.  Maybe some sort of Bread I've been hearing good things about Bread.  Another negative thing is there's a bunch of pre-programmed Guitar Sounds and there's a whole lot of ways to modify that sound, A LOT, which is great if you're a Music Guy Who Knows What You Want, but maddening if you're dumb and can't commit and I JUST DON'T KNOW THEY ALL SOUND GOOD TO ME.
    So I got that going for me.  Starting to get tired of Soup.  It was fun while it lasted but now I'm kinda like yeah I'm starting to see why Canned Soup doesn't have that great a reputation.  I mean it's great for Visual Art, it's a wonderful subject matter for paintings, but to eat?  I'd like to do better.  I think that was a Campbells Soup.  Was it part of the meaning of that piece of art that also for those in the know Campbell's soup Is The WORST.  I just googled that Warhol crap and I see now not only is it Campbells but it's just, "Tomato Soup."  WTF is that?  Just soup with tomato in it?  That's the grossest thing I ever head YOU MAKE ME WANT TO VOMIT MAYBE THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE GOING FOR I DON'T KNOW.
    Right?  Sure.  Hey I'm wearing clothes for the first time in maybe a week.  I had just been wearing my Puh hah mas every day but today I was like hmm feels like a day to Dress Up.  Let's Take Today Seriously relatively.  Feels good, not gonna lie.  I totally got the underwear, the socks, jeans, a nice SHIRT.  Well you know what clothes are like.  No ones reading this and being like hmm clothes?  Standard Clothes?  I dunno what that means Sounds Interesting Though!  The great thing about wearing clothes once a week is you have your pick of any clothes combination you want.  I can literally choose any shirt I want EVERY TIME II wear clothes!  I'm goin' with one of my favorite shirts, one of the only long sleeved shirt I have, nice BROWN shirt.  
    I think brown is the height of fashion.  I kinda do.  I dunno where I picked that up but I Like Me A Brown Shirt.  Such is life.  It could have just been Mom got me brown shirts in high school, continued wearing those shirts throughout adulthood, and they happened to be brown and I just got used to it.  Or maybe Brown Is Better.  At least when it comes to shirts, I dunno!  Over the years I've accumulated about 65-75% of my current wardrobe myself, but there's still a very decent amount of clothes that are just my clothes from high school.  Which My Mom bought.  I'm 14 wtf do I know about men's fashion.  Keep it simple, that's my fashion.  Keep. It.  Simple.
    Sure.  No one else was on board with Salmon.  What are people stupid It's Salmon Stupid Nothing Wrong With Salmon.  How hard do you hit the L in salmon.  Do you forgoe it completely?  Just say, "Sah-man," with no abandon?  Or do you go, "SALLLLL Man."  I think the consensus is you gotta make SOME effort to say it but as light as possible.  I feel very strongly about this.  Been thinking about ways to shake up my routine.  Maybe get up and go to bed later.  Maybe don't always do CircleWalking right when I wake up.  Maybe don't write entries every day or if I do at different times.  I feel its time to make some changes but I don't know what yet.  Cool.  I'll be back in a bit. 

You Make An Interesting Title
   
    Huh.  What paragraph is this?  7th?  Oh.  Right.  It Doesn't Matter.  What else is crap.  I don't get why probably around every other politician uses their power primarily to enrich themselves, or maybe supplementry to enrich themeslves.  Why not just go into a different sector where you're supposed to just be making money.  What kind of sociopath is like Yeah I'd like to make a lot of money but ALSO I'M A WONDERFUL PERSON WHO SHOULD BE EXALTED BUT ALSO OH MAN SO MANY SCAMS I CAN PULL AS AN ELECTED OFFICIAL!  Are they just so stupid they can't figure out another, more appropriate way to make money?  What's up with that.
    I'm starting to get better at Watching Porn.  Over 20 years I've gone through phases where I'm like yep I'm getting this right NAILING IT one might say and then there are ruts where ugh all of this is adequate I guess might as well get 'er done.  But now I'm back in WOW THIS IS FUN!!!!  I guess.  Is internet Pornography the most significant artform of the last 2 decades?  I feel like more thought has been put into "Keeping it Fresh," and, "Pushing the boundaries," and, "Lets see them naked bits can't go wrong with that!" than they put into other art forms.  I really get the sense every couple of years oh this website is pushing this genre for this time period, then over time it morphs into something else... Meanwhile TV and Film are the same thing since 2009 or so.
    I still remember where I was when I first started online pornography ON MY PHONE!  Before SmartPhone, I realized oh I can load up pornography images on my phone in a relatively quick fashion.  It was 2008 I remember it well the country was enthralled by some sort of wonderful recession and the election was creeping up quickly.  Meanwhile I discovered Brazzers: Both In General and On My Phone and I was like HEY NOW WE'RE TALKING!!!  And then of course 5 years later I finally get a smart phone and  OHHH BOYYYYY NOW WE'RE TALKING.  Anyway, I'm usually pretty susceptible to trying out whatever Porn Pornography Websites are pushing.  When In Rome! I say.  When In Rome stay inside thems the breaks they doin' even worse than us is my impression!
    Whatever.  I've probably gone through all this before.  It's a big part of my life!  I don't know yet if instantly available video pornography will be the WORST thing that to ever happen to mankind or the BEST thing.  I honestly can see it going either way.  If we all get to know each other intimately both in terms of our physical bodies, our apparent attitudes about sex in general/in this one documented instance, what we like and what other people like-- HOLY SHIT UTOPIA WE ALL LOVE EACH OTHER.  However, it could also be like WE WILL EXPLOIT YOUR SEXUALITY TO BREAK YOU AND FETISHIZE YOU DEEPER AND DEEPER UNTIL YOU ARE NO LONGER A REAL PERSON BUT MUST KEEP WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY.  I guess that's a decision for Pornographers to make.  Let's see what A.C. Newman has to say about this.

Things Happen Deal With It
   
    I will keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  Looks like we got some Frozen Bagels that's something new!  And YEP got some cream cheese thats been waiting in the wings for a long time now.  Then again I got other options don't you worry about me. I can still remember what I believe was the first pornographic video I downloaded from The Napster Of Videos: Morpehous?  Something like that.  Basically it was like 10 minutes of a Latina (The title's words, not mine!) giving a Regular Guy (My words, not the titles!) a blow job.  If it wasn't the actual legit 1st definitely in the first half dozen.  Also in retrospect, one difference from most porno now isthat he starts off soft and gets hard during this sexual act.  Hmm rings true that might be how it works a lot of the time.
    There are scenes in Oz: The HBO Show About Prison Life where you see dudes' junk often because they're being thrown in the hole cause you don't wear clothes for that.  And I always wondered if I was in that scene How Would I Prime My Peen.  Just absolutely nothin, that won't reflect well on me.  I can't be all-out hard, that would look ridiculous.  There has to be a better way!  Semi hard is the same problem as hard.  Is there a way to get the effect semi hard has on length and girth but with just the Hangin' out there of a fully non erect penis?  I think so!  It takes some training to get there but it can be done.
    The point is I have to start thinking about this now so that I'll be prepared when the opportunity does come.  Hold on, my Dick needs to get in character.  That was the topic of the last paragraph.  It's playing the part of solid 8 out of 10 Dick.  When the truth is it's only a 6 or 7 But Gotta Put Your Best Dick Forward!  I used to be a lot better at pacing myself while watching porn.  A 20 minute video?  Hell yeah I'll get through the entire 20 minutes I get this video completely!  Now?  30 seconds and OOPS I DID IT AGAIN.   Kazaa.  I think that was the name of a Post Napster file sharing w/ video file sharing application.  Sounds about right.  I was iI was thinking about it yesterday and oh yeah A FIFTH OF THE COUNTRY JUST LOST THEIR JOBS!!!!!!!!!!!  Wha, I mean, huh, WHAT?!?!  And nobody gives no fuck.  We bail out companies wall street big business and A SHIT SHIT SHIIIIT LOAD OF PEOPLE ARE OUT OF WORK.  So lets give them 1200 dollars and send them on their merry way.  HOW ARE WE NOT ADDRESSING THIS RESPONSIBLY?  OR EVEN JUST TALKING ABOUT IT.  THIS AIN'T GOOD JESUS CHRSIT.
    How the hell do you expect the economy to, "Go back to normal," when 26% of working Americans who just had jobs DON'T NO LONGER GOT NO INCOME COMING IN AND WHATNOT.  There is no going back to normal why can't anyone else see this obvious train wreck that's happening in either slow motion o fast motion whichever one is worse?  Unless you get some Green New Deal going where we hire them all up to Fix Global Warming I'VE SEEN PLANS IT CAN BE DONE!!!  So let's get crackin' on that??? Seems like a good way to go.  INFRASTRUCTURE.  Let's get some people workin' on infrastructure!  Sounds about right.
    Anyway gonna take another break after this paragraph.  Probably will Break until lunch and then resume entry thusly.  I just watched the scene where McNulty first fully commits to Faking Homeless Killer and I wanna be like ok nows time for me to check out!  Well done The Wire 4 Seasons + 2 Episodes THATLL DO IT FOR ME!  I guess.  Look I'm Wearing Clothes ITS TIME TO START TAKING ME SERIOUSLY.  Something along those lines.  Strongly considering, here and there, when things open up, FUCK IT DO SOME COMEDY OPEN MICS LETS GET THE BALL ROLLING.  Gotta have something to look forward to.  And that seems like a pretty appropriate and positive thing to plan for!  Hmm gotta get workin on some great Quarantine Material.  But it would be after the fact.  People will want to hear about quarantine presumably but also they want to move on from quarantine.  It's a delicate balence that only someone with my bona fides can tackle!  I'll be back in a bit!

Warp It Up
   
    How I'd like to.  Oh boy.  Lunch today is Smart Ones: The Frozen Meals: Lasagna Edition + French Bread Pizza: 1/2 Of One Edition.  Anything's better than Tomato Soup. Lunch today is Finished.  I got started and I couldn't stop.  Until there was none left.  Then I had no choice but to stop.  Anyway whatta do with the rest of the day.  There's late afternoon, a dinner I'm only Sorta On Board With, Nighttime of bullshit... anyway, another day down.  I mean there was this pretty small portion of Tortellini that's 375 cal but then I realized oh adding Alfredo sauce is gonna like double that so THAT'S TOO MUCH!  But such is life who am I to argue with alfredo sauce.  I was looking up Real Life Mafia on internet and man these guys are in prison a lot.  Each family has bosses that last like 2-5 years and inevitably just end up in prison.  Doesn't seem like such a great job in retrospect.  Anyway, that should, "Warp," it up. Warp it up real good.  See ya later.

-3:00 P.M. 

Tuesday, May 12, 2020

Let's Keep The Ball Rolling 
   
    Hmm, some sort of downhill surface should accomplish that.  Let's get R & D working on that one.  Research and Development.  Most likely learnt that term in a Batman movie, that'd be my first guess.  There's never been a Dark Spiderman.  We've seen some dark and light Other Superheroes but there's never been a real gritty Spiderman.  Let's get R & D working on that one as well?  Anyway Tuesday morning whassup.  Finished Oz, finished Good Seasons of The Wire.  Now we're down to... uh... read a book?  What the hell does that mean?  I thought books were only good for sporadically looking at the title either on the cover or on the Horizontal, and maybe sometimes for turning to a random page/part of page/word or phrase and being like WOW THAT RANDOM WORD I CAN'T BELIEVE It and then you put the book back down.  Sure I know how to read.  Titles and random words or maybe phrases.  Prove me wrong!
    II mean if you really wanna ingratiate yourself into the book's world you read the first word of every line.  Like each individual page, you just read the first word on the left side of the page, one after another, and see what kind of faux-sentence that forms.  I think at this point its been either 6 or 7 days without alcohol.  Whatta scam.  I could totally be doing everything I've been doing but buzzed!  Oh well such is life for some reason I value my parent's respect and trust more than I do alcohol.  Or at least I did that one moment I poured out all my alcohol.  Since then its been back and forth on what I value more but oh well pot committed now to no alcohol Thems The Breaks!
    What else.  There was one episode of Tales From The Crypt with Bruno Kirby: The Actor I Probably Would Have Explicitly Liked If He Had Lived More, which I had seen in the background a few times over the last year but finally really registered what the episode was all about this morning.  It was fine!  Directed by Michael J Fox!  No wonder the camera was so shaky!  Gottem.  Sure Directors personally handle the camera.  That's why they're called Cameraman.  Wait, no they're called directors.  Because they DIRECT the camera man on what to do.  Still though Michael J Fox could have been like I HAVE A VISION FOR THIS PRODUCTION AND THAT VISION IS VERY SHAKY BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I KNOW NOW GET TO IT!
    Sorry, Cameraperson.  I've never seen a real movie and/or TV set but in Fiction portraying those situations I don't think I've ever seen a Camerawoman.  I feel like maybe if its News or some sort of Documentary Production I could imagine a camerawoman.  But, like, a blockbuster film or something?  Wtf where's the camera gender equality.  Also why do we need camerapeople isn't that something robots could do better at this point?  I mean the director has got it all storyboarded, right?  Cameraperson is just there to fulfill the scene's destiny.  I dunno anything what else is going on and crap.
    Anyway, great, what is this the fourth paragraph?!  Nope 5th already!  I don't believe it.  Maybe take some sort of break after this.  I've spent a solid 15, 20 minutes writing here I think I've earned some sort of Break or somethin'.  Was looking at the New York Guide To Hopefully Relaxing Quarantining and I get the impression there's a decent chance we can let up in my area (NYC Meets Long Island) in 5-7 weeks.  I feel like that would be pretty good.  No guarantees it'll turn out that way though, whatta jip!  So the point is I'm gonna take a break maybe 2 or 3 sentences from now.  And I plan for those sentences to be just continuations of this one line of thought.  If you doubted me, you have been proven to be wildly incorrect, Goodbye!

With Or Without Booze 
   
    Hahaha I took one word and replaced it with a different word.  Makes sense to me!  The point is One Day I'd like to get into U2 because I know half a dozen of their most populous songs and I'm on board with them!  Wait what band do you want to get into?  U2.  You sunk my battleship.  See if I was drunk NO WAY I'd come up with that gem.  You need to be firing on all cylinders to reach this level of whit.  Also lets spell it whit.  No one's gonna stop us!  Whit is already a wod like the phrae to whit.  Meaing like, "A Small amount."  So I have wit to whit.  O I have a whit wit.  Wittle Baby with his whittle wit.  That's an appropriate response to reading this.
    Obviously not there yet, but I am getting the sense I MIGHT be getting into MusicMakin mode.  Still of the mindset I need to write this every day, which prevents me from doing Music during that time/inspiration, but there's a universe where I can do both each day.  Or a universe I let this go for a few days.  Or a universe where we all play Monopoly together or something every day, I dunno, there's lots of universes!  I read an easy tip a few months ago or so on Monopoly that in retrospect is so obvious but I never really realized it.  Just Buy Everything You Land On.  No being like Yeah I don't want Orange wanna save up for Blue if I get there.  No, you land on something, ok, that's what you got, pay up.  Otherwise wtf are you waiting for GET CRACKIN you're never gonna form a Monopoly by being picky!
    Also as far as I know each segment of properties isn't that much of a better deal than the other ones.  Yeah some are more valuable, but you pay more.  Others net you less profit but they were cheaper to buy.  Just fuckin' get what you get a chance to get c'mon.  Also what's the consensus on playing with Trading?  I feel like maybe 50% of the time I played it we were like ok as the game is getting into the Middle Stages you can start trading properties.  Seems like its kind of cheating but isn't that the best message you could send with the board game Monopoly to reflect Actual Monopolies?  It's All Cheatin' THE PARKER BROTHERS WARNED US.
    Just started up the oven.  Just walked back up stairs.  Just started this paragraph.  Just ahh here we are.  I think its odd that in the boardgame Risk they can't even fathom of using a Navy to attack another territory.  Or even just using WaterShips to transport Land Troops.  I feel like that has been done throughout history for thousands of years and even across continents for hundreds of years.  Risk, though?  HOW CAN EUROPE ATTACK SOUTH AMERICA IT MAKES NO SENSE THAT COULD NEVER HAPPEN.  The point is Risk has some major plot holes however I did have a CD of Computer Risk where you can play the computer in addition to multiple Home Players and Sure If I Had That CD In Front Of Me I'd play some Risk!  They even have multiple maps.  There's Classic, there's World Map (which is still a map of the world but like 5x more divided and complicated and whatnot) then they got North America, Europe... all that jazz.
    Someone should design an obstacle-course type combination of All The Major Board Games.  Macro is risk, and then you can settle certain battles with Strategy or something, others with Battleship... lets get Twister involved somehow, some Operation would be nice...  So there's an idea there but I'm not gonna think of the specifics I CAN'T THINK SO WELL I DON'T HAVE ALCOHOL TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'M DOIN' GOOD.  Oh man one day I'll have alcohol again.  I figure when this is over I'll be like ok guys I'm just gonna go buy 2 beers THAT'S IT get in get out Ok Great See Ya In A Bit!  Anyway.  CUNY was in the news yesterday because some colleges are makin' some teacher layoffs.  Starting with adjuncts.  My Dad works for Cuny!  And is an adjunct!  Luckily we can survive without that source of income but yep.  Also he's got a job for the Summer I believe and not sure about the fall.  One good thing is he's like the most senior adjunct you can me.  Adjunct means not full time, in case you don't know.  But he's been adjunct at one of these colleges for literally 40 years.  WOW!  Anyway, I dunno, take another break right now!  Be back in a bit!

Imagine That 
   
    Started watching Big Momma's House II and made it 9 minutes before I Cannot Do This.  Also why is the franchise called Big Momma's House.  I know the setting of the Original was in a house-- Big Momma's House-- but the house itself wasn't really central to the plot.  Big Momma was-- more accurately, Martin Lawrence masquerading as The Real Big Momma-- but the house hardly figures into the equation at all!  Not to mention the sequels which don't involve the house at all.  There's no Big Momma's House VI: Back II Where It All Began and they return to the original Big Momma's House to finally settle things once and for all.  Well, not yet at least.  Not to my knowledge.
    I was lookin if there were any good 2020 movies I can pay to watch Online and So far Not Lookin' So Great!  I mean there's plenty that if they were available for free I'd be like sure hook me up with that.  But to pay 15 dollars for?  I'm not ready to make that sort of monetary commitment.  Anyway Good News we got a huge pack of Milano Cookies Bad News ran out of Coffee Filters Good News Mom directed me to a new pack of Coffee Filters Bad News I had already started my lunch in the oven so what good is coffee to me for the next hour or so?  Good News is I'll have coffee ready as soon as I want it!  Right?  Sure.  I saw a number about how Covid-19 is more prominent in racial minorities than white people.  I think in NYC it said something like 7% of fatalities are white?  I mean accounting for socio-economic conditions, healthcaire prioritizing, demographics most likely to work or live in areas exposed to pandemic... I mean I knew it would all add up to a lot but damn not that much.  No wonder white people don't give a shit. 
    I dunno.  I need to do some more research into this, 7% can't be right, right?  This other CHART I JUST LOOKED AT shows white Asian American about the same, Latino somewhat higher, and African American double everything else.  SO basically I need someone smart to put together all the facts and present something informational and instructive to me on this subject STAT.  Which is a Hospital expression meaning how many Doubles has this Nurse hit over the last 42 games of the 2020 Season.  Something along those lines.  Let's get someone crackin' on that is the point.  Anyway, Lunch'll be ready in 15, 20 minutes.  See ya then! 

Entry Almost Over, Rest Of Day May Be Good 
   
    So I got that going for me potentially.  2 more paragraphs to go.  Maybe find that RISK CD.  You'll never know if you don't go.  You'll never shine if you don't glow.  Something along those lines I've been led to believe.  Anyway main positive way CoronaVirus has impacted my life is I no longer have to Go To Supermarkets Physically and Transfer 20 bottles of soda from rack to cart from cart to purveyor belt from belt to cart from cart to car from car to house from house to table from table to fridge/cabinet.  I have to do ohter things that are 20x the amount of work each week but none of that!
    Hey we made to the last paragraph again.  Decent chance, maybe a solid 20-25%, that I make some progress in either Martin Short Book or George Carlin.  Maybe even start a new book!  Ya know what would be good is to read a LEARNING book not a fiction or an memoir.  A book about Facts and/or teachings I can see myself getting into that.  In an ideal world.  We are not in an ideal world.  In fact we are in one of the worst worlds possible, all things considered.  But the point is the entry is done so see you in Hell!  See ya later.

-2:43 P.M.
   
   
   

Monday, May 11, 2020

Danger!  Watch Yourself! 
   
    Was about to say Check and Check! but looking up the lyrics to Danger: The Rap Song From Roughly 2000-2001, there is no watch yourself.  I could have sworn it went Danger!  Watch Yourself!  Show Me What You're Working With  Also Get On The Floor At Some Point Sooner or Later. Turns out that's only about 60% accurate.  Is it in bad taste to all rap songs sound the same to me.  I mean its clearly its bad taste but is the insinuation of racism analogogies obvious or just an unintended consequence?  I think its okay.  I think its safe to say, fan or not, all [whatever genre of music] sounds the same to me.  Because it is kinda true.  Even genres you like.  That's what Music Is.  Something That Sounds Similar Enough That Feels Familiar But Unique Enough To Keep You Interested And Engaged.
    That's what racial/gender/sexuality/etc. demographics are, too.  People who are similar enough in genetics and/or appearance and/or anything else and whatnot to keep you comfortable but different enough in personality and/or genetics to keep you interested!  Now I get extroverts!  They're Into The Subtle Differences Between People.  Now I get introverts!  We're ALL RACISTS, HOMOPHOBES, AND MISOGYNISTS!  Sounds about right.  What if its a lady introvert.  What's the alternate word for misogyny.  Patrosogny?  NOw I'm interested there's gotta be a word for that.  Misandrist.  How is that not a phrase that we hear 24 hours a day from alt right/incel/misogynist communities?  Too complicated a word for them.  Uh oh now that I put it out there it'll spread and spread until THEY get the word and now we're all fucked! 
    Hmm, Could you be a misogynist and a misandrist at the same time and its basically you just hate people.  I dunno, the difference is, you gotta hate Men for being Men and Women for Being Women.  I dunno something along those lines.  Yes I am over simplifying the definition of words.  I'm also making up words and ascribing them my own definitions.  Also it's about 40% pure nonsense.  Lots of reasons not to take this seriously at all.  If you just hate All Genders you're a MisanX.  Maybe some Non Gender Binary people are MisanX.  Maybe they're not!  It's a person by person case when it comes to MisonXs!  I don't get it.

I Dislike People On a Person By Person Basis
   
    I was gonna joke I hate people... but I don't hate people!  I know its a joke but I still don't wanna put that message out there.  I Love people!  But my fist instinct is to dislike most of them.  People are great to love and get along with but c'mon have you interacted with any of these chumps?  Many of them are mildly annoying until you get to know them!!!  Anyway lunch in a bit looks like some Turkey/Misc left over other processed meat sandwich + some chicken dumpling soup.  Haven't had this soup before!  I've had half a dozen varieties of Progresso Chicken Noodle BUT NOT THIS ONE!!!  I can't wait to find out if its roughly as good as every other one! 
    Cool.  I'm starting to reach a boiling point of Not Being Able To Watch ANY Tales From The Crypt anymore.  At this point its a joke.  I just can't.  I started watching Heathers and it seems like a great movie to watch one day but it's Too Much for me.  Everyone agrees teenagers are inherently scary and this is just that increased Exponentially.  On the other hand one day I'll enjoy watching it Just Not Today!  I also have watched maybe 2 Simpsons in the last 1 or 2 weeks.  I'm sure I'll enjoy watching it one day but for now TOO SCARY!!!  WHY ARE THEY YELLOW THAT'S THE COLOR OF DISEASE I'M TRYING TO AVOID DISEASE.  Hmm.  Avoid.  Covid.  You go ahead and figure that one out.
    What else is going on.  Starting to think about re-watching The Sopranos.  Because I don't value my life or my time in the least.  If I really wanted to waste my time productively I'd rewatch Breaking Bad and then First-Time watch Better Call Saul.  I don't think I've ever re-watchd Breaking Bad.  I watched it The One Time (after the fact) and that was it!  You'd think The Walking Dead would be a natural thing to bingewatch based on the last month or 2 of me detailing my entertainment choices.  YOU'D THINK WRONG.  My Mom used to watch it all the time and I'd see parts of it all the time and YAWN SNOOZEFEST.  Oh, I even watched the Spin off Fear The... and I watched the whole first season and It Was Okay At The Time but in retrospect YAWNNNN SNOOOZEFEESSSSST. 
    Jeez.  About a year ago I started binge watching The Twilight Zones: The Originals and I got to about halfway through season 3 (like 40-60 episodes in overall) and I got to one episode I didn't like and I was like FUCKKKKK THIS.  That's all it took!  I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH THESE SNOOZEFESTS YOU DON'T GET THREE STRIKES YOU DON'T GET TWO YOU MESS UP ONCE I'M DUNZO WITH YA.  Anyway.  Walking Dead.  Pshhh.  I've seen these dead more like The STUMBLING Dead!  Walking dead, nah, I don't see em making uniform strides confidently down the side walk tipping their hat going How do you do? no they're stumbling around either randomly or towards some juicy brains.  NOT WALKING ONE STRIKE You're Done!
    Wow.  I think I've figured out how to Act by watching all these TV and Movies.  Oh so you just say these words.  I get it.  You're putting Everything You Know About This Character INTO EVERY LINE.  No subtlety.  Just THIS LINE MUST REFLECT THE MOST BASELINE GENERIC INTERPRETATION OF THIS CHARACTER.  WTF U MEAN DIFFERENT KINDS OF ACTING?  Well, that's certainly one kind, I'm comfortable saying that.  Maybe its even easier.  You're director just goes hey say the line this way.  And you just go yup you're the boss! and then you say it that way.  Sure the job isn't easy because I could see repeating that activity over and over and over again might drive you insane.  That's how it would make me feel at least, that's my interpretation.
    Anyway, I dunno.  Got Night Of The Living Dead: The Original That Started It All in the background.  I even remember in my life seeing it as a kid and being really scared.  In retrospect I dunno.  The bloody head at the top of the stairs, that got me good the first time I saw it when I was, whatever, 8?  10?  Now its all so tame.  A good movie nonetheless, but horror wise, there's not many jump-scares.  Especially after you've seen it 2 dozen times!  There's hardly ANYTHING new that freaks me out what a crappy movie!  Hmm, riff about how Trump would respond to a Zombie out break ala Night of The Living Dead proportions.  Well there's 100 different ways you can go with that and maybe one day I'll decide to do it but for now eh.
     I think the other main alternative to Acting By Throwing Every Thing We Are To Know About This Character Into Every Line is to just always act by Throwing Every Thing About Yourself: The Actor: The Character You've Developed For Yourself As A Real Person into every line.  Either you're in character or you are character!  Choose wisely probably!  Or maybe both.  That seems to be the sweet spot!  Anyway, started Tots in the oven.  To pair with Smart Ones: The Meal I Previously Discovered Is Like Chinese Food But A Small Portion.  Probably take a break until Lunch Time Eating.  Seems like a thing to do.  I'm supposed to be taking 2 Ritalin a day as prescribed, and I have found without alcohol it helps to have something in the middle of the day, but for the most part I would guess Klonopin is better.  I wanna relax not perk up!  Although if I perk up in The Right Way I can see it working in my favor!  The point is I'm not completely bereft of options.  See ya in a bit.

I'm On Board With Everybody!

    Unless explicitly stated OR you could reasonably assume I'm Not On Board With Them.  I've explicitly stated I'm not on board with Trump, for example.  Mike Pence?  Probably explicitly stated that, too.  Let's see, ugh, Kellyanne Conway.  Haven't explicitly stated whether or not I'm on board with her.  You could reasonably I assume I'm NOT though, based in current information and parameters that you have available to you.  Also, I've stated I'm not on board with certain behaviors or beliefs, so if someone practices those behaviors or exemplifies those beliefs, then, again, I'm assuming you will use your reasoning powers to determine if I'm on board with them. 
    Also, generic person with no information?  I'm On Board With Them.  That's the baseline, I'm trying to do the right thing here.  Scene of Trump Hiring KellyAnne Conway-- WHAT'S YOUR NAME.  Kelly Anne Conway.  IS THERE ANY OTHER WAY?  LAUGHS AND LAUGHS!  Anyway started back up here before lunch was ready, but I gotta go prepare it in 10, 15 minutes.  Gotta put Smart Ones: The Frozen Meal in microwave for my guess is between 4-8 minutes.  Gotta do lots of things!  Well, just that.  And take Tots out of the oven.  So Just 2 things more or less.  Scene of 2020 Presidential Winner THE ROCK hiring KellyAnne Conway-- WHAT'S YOUR NAME.  Kelly A-- IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!!!!!  Jeez can we elect The Rock just for the laughs alone?
    13th paragraph over all.  I like those odds!  They're not odds in and of themselves (itself, more accurately) but they are pertinent information if you're calculating odds on a host of possible things.  Right?  Sure.  Anything I feel for the first time since Not Drinking in a week or so that I'm losing myself a bit in the EntryWriting.  I like that because it's good to do things you like without relying on being in an altered state to do it.  That's one of the main lessons I think I was supposed to absorb as a young person.  And I did but I mostly chose to ignore it.  And I'm sure I will again!  But for this week I'm doin' okay great I dunno.  Wow.  Still eating a lot of Night Bread.  Dunno what to make of that. 

Soda Is a Treat In and Of Itself.
   
    In and of itself is the caption contest winner to a drawing of Oroboros.  Sure caption contests are a thing.  Anyway having a nice little lunch right now.  With soda which I've been led to believe By Titles That I've Written Recently is a treat in and of itself.  Anyway got FreshDirect delivery last night with some SALMON FILLETs and CHICKEN FINGERS and I had one of the SALMON FILLETs last night and IT WAS PRETTY GOOD I was gonna heat it up BUT I KEPT TAKING SMALL BITES COLD and I EVENTUALLY FINISHED IT PRETTY QUICKLY while WAITING FOR MY SOUP TO HEAT UP.  I don't like tuna finish but this salmon had a slightly tuna-ish taste and I liked it for some reason.  You figure that one out!
    Cool.  OH I KNOW I was conflating Danger: The song with :Shake Ya Ass: The song.  Both by Mystikal both around the same time period and both very similar songs all in all.  Except for that Shake Ya Ass plays prominently in the Film Adaptation About A Boy which I came to really like as a film after the fact when I was no longer a boy but a MAN.  I think I liked the soundtrack before the film.  I had Badly Drawn Boy's soundtrack to the film (Artist Name/Film Name is a coincidence I'm pretty sure) in college and there's some nice songs in that sucker!  I have a vague memory of seeing About a Boy as a 13 or so year old Alone in the theater for some reason.  I dunno.  Maybe a Bar Mitzvah type scenario.  Before this movie I wa a boy, now seeing a movie By My Lonesome I Am A Man.
    Probably.  Too bad Hugh Grant is dead or they'd be able to make a sequel.  Kinda seems like Hugh Grant might be dead, right?  Haven't heard from him in a dog's age. 16th paragraph which means it can stop at any moment.  I am in control, though. That's nice to know.  Hah.  About A Boy.  Like HUGH GRANT'S CHARACTER MIGHT ACTUALLY BE THE BOY LOL I GET IT I'M ON THE UP AND UP.  Also LOL ABOUT A BOY LIKE ITS NOT JUST THE BOY IS THE SUBJECT BUT ALSO THIS BOY IN QUESTION IS ABOUT A BOY MORE OR LESS LOLLLLL.  The point is I know what acting is all about, I know what titling is all about, I know what seeing movies as a substitute for Bar Mitvahing is all about...
    Anyway just remembered Danger is a real possibility this morning.  Was relaxing into Inconvenience Mindset of Pandemic and then I was like oh right not only will this crap last a while Me and My Fam can still get sick and/or die.  Whatta scam!  But on the other hand maybe we're just a couple months away from opening back up I can do a couple months I just did a couple months!  So yeah I got that going for me.  Whatta do when this entry is over.  Count the hours until dinner which is presumably more Salmon gotta finish it within 3 days that's the rules.  So, yeah, great, anyway.  I'll see ya later.

-2:51 P.M.     
   

Sunday, May 10, 2020

It's That Time of Day Again!
   
    Sounds accurate no matter what.  I like those odds!  Unless its a time of day that its never been before.  Like the 25th hour.  Wait, no.  That HAS happened before, at least Once.  Lets go with the 26th hour, then.  That's a time of day that it hasn't been yet to be done again.  Well, Sunday, right?  Closing in on a week with no alcohol.  I've found Cooking or doing Chores somehow gets me into the same head space as being drunk.  I'm DRUNK ON POWER SPAGHETTI POWER.  I dunno, in a way being drunk just helps me get from One Part Of The day to the Next Part.  So does cooking.  Before I was living in the afternoon.  Now I'm cooking dinner for tonight.  Then its eating and it is tonight.  What even WAS afternoon I can't remember oh man my mind is running wild.
    Another thing is that I might just get off on doing adult things.  Drinking makes ya a man.  So does cooking Fried Eggs.  Maybe cooking supposedly gets me the approval of my parental units.  And deep down I just wanna soak in either outside-approval or self-approval.  There's a lot of interesting questions being raised here and I'd like to answer them at some point When's Good For You?
    Got some coffee going.  Nurse is in the house.  She's wearing a mask and everything.  Anyone make a The Mask: The Jim Carrey Vehicle pun with Quarantine Masks?  Its out there if anyone has the nuggets to take it on.  I think until Billy Madison its possible The Mask was the first movie that I just kinda thought in the back of my mind well this film speaks to me.  This is the film that I'm Into.  It may not be my favorite film, but its the closest to Who I Am.  Then Billy Madison usurped that and I dunno at some point something else.  Maybe SPIDERMAN I: THE BEGINNINGS OF TOBEY MAGUIRE.  I'm not saying I necessarily totally related to Stanley Ipkiss and/or Billy Madison-- I think that's probably part of it, but I just mean the films as a whole were in tune with what I was all about.
    So I got that going on?  I dunno.  What film would I say fits that bill today?  Impossible, I think.  My soul has branched off and been sequestered into many tiny pieces that picking one film to encapsulate all of it is impossible.  But, if I had to, SPIDER MAN III: TOBEY MAGUIRE SPIDERMAN CLIMAXES.  That's a joke.  Please Believe Me!  III can't be climax.  There's no portmanteau.  Rennaisiceio.  Denounment THERE WE GO now whats the right spelling.  Denouement.  "the final part of a play, movie, or narrative in which the strands of the plot are drawn together and matters are explained or resolved."  Also I think there's just a plain CONCLUSION after that.  And then based on Super Hero Movies and TV Shows being our main cultural literatural input the last 10 years, we can now safely say that the Conclusion is not the end but that Teasers During The Credits are the ACTUAL last piece of our Dramatic Journey.
    That's what we've learned in the last 50 years.  Conclusions are well and fine but there must be TEASERS or MOCK TEASERS to Future Incarnations Of This Story.  That's part of the heroes journey.  You think its over but then it turns out there might be more and then THE END.  The bullshit is I have White Castle Hamburgers but no chicken nuggets???  What level of hell is this?  I mean I guess 2 Burgs and some tots isn't that crazy, that's even how they recommend it in Meal Form, but what kind of moron is getting Fast Food-- all out, not thinking about diet-- and isn't getting Burger, Fries, AND CHICKEN CONFECTION?  I mean, really.  Not just in this frozen incarnation, that's what I've done with fast food MY ENTIRE LIFE. 
    I can't be alone on this.  2 things isn't enough.  I mean, I even remember getting hamburgers, CHICKEN burgers, fries, MORE CHICKEN in the form of NUGGETS/FRIES/TENDERS... Variety is the spice of life is the point!  I'm just lucky I didn't know Fish Sandwiches were pretty good back then, too!  If I knew that I would be getting Burgers Chicken Burgers Fish Burgers Fries Chicken Nuggets plus MORE BURGERS WITH CHEESE BECAUSE ITS SPECIAL "SPICY" CHEESE.  I like the sizes of Chicken Rings in White Castle.  Small is 3 or 4.  Medium is 6.  Large is literally at least 20.  Hmm forgot to put, "RINGS," when listening Kinds of Chicken.  Well I'm happy I figured that out before putting this paragraph to bed.  Anyway time to take a break!  Be back in a bit!

-11:33 A.M.

Time Has Passed
   
    Hmm that's an interesting point.  Not ENOUGH time has passed, though.  That's life these days.  Yeah its been a fair amount of time but How Much More Time exactly will there be?  Pretty much the main question, right?  Anyway probably the best news in a week or so is that I finished this Re-watching of Oz: The Prison Drama Located In Colorado I Want To Say?  And I got 3 Joe Bob Briggs queued up.  As well as I dunno I'll figure some entertainment out.  Martin Short was on SNL last night (If time even is a thing anymore) which reminded me I'm still halfway through Martin Short: The Autobiography That I was Enjoying But For Some Reason Lost Track Of. 
    I think he lost me when I was reading the Recommendations on the back cover and for some reason I found all the quotes suspect.  Quotes from David Letterman, Amy Poehler, Larry David, and Jon Stewart.  ANd they were all like YOU GOTTA READ THIS BOOK!  Just that.  Very generic phrases.  Larry David-- "What a wonderful book!"  Jon Stewart-- "You really have to read this book!"  "Entertaining and delightful..." -- David Letterman.  LOOK I READ A BUNCH OF THIS BOOK AND ITS OKAY BUT IT'S JUST ABOUT THIS GUYS LIFE.  WITH SOME HUMOR THROWN IN NOTHING GROUNDBREAKING.  I mean part of me feels like the quotes about it are meant to be satirical but they fall in that uncanny valley between genuineness and light-hearted-ribbing-esque-sarcasm that I just don't understand. 
    Also no way these people actually read the book.  WTF u take me for some sort of rube?  Larry David is not going to read an autobiography of Martin Short that's just a recollection of Martin Short's yes, interesting life, but nothing groundbreaking or anything.  And presumably if you're friends with Martin Short you already have a good idea about him and what hes all about.  That's why its so suspect.  Generic High Praise from people who I Wanna Say Definitely never read this book.  Anyway I just noticed my bookmark for this book (about 40% into the book) is a ripped off note from my pocket notepad and its got random titles and crap on it!  Turns out this book is valuable I was saving titles in it!  Story of my life.  No it isn't.  As far as I know Martin Short never even really breaks through to an American audience.  He may he may not my memory is not to be trusted so all I know is what I've read.  Was watching Clifford a few weeks ago and its scary how much I subtextually buy into the idea that Martin Short is himself a child actor playing Clifford.  Be back in a bit!

-12:09 P.M.
   

I'm Not Great at Reading
   
    That sums that up.  I think to be a good writer you have to be not that great a reader.  Dunno what that means or if its accurate at all but  it sounds smart.  Cool.  5/10.  That sounds like something.  Oh, I got it-- 5/10/20.  /=x2.  5x2=10x2=20.  I'm not great at math but it sounds smart.  Wait no it doesn't.  Cool.  I'm not 100% on board with how quickly they're making commercials that are sort of winking and exploiting the fact that they're being shot remotely per person.  Or that they involve families of actors that I guess live together in real life and now they're a REAL FAMILY COMMERCIAL.  It just seems like they jumped really quickly to monetize our current situation and I'm not on board with it at all.
    Awww, that family of actors is doing a commercial because we're all trapped in our houses.  THAT'S NOT THE 2020 I SIGNED UP FOR!  I think the part that pisses me off is the insinuation that We Need Commercials To Comfort Us.  Like anyone was freaking out about their health or their job or anything and they see a commercial that Dove: The Soap Company Cares and they're like OH WELL I GUESS EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT NOW.  It has the opposite effect on me. I thought everything was going to be alright but now that I see Dove: The Soap Company is exploiting this crisis to boost their sales and brand exposure I FEEL WORSE.   The point is Great what else is going on.  12th paragraph.  Figure Lunch is in about an hour or so.  How many paragraphs = an hour?  I wish I had the answers to that but it's not so clear cut.

-12:57 P.M. 

An Entry Divided Against Itself Cannot Stand
   
    I see how it is.  Last section and/or paragraph of entry.  Started watching Heathers: The Movie and it's real spooky!  I dunno whatta do with the rest of the day.  Well, I know whatta do with it.  I dunno how I'm gonna like it.  It'll involve the same stuff as the last week or so without alcohol which is more or less tolerable but nothing exciting.  Starting to do some more CicleWalking now that alcohol is out of the equation.  Increasing from 1 hour a day to, well, more than 1 hour a day.  Could be an hour 20 minutes, could be 2 hours!  This is fascinating stuff that even if you don't want to read I'll want to read in Future Times to be like oh right that's an accurate account of Those Several Days.  Which all in all is all I really need from life.  I'll see ya later.

-1:40 P.M.
   
   

Saturday, May 9, 2020

Ya'll Ain't Learnin' Shit!
   
    How could that not be the inner monologue of 90% of teachers 90% of the time.  My Dad teaches well and it seems like he gets a lot of feedback from his students and a lot of time they're doing well/are engaged, but I still feel like if I was in his place my constant thought is CMON WTF YALL ARE SLACKIN'.   Also to be fair I'm in this mindset because of Season IV of The Wire.  Probably that's more than 50% of it.  In fact, definitely!  MY Dad's a wonderful teacher I'm sure a lot of his students are learning shit.
    It just seems like education is futile.  I graduated K-12 and have a college diploma and For What?  I know how to read and do basic arithmetic.  I have a reasonable amount of knowledge of American and World history.  That's about it.  My take on the Everything I Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten, honestly, would probably be Everything I Need To Know I Learned In Fourth Grade.  I feel like that's where I topped out.  Fractions and stuff, maybe some post-pre-algebra/pre-geometry... getting into Reading with basic analyzing skills and Just Starting to think about Current Events and history somewhat critically... everything after that is a blur.
    Or, more accurately, much of it is Just That but taken to further levels, but most of those levels have been abandoned for one reason or another.  I got valuable headspace devoted to remembering 100 movies and/or tv shows that I re-watch over and over For The Last 20 Years.  Prove me wrong!  Spanish is all well and good but it won't prepare me for Real Life as much as OZ: The HBO Prison Soap Opera will!  I think that's a running theme of good Drama Binge-able shows that people like.  It shines a light on different 0kinds of lives that you don't have and prepares you with the basic ammunition to survive in such lives that you will never live.
    Like WATCHMEN.  I am and will never be a WATCHMAN but at least now I have rudimentary understanding of how WATCHMEN live so on the small chance I do become a WATCHMAN then time well spent!  Anyway I dunno.  Looks like MAYBE a new computer is in the works because of my Battery Being Dead.  Which I'm 100% on board with mostly because my computer screen is stained to shit from coffee and cigarette smoke and all sorts of things, to the point my eyes have adjusted to it, but if I were looking a at a So Fresh So Clean monitor I'd be like HOLY SHIT this is the equivalent to putting glasses on after having then off and... having needed... glasses... you get the point!  Although I do think that influences my writing.  I'm focusing on different parts of the background instead of the text, something along those lines.  I wouldn't put it past me!
    I guess I peaked at learned Social Relation Stuff in 7th-8th grade.  And then slowly started a decline over the 10 years after this.  Then went up a bit the last year or two at college/doing Open Mics.  Then went back down.  And now am right back around 4th grade.  Yeah 4th grade feels right.  A junior in Elementary School, middle school is ALMOST in reach but not yet.  I've always felt that people who do K-6 Elementary School were weird as fuck.  Not the kids themselves, but that process.  I was just like sixth grade wtf everyone knows that's middle school territory what's wrong with these people.
    Cool!  Been enjoying some orange juice.  When it was 50% sugar orange juice I did 1:1 with water.  Now that it's 100% sugar orange juice (wait, that doesn't sound right... 100% sugar would just be a cup of sugar...), I do 3:1 OJ to water.  To be fair my last year of college I learned a fair amount.  Registered a lot from my Environmental Science class which helps me understand those key issues.  May not have retained all of it but it was worthwhile.  Had the African American Lit class, similar thing where I retained about 60% of what I learned there.  How to analyze AA Lit and think about things like that critically.  The point is apparently I retain 60% of Whatever The Last Thing I Was Doing.
    Unless it's 4th grade.  I'm still up and up on 90-95% of things 4th Graders Know.  That'd be my estimate.  Figure I'll take some sort of break after this paragraph.  You know, your standard break.  In terms of I Was Doing This, then I Will Not Be Doing This For A Period Of Time, and then presumably I Will Start Doing This Again After The Fact.  Anyway, I even vaguely remember having the thought, middle school?  6-8?  A whole school for just 3 grades?  seems like a waste.  And then the supplementary thought WTF if 6th is elementary school, a WHOLE SCHOOL FOR 2 GRADES?  I JUST DON'T SEE IT.  Anyway gonna take a break now.  I'll be back at some time in the future but Not The Past well maybe The Past for you Almost Definitely But For Me Compared To When I'm Writing This Pretty Much Definitely The Future.

So Much Coffee
   
    Gotta consume some mildly mood/mind enhancing drug.  Why.  I dunno it just seems like the thing to do.  RECYCLE where N=REC and E=Nothing NYC!!!!  Is there a slogan/logo there to persuade NYCers to recycle on City Busses or something?  Seems pretty straightforward.  Where did I get, "Recycle," from.  Was lookin' around my room and saw a plastic bag that said Recycle.  That's some trickery right there.  Plastic Bags can't be recycled or something, right?  I dunno, maybe they can.  We didn't cover that until 6th grade!!!  Hmm seems like that should have been covered in Environmental Science.  Maybe Teacher just assumed we knew that basic fact and Assumed Incorrectly.  Hmm... I think I'm thinking of those plastic things 6 or 12 packs of cans come in and they formed an island which caught fis.... wait no that's en episode of The Simpsons.  Which I probably saw mostly in 4th grade so I guess it does make sense in the end.
    Anyway.  Lunch is in about an hour and a half.  We're talkin 2 hot dogs!  and... that's probably it.  Maybe some Tater Tots I Dunno we'll see how this situation plays out in real time.  The point is I would be just lying in bed on my phone watching OZ but my phone needs some charging and I can't have it plugged in while lying down Wire is too short!  Yes The Wire is too short I'd like to have seen a 6th season.   Anyway should be plugged in enough in about 15-20 minutes which should be enough to definitely finish this paragraph pretty much there already and another 2 or 3 are in the works MAYBE MORE IF I FEEL INSPIRED.
    Inspiration, what's that.  I just know Sit Down And Type and if you really wanna be inspired probably take some mildly mood/mind enhancing drug.  That often does the trick!  Anyway.  Do Prisons have Fresh Air breaks.  I feel like in most movies of Penitentiary Life they have outdoor time.  Not in Oz, though!  They never see the light of day.  Don't even have windows for the most part!  Whatta scam.  If Prisons didn't have Fresh Air Breaks when would they ever play football games between the prisoners and the guards.  You can't play Football in Gymnasiums.  Maybe You can.  I kinda wish we had now that I tihnk about it, in Middle School lets say.  I did play football every other day in middle school.  During Lunch/Yard time.  Had to choose between eat lunch & chill or Football % ...wait thats not an ampersand.  In retrospect not sure why I would play football unless it was Football & Chill, I can't recall a situation where anyone would ever pass the ball to me.  Just chill with the other wide receivers who no one would pass to, that's the only thing I can think of.  So, yeah, I had that going on in middle school. 
   

Google-- Where Do The Supermarket Hot Dogs I Have Rank Against Other Supermarket Hot Dogs??
   
    THIS IS IMPORTANT RESEARCH.  It doesn't even matter, I'm stuck with them either way.  They could be the best, they could be the worst, I'm stuck with 'em and that's the way it is.  But still it'd be nice to know how my expectations should be AND it'd be interesting to see whether I like them or not how that relates to how OTHER people feel about hot dogs.  Am I on the same wavelength as the general public re:Hot Dogs?  Or am I an outlier.  That's really what I'm looking into at the end of the day.  So that's a paragraph I guess.
    Cool!  Figure that'll be lunch in roughly 30-45 minutes.  Two Hot Dogs.  With an appropriate amount of Bread for Hot Dogs.  What more do I have to learn today.  Re-find ot what happens in Television Programs from the 2000's.  That's about it I guess.  Take some more walks and presumably re-listen to myself from the 2010's.  Go to sleep at some point.  Watch SNL the next day.  One of the only TV shows that I still watch on my computer.  That, and CROSSFIRE.  Wait no that's not a thing at all anymore.  Instead of crucifying Jesus they should have given him the Potential Witch treatment and thrown him off a cliff into a lake.  Not sure what that would accomplish but I think it's a more amusing way of killing someone for purported spiritual malfeasance.  Maybe crucifying is funny and I'm just been brainwashed to not, "Get It."  Or maybe just throwing someone off a cliff into a lake is inherently funnier, I dunno, I don't have all the answers!
    Anyway.  Figure I'll take a break after this paragraph, eat lunch about half an hour after that, write 2 more paragraphs or so, and call it a day.  I figure lots of things, this being the most recent one.  At some point I'm gonna miss a Day and break my Every Day streak.  Closing in on 2 months, though, so that's a big milestone.  What else.  Why do I write such meaningless unentertaining garbage.  Garbage makes me feel good.  It's certainly better than Nothing.  Just ask Land Fills.  They'd be Nothing without garbage, suddenly they serve a purpose, now who's nothing?  Some other... place.... thing... the point is Land Fills serve a vital societal need.  Alright I'll be back in a bit.

I Am Not a Good Person
   
    I had made myself an abundance of coffee and my Mom finished it and when I came down stairs she was like Thanks For The Coffee! and I was like, in my head, I AIN'T MAKE SHIT FOR YOU.  It's fine that she had it, whatever.  But it was For Me and I was ticked off that she made me confront my own insensitivity  in that I didn't feel good for being generous but instead felt bad for being selfish.  What else is going on.  I'm confident that in some universe this paragraph makes sense.  Gotta be a universe for everything, right?  It's weird that people 50 years ago didn't know the Earth looked like that blue marble with the white clouds all over the place.  That picture is from like the 1970's.  Before then people didn't really know what the world looked like!
    So that's relevant.  Right, right... Universe, Earth.  All part of the same Multi-verse.  Jeez.  Anyway finish up entry now.  For some reason it's really starting to hit me that 2020 is the year and its a weird year.  5/7/20, 5/8/20, and so on... keeps feelin' weird.  First few months didn't even notice its weirdness but now its crept up on me and I can't shake it off!  The point is Sure NYC Should Recycle But there's no Logo that could demonstrate it with 2 words or phrases, one over the other, and certain letters in different colors so that you can make some sort of pun say suitable for the side of a bus.  That's how I feel!  I'll see you guys later.

-3:14 P.M. 

Friday, May 8, 2020

Lots of Good Things Happening
   
    No it isn't.  Good news is Just Went through Helping Essential Worker through supermarket order and then when it came disinfected half the stuff.  I think if we had only called Slaves Essential Workers that would have been a good compromise and everyone would have been on board with it.  If you really appreciated them, every now and then if they do a great job you can tip them by Whipping Them Only 90% the amount as your regular nightly whippin's.  The point is its not a stretch to say Republicans are treating so called Essential Workers as if their lives are worth about 3/5ths as much as everyone else's.  'Merica 2020!  Got lunch going on in about 15 minutes.  We're talking One Frenched Bread Pizza.  Why did I start the entry with that I was goin' to try to go for dumb nonsense.  Just turns out that Racism/unvalued human life is some of the dumbest nonsense out there.
    The point is I have soda but its nowhere near cold enough.  It was in fridge for roughly 1 hour.  C'mon don't play games with me this soda is room temperature AT BEST.  Well, probably at worst. There was no process in which I was exposing my soda to heat levels above room temperature.  I'm not THAT stupid.  Point is I'm almost done with OZ!  I liked the final season of Oz because they just killed off 90% of the main characters.  Everyone Must Go!  Halfway through Season IIII of The Wire:  The Season They Abandoned The Rules Of Latin Numerals.  Also we say Roman Numberals but wouldn't Latin fit the bill as well?  That's my guess.  Anyway when you want to put together a tip for an online order you should specify you want to give a XV% tip.  SOME PEOPLE SPEAK ROMAN NUMERALS THIS IS ALL THEY KNOW.
    Malcolm X's son being Malcolm XI.. pretty sure I've said that before.  Sounds like a Chinese guy.  Probably, that'd be my guess.  Since we're doing offensive language humor-- idea for a book-- Spic and Span:  A Man and His Language.  Or wingspan or something.  I don't have all the details worked out!!! I think butterflies are probably Latinx.  I don't know what that means but its just my first impression I dunno.  Figure I'll take a break after 5 paragraphs.  Gonna start/finish lunch pretty quickly after this paragraph.  I've got it all figured out is the point, get off my back about it.  Anyway putting together order with Fresh Direct for Sunday, which is basically Regular Supermarket + Extra Prepared Meals and Stuff.  Gettin' some REAK CHICKEN FINGERS.  Gettin a few SALMON FILLETS.  Would have gone with steak and more chicken and meatballs or meatloaf or something but parents were like we're done here and I was like I ain't gonna push my luck.
    Looks like over 50% chance we're doin spaghetti for dinner I Love It!  Its pasta + Spaghetti Sauce.  YBut you know that.  I know you're on the up and up you know all about pasta and the standard preperations of normal usual pasta.  Also I'm gonna finish this paragraph before Lunch!  I'm gonna do lots of things!  Well, at least This One Thing!  Here's an idea for Republicans-- pit recently unemployed workers against currently working, "Essential," workers whose lives and health are being undervalued.  I'm full of great ideas at the detriment to American society!
    I've got 2 tabs open with Ernie Hudson.  1) Tales from the Crypt episode.  2) Oz episode.  3) told you there were only 2 don't be a dummy.  The good news is this French Breaded Pizza has all the fixins.  We're talking bread, tomato sauce, cheese... pepperoni meatball presumably some other crap.  Whatta do with my post-lunch period of Nothing.  I've been eating a lot of Night Bread lately.  I finish dinner on track for decent calories consumed day.  Then I eat a bunch of bread!  I figure its worth while because it gets me 1 step closer to falling asleep because all that bread makes me sleepy.  And I need to fall asleep so I can wake up the next day!  Be back in a bit!
   

I've Got The Jack Of Queens and The Heart Of Spades
   
    Uh oh my deck of cards has been corrupted.  Anyway just found a pencil with a better point behind my Computer Surface Desktype thing.  Wonderful!  Got some coffee going on.  Another day without drinking.  Presumably a lot of eating bread, though.  You find comfort where you can.  Presumably.  Didn't eat breakfast today.  Had to work on Supermarket Delivery immediately after WakeUpTime.  Ugh this section of the entry sucks.  I'm gonna take a break after this paragraph then resume when I'm REALLY ready.  Not just when I Have Something To Consume For A While Ready.  I'll be back in a bit!

Have I Been Gone Long Enough Yet
   
    It may not sound like a big deal, but its really effected my life detrimentally how every time I move my computer to a different surface I get scared it'll get unplugged. Don't let your batteries die is the story, I guess.  So I either have to stick with Computer Facing One Direction or take a chance to delicately slowly but surely move it around half a dozen times a day.  No good answers!  Only bad questions.  And medium half-baked nothings.  Plus side-- FOR REAL CHICKEN FINGERS.  Minus side-- OF ALL THE THINGS IT HAD TO BE CHICKEN FINGERS?? WHEN I COULD HAVE GOTTEN NUGGETS INSTEAD PRESUMABLY?!! WHY CRUEL FATE!!  WHY MUST YOU TEMPT MY ANGER TO MANIFEST WITH THESE GAMES!
    I dunno, I figure Cruel Fate knows what its doin'.  Eighth paragraph more or less.  I dunno.  Figure I can take some sort of Ritalin and/or Klonopin to make Middle of Day somethin worthwhile.  I have a pocket in my Pajama Top that I've unintentionally been using instinctively as a Nail Pocket.  I realize that's gross and every time If eel a nail I'm lik yuch this nail ain't even fresh and I throw it out.  But still there's the other end of it where I'm biting a nail and am like well I'm done I guess, don't wanna waste it, might as well save it for later just in case I need an emergency nail. 
    Something along those lines.  Sometimes the nails that aren't fresh are the best.  They've really crystallized and hardened to a consistency I can, "Dig."  I like how there are full movies on Youtube you can buy that nobody in their right mind would never do but under these circumstances we may have to settle and spend 4 dollars to Rent Return of the Living Dead II: The 2nd Best out of III one.  I like it because the hero is just some kid.  Not a teenager or adult type person.  Just some little kid.  I feel like that was a Joe Bob Briggs movie.  Saw it there originally.  While I either had Return of the Living Dead I on VHS or rented it literally 2 dozen times.  Maybe I started off renting it half a dozen times, then I got it.  Lets split the difference there!
    Cool.  In the Non-ROTLD movies, the regular sequels to Night of The Living Dead were Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead.  Guess they stoppe, "Living," presumably.  Now they're back to being just Dead.  Presumably still animated some way, I seen em up and about!  I think I read it was because the rights to Night of the Living Dead were split between 2 people or organizations-- One of them owned Living Dead rights, and the other one owned TIMEOFTHEDAY of the DEAD rights.  How do you explain Land of the Dead, the 4th in the legit George Romero franchise?  That's not a time but a place.  Setting, still.  It's a Setting of the Dead. 
    Cool.  11th paragraph!  Now we're talking.  What were we doing the last few paragraphs.  I was typing and in my mind I was imagining myself talking what I was typing.  You were there too observing in the background but not specifically you.  Just sort of a general You.  That settles that.I  I've noticed certain tropes in Tales From The Crypt manifest in like half a dozen episodes.  One-- Siamese Twins are central to the part of at least Three full episodes, and show up in at least another 3, as well as 1 where regular identical twins are essential to the plot.  Two-- Sideshow (Circus/carnival type things) Stories-- I can think of AT LEAST 4 where that's the main setting of the episode.  Three-- I dunno 2 different supertropes aren't enough for you?  You need an attitude adjustment.  Oh heres one off the top of my head-- someone doing a radio show-- I can think of 2 and sort of a 3rd but I can't put my finger on it!  Fascinating.  Break time! 

SOMETHING TO DO AGAIN IN TWO DAYS?  WHAT IS THIS HELL?
   
    The rare Bolding by Unbolding.  I think it works better than you might think.  I don't think better than you can think better.  Well, 4 more paragraphs or so.  What else do I got going on.  Hey!  Here's a standard CrapThing-- Original flavored stuff usually means the opposite.  ORIGINAL potato chips?  ORIGINAL GUM?  YOU MEAN STANDARD.  ORIGINAL MEANS THE OPPOSITE AHHHHH GET OUT OF MY FACE ABOUT IT. No its original because they started off with this flavor and then decided to branch off into these other varieties.  Maybe it works with potato chips but not gum.  There's nothing about original flavored gum that's like well this is the baseline of How Gum tastes.  My assumption is that the baseline for gum taste is Rubber.
    What if you're an original gangster.  That mean you're a run of the mill standard gangster or you're OffTheChartsOffTheWallDifferentKindOfCrazy kind of gangster?  Probably somewhere between.  It means you hard, you a tough guy a throwback.  AH there's the slightly alternate meaning.  You're a throwback to what the recipe called for back in the day.  Your gangstering is reminiscent of gangsters in a previous era when gangsterring was taken a lot more seriously than thes N. G.... wait thats no good.  Uh oh.  I better end this paragraph right now!
    Fascinating.  Two paragraphs to go hypothetically.  Ugh Carcetti just won Mayor again.  It's a nightmare running on a loop every 18 months I watch it!  TONY GRAY BEING ROBBED OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!! WHAT IS THIS HELL.  Anyway, I dunno.  Another day without alcohol.  Gets pretty boring.  There will come a time, though, where I can take 5 walks a day.  That will kill some boredom presumably.  Anyway the good news is I wonder what I'm gonna do with the rest of the day.  Spend another 20 minutes wipin' down some more stuff.  Another half hour half-cooking Spgagetti presumably.  Going to sleep with or without bread. 
    Jeez.  Maybe some CircleWalking.  Thinking about listening to myself.  If not me, who? If not why, when?  If not then, how?  MyselfMusic, I mean.  I realized I was being ambiguous.  I can eat bread before dinner.  That's a thing to do.  It only lasts 20 seconds but boy oh boy does it last that 20 seconds.  Anyway no law that says paragraphs have to be the length of paragraphs.  If there is I've overlooked it in all my constitutional analysis studies.  So I'll see ya later!

-2:35 P.M. 
     

Thursday, May 7, 2020

Blam More Entry
   
    I have an insatiable desire to write bullshit at least once a day!  Anyway Grocery Supplies running low but good news They Will Be Replenished tomorrow morning!  If all things go according to plan.  I knew there was a plan to Life these days.  It's setting up Grovery Deliveries and having them fulfilled appropriately.  It's not much but its all I've got to hold on to.  Anyway, I dunno.  I'm starting to realize all I have to do to watch re-watch something which I've last watched in the last 6 years is just Watch It Without Being On My Phone.  It's a whole new movie and all I have to do is Nothing Else.  Works wonders Life Hack. Life Hack, 4th rate Slasher Movie.  Presumably about a Hacker stalking/haunting a penitentiary where all inmates have Been SENTENCED TO DEATH!!! And someone is going around killing them before their execution date for some reason.  How could it be another prisoner you'd think he'd be behind bars himself.  Oh I Wouldn't Jump To Conclusions So Quickly!!!  Something tells me there's gonna be a few left turns in this story! 
    This writes itself.  I can write it in one month.  I CAN DO IT!!!  Will I?  Eh I'll think about it.  Probably not.  I'll think about thinking about it.  That's accurate that's all I'm capable of at this early stage.  Is there a supernatural element to the story? Too Soon To Tell!!!  Cool what else is going on.  Even If I Knew I Wouldn't Tell You.  No Spoilers On This C'mon.  Jeez.  Running very low on Food Supplies pretty much am pot committed to a lunch and a dinner for tonight.  One meal is 2 Hot Pockets.  Another meal is just a cup o noodles perhaps + half a sandwich.  I could make macaroni but get off my back about it I'm not in the mood for macaroni.  Anyone wanna write Life Hack with me?  Life Hack for doing things-- work in teams! 
    Hmm interesting set up for the plot.  Instead of just random people getting hacked, its prisoners and/or guards forming a Team.  Or Maybe The Hackers are more than one and THEY'RE THE TEAM.  Nah I don't like that.  But potential victims forming a team seems like a pretty standard trope for such a movie.  Jeeeeez lets move on.  Maybe its like Prisoners vs Guards and they're each like IT MUST BE ONE OF YOU GUYS WHOSE DOING THE KILLING and the other team is like YEAH YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DEFLECT YOUR OWN GUILT!  I promise I will stop talking about Life Hack for the rest of this entry and maybe take Real Life Notes if II come up with something better.  Wait, it needs a whole other element to make Life Hack the pun that it needs to me.  Hmm.  Give that some real thought.
    4th paragraph!  Woke up halfway between normal time and late time from yesterday.  Let's split all sorts of differences.  Maybe lunch is Regular Soup + Half Sandwich.  Maybe lots of things!  I guess at this point I'm pot committed to a prison as a setting.  I guess at this point I'm pot committed to PLEASE LETS MOVE ON.  Anyway.  Gettin' some sliced mushrooms from Delivery tomorrow.  That can go on pretty much everything!  Sandwich, soup, frozen meal, pasta, ANYTHING.  I can't think of a thing it WON'T go with.  I guess Another, Bigger Mushroom.  But I don't have that so thats no problem.  I've even stuffed jalepeno peppers into Hot Pockets I can do that no problem.  Maybe Chicken Nuggets.  Sliced Mushroom doesn't really do much for that.
    Probably not, at least.  Hey take a break after this paragraph.  Feels right to me.  I wish I had chicken Nuggets RIGHT NOW.  I'd have like 2 white castle burgers, 5 nuggets, and 8 tots.  It feels right and I will presumably be able to do it tomorrow BUT I WANT IT NOW.  Also chicken nuggets really needs to expand their demographic from Children to Every One Else.  We all know chicken nuggets are delicious but no adult is getting and/or eating chicken nuggets.  Except for me.  And maybe you.  Maybe you're a child, I dunno.  Either way I recommend chicken nuggets go for it!  Anyway I'm gonna take a break now.  See ya in a bit

You're Welcome In Advance For This Section
   
    Its kind of crappy that we're never gonna really know when its really safe to start re-integrating Outside World into our lives, or know the real tolls of Death/Infected/ProjectionsOfthoseNumbers and Whatnot.  Gotta go by instinct on who or what to trust at this point.  My instinct is hmm this is a tough one we're gonna have to figure this one out.  Anyway we've passed 1 Superbowl of Dead People which is an interesting counter programming to the Superbowl.  I'd be on board with such a TV Event.  About 20x people who died on 9/11?  Due to terrorism attacks?  I bet a bunch of people died on 9/11 to unrelated causes, that'd be my guess.
    My instinct is just that we're gonna be told its okay to start loosening restrictions when it isn't, and then we basically just did all this great quarantining and social distancing For Nothing.  All the benefits of it just go up in smoke.  I'm not on board with that!  Hmm what's a life hack to protect society.  I'll think about it for a bit, then I'll let you know what I've figured out.  The good news is I'ma put some lunch in the oven in a bit, then start Entry Anew when said food is ready for consumption.  HEY I JUST DID THAT.  Now I'm here again!  I know, I know, doing a Go Away/Come Back MID PARAGRAPH?  I'm throwing all the rules of the playbook out!  Or all the plays of the rule book!  Plays and rules are involved somehow in a negative or counterintuitive way!
    Uh huh.  When Bolding or Italicizing Font in Microsoft FrontPage, it calls Bold, "Strong," and Italics, "Emphasis."  Is this a What do they call a Quarter Pounder in Cheese With Europe?  Or do they just not own the rights to the words Bold or Italics.  Cause I've never seen this before but you know what I LIKE IT breaks up the motonony of Font Descriptions.  Jeez, I dunno.  When I'm writing notes in Real Notebook, if I wanna use Italics, I just pout (I) around the border of the phrase I want in italics.  I can't just write differently and its italics.  Can anyone do that?  Same for bold.  I guess I could do bold but it's easier to just go (B)...(B).
    Writing Hack.  Anyway, if Independence Day is still a fair estimate of Vaguely Relatively Accurate Freedom Day, we're about 1/2 way there!  Don't give up now!  We still got aways to go presumably.  I want it to end too but not as much as I don't want this to all be for nothing and we all just decide its ok for it to spread.  That seems like a folly and/or fools errand and I'm not, "Down," with that.  NYPOST headline for when Stock Market Crashed-- DOW IS DOWn.  It only happens 1 out of every 2 days more or less so might as well make it Headline Material when it does happen with vaguely relevant puns.
    Hey after this paragraph Another Break.  Then resume in about 40 minutes with lunch by my side.  Lunch is 2 Hot Pocket: Philly Cheese Steak & Cheese Edition: Possibly with a few jaepenos stfufed inside.  We ain't talkn no Lean Pocket bullshit.  Not quite Croissaint Pocket level, but hot pocket that's right in the... pocket... Yeah.  Gotta hook up and zoom with a writing partner for LifeHack.  Which is a great way to, "stylize," the title.  No space double capital.  LifeHack.  Is it possible to specifiy Italics or Bold in a movie title?  Bold seems flat out impossible.  Italics probably is, too, but in an ideal world we'd be able to figure this one out, right?  Anyway, be back in a bit!  

Quarentine Go On!
   
    I'm not stuck here with quarantine, quarantining is stuck here with me!  Whatever you gotta tell yourself to make ya feel better.  That's my main advice to people.  Tell yourself whatever to make ya feel better!  LifeHackk.  No drink in about 3.75 days.  That's my best estimate off the top of my head.  Oh well I miss it but on the other hand I've not embarrassed myself being drunk out of my gord, not once, not eleven times!  I guess.  Makes the Quarantine more tolerable though.  Now its just a Whole Lot Of Nothin.  I do feel my relative-schedule helps.  Wake up, muck around, go back to sleep.  But the times I wake up and go to sleep are similar and the mucking around is the same and often in similiar orders!  Has anyone thought that Muslims are involved in this because of the Quran-tine.  Maybe its a good thing they're saving us with quarantine.  They saw Pandemic Coming and they were like QUARAN TO THE RESCUE JUST ADD SOME OVALTINE.  I'm Going Insane.

That Should Do It
   
    I haven't unplugged my computer inadvertently for at least 24 hours.  Which is a Fancy way of saying, "One Day."  One day we'll get through this.  24 hours we'll get through this.  24 hours prequel to 48 hours.  Saw that one comin' a mile away.  Anyway just took lunch out of oven and my Mom changed the channel from MSNBC or CNN to some Regular Show and I was like oh right that's still a possibility in life Changing The Channel.  Sometimes we gotta be reminded of the little things.  Like Other Stuff compared to Where We Just Were.  ANyway just about finished with Jalepeno Peppers but not sure what to do about it.  Came in a jar thats like for pickles, in a tub of brine, and its glass.  And there may be 1 or 2 pieces left but I can't stab them with a fork and I dunno fi I should just pour out all that brine in a cup and/or what do I do with the glass jar?
    Is the phase glass jaw because it reminds people of the phrase glass jar?  My guess is Anything's Possible.  Another good realization was Hey I Have Klonopin I can Take Once A Day Or So.  It's a lot better than some people got it!  Anyway, dinner tonight.  Possibilities-- Regular Soups, cup o noodles, sandwiches... that's about it.  I think I have Frozen Hamburger but not 100% on board with that deal.  Anyway lets say 2 more paragraphs after this one.  Anyway LifeHack cut Hot Pockets halfway (horizontally) after defrosting but before Oven and then its easy to eat that way inside out. 
    Wonderful.  I can also get started on a new pot of coffee.  That's worth something, right?  I think its great that jalepenos can be cold but add heat to your meal.  Not 100% on if Spicy = Hot chemically On Paper or we just associate it together because we generally use both in the same circumestances.  Also Spicy gonna burn up your moth whether its heated or chilled.  Chilled spicy.  Seems like an idea that's waiting to Pop.  How about Spicy ChilledFoods.  Nah that's no good.  Let's cross that one off the list right now!
    Alright last paragraph.  Then make some coffee.  Then I'm done for the day.  Tomorrow is a bunch of Chores, hours of going over supermarket order with My Essential Worker and then cleaming up Fridge and Freezer stuff once it gets here.  I think everyone of my Class and higher should be assigned one Essential Worker each to do all our dirty work.  It's the only way a civilized society might act!  Ugh.  That's no good.  But what can I do about it?  You could start by tipping the essential worker over 15%.  YEAH YOU'RE RIGHT I'M GONNA TIP 'EM A SOLID 17.5%!!!  Unless its a HUGE order.  Gotta top off somewhere, right?  The point is they may get Pandemic and die but I GAVE THEM 4 MORE DOLLARS THIS ONE TIME GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.  See ya later.

-2:50 P.M.

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Let Me See If I Punderstand You...
   
    Muy Bueno.  Anyway, new day.  Two days with a Shaved Face, still more or less Shaved!  It reminds me though, there was a period of time where, it happened gradually so I didn't notice it until it was too late, where the right side of my pubic hair was being outpaced significantly by the left.  Not when I was just blooming into adolescence.  FOr like several years in my twenties.  And after a few months I realized it and I was like well somethin's goin on there.  Not a big deal in and of itself but it can't be good  overall.  And I did nothing about it because I just sorta shrugged and was like well I guess I can live with this.  There was still some on both sides, but it was just 2/3rds the length on the right side.  But it evened up on its own is the point.
    VALUABLE INFORMATION!!!  I remember I used to be vaguely self conscious, without even realizing it, that I didn't have much hair on my scrotum.  Oh well some people are blessed with ball hair some people aren't.  In the end its probably a good thing.  That'd be my guess.  I like Pubic Hair because its the only appearance thing we kinda decided esthetically that most people don't know and when you find one who does know they're like hmm interesting I feel we know each other a little bit better now.  Partly because I'm seeing your private parts in general but also because I See What Kinda Pubic Hair You're Going For In General. VALUABLE INFORMATION!
    Also I haven't had to worry about it much lately but I'm scared of Someone Sucking A Ball.  It feels like sucking one ball would throw the delicate equilibrium that exists between both my balls in my scrotum.  You start sucking on one its gonna break that equilibrium and thats a risk I'm not 100% ready to take.  Anyway, this is life, right?  Gotta knock some of this Life Stuff out of the park so we can now go on with our regular lives.  Woke up pretty late for me today.  Around 11:00 AM.  So we're talkin late lunch around 3-4:00.  And we're talkin' I gotta disinfect and wipe off some stuff in about half an hour.  I got stuff to do is the point.!!!
    Hey new single from one of my top 10 favorite bands The Weezer and I'm on board with it!  Looks like they're delaying the release date of the entire album, though.  That Throws Everything Out Of Equilibrium!  Ya know, Alt Rock or whatever equilibrium.  I've I've had it up to here with Pop Punk Alt Rock Indie Rock Punk Pop.  Can't we all just agree to rename this genre of music What Michael Is Mostly Into.  Seems like that would make sense, right?  Also SKA.  I LOVE THAT HERB DON'T DOUBT IT FOR A MINUTE.  Rock Pop Grunge Twee Acoustic Punk Folk Ska Punk.  That's TIER II OF WHAT MICHAEL LIKES.
    I dunno.  Figure this section of entry will be 5 paragraphs.  And this is the 5th paragraph already!  All these figures are panning out correctly and whatnot.  Into episode 2 or 3 of Season IV of the wire.  WHY WON'T THESE KIDS LAY OFF PREZ HE'S NEW GIVE THIS DUDE SOME WIGGLE ROOM HE'S ONLY TRYING HIS BEST.  They end up doing that over the season.  Yeah but they should have done it FROM THE START.  NO SECOND CHANCES YOU WILL BE JUDGED BY THE ALMIGHTY FOR HOW YOU TREATED PREZ IN SEPTEMBER OF SCHOOL YEAR!  Sure we should give PREZ second and third chances, though.  He already shot up his car punched a minor in the face unprovoked shot a fellow cop possibly killing him with possible racial motives... BUT THATS BECAUSE HE WAS IN THE WRONG JOB.  EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES HE'S SORRY JUST LOOK AT HIM!  Dude also punched Valchek, his father in law and supervisor, but Valcheck had it coming!
    Having soem trouble with bolding things nad then uununbnbolding things.  Hey if I go witHEhao H TIS ISNT GOING VERY WELL!  The point is more paragraphs in the next 20 minutes.

ALL TOPICS MUST GO!!!
   
    Muy bueno.  Anyway, afternoon already, huh?  Start oven in about 15,30 minutes.  Pairin a Lean Pocket + Smart Ones Meal.  We're talking yep thats accurate not much more to say about that.  Anyway I wiped down with disinfectant and then wiped down with Plain Towel like 14 things!  I'm a productive member of society.  Also, now, the people we live with are the Only Society We Got Going On.  Except for that great film on Shudder: THe Horror Movie Online Emporium.  I dunno.  It sucks how if Computer gets accidently unpluggeed (un-accidently!) computer immediately turns off and then takes like 10 minutes to start back up overall.  Several different stages of Getting Back Up.  First it goes to what profile you into today.  Then I pick and its like alright hold up gimme like 1 minute.  And then the desktop appears and its like wait no hold up for a bit we gotta load up all the images on your desktop, the stuff you have set up to turn on always when computer starts, this could be a while...
    But the good news is Hey Wonderful.  Mom ordered me/family some COSMIC BROWNIES which I can only assume is to trick people into thinking they're marijuana confections.  Only way they're cosmic is that they're brownies with 3 M'n'Ms per brownie.  That's what makes it Cosmic.  BROWNIE WITH 3 CANDY CHOCOLATES IN SIDE OF IT?  NOT POSSIBLE ON THIS WORLD THAT'S SOME COSMIC CONFIGURATION.  I had I had one just to be polite and it was okay but this ain't really my thing thanks for the thought though.  However she did get me some Gum Which Is My Thing so all in all I appreciate the thought overall and some of the content based on that thought so overall Society is working pretty well for now.  Hey 2nd paragraph of seWS Good I was able to get out of Bold.  FOR NOW.  Permanent Bold may strike again at any moment and I have got to be prepared.
    Huh.  Anyway, what else is going on and crap.  Dad needs Freezer Space because of his blood infusions every 4 weeks and that is comin' callin' this Sunday.  So I gotta use up as little of Freezer as possible  That's part of life In Fact The Main Part.  Figure I might have a soup with Smart Ones instead of Lone Lean Pocket.  Figure lots of things.  This is Lunch It Can Make Or Break My Day don't just not give it enough thought that would be a folly or a fool's errand, something along those lines!  I think I'm suddenly getting back into Tales From The Crypt after like 2-4 days without it.  Got tired of it after 2 or 3 months, took a break for a couple of days, and now I'm like ALRIGHT IN HEADPSACE FOR SOME RE-ENJOYING ALL MY OLD FAVORITES LETS DO IT!!!
    Cool!  I dunno.  I'm always happy with soup but that pasta thats just tiny little spheres look gross but they taste fine.  I feel very strongly about this!  But then again there is that lone unpaired Lean Pocket just hanging out in the freezer.  Look at it its so lonely.  Figure I should eat it, right?  Anyway.  Has there ever been a Reverse Weird Al.  Where Weird al does an original song and then another acclaimed artist makes a parody of that?  That seems like an idea waiting to pop.  Probably, right?  Anyway only 1 more paragraph after this one to stick with multiples of 5s.
    Alright!  I think part of this new GettinIntoTheCrypts is alright last half dozen times I was having it on in the background NOW ITS BACK IN THE FOREGROUND and I'm just trying to get in the head space of where I was AS A KID watching this crap.  My favorite part is the closing credits.  I may have shared this thought a few days or weeks ago.  The opening credits is just we slowly go into a house through some hidden staircases and all and we enter a room and we finally zoom in on a coffin and CryptKeeper pops up ghoulishly laughing.  And the closing credits ARE THE EXACT THING IN REVERSE.  And It just always seemed cool.  Like by the end we even get to the gates of the house and the gates close shut with us outside.  And that's tehe final end of the show before we go back to The Rest Of HBO.  IT MAKES A LOT OF SENSE TO ME!! 

Read a Book?  What Kinda Scam Is That?!
   
    Either way I'm not buying it!  Lunch in about half an hour.  Looks like we're looking at FreshDirect as a family which has like prepared dinners, beef or poultry or some kind of Fresh Fish and they send it DIRECTLY to us.  Which if my parents feel is Okay Healthily I'm ON BOARD!!!!  Anyway, I dunno.  It's confusing because its a Wednesday and usually most new songs/albums are on Fridays.  I don't know how to feel about this.  Probably don't feel too strongly one way or the other.  That seems like the correct way to feel on a multitude of subjects.  Prove me wrong!  Anyway I had a Pop Tart + ONE EGGO for breakfast earlier what kinda scam breakfast is that.  Pop Tart wasn't enough to fill me up!  Eggo was just the right amount!  I feel Very Strongly About This One Way and Not At All the other way.
    Right?  Probably.  Fresh Director.  I dunno.  I can't wait to see Bunny Breakthrough to Naymond.  He does it EVERY TIME I binge watch the Horror (Er... The Wire...) and it always warms some of the cockles in my heart.  Marlon Brando-- THE WIRE... THE WIRE!!!! he saw it coming even back in Vietnam.  What else is going on.  I think The Day After Tomorrow is a fitting successor to Apocalypse Now.  The apocalypse?  NOW!?!?  Nah lets put that off for about two days.  Seems fair I got things planned for the next 36 hours I need some time to prepare for the apocalypse, get all my affairs in order and whatnot.  Cool!  Gonna take another break before lunch.  Lean Pocket I think is Jalepeno & Cheese.  Smart Ones is Teriyaki Chicken + I Wanna Say Broccoli?  Be back in a bit!

Be Careful You May Get Unplugged At Any Moment!
   
    Good news is I started lunch bad news is 1 of 2 lightbulbs in my room has gone out.  Good news is added jalepenos to Frozen Meal bad news is Lean Pocket ain't too well done.  Bad news is this light bulb thats out effects this lunch directly because its teh one that would shine on me and my meal presumably and now I dunno I can't figure out where to get my biteful froms!  I need direction!  Good news is paagraph is almost over good news is only 2 more good news is what else is good.  Good news is this Chicken Teriyaki with vegetables and brown rice legit tastes like take out chinese food which I think about once or twice every day as something like Yeah I miss that.  Also for some reason in our fridge we have an entire plastic take out container like one from Chinese Food which is just filled with ketchup packets but for a millisecond I'm always likei GOOD STUFF I GOT CHINESE FOOD.
    Bad stuff I Don't.  Although I guess I kinda do for the next five minutes.  Anyway 2 more paragraphs to go then I can Zone Out For THe Rest of the day Minus the 30 minutes in 2 hours where I make French Toast presumably.  I've been saying French Toast every day for the last week but something tells me this is teh day it actually happens!  So, great, what else.  Made some popcorn for myself to snack on yesterday and figured I just put the 2nd half of this into a plastic container, not unlike A Chinese Food container, just leave it out for a day, probably safe to eat the next day!
    Probably!  It's not as good at room temperature as compared to warmer than room temperature, but we all have to make sacrifices!  Although I'd totally be ok with no French Toast for tonight.  But then again we all have to make sacrifices.  And me making french toast is a sacrifice?  Or maybe NOT making French toast is a sacrifice.  I don't have all the details ya know.  Without french toast I can just go with the classic Sandwich + Soup.  With French toast I'd have to go with the classic... French... Toast... anyway lunch is just about over.  No Just Abouts to it.  Lunch is over!  I'll see ya tomorrow.

-4:05 P.M.

Tuesday, May 5, 2020

Yo Hablo Cinco De Mayo Que Pasa Con Palabras.
   
    ¡Makes sense to me.  Totally correct.  I always likfe the meta-word.  Palabra.  Yep that's on the vocabulary list alright I get it.  Hablo.  Speak, I'm speaking another language 100% on board with that word.  Miguelito,, I get it, that's my name + Lil or somethin' which I am at heart and at body.  Those are the three words I know.  I always liked Once.  11!  Your only chance to get this right is by saying this word means 11.  Alright I dunno what else is going on.  Lunch is lookin like a DOuble Hot Dog (2 with one bun) with some jalepeno peppers and also som sort of Crinkle Cut French Fries that I haven't had yet.  Seems promising based on the box, though!  MMm french fries I can See I bet they taste good going down my gullet.
    Sweet.  Bout 36 or so hours without a drink.  I should be dead by now!  That's my understanding of how alcohol works.  Anyway finished season 3 of The Wire.  Now it's time for Fun to begin!  The fourth season sees Prez as Good Guy and those kids won America's heart back in the day and I believe now one of them is running for Mayor of Baltimore.  I think he's got a good chance.  Which one.  Any of them would be good!  Also they're running As Their The Wire characters, not as actors who were in it.  Dukie is the Homeless Candidate he knows what its like out there.  Michael is gonna get things done, he may be a progressive who gets things done or any other kind of ideology.  Randy?  Smart guy great at debates.  Naymond?  He's the guy good at debates.  I know it I've seen it with my own eyes. And Randy is the guy who leaks the debate questions to whichever other candidate is running or something because he's snitch.
    Well that's good to know.  Probably.  I had problems with snitches in elementary and middle school.  Kids I thought were my friends always telling Teacher about whatever antics I was pulling.  Or not pulling, as the case may be-- they got me doin' stuff I ain't ever done do!  That's the one that hurts most of all!  I dunno, what else is going on.  Hot Dogs don't give oven instructions.  Frenched Fries don't give oven insstructions.  I think this is a scam I'm gonna put them in the oven and see what happens.  And then either way write a letter to the companies, either saying, YOU NEED TO BE MORE EXPLICIT TO JUST NOT MENTIONING IT NOW MY KITCHEN BLEW UP I'LL SUE YA!!! or I JUST USED THE OVEN FOR THIS STUFF AND I LOVED IT I'D LOVE TO WRITE UP SOME OVEN INSTRUCTIONS TO ADD TO THE BOX SO MORE PEOPLE CAN ENJOY WHAT I JUST ENJOYED.
    Win/win either way.  Neutral/neutral either way.  Don't effect me that much one way or another.  4th paragraph.  Figure I'll take some sort of break at some sort of time eventually.  Rings true, right?  "THE RING," IS TRUE?  OH NO EVERYBODY GET OUT OF THE WAY!  I dunno, somehting along those lines.  I don't care what movies say I'm not scared of answering the phone.  I'm scared of accidently saying my name and credit card number ans social security number BY ACCIDENT, but just the phone itself I'm cool with.  What I will never get over though is those imagues where you look at it carefully for 10 seconds and then SUDDENLY Exorcist girl shows up and there's a scary scream or something.  Happened to me twice as far as I can reember, and I refuse to let it happen again.  I don't care where the image is from, news, twitter, MYSELF.. I need to read the comments to know its legit and not going to terrify me.  Well, some images I trust.  But other ones I don't.  Makes sense to me.  I'll be back in a bit!

The Title of the Section of the Entry of the Website.
   
    No beuno biblioteca.  Startin' up oven in about 15 minutes in the mean time lets do this.  Gimme some of that Ska Erb  Muy Bueno donde esta?.  I don't get ASL.  Who really cares about L.  You're doin' som cybering Age and Sex seem pretty relevant.  WHERE DO YOU LIVE sounds pretty creepy in retrospect.  And if you're just looking for cyber sex why bother where they live.  Are you gonna be getting off especially because your partner lives in some... place... I dunno you figure out a good reference for this joke.  I can't do everything for you you have to learn yourself at some point.  Yo vivo en la biblioteca.    Sounds about right.  Figure this is 5th paragraph over all lets take a REAL break now ya herd mentality immunity.

Talk About a, "Close Shave!"
   
    No I wasn't.  But if I was, I'd be using it differently.  Internet says, "A narrow escape from danger or disaster."  Being Shaven isn't a disaster.  It's good.   Yah its good you avoided slittling your neck.  Maybe I WANT to slit my neck ever thing about OTHER PEOPLE for a change?  But anyway yeah just Shaved myself completely for the first time in 2 monghts.  Now I look like some sort of Shaven Guy I don't have all the details.  Anyway having lunch right now.  Figure knock another 5 paragraphs out of the park and  that'll do for today.  Anyway.  What else is crappening.
    More movies and TV to watch right?  I can't believe I quit drinking THE DAY BEFORE Cinco De Mayo!!!  Because I love celebrating other people's holidays from the sanctity of my own domicile.  Anyway.  I can still celebrate it without alcohol presumably.  Getting the most out of the Jalepeno peppers.  By which I mean I am using them. Pretty straightforward, right?  I duno.  Its a CLOSE SHAVE because you were shaving and almost cut yourself.  But itits NOT a close shave because you didn't shave well enough got too in your head about it. Now look what happened you haven't even shoven enough!
    Wow.  Jalepeno peppers remind me of Subway: The Sanwich Shop.  Gettin' all those chicken sandwiches with all the toppings my little heart desires!  Wwell, they stop at about 2 dozen Extras.  And at a certain limit they will stop giving me free portions when I say MORE MORE MOREE!!!  Something along those lines.  HoweveIHowever I can keep ordering sandwich after sandwich until I presumably use up ALL the toppings of every topping.  I just gotta be prepared to take scenerio to its only logical progression where I Now Am Owner Of THis Chain Of Subways.  I assume when they run out of toppings they sell me the deed to the building and the franchise because they have no other option but to declare Bankruptcy all because I could presumably sue and BEAT them for not having All The Ingredients!
    Hey, great, 2 more paragraphs to go.  Weird Al listening to, "Beat It," hmm... to be or not to be.  That's how English works for some reason.  And presumably Spanish.  I haven't done any research into fun palindromes from other langauge.  That seems like an intereting thing to look into, right? NO?  Oh well if its just me forget it not worth it!  Great.  I've been so out of the Relatively Good Hot Dogs game that are now to me interchangeable with Midshelf AND uppershelf  Hot Dogs.  Its all pretty close to me is the point.  That's life I guess.  Makes sense to me.
    Yeah!  One more paragraph.  Then I am lawfully allowed to continue on with my day the way I Want.  Which means more walking in circles PRESUMABLY.  Maybe help make some french toast or disinefct-wipe thing s and take out some sort of garbage and/or recycling.  The great thing about shaving yourself is you get 95% done but there's some stray hairs here and there and FINALLY my tic of pulling out facial hair HAS ITS MOMENT IN THE SUN.  I dunno, something like that.  New Spanish horror franchise-- Cinco De 13th.  Lets get Guillermo Del Toro in on this he sounds like a good fit for PRODUCER not director DIRECTING THIS WOULD BE A STEP DOWN FOR HIM.  Anyway he's Mexican but he speaks Spanish which is even better becaue I think Cinco De Mayo is mainly Mexican.  I think lots of things!  See ya later!  I won't have anything else thought out by then but I will be able to write some paragraphs Of Nothing!

-12:40 P.M.

Monday, May 4, 2020

Why No Breakfast?
   
    Possibly because I was drunk pretty well last night.  Into early morning.  So good news is-- I'm quitting alcohol for now. Bad news is-- I like alcohol 98% of the time.  Good news is--I will plateau in weight and not gain more at this rate.  Bad news is--i need something to reward myself and/or help writing this stuff.  Good news is-- Tigers.  Bad news is-- Bears.  Detroit Tigers, huh?  Must be for all the Tigers that call Detroit Home.  Yeah I bet there's probably a famous zoo in Detroit BUT NOT 100%!!!  I dunno Internet Research gave me no 100% perfect answers.  It's possible at some point Detroit hosted a 25 person team of Tigers. Makes sense to me.
    Anyway, coffee going on.  Great thing about No Breakfast is I can have lunch whenever I want!!!  We're talkin' 1 Cup of Noodles + 1 hot dog + 1 hot dog bun lets be specific i don't want anyone getting the wrong impression.  Anyway poured out all beers and liquor.  No going back now!  It'd be a sin to waste alcohol, that'd be my guess.  I think its fun to throw up but getting out of bed and rushing to bathroom toilet is NO fun.  Positive aspects on both sides.  Throwing Up is Good People but Running To The Toilet Is Good People on both sides.  Wow!  FIgure I'll start lunch after 5th paragraph.  Figure lots of things!
    Look I'm gonna be a Better Person without alcohol.  My parents agree!  I like having regaining their trust and whatnot.  Makes me feel good.  Anyway what else is going on.  Anything new in the news.  No news is good news.  Anything new in my life.  Ya II just told you PLUS in 2 or 3 days I will be pretty much done with the chemical addiction to alcohol.  Dunno what I'm basing that on, probably nothing.  Sounds about right, though?  Hmm Song Title Sounds Good To Me.  Wait, no.  Already have a similar song title.  Dammit I'm always one step behind!  Also that joke was in The Simpsons I saw recently  Tree House of Horror segment where Homer sells his sould for a donut.  And before he conjured up the devil he went to an emergency donut While at work. And it said I O U One Donut.  And Homer goes DAMMIT HE'S ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD.  So that's a joke I heard in the simpsons.
    Whatever Sounds Good To You.  Title from back in the day!  Back In The Day.  Future Title from when Today was Back In The Day.  Wait a second is that possible?  There will be a world where This will be back in the day.  Sounds about right to me.  Anyway, was re-watching Back II The Future I and this time around it seems like just a normal 80's teen movie during Current Day but makes good use of buttering its bread (? thats not a phrase) during the long act II and act III which is all great stuff.  75% of the movie ain't bad!  Also what else is going on and crap.  Hmm, Buttering Bread.  Feels like an obvious sexual innuendo but I can't figure out Bread.  Does it mean something with Vagina?  Something  with a yeast infection.  Can't have yeast without bread.  Maybe I'm taking the long way around for this one.  Like when you take Math in high school and they check your work and its all correct but you did more steps than you have to do.  Also the innuendo I started with is only 1/2 right if we remember correctly. 
    I dunno 5th paragraph!  Buttering Your Bread could just be the obvious pouring hot melted butter like at the Moving Pictures on some paper money.  I dunno maybe use coins make em horsderves.  With dollar money that's more like a salad.  Coins?  now you got a nice appetizer going. Also, I guess paper money is more like the Base of the salad, instead of lettuce or spinach or whatever.  Doesn't really make sense as a topping.  I think we accomplished a lot here in the paragraph.  Hey guess I'll take a break now.  Gotta take breaks at some point.  Without breaks what kind of man are you.  I'm ALL MAN I take breaks ALL THE TIME.  Glad we settled that here and now.  Be back soon.  ...Wait palindrome!  Ska 'Erb Breaks.  I think I'm not speaking out of school when I say Ska 'Erb would presumably be Marijuana and they they refer to breaks when they're doing some music to indulge in some Ska Erb. Alright Break time.

To Lunch or Not to Lunch
   
    Anyway, my dad just boiled some water for my Mom's cream of wheat.  Puts me in a tough position because I Need That For My Soup so do I heat it up more or less immediately, or do I wait as long as i feel like I want t wait.  Teacher-- To, "B," or not to, "B."  Cause teacher is undecided one way or another between either B-/B or B/B+.  Cracked that code.  I like how what hackers accomplishment is called Cracking Codes but they're called hackers not Cracke... wait that's no good.  Racial Epitaph in the mix.  Anyway, I dunno.  It's almost impossible for Reverse Racism to happen and I also feel linguistically at this point in time no white epitaph as far as my knowledge.
    Hey great.  I do this at least half a dozen times a day where I'm biting my nails and I'm like oh yeah can't do that.  which is immediately followed with yeah what can ya do i'm pot committed at this point.  And I'm happy to say a solid 50% or so of the time I do stop biting them nails.  #Truestory.  Why is that a hashtag.  Or True.  Or Storey.  Well its one out of three of those.  Maybe I shold try cream of wheat at some point.  Or oatmeal.  I feel like those are similar, right?  That'd be my guess. Where dos Porridge come into this conversation.   Is Gruel a crappy version of this, as well?  OK NEWS UPDATE-- Oatmeal is Gruel, CREAM OF WHEAT MAY Be As Well, and Porridge IS Oatmeal... ugh.  Wonderful.  I'd try some porridge.  People in Fairy Tales seem to like it who am I to argue.
    Yep.  Instead of trying 1 cup that's too cold, and the next one that's too hot, couldn't Goldilocks just sit down with the Hot Porridge and be like well a couple more minutes and it won't be too hot.  BUT I CAN'T WAIT!!!  Why does she need to ruin ALL THREE of these dishes not very considerate of other people.  Figure I'll take another break after this paragraph or so.  Start back up With Lunch.  I dunno what else is going on for some reason.  Poured some not-hot coffee on myself.  Well, on the clothes that are covering me.  No bueno I like these pants and this is my favorite undershirt that I wear hardly ever.  So the point is see ya in a bit!

I've Decided To Lunch
   
    Just keepin' ya updated!  Anyway 2 paragraphs to go.  Lunch was what I predicted + jalepeno peppers + hot sauce + 1/2 bread stick.  Anyways no drinking goin' strong.  1/2 of the waking day!  ALL the waking night so far based on previous information.  Anyway, I dunno.  Watch some more The Wire.  Maybe some more The Oz. Maye some other sort of thing I don't have all the answers.  One good thing about not drinking liquor is I don't have to save Soda for those mixed drinks.  The other good thing is hey this healthy I don't believe it.  Anyway last night I was pretty drunk.  Was carrying food or something up or down stairs and it got all over the stairs.  Also wasn't making sense at all.  i was talking to my parents and I had stuff I was trying to say but I couldn't put the words together.
    Yeah!  I'm just gonna end the entry right here.  Sure!

-2:17 PM

Sunday, May 3, 2020

Wow  A Website Never saw that one coming
   
    IFOr some reason I'm having troublg typing for now.  My Body ain't doin' too good.  Is that a symptom to a novel poblem.  Hands shakin' not able to type well.  I'm doing ok alright right now.  Seems like good news. S \uch is life.  Anyway hows it goung.  Morubasoduhsa[o dsfjsijcfsd{IJ[ijfsd ok now is  Maybe if I type real slow I can do it piece by piece.  I meant to do the random letter thing just to see if I could renew my relationshpi with my computer through my fingers.  Maybe I just got used to writing too much too fast.  Now my foibles have been exploited and I Have To Take It A Bit Eaiser.
    Anyway.  Jalapeño Peppers I got a few days ago I finally wiped down and got it ready for proper consumption.  Dad asked if they were pickles.  I said, no.  Life Moves On.  Fifteen Minutes later I say, unprovoked, There was a very short period in my life where I liked pickles.  Just six or so months.  Then I lost the taste for it again.  So basically My Parents Are YOU in terms of relationships with me.  Don't wanna jinx it but typing is going a bit better.  That'll learn 'em, that'll learn all of 'em.  GOod news is Macroni Part II of II is in the works for Lunch.  Also wiped down Bread Crumbs.  So I can mix in some Jalepeno Peppers AND Bread Crumbs to Macaroni.  Plus I got hot dog buns in the mix for some reason.  They are good for hot dog sandwiches but when I ordered it I was like yea you know what I can get A LOT of use out of this.  Any kind of sandwich, that's all I'm saying.  Maybe a large Dinner Roll type thing, as it would be used with Macaroni.
    Also told my parents, ya know you weren't far off asking if this was pickles because I just looked at the pickle jar n the fridge that hasn't been used in years, and its the same brand my jalapeño peppers were on.  Again, no answer.  Anyway also finally wiped down some more alcohol so I got that going for me/against me as well.  Anyway, whenever I see a fictional character in TV or Movie and they're smoking a Tobacco Cigarette, I always have the immediate reaction of HEY THAT'S LIVING as well as HEY THAT'S DYING.  No one millisecond after the other.  Nope at the same time I feel very strongly about this.  Anyway.  Are Mickey Mouse and Minny Mouse married, or are they brother and sister.  I've never seen that issue addressed 100%.  Sort of a The White Stripes scenario.  But with mouses.  Fictional mouses.  Sure I know the word Mice I know all the best words.
    Jeez.  I think the latest/most credible thing I read was that they WERE married and now they're just friends.  Seems about right.  The other thing I heard was they WERE brother and sister and now they're just married.  Hey, that's Rock 'n Roll, who am I to judge.  Also, no judge in his right mind would ever preside over siblings marrying each other.  No one, that's who!  Anyway I got this going on for now and typing is going pretty good.  Was worried I'd need a new computer because without proper Keyboard what good is a computer to anyone.  FIgure if I get a re-up with alcohol, it'll just be liqour.  Always the risk Cans will drip drip drop some drops of dripps.  On the floor!  No Es Bueno we have wookden floor or mock wooden floor or fina just dirt we have no floor we live on the dirt.
    Hmm.  FIfth paragaph.  I can keep typs and misspellings in now as an inside joke that its mu computers fault.  No I Can't EVERYBODY would hate that.  Even me!  And it's very hard for me to hate stuff.  Anyway.  When a husband is on the outs with a wife, and hes in the dog house now, is he ever really literally sleeping in the Dog's House.  Seems pretty emasculating for a man.  He should get a motel room or something.  Just sleeping in the dog house while life goes on without him inside the house, does not sound good for everybody involved.  Hey wonderful.  Gonna take a break now.  See ya in a bit!  We are all in the dog house now.

It's Just Not How I Imagined
   
    I just opened up Bread Crumbs package.  Really really really fine little grains of sand pretty much.  I thought it would be like 1/2-1/10 the size of croutons.  Like really mini-croutons.  Now I dunon what to do with this.  Maybe it's a drug smuggling operation.  Except for I smoked it--nothing!  Sniffed it-- still nothing, injected it--i dunno it might save corona virus why not people are saying very good things about bread crumbs.  Not Hansel and Gretel.  They're not on board with bread crumbs one bit!  Well they were at first.  Didn't turn out for them so well, though.  Why the Hell would anyone not only sand bread but especially when its been on the forest floor forever.  These kids must have been STARVING. 
    Are Hansel and Gretel married or siblings.  That's the only way two people can have a social relationship.  Prove me wrong!  Some birds chirping outside. Don't They Know It's Pandemic?  If we live long enough to see it, will birds evolve BACK INTO dinosaurs?  Well if survival of the fittest sees it fit to have birds survive as a different species, then that's what happens!  Sometimes I don't mind this Peanut Butter Banana Beer but sometimes I do.  Well, I don't NOT mind it... they're just doing their thing.  But not for me!  I do like the fact that its high in alcohol.  That's pretty good.
    Hey, wonderful.  The point is to Try Jalapeño Pepper I had half a lean pocket in fridge from a day or two ago, microwaved that sucker up, stuck in 2 jalepeno peppers, and hey it was fine.  I think the Lean Pocked Flavor was something like Jalapeño Chicken.  But I could still tell the difference!  AnywayANyway, there's no fun way of added an ENYA to an, "N," in text, but in real life, OH BOY THAT'S FUN TO DO.  I'm 100% on board with Enyas, accent sides are pretty good, and perhaps better than the enya is UPSIDE DOWN question mark/exclamation mark.  These are the truths no one dares to touch.
    I assume we add the question mark and exclamation mark at beginning of the entry is to properly inform the reader GET READY SOME QUESTION AND/OR EXCLAMATION IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN PAY ATTENTION HERE WE GO WITH THE SENTENCE..  Anyway had to sign something just now for some health care thing or something and my Dad is always SignatureShames me that my signature is not clear enough.  First of all-- FUCK YOU IM LEFTY ITS HARDER CHARACTERS WERE DESIGNED TO BE WRITTEN WITH RIGHT HAND WOE IS ME.  Second of all-- DONT MATTER AS LONG AS I'M CONSISTENT WITH IT THAT'S ALL THAT COUNTS.  Third of all-- MAYBE I'M NOT  AS CONSISTENT WITH IT AS I LIKE TO BE HONEST BUT IT COMES FROM THE SAME PLACE.
    WOW!  10th paragraph!  I don't believe it.  I was a little cautios about mixing up Format for Website this month, but I figured Hey Just Go For It.  And I feel like it's decreased quality of entrywriting by 10% but Hey That's Not Too Bad!  Next month we start all over again!  It's only 3 days into the month you're already abandoning the format?  NNO you misunderstand me.  I'm fine with it for the next 27 or 28 days and thats fine.  Better than fine!  That happens to be what I'm aiming for!  OH NO THEY GOT MY SIGNATURE.  NOW THEY MAY USE HOWEVER MANY DOLLARS OF MY MONEY IN THE ACCOUNT BEFORE I CAN GET IT STRAITENED OUT BY CITIBANK AND THEY GIVE ME THE REIMBURSEMENT PRESUMABLY.  FUCK just said I'm with Citibank.  Oh well, to be honest, I just used the first thing that came to mind.  I MIGHT be with Citibank but not 100% sure.
    Cool, cool.  Which city is citibank referring to.  NYC is my first instinct but I'm biased.  When I was a kid and the only time I was in Manhatten was for half a dozen field trip, I always thought of Manhatten as, "The City."  So my assumption is people everywhere you talk about The City that's what they're talking about.  I make lots of assumptions!  Right?  Said this before, but my family talks about Assumptions all the time when there is the opposite of assumptions going on.  I Assume You're giong to do this... IF YOU WERE ASSUMING IT YUO WOULDN'T BE ASKING THIS QUESTION.  So, please, continue with your question, but lets call a spade a spade, there's no assumption in this equation.
    Cool, Cool.  Let's call a Spade a spade.  I dunno  what even a Spade is.  Is it like something to dig up ground?  Hey wow my assumptoin was correct.  But I never alerted everyone I was assuming it.  It was my Private Assumption.  I have no idea what's going on anymore.  I wanna get together 2 and a half dozen people and were like EVERY OTHER WEEK WE'RE GONNA DO A FIELD TRIP!!!  Go to the zoo or the museum or a play.  Together! Adults going on field trips.  That's a money making business ready to pop!  It's like ladies (its usually ladies, right?) starting a book club.  But its for people who want to HAVE FUN FOR A CHANGE.  Let's go the fuckin' planterianism.  Or maybe the Botanical Gardens.  Natural History Museum?  Now you're talking my language!
    13th paragraph.  Anyway, if any of you wanna see my signature... NOT HAPPENING I'M TOO QUICK FOR YA.  Anyway I'm gonna be honest, when I drink this beer with 9% alcohol per volume, I can feel getting more drunk than if it was 4-6%.  Presumably 60-100% or so more!  The good news is Typing is back to normal but the bad news is For How Long?  AlsoAlso we rent a school bus to travel to and from the Field Trips.  No fancy ones.  I don't want ones with TVs built in.  Just a nice yellow school bus and we all have to room to socialize and misbehave a bit but DON'T STRETCH THIS RULE YOU MIGHT LOSE ALL YOUR PRIVLEDGES IF YOU STEP OUT OF LINE. 
    I never rode a bus to school.  Unless you count my Mom's car as a bus.  Which I don't see why you would do that it's a regular 4 seat car.  I would sit in the back at first (of my Mom's car).  As I got older I transitioned to the fron passenger seat.  Took some time to build the trust for such a thing but such is life.  Figure I'll take a break after this paragraph.  I figure lots of things I assume.  NO FOR THAT I KNOW not assume. That's a nother mis-use of the word.  I assume something that I really know 100%  WRONG YOU AIN'T ASSUMIN' SHIT.  Why would I stop this section now when 1 more paragraph gets ya to 15.  Why a lot of things.  I guess at this point my main life goal is to get on board with Peanut Butter AfterTaste Beer.  Even though I just specified for the neat future I will probably be doing Liquor instead of Beer.
    Probably!  Gotta do something instead of something else.  That's been my experience.  Hey Dummies I can watch some sort of TFTC.  Or 2nd of 4-so-fars Joe Bob Briggs: The Horror Movie On Shutter Experience.  Heathers.  I'm worried its gonna be a regular 80's movie with some bland horrorshow stuff mixed in.  Let me check internet on that right quick--  wikipedia says-- "Black Comedy Teen Film"  OH NO that's just what I imagined.  I think black comedy is the Wayans brothers or Tyler Perry.  YOU mean Dark Comedy.  Maybe I'm the one getting it reversed but one of us is wrong is the point.  Hmm Winona Rider.  I'm on board with that.  For some reasons probably I assume.  So on board with it I had to be explicit about it in this paragraph.  HEY see ya in a bit.  I like Bamboozled.  It's both a black and dark comedy.  Well done!    Probably a lot of Spike Lee movies are Dark Drama-Comedies.  Dark dramadies.  Drkdramody.  Portmanteaus are part of the game, baby.  Just because there's some jokes and or light hearted whatnot doesn't make something a comedy.  It adds COMIC RELIEF.  Not full fledged Dramedy, though, right?  Oh, right, was gonna take a break!

God Bless Me For Doing Gods Work
   
    I'm just being honest/modest/cogent/swordkid/... I feel I can make cogent rhyme with EST.  Just put m in coach I'm Way Past Ready!  I can't make sense of swordki... WAIT yes I can.  Holden Caulfield was on the fencing team or something.  As a kid. There we go he's a swordkid.  One day when I grow up I want to be Holden Caulfield.  Can't argue with a feeling!  Anyway, what else is going on.  Going with wearin Glasses as opposed to contacts today.  About 20-30% of the time I'm rockin' glasses.  Hey you holdin' any glass?  Seems like that's a good Future Drug.  I'll do some glass, sure, why not.  Makes you avoid throwing stones or something.  It's about time I thuoght I'D NEVER be done with throwing stones.  Yep sounds about right.
    I dunno.  Gimme some of that Kind Strain of Marijuana!  Worked for me in the past.  Dad is onto my tricksies of finishing a bottle of alcohol and getting Part II of II of bottles of alcohol.  Hey why you take this crap up.  I finished the old crap. Why u don't bring it down?  I dunno I didn't feel like it.  k k whatever.  Wonderful!!!  I think it was great that my exact generation grow up with the Scream Series as our go-to flat out horror movie.  Because its funny and selfaware and all that.  How old was I for first one?  8 or 9 I'd say.  And in Scream II yeah just like everyone else I was very upset when ****** died.  HE WAS ME I WAS HIM NOOOOO.
    Cool.  Black lady sidekick to Sydney.  WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS THE FIRST To go?!?!??  That's what you get for calling it a Black Comedy.  People got confused!  Not a lot of black lady super-monster-villians that I can think of.  Can't even think of 1.  Which it may exist at some point but I just don't know about it!  Even Candyman, just an African American Man is novel enough.  Dunno about lady African Americans, though.  And don't act ike you're not affraid of them!  You're terrified of them than anyone!  Domecratsprmaryise.  Good idea for a pitchable movie where its a horror with a black woman villain-- something along the lines of voodoo. We all agree voodoo is horror and that black/latinx women do voodoo.  So put two and two together and suddenly we got a movie!  That winks at the idea of political correctness while balancing it with some witty dialogue and some novel scares.  And the lady is an anti-protagonist.  And not an antagonist.  Wait, yes, antagonist.  TEN MILLION DOLLARS PLEASE.
    Jeez.  The point is slowly but surely am I amassing half a dozen things to put on Sandwich.  We got the turkey, we got cheese, we got hot sauce, we got jalapeño peppers.  Are You Not Satisfied?  Hey we even got canned chili.  Pour that over some sandwich I think that's something I can get on board with.  The point is every night I listen to 2-4 Fountains of Waynes songs.  Whatta scam that he's gone.  I never got to Like This Band Explcitly as opposed to just enjoying its discography on my MP3 Player like the other 2 dozen bands I really, really liked.  Whatta scam is the point.  What else.  4th paragraph of this section?  Figure I'll take a small break after this one, Start Up Lunch, then write some more (not even necessarily 5 paragraphs) while eating lunch.  I wish I could figure out a way to eat macaroni One Macaroni at a time.
    I wish I could figure out lots of things.  Well, i figured out one thing.  Hot sauce no bueno for macaroni.  Maybe for spaghetti where you do 50% spaghetti Sauce 50% hot sauce.  Or some other proportion I can't pull off the top of my head.  How about 75% spaghetti and 25% hot sauce.  I guess I was wrong-- I could pull another guess off the top of my head!  Mostly museums I wanna go.  Get some sort of (girl?)friends and check out Museum of Modern Art While High.  I'd be like oh man this shit is retty NOT AS MUCH AS YOU THOUGH LOL GOTTTEMMMMMMMM.  Apparently that's my impression of how life goes.  Alright gonna eat lunch in about half an hour, I will rejoin you then.

I Swear On My Life
   
    So the bread crumbs in and of themselves were a dud.  Taste like crap.  However, the 75% of macaroni which didn't touch the breadcrumbs were that much beeter.!  That's where I'm at for now.  Jalepeno Peppers are alright by me, in and of itself.  I guess breadcrumbs are when you're cooking ot something.  add some breadcrumbs to a chicken breast, suddenly you got a breaded chicken beast!  WHERE WERE YOU BEFORE TWO DAYS AGO.  I can't believe I made an effort to mix up this bowl of macaroni.  Now Every Piece is contaminated with bread crumbs!  I cn live with that I guess. I learnt a lesson, I won't be doing it again, now will I?
    Cool!  I dunno.  Lets aim for this being the last paragraph.  That way I can still drink some more without any pressure for making the most of it!  Maybe if I put this Macaroni with breadcrumbs in the oven!!! Sounsd like a fascinating experiment I may or may not try some time.  Anyway, dinner tonight?  Got a thing in and of itself where its 4 meats in the same thing.  Turkey, Salami, Ham, some sort of other turkey presumably.  Well, this was fun.  Presumably.  If you're on board with Adult Field Trips you can get me at mankindguy@gmail.com.
    Hey one more paragraph.  I bought Civilaztoin: 5 or Maybe 7, 2 years ago but have never been able to play it with the Windows I am on.  Maybe this Text stuff is the kick in the pants I know I need to play some Civilization.  Anyway, jeez.  Less than 1 season left for The Oz: The HBO The, and 2.5 for The Wire.  And Heathers, the movie that's available to me on Shudder.  As unpleasant as these brad crumbs can be raw, they're probably get to add something in the oven.  So we got that going for us?  Me, at least.  I'll see ya later.

-2:05 P.M.

Saturday, May 2, 2020

[TEMPORARY TITLE UNTIL I THINK OF SOMETHING BETTER HOPEFULLY]
   
    I NEVER do temporary title.  That was just my idea for the title in and of itself.  This entire thing is a set-up!  Uh oh shouldn't have let you in on all that info.  Now you can use that knowledge against me somehow and whatnot!  ANYWAY another day alive.  I LIKE those odds!  They're not odds, they're simple base information.  I figured that out exponentially and whatnot.  OK lets start for real.  Well I could mean it intentionally that I'm alive another day but just be mistaken myself.  Then there's odds.  Oh boy are there.

I'm sorry, What?
   
    Two titles in a row in Italics?  I'M SO SORRY, WHAT?  Anyway Soda drinkin' today for the first time a long long time.  We're talkin 3 or 4 days.  Accidentally turned my computer off on account of unplugging it to move it to a different surface without thinking.  I was like well this'll be easier if I just move the computer and then re-plug it back in in 10 seconds. But it turned out to be a folly on my part, a foible I possess some might say, and then I had to wait 10 minutes for it to load up!  Good News though I didn't like what was the current title until I changed it to this current title.  Also, googlechrome restoring my pages instantly?  I'M ON BOARD.  Also, calling a webbrowser, " [your company + Chrome?"  I'M ON BOARD WITH THAT!!  Seems Hip, that's all I'm saying.
    First it was AOL.  Then it was Internet Explorer.  Then it was FireFox. Now its Google Chrome.  Hopefully we go back to AOL as the next thing, that'd be fun.  Would people follow me to Angelfire if I wanted to stop paying for my own domain?  My guess is Who, Huh?  Angelfire, eh?  Yeah I guess.  Wow!  Angelfire seems very hostile and blasphemous.  Didn't stop us from making free personal webpages back in the day.  Anyway, must have talked about this before, but now I have a little more wisdom and whatnot-- I remember Yahoo being by far the main search engine and then hearing about Google and being like yeah that's a fad, that'll never last.  Yahoo got this game LOCKED UP!
    Back when Ask was ASKJEEVES.  The good ol' days!  Can  that be an alternative to Alexa.  Lets get a virtual butler!  C'mon you can do it presumably THAT SOUNDS LIKE FUN.  And all I ask for is one cent from anytime someone uses it.  Seems fair, right?   It takes the next logical step.  From Alexa just being a fun name to say and now we're getting deeper and deeper into having relationships with our computer/search engines.  Seems unhealthy, right?  And the beginning of many Sci-Fi Future movies.  ALEXA YOU MAY GO NOW NOW ASK JEEVES TO GET IN HERE SURE WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT YOU, ALEXA, BEHIND YOUR BACK!  I'M BUILDING A FANTASY SOCIAL SEARCH ENGINE WORLD WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOT GOSSIP WITH YOU ALGORITHMS?
    Wow.  We got that  current-->future to Not Look Forward To.  Lunch today?  Some pasta is in the work.  Either Macaroni straight up or a cup o noodles + low ass calorie Smart Ones: The Meal.  That's not for another hour or two, though, right?  I like how this whole time I thought the main protagonist in Oz was Beecher but then it turns out to be O 'Riley.  O Riley Keel.  Wraps back around just like using AOL as WebSiteViewer. ...almost.  gotta move a lot of pieces around but there's, maybe.  Anyway yesterday I thought I came up with a genius and somehow overlooked palindrome, This Shit.  Not quite a palindrome.  Only an anagram.  Oh well what can ya do.  Pour yourself some more soda to mix with alcohol.  That's always a fun thing to do.  Be back in a bit!

-11:21 A.M.

Nonsense Maker
   
    Anyway, half a dozen times every day now I have the thought hey isn't it great that I Still Presumably Don't Have Coronavirus?  Really makes you appreciate life more once you realize hey I'm not dead that's pretty good!  Sounds about right.  How many more times can I watch the Tales From the Crypt where its Bobcat Goldthwait and Don Rickles before I get tired of it.  Well, 4 or 5 Times Ago.  That was in my top 2 favorite episodes, with the other one being the Gamblor Ones.  Again, got tired of that one half a dozen ago.  Right.  What's that?  You wanna know which other Tales From Th Crypt are in my top five?  Well lately I like the one with the lady who falls in love with the scarecrow.  I like the one with Jeffrey Tambor.  And I'd say in 5th is 2/3rds of them I can't make a case for one way or another. 
    Desktop Computer?  Nobody's gonna tell ME what surface to put this computer on!... I think I'll go with a desk but that's because I want to.  Wow.  I have a bunch of grat titles on my computer because of Crappy Random Pieces of Song I would make and add to my computer.  Each one needed a title!  Now I'm flush with titles but I'm not gonna fall into that pattern.  New Titles!  That's the Crazy Sheet pr... wait, no.  New Titles with the occasional old title!  That's the crazy sheet PrOMISE booyah we got a promise in the works.

May Day II: The Reckoning
   
    Now you know that's a new title!  It's never been May 2nd in the past 8 or 9 years.  Not to my knowledge.  And if it has been they sure have been doing a shitty job getting that date Out There.  Each day has to raise money and is competing against other dates, right?  Only way that makes sense!  ALRIGHT most sympathetic (to us)/well meaning/all aroung good people in The Wire GO-- Bunny, Bubbles, Kima, McNulty, All 4 kid main characters from season 4, ALRIGHT GO ABANDON THIS LINE OF CRAP IMMEDIATELY!  Wow!  What did Carver ever do to anyone?  He's He's done his fair share believe you me.  For example he crossed over into OZ: The Other HBO show and assumed an entirely different identity WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE ONE PERSON CAN BE TWO PERSONS AT ONCE??? Not buying it!   
    But I'll try selling it anyway.  Rolly Kally.  For a long time if I was gonna decide to responsibly take a Klonopin or Ritalin for purposes of Getting Into Entry Writing Mode, it was Ritalin.  In fact, that's one of the actual purposes I got for it.  Now I like Klonopin.  Yeah I can do this just Relax.  That's how life goes I guess.  Klonopin is what happened to Richard Gere's anus.  Not a pretty sight.  That's what you tempt for testing fate.  He should have seen it coming!  Anyway I think I may finally make myself macaroni for real after wanting to for a while but not having the disciple to take 20-30 minutes out of my life to prepare for it.  Oh well I can spend that time waiting for it to be ready to Think Some More About How Lucky I Am to Not Be Dead Yet.
    When previously healthy people die of Corons and arrive at Heaven Afterlife are they gonna be like alright Heaven! or are they gonna be like WTF WHY ME GET UNLUCKY WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT JUST MY LUCK!!!  Probably not on account of those things probably not existing.  I think they have a good grievance.  WHY them?  Give God an earful once its done.  It's the only way he'll learn.  Or, maybe he'll stop being a jerk for future people.  You complaining to God is the only way he'll ever learn to make life easier for you/other people.  I think God'll let them steam for a minute.  He's used to it.  But over time Ship Up Or Ship Out ya heard me.  Something along those lines. 
    I hear ya.  Now I see MayDay is about celebrating Labor but for a while I was just like isn't that a thing when military planes crash?  They go MAY DAY MAY DAY.  How is that relevant to Today?  Anyway.  Past several times I wanted pasta I split the difference and just made myself Cup o Noodles.  Takes about half the amount of time as full fledged pasta.  That's the ceremony when Pledges to a fraternity/sorority finally graduate to Regular People in those subcultures.  You are a full fledged...  pledge, its got alliteration so you know its good.  Anyway What Do We Do Now?  ... ... ...
    12th paragraph!  Great, what else.  Figure I've gained between 5-10 pounds over the last 2 months.  I figure lots of things.  This being a prime example of me figuring things.  ...not a bad name for a band.  Richard Gere's Anus. ..wait yes it is.  Now that we got That Settled, lets write some more.  Hmm, if this is 12th paragraph, I figure I could probably make it to 15 and then Start Up Pasta.  Weren't they supposed to be legalizing marijuana in NY?  Does anyone ask Cuomo that at his press conferences?  Is he even doing press conferences or just talking At people by his lonesome.  These are questions that could never be answered but I think they were supposed to be legalizing marijuana whatever happened to that.  Where's the studies that Marijuana somehow magically cures your symptoms of Corons.  It doesn't cure the disease, but makes you feel better!  Presumably it would, so lets get that message out there, sounds about right?  Hmm, maybe it'll not help respiratory system (or maybe it will!  the studies thus far have been inconclusive to the best of my knowledge), so lets start out with edibles and move forward from there.
    Wow!  Can you smoke edibles.  That'd be my first question if they legalized edibles and not marijuana cigarettes.  My second question would be hey what else is going on.  I remember having a conversation with my Mom a year or two back where she was not on board with edibles but liked the idea of smoking a joint or something.  She may have done it when she was very young, obviously haven't done it in the last 40 years or so... but she's like If I'm Gonna Do It LETS DO IT smoke that shit Right?i Except at only 10% the enthusiasm  that you may be assuming from this paragraph.  I don't think she's that interested in it either way.  She was just continuing a conversation and was speaking hypothetically.
    Oh well, what else is goin' on.  I think when I was a kid starting out marijuana freshman year in high school, the main go-to strain that was supposed to be the best was Sour Diesel.  Not 100% on how much what I smoked was that, but I remember that being like the best kind that's going around while at the same rate of 20 dollars a gram.  If you could get sour diesel  that's a great way to use your hard earned money.  Also I had no hard earned money unless you consider my parents monthly stipend they gave me which I can't remember.  Was it 200$ a month?  Maybe 200$ every two weeks?  That sounds about right, I definitely don't think it was more than that.  The number 200 sticks out in my mind, though.
    Cool!  Take a break after this paragraph.  Muck around in my room for a bit and then start them that there elbow macaroni.  I never thought too uch about money first 2 years of college because I had like 5 or 6 thousand dollars of my own money saved up in bank from playing poker in high school, both live and online.  So I was always of the mindset I could pretty much afford any little thing I wanted.  Cause of that combined with the stipend and whatnot.  As well as Cafeteria Cash the first year which is a phrase I made up but gets the point across.  Anyway, there's gonna be AT LEAST 1 age group, year by year, that was supposed to start college next Fall and either are happy to go on and do it Online presumably if they could, but most people are liek WTFFFF.  Anyway, make ZOOM friends with your classmates, you got nothing better to do.  Have a thing where you get drunk by yourself but are zooming together and THAT'S COLLEGE NOW.  You just described my current life minus the zooming with other people.  I get along with my parents though and clearly my Mom is down to party and my Dad is down to do school online classes!  Best of both worlds!  MY HOUSE IS COLLEGE.

-12:27 P.M.

May Day III: Nobody Saw It Coming!
   
    Sure, I guess.  Finally made pasts 4 real.  Good sized portions.  One might even say Perfectly Sized Proportions.  You can anything you want!  Every now and then I think, when eating Macaroni, what if I just literally had 1 little piece at a time.  How would that work.  Probably not so well.  Anyway, got 4 cans of beer ready to be disinfected and put in Refrigerator:: The One That's My Refrigerator Edition.  Also almost done with alcohol bottle I of out of II.  The point is I added broken off pieces of a Breadstick to Macaroni and let me tell you bread got soggy and wasn't really pleasing at all.
    Anyway, this'll probably be Lunch or Dinner tomorrow.  Probably lots of things!  Speaking of The Wire, I don't think I ever finished The Duece:Wherever it's up to.  I could do that in theory.  IN THEORY.  The point is I dunno you figure it out.  Figure'll be the Last Section of Entry.  Mom got some Frozen Veggie Burgers probably due to a suggestion my brother made.  NObody want that not in these trying times.  Hmm if its such a trying time why not try frozen veggie burgers.  I make an interesting point.  I hope  Probably watch some more TFTC.  I know I rag on it these last few days but its great!  My favorite part is when they do the Intro in reverse at the end.  The intro is we're slowly going into a haunted house through all these rooms and then there's a Coffin Room and Crypt Keeper pops out of the coven do his Crypt Creeper thing.  And the end credits are just exactly that but in reverse.
    Cool! I like the very end of that.  When you're going backwards out of the estate and a gate/door thing closes on you.  Back to The Crypt By My Lonesome, says the Crypt Keeper.  Anyway lets get down to brass tacks we need a ReBoot of Oz: The Prison Drama Show.  I know they killed off 3/4 main characters by the end of the series I dunno maybe A New Class something like that.   Anyway lets get down to brass tacks What Do I Do For Dinner?  Anyway Chili from yesterday was great.  I dunno, I'll see ya later presumably!

-1:41 P.M.

Friday, May 1, 2020

This New Format Can Make or Break Me!
   
    Which One is good again?  I'd say, "Make," under most circumstances, but Break is a good thing as well.  In that I may Break On Through To The Other Side or something.  It's possible!  Anyway Great News Everyone the battery for my computer is dead.  While Metallica has led us to believe we cannot stop the battery, my computer's story tells a very different tale.  Anyway so as long as its plugged in Great No Problem but the second its unplugged BLAM USELESS.  Apparently I can buy a new battery.  I'll put that on my to-do list.  The priority is somehow figuring out a way to retrieve the hard drive to my Personal Computer from the 2000's.  While the computer is presumably shot to tell.  But if its possible to Retrieve Harddrive,  Probable lots of fun Recordings and Notes that I'd enjoy for 5 seconds and then be like actually this is weird I don't like this one bit.
    Sure I know 5 Metallica Songs.  I've even listened to the 5 Metallica songs I know!  Anyway another Friday another weekly supermarket chore down.  Well, not everything has been wiped with disinfecting spray, we just got the Fridge and Freezer stuff for now.  But the hassle is mostly Bein' With Dummy fixin' up my order.  He was no Dummy he was actually pretty On The Ball.  Which is a phrase for some reason?  Maybe its a sports reference.  Maybe its a lot of things!  In The Shawshank Redemption there's a pretty on the wall, too!  I think we can drop the, "Girl," or, "Woman," or whatever else is pretty.  Just call 'em pretty as a noun.  Check out that pretty on the wall.  Well that's dumb.
    I think it's dumb to spell dumb dumb but dummy dumm.  Shouldn't it be Dumby?  Anyway cause my computer turned off and on I lost where I was in Oz: The TV Program.  Now I don't remember where to resume, and that's great cause its just the kind of excuse I need to abandon that re-binge-watching.  Anyway, if you are binging a show you've already seen, and presumably you were binge watching the first or several times around, now you're re-binge walking.  If you're re-binge watching in your kitchen, you're eating your own vomit before vomiting it up again and then repeating that process half a dozen times.  I don't see the upside in such an action but who am I to argue what people do in the privacy of their own kitchen.
    For example, got some Bread Crumbs from Supermarket.  Figure I could put that in soup.  My family was like THAT'S DUMB.  Then I was like well what about Pasta?  And they were like THAT'S ALSO DUMB.  Then I was like what if I want birds to play with and I get them by luring them into my kitchen somehow.  And they were like I TIRE OF THIS CONVERSATION GO TO YOUR ROOM.  That's my relationship with my parents in a nutshell.  Nutshell.  Double negative exclamation.  NUTS!  HELL!  I TIRE OF THIS RIFF LETS START A NEW PARAGRAPH.
    Hey 5th paragraph.  You know what that means.  OCD is kickin' in!  Anagram of OCD is Doc and/or Cod.  Lets get to the bottom of that.  Anyway.  So far I'm okay with New Format.  New Format, Same As The Old Format.  Wait that's incorrect.  It's clearly a new format.  Font and background colors are reversed.  Yep, checks out, clearly a new format, right?  That's how I feel.  There's Batteries, there's Watch out For The Sand Man, ...had to go to search engine but Fade To Blackness rings a bell..  Great so I know 2 and a quarter songs.  Get off my back about it okay?  New section in a little bit! 

-11:41 P.M.

INTERLUDE

Thinking of Past Lyrics, 3 of my favorite lyrics that I wrote in high school off the top of my head--

    My name is Moses, I'm gods gift to women, fill their face with semen...

    My name is Jesus, turning water into wine, drink it all up, hit the girlies from behind!

    And finally, in the song about abortion from the father of the girl's point of view--

    I will not let my daughter kill my grandchild, cause I got mad rhymes like Oscar Wilde!

    Sure I've let you in on those before presumably.  That's Why It's Called An Interlude It's A, "Best Of," or something.

It's A ShitShow!!
   
    Well I figured that one out.  About time!  Lunch is in about half an hour.  We're talkin 3 onion rings, 7 chicken nuggets, and a Smart Ones:The Frozen Dinner Meal.  Anyway, season 3 of The Wire-- the overlooked one! Fist season was The Wire.  Second season was the White People.  Thid one?  Overlooked +Hamsterdam one,4th season School one, 5th season Dumb Homeless Killer/Newspaper one.  I like the 3rd because its the middle.  Cracked that code!  I remember the first couple of times Watching This Show I had faith in the white guy who eventually becomes mayor.  Even the 2nd or 3rd time around, I'm like, well he's just doing his job!  Now I realize he's an evil fuckwad piece of shit who deserves the death penalty.
    Cracked that code!  Hows Baltimore doing these days.  Presumably still in Maryland, that'd be my first guess.  Marry Land.  Well this is a if we can marry ppl of the same gender, what iff... to its most logical solution.  I WANNA MARRY MY LAND.  IT'S BEEN THERE FOR ME GOOD OR BAD.  ALSO I WANT IT SANCTIFIED SO THAT WE CAN GET, "INTIMATE!"  That's how States Names go.  I liked the part of today where we got 2 bottles of Orange Juice but I don't like the part where I already finished 2/3rds of One of the bottles.  Mom was JuiceShaming Me just now even though I'M THE ONE WHAT THERE WANTED TO ORDER THAT JUICE IN THE FIRST PLACE AND WHATTNOT.  Hey also good news My Mom took some initiative and got 2 cans of Chili w/Beans (and hopefully meat!) for her and me.  I'm on board with that kinda thing!
    I'm on board with all kiiiiinnnnndssssof things.  Wonderful.  Cool!  Remember the DH in Baseball Chili Davis.  If you were me you'd remember him.  Because clearly I remember him.  Maybe he was a 1st baseman at times.  My guess is Permanently DH.  Apparently he was an OUTFIELDER when his MLB career began.  Wow!  WHose on first.  FUCK YOU I DON'T GIVE A DAMn GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT AND WHATNOT.  See, I'm good at Improv.  Just respond to anything with a FUCK YOU I DON'T GIVE A SHIT.  Cracked that code!  I dunno.  WOW goona take a break after this paragraph.  THen get Right Back To It when Food is Ready For My Eating and I Eat While Doing This.

How New Chair Holding Up
   
    Well pretty well now that you ask.  It's totally still put together an entire year later than when I got it/put it together!  Anyway, trying onion rings instead of french fries?  That's accurate that's what I'm doing!  Anyway, eating lunch for this section of entry?  Also accurate.  Anyway poured myself some beer?  Totally accurate!  I dunno.  Write some crap, presumably.  Was talking to Parental Units on whether its safe to get some Roast Chicken or Steak or Somethin' Like That from supermarket and they weren't sure!  I don't believe it!  Something like that May happen but I don't wanna risk it we'll play it safe one way or another.
    Cool!  Man chicken nuggets.  Whatchu on board with?  Chicken nuggets.  Looks like I'll be making French Toast by my lonesome tonight.  Something along those lines.  What episode am I at in The Wire I wanna know if Carver is 100% on the up and up or is Being Some Sort of Police Jerk.  I dunno.  The good news is there's good news?  Hit me up right quick.  Because I ate a Smart Ones as part of my lunch there's that much space left over in the freezer.  Smart of Me!  I am One!  As Per Metallica Song.  If it were up to me, I'd experiment with making some pasta and ouring bread crumbs on it.  But it ain't up to me now is it?  Is it?  Ugh oh it May be up to me!
    Hah totally ate chicken nuggets.  Its in the past now you can't change that fact or anything.  Well, great.  New Shudder; Joe Bob Briggs Edition movies toinght and/or tomorrow!  Mostly, "Or!"  Maybe I can do some Chili but DAD WANTS SOME FRENCH OTAST.  Chili Davis.  Something along those lines.  I always felt like Prince Fielder is a sequel to Chili Davis.  Or, more accurately, Cecil Joe Fielder.  Hmm spoiler alert-- there is a Cecil Fielder (no Joe) but it appears they're not even related.  Whatta scam!  I hate being scammed so much!  I'll see ya later.

-1:12 P.M.

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